plz any suggestions....i am betrayed

[sofee 0]

hello everyone----

i am new to this forum, a friend of mine suggested this for me.

My parents are from Pakistan and I was born in states. so I am US citizen.

I got married 2 1/2 yrs back to a pakistani guy(distant relative).

We applied for CR1/IR1. After marriage i came back to states.

in the meantime, we had few problems with each other, he is a bit conservative.

i visited him three times. He interviewed at US embassy in Islamabad

in july and got IR1 approved.

As i mentioned before we had few marital conflicts,

we didnt talk for a month, then i heard from one of our relative that he is

in states. HE NEVER TOLD ME THAT HE IS COMING.

i dont know his where abouts, he must have changed address at POE.

is there anything i can do to send hime back to pakistan?

can i get his address from USCIS?

he must have filed AR11 as well to get green card.

i feel rejected, betrayed, shattered.........

[Penguin_ie 5,994]

With an IR-1, he'll automatically get a 10 year green card, and whoever sponsored/ co-sponsored him is on the hook financially. Not much you can do, though as the visa is for a foreign spouse to join the US citizen in the USA, maybe a phone call to ICE/ USCIS explaining what happened might get them to do something. I doubt it though. Divorce and move on.

[Krikit 1,164]

Moving from IR-1/CR-1 to Effects of Major Changes.

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

hello everyone----

i am new to this forum, a friend of mine suggested this for me.

My parents are from Pakistan and I was born in states. so I am US citizen.

I got married 2 1/2 yrs back to a pakistani guy(distant relative).

We applied for CR1/IR1. After marriage i came back to states.

in the meantime, we had few problems with each other, he is a bit conservative.

i visited him three times. He interviewed at US embassy in Islamabad

in july and got IR1 approved.

As i mentioned before we had few marital conflicts,

we didnt talk for a month, then i heard from one of our relative that he is

in states. HE NEVER TOLD ME THAT HE IS COMING.

i dont know his where abouts, he must have changed address at POE.

is there anything i can do to send hime back to pakistan?

can i get his address from USCIS?

he must have filed AR11 as well to get green card.

i feel rejected, betrayed, shattered.........

Your marital problems aside, you applied for an IR1 visa for your husband, it was approved, and he used it to enter the US. At any point during the process you could have withdrawn your petition and ended it. You did not.

There is nothing illegal about what he's done. At this point, you could divorce and he would still be able to remain in the US. He met his obligation to obtain an unconditional green card based on marriage by remaining married to you for more than 2 years, and you continued to support his application by not withdrawing it. Unless you have evidence that he lied in order to get the visa, there is nothing you can do. Divorce and move on with your life.

[AbbynSheryl 0]

there is nothing u can do to send him back to pakistan, just move on . wish u luck, abby n sheryl

[Brother Hesekiel 2,236]

Not to step on anybody's toes, and I assure you that this is not my intention, but we have about 300,000,000 people living here in the US, many millions of which come from foreign countries, so before "importing" someone from a country far away, marrying a "distant relative" as the OP stated, one should better be 100% sure about the surrounding circumstances.

I do understand that many people like to (a) marry someone with an identical cultural background (as, on the contrary, others might want to marry someone from a different cultural background), and (B) the desire to help a family member to immigrate to US, but how often do we read about OPs who met someone only once, or a few times, initiated that person's immigration procedure, then get totally disappointed after just a short while when they learn the person they married isn't as they hoped for.

Call me crazy but I think before you MARRY someone and vow to spend the rest of your natural life on planet Earth with them, you better KNOW in the bottom of your heart that this is the right person.

[Y's_habibitk 2]

Im sorry this happened to you. I would imagine he has brought great shame on his family for abondoning you. Let him deal with that and be done with it.

[Minya's wife 25]

Not to step on anybody's toes, and I assure you that this is not my intention, but we have about 300,000,000 people living here in the US, many millions of which come from foreign countries, so before "importing" someone from a country far away, marrying a "distant relative" as the OP stated, one should better be 100% sure about the surrounding circumstances.

