I'm back and have more questions..

[LaL 418]

Organizers are not mods.

[Ban Hammer 12,835]

Organizers are not mods.

unless she's saying mags/william/jenn/kim did something over there.

[LaL 418]

Organizers are not mods.

unless she's saying mags/william/jenn/kim did something over there.

Maybe, but I doubt it. This expats injection was just more drama through PM (on VJ!) being brought up.

what i'm referring to concerning me, has all been said on VJ to me.

Edited January 9, 2009 by LaL

[MrsAmera 41]

My_Mohammed,

I really wish you the best of luck with your journey. I think that several of us did try to offer you genuine advice (those of us that have been through it) however the advice we gave was not (IMO) what you wanted to hear and you became upset in your thread here (http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=169651&st=0), because it seemed what we said was not what you were looking for. In the end you will make the decision that seems best for your case and the CO will be left to determine whether he/she believes your evidence to be genuine. I have been here for several years and from what I've seen, while I don't have access to your PM's, no one was singling you out or ridiculing you. As someone else stated this is a public message board and it is best not to let the things that are said really bother you.

[My Mohammed 2]

Very interesting post. I do see a bit of biting going on now-and-again but doesn't that always happen between sisters and brothers? That's what we are here is a big ole dysfunctional family so we do have arguments and mud slinging but we understand that that comes with the territory of remaining in a forum for an extended period of time and getting to know each member on a personal level.

As to the comment about not being a real muslim if we post on this board... that one kind of pierced a little bit. I'm a muslim and I do my best to bring joy and happiness to people who are struggling to get through a day without crying. I am through wth our journey for now but still come here to support the friends I have made and possibly meet new people going through what I went through. I don't feel that that makes me any "less" muslim. I think it shows that I truely do love my friends (and yes, even enemies) to the fullest and am ready to help them whenever they need a hand and that is a sign of a good muslim imho.

the expats group...I don't venture there often so I don't care what is being said about me. Stuff is going to be said about EVERYONE no matter how well they're liked or how much they're disliked. I'm sure I have my fair share of enemies that say hateful nasty things about me but I really don't care. They go there to vent and that's ok with me. Whatever makes them feel better, then I say go right on ahead. Don't worry about that group

We did, at one time, have a big falling out about fat, ugly, and older women with the young mena men. Yeah it pierced some of the members pretty deeply and did so for quite some time. I really don't see much of that going on in here anymore unless it is in a thread that the discussion is actually about red flags and things the consulate might find against the relationship OR a thread letting us know how things turned out for the worst . We are a forum of people who just want to be happy with our SO's and need/needed advice at some point on what to do to get them here. We have the good happy threads and we have the break-up threads. We feel it is important to show both sides of the story so that any newer members may be reminded to sit back and think about what they're doing before they make this very very life altering journey.

We aren't saying that ALL mena men are bad. As a matter of fact, I'm sure that if the mena group members were actually, I don't know, the russian group or something....the threads would be exactly the same with the warnings for fraud and all that because that is just the way this group of women are. They care about what happens to each other so they try to help others BEFORE the trouble hits so that their lives aren't ripped to shreds by the man they thought was prince charming.

I love my mena man with all my heart but thanks to VJ I'm aware of the possibilities that certain things may take place. This has helped me to put my relationship into perspective a bit and actually strengthened it a lot. I really hope it has helped others the way it has helped me

I hope that you find some good while sifting through the mena forums and see that we are truely a wonderful bunch of people who commune on a daily basis and care a lot for each other. This means that nasty things will be said and feelings will get hurt but as afore stated, that happens in every family. I wish that you find a place here to settle in and feel safe to ask any questions ou may have. I, for one, am ready to help whenever you may need.

amal

I just want you to know that I didn't make the comment about Muslims, it's was my SO. I don't even try to say, I know how a Muslim should act as i'm not one. Because my SO is, I tend to listen and believe what he tells me. I also have done much reading myself to satisfy my own curiosity and I know some of what i'm seeing on here is not the norm. I understand what he meant and for him it's how he feels and how he sees a Muslim woman should be. I didn't mean ALL Muslim women nor did I say ALL. So I don't want all Muslim women on here to think I meant them.

Yes, i'm sure i'll find the good i'm searching for as not everyone is bad and some I feel truly mean well. And from the bottom of my heart, no matter what my relationship brings, I hope all succeed and can come back years later and share their sucess stories. I might be one who reads them and wish it were me, but if it is.. i'll take what I learned from my experience and move on, as I would if it were with a good ole American man.

[Donna A 4]

just wait until u say something here on vj that no one likes and see if u dont get bashed here too. i got gang banged alot.

also i havent seen any bashing of the origional poster either over there. this was all news to me when i read it. i wondered what i missed.

Edited January 9, 2009 by Donna A

[My Mohammed 2]

in short, if it's an expats issue, discuss it on expats. if vj, discuss it on vj. don't transfer the drama from one site to another.

I have not seen anything posted about this member on expats.

according to the op, there has been - last sentence of first paragraph.

"I know those of you who know i'm referring to you, will run off to your little group on.. expactgroups.com and proceed to make fun and belittle me as you do others on VJ".

Charles, where did I say in that quote they had said anything about me? I said, I know they would do me as they do others, didn't I?

[amal 4]

I just want you to know that I didn't make the comment about Muslims, it's was my SO. I don't even try to say, I know how a Muslim should act as i'm not one. Because my SO is, I tend to listen and believe what he tells me. I also have done much reading myself to satisfy my own curiosity and I know some of what i'm seeing on here is not the norm. I understand what he meant and for him it's how he feels and how he sees a Muslim woman should be. I didn't mean ALL Muslim women nor did I say ALL. So I don't want all Muslim women on here to think I meant them.

oh, I knew it was ur SO that said that. I realized u didn't mean every individual but I just felt like stating my thoughts on it it wasn't anything against you at all

[My Mohammed 2]

Organizers are not mods.

unless she's saying mags/william/jenn/kim did something over there.