Your intention is not to step on any toes, yet you chose to use the rather pejorative term of "importing" when you're referring to family based immigration?

I do understand that many people like to (a) marry someone with an identical cultural background (as, on the contrary, others might want to marry someone from a different cultural background), and ( B) the desire to help a family member to immigrate to US, but how often do we read about OPs who met someone only once, or a few times, initiated that person's immigration procedure, then get totally disappointed after just a short while when they learn the person they married isn't as they hoped for.

VJ really is a microcosm iof the immigrating community at large....we don't get to know all the happy endings, just as only a small portion of the bad stories are posted on VJ.

Call me crazy but I think before you MARRY someone and vow to spend the rest of your natural life on planet Earth with them, you better KNOW in the bottom of your heart that this is the right person.

Call me crazy, but I think before you COMMENT on someone's thread, you better KNOW more about it than a few lines in the original post of the OP.

[Peace be still 6]

I find it strange that you married a relative, and then he dumps you?? There is a code of honor with (MENA) distance relatives marrying each other. Your parents? are from Pakistan, and yet he treats this way? Something doesn't seem right. I think this is a MENA man that is married to a non Muslim Woman that plans on coming to the states without letting his wife know. And you want to see if you can get away with it so that is why you posted this BS to get information. CARMA IS A (you know what), and curses will follow you all the days of your life if you do this evil thing to someone that gave you their heart.

[Kanja 201]

I find it strange that you married a relative, and then he dumps you?? There is a code of honor with (MENA) distance relatives marrying each other. Your parents? are from Pakistan, and yet he treats this way? Something doesn't seem right. I think this is a MENA man that is married to a non Muslim Woman that plans on coming to the states without letting his wife know. And you want to see if you can get away with it so that is why you posted this BS to get information. CARMA IS A (you know what), and curses will follow you all the days of your life if you do this evil thing to someone that gave you their heart.

I dont understand why people feel the need to give their two cents about an issue that was not presented... either you give an opinion on the topic or you move on, even if the OP is an "imposter" the advice could help someone else that may be in a similar situation

OP....from reading what you wrote I have to agree, you just have to move on with your life

[Dr. A ♥ O 203]

M4E has a very scary and valid point though. If someone applied for a K3 and their spouse qualifies for an IR-1 after being married for 2 years and they've had the interview and were approved for a K3 can they get an IR-1 at POE like some threads I read and do exactly as what is suggested was done to sofee? Further more can the petition still be revoked after the approval for the visa if the intending immigrant hasn't received it from the Embassy yet?

Edited September 8, 2009 by ~Flower~

[Dr. A ♥ O 203]

Sorry I meant M4L.

[bhajishah 4]

Oh he is a conservative little thief and liar. stold the green card on your back. If he so damn conservative why did he come to USA then. turn him to DHS they will track his butt in no time. (count on it)!!

[bhajishah 4]

I believe her, Ive seen what they expect ofd thier Pakistani wives, they not as spoiled as Egyptian wives. MOre compassion and understanding toward Gori white wives. These 2nd generation usa Pakistani decent ladies ahve thier hands full with expectations to behave like they just got off the boat themselves. Also its easy for these guys to go back and tell tier families, oh she not respectful, blame it on the culture of USa yada. Fault is much easier found in woman than man esp if its THIER good son. case in point, arranged marriages are not needed, wanted and so on. esp if its cross borders. my 2cents. Im sure she not imposter.

[bhajishah 4]

I believe her, Ive seen what they expect ofd thier Pakistani wives, they not as spoiled as Egyptian wives. MOre compassion and understanding toward Gori white wives. These 2nd generation usa Pakistani decent ladies ahve thier hands full with expectations to behave like they just got off the boat themselves. Also its easy for these guys to go back and tell tier families, oh she not respectful, blame it on the culture of USa yada. Fault is much easier found in woman than man esp if its THIER good son. case in point, arranged marriages are not needed, wanted and so on. esp if its cross borders. my 2cents. Im sure she not imposter.