Uhhh. no i'm not saying any such thing. I didn't mean to say Mods..as I think the most helpful person has been, Kim. Sorry I made another mistake, but I meant you, charles. I guess you're just an organizer, correct?

[Sandrila 1]

[star_dragon 0]

My_Mohammed,

I really wish you the best of luck with your journey. I think that several of us did try to offer you genuine advice (those of us that have been through it) however the advice we gave was not (IMO) what you wanted to hear and you became upset in your thread here (http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=169651&st=0), because it seemed what we said was not what you were looking for. In the end you will make the decision that seems best for your case and the CO will be left to determine whether he/she believes your evidence to be genuine. I have been here for several years and from what I've seen, while I don't have access to your PM's, no one was singling you out or ridiculing you. As someone else stated this is a public message board and it is best not to let the things that are said really bother you.

[Y's_habibitk 2]

This is not going to end well.

My Moh,

As I said, there are some good people on this forum.

Choose to ignore those that arent and if you let people get under your skin, they win right? Taking the time to post all of this and vent is time away from your happiness. They(the ones that upset you ?) arent suffering and are not effected by this. Don't let people rent free space in your head It's not worth it.

Thats my two cents

Now:

"the other site"

As long as it doesnt spill into VJ, who gives a sh!t anymore. As long as no one comes over here after a link was posted to bait/antogonize or otherwise, let them have their kicks n giggles.

It's like anything... someone doesnt like what you said, they will find someone to talk/make fun of, or whatever about it. It happens everywhere, in every setting. Some enjoy it more than others, sadly.

The only issue I have is when it comes over here for no apparent reason. Which seems to have halted lately.

I hate seeing people get riled up over things like this(i have been one of those people, so i know )

Lisa

Edited January 9, 2009 by Y_habibitk

[My Mohammed 2]

My_Mohammed,

I really wish you the best of luck with your journey. I think that several of us did try to offer you genuine advice (those of us that have been through it) however the advice we gave was not (IMO) what you wanted to hear and you became upset in your thread here (http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=169651&st=0), because it seemed what we said was not what you were looking for. In the end you will make the decision that seems best for your case and the CO will be left to determine whether he/she believes your evidence to be genuine. I have been here for several years and from what I've seen, while I don't have access to your PM's, no one was singling you out or ridiculing you. As someone else stated this is a public message board and it is best not to let the things that are said really bother you.

No, I never became upset about anything I was told. When I was told something, I questioned whether the CO in EGYPT only would question it and if so, how did those ahead of me deal with it. But when I sensed my thread and what I wrote was going somewhere it shouldnt.. I chose to forget it. Do I give a fig what anyone thinks of me? NO... What I do give a fig about is getting the help to questions w/o being made to feel my whole relationship is a scam.. which is exactly where that thread was headed.

Also, no where have I said in any post that EVERYONE who resonded to me was not offering their genuine advice. I can tell by a post who's sincere and who's not. Yes, this is a public forum , but I hope we are all adults and not children seeking visas. I also wish you the best on the rest of your journey.

[SaadBell 0]

Not sure what happened and who said what, but honestly don’t give it a second thought. As far as being tricked, that can happen to anyone at anytime, and you don’t have to find a foreigner to enjoy heartbreak and pain, that can be found right here if you look. No one knows the future, you could marry the boy next door, one that you have known your whole life and find that the person you thought you knew is burying bodies in the back yard. So do people get tricked oh yea, does it happen only to women who marry middle eastern men, NO, scamming is an equal opportunity that appeals to people with no morals.

There are more nice people on here than mean people, so just let it go, use the forum for what you need, information. If you ever need someone to talk to I can promise you I am not one to judge, how I can, I have done some really stupid things in my life and this taught me that anyone can be fooled. Fraud is universal and all you can do is do your best, and enjoy the ride. I always think that if you have bad experiences this can help with a number one book, which I need to write one day. I know this sounds simple, but I read a lot, and this seems to help me with my life, I love true life stories and it gives one perspective on my own life. I have never read a book about someone who did amazing things with their life that didn’t have a time or times when they were struggling or going through some major life crisis, this is where you learn things about yourself.

As far as someone coming back and telling us a bad experience they have been though, I think that is important, first they can get some support, and also we can learn from their experience, you can always learn something from everyone you meet. This is also with someone coming back with a great experience.

[star_dragon 0]

]

No, I never became upset about anything I was told. When I was told something, I questioned whether the CO in EGYPT only would question it and if so, how did those ahead of me deal with it. But when I sensed my thread and what I wrote was going somewhere it shouldnt.. I chose to forget it. Do I give a fig what anyone thinks of me? NO... What I do give a fig about is getting the help to questions w/o being made to feel my whole relationship is a scam.. which is exactly where that thread was headed.

Also, no where have I said in any post that EVERYONE who resonded to me was not offering their genuine advice. I can tell by a post who's sincere and who's not. Yes, this is a public forum , but I hope we are all adults and not children seeking visas. I also wish you the best on the rest of your journey.

I don't recall ANYONE replying on your thread suggesting that your relationship was a scam. I don't think I've ever seen anyone here in the MENA forums suggest that someone else's MENA relationship was a scam (not in the little time I've been here anyway) You were the one suggesting that evidences could be seen as fabricated. You asked what evidences you thought were sufficient and we told you what we've used in our interviews. You were the one saying "well I've heard that pictures can be seen as fabricated". Same with notarized letters from family and friends.