Restored!

[maliciant 7]

The God thing: I wish I could explain why it bothered me in just a few words, but I can't. I should have let it go. Please accept my apology.... I really sorry.

I'll help you with that, why do all the used car salesmen brag about how honest they are? Because they are extremely dishonest. Why do the religious zealots spend so much praising god and putting their religion out there, it's because they feel guilty about their behavior and are trying to compensate. Honest people don't have to tell you how honest they are, and good people don't have to tell you they really are good, it's self evident, it's not a special occassion, it's just how they are, all the time.

There is a huge difference between being very religious and posting praise the lord and it's in the lords hands at least once a paragraph, one persion comes off as religious, the other comes off as hiding/compensating for something.

[Old Dominion 26]

Much to my dismay, this Dr. Jeff Owens is an intolerant, gay-bashing fundamentalist and proud of it. He is excessively judgmental and preaches against such things as Mohawk hair cuts (they are a sign of being a transvestite), a guy who wears his hair long, or has ear piercings, differing shoe styles, public displays of affection, young women who wear shorts in public, and among other things regards it as sinful if a woman wears a mini-skirt (and especially sinful if she is overweight). Non-comformists are not welcome in his world; they are wicked and heathen-loving. My viewpoint comes from hearing one of his recent sermons. He "sells" his intolerance on CDs, available through his own store, and through his preaching engagements. I would not like to be in a marriage that is overshadowed by the judgmentalism of that type of "Christianity."

[melusine 5]

Oops. I didn't wanted to start all of a discussion about religion, sorry for that. It just hit me when I couldn't understand one of Valsu's post that was filled up with religious turned sentences... it just got very confusing (And I've been raised Christian, believe it or not).

I just want to know when is the hearing ??

[DEDixon 39]

Valsu,

I hope that evrything works the best for your kids your wife and you.

Each family has different ways to deal with crisis, I hope you find the best way to solve your problems.

Now I have a question, I have a friend who came to the US and got married, in this case my friend and her husband are big procastinating, she will be out of status soon (or she is maybe).

Did your wife had any document with her when she was detained? Was that of any help when she was "detained"?

My friend does not have a rush to start working but I have been telling her is not the only important reason to adjust her status.

What were your wife's rights being married but not having started AOS?

What is ICE asking you to do for to let her go back home?

ok 4 questions

Valsu said:

Unfortunately, ICE picked her up on 12/04/2008. Where they found her, or why they picked her up, I have no idea. What I do know is that they put her in a prison for 5 days, and then moved her to a Detention and Removal Prison, where she awaits trial for deportation.

Value said:

Ok, I spoke with the officer handling her case.

She said that she has applied for a bond date, and would have a chance to get a bid bond some time next week.

She suggested I be there for the hearing before the judge.

She also said that when it goes to trial in two months, she can obtain a trial for her adjustment of status, and can actually get it for free before the judge. If denied, she'll be deported.

Which means I will need to be there for that and try to bring proof of our bona fida marriage.

The complication is that she has been outside of my home for more than 30 days, and is still saying that everything that is happening to her is my fault.

Border Control picked her up at a bus station.

Valsu said:

She is still "Out of Status," and has overstayed 7 months.

She was picked up two states away at a bus station.

Even if she had documents with her, it wouldn't matter. She is out of status. Documents would only serve to prove further that she was out of status.

They have the "right" to fight her detention and deportation. I think they are at the mercy of a judge at the bond hearing that is scheduled. Ultimately, the judge could schedule her to be deported, but deportation can be delayed if Valsu or even his wife decides to fight it. If the judge allows her to stay after this soon to be hearing, they are lucky, but they likely still need a lawyer. Basically this situation seems a recipe for a legal fight that will cost a lot of time and money.

Oops. I didn't wanted to start all of a discussion about religion, sorry for that. It just hit me when I couldn't understand one of Valsu's post that was filled up with religious turned sentences... it just got very confusing (And I've been raised Christian, believe it or not).

I just want to know when is the hearing ??

Be too and sorry for jumping on you like I did.

[Kiv 32]

Thanks DEDixon,

The sumary is great ...I was lost when reading.

I guess I will send the whole story to my friends so they know what can happen if they just keep waiting.

[Valsu 1]

Valsu,

I hope that evrything works the best for your kids your wife and you.

Each family has different ways to deal with crisis, I hope you find the best way to solve your problems.

Now I have a question, I have a friend who came to the US and got married, in this case my friend and her husband are big procastinating, she will be out of status soon (or she is maybe).

Did your wife had any document with her when she was detained? Was that of any help when she was "detained"?

My friend does not have a rush to start working but I have been telling her is not the only important reason to adjust her status.

What were your wife's rights being married but not having started AOS?

What is ICE asking you to do for to let her go back home?

ok 4 questions

You won't like my answer, but I spoke with the actual Border Patrol Officer who arrested my wife.

He made some very challenging statements, and said that the previous approval processes are run by the department of state. He said, "they (the DoS) don't truly know how we (Border Patrol) operate, and he said he doesn't care what stages in the process anyone is. If they find someone in possession of an out of status visa/passport, they are going to arrest them immediately and place them in prison the same way they did my wife. Whether they get themselves out of prison is their problem."

When I was at the prison visiting my wife, the guards told me that many of the people in the facility were actually legal--many just caught without papers, or such--most just "out of status" as they call it. One mexican lady was even voluntarily leaving the country back to Mexico, and 25 miles from the border, her bus was pulled over and raided by border patrol, and they carried her back to prison--where she's been for 3 months now awaiting a deportation hearing--even though she had a ticket back to Mexico and was leaving voluntarily.

After learning about everything outside of what USCIS tells us, I will advise you this:

NO! DO NOT SPEND ANY MOMENT PROCRASTINATING! Plead with your friends! Go give them some money, print the forms for them, do whatever you can to get their process going right away.

Don't listen to ANYONE that says it is safe to be in this country out of status. It's a misguidance, and your immigrant spouse is NOT safe. If a member of border patrol checks his/her papers, they're going to spend 1-4 months in prison, and there's no way around it--even if they've already applied for AOS and don't have proof on them of having done so.

The $1,010 you couldn't afford before, will become $8,000+ in legal and attorney fees.

Wish I would have known this prior. We would have simply waited another 4-6 months before bringing her to the country. Instead, we wanted to be together and took a financial risk we could not afford "thinking" we would be safe while "Out of Status." Now my wife is in prison, and it's going to take a miracle of God to get her out before Christmas. Border Patrol told me that to them "Out of Status" is just another term for ILLEGAL and will lead to arrest.

The ####### that goes on in our country makes me want to find another country to live in, seriously.

Especially after meeting so many innocent men and women in that prison. Poor people caged up like animals just because of paperwork flaws. Some of them even had walking chains--how sad.

[Valsu 1]

Much to my dismay, this Dr. Jeff Owens is an intolerant, gay-bashing fundamentalist and proud of it. He is excessively judgmental and preaches against such things as Mohawk hair cuts (they are a sign of being a transvestite), a guy who wears his hair long, or has ear piercings, differing shoe styles, public displays of affection, young women who wear shorts in public, and among other things regards it as sinful if a woman wears a mini-skirt (and especially sinful if she is overweight). Non-comformists are not welcome in his world; they are wicked and heathen-loving. My viewpoint comes from hearing one of his recent sermons. He "sells" his intolerance on CDs, available through his own store, and through his preaching engagements. I would not like to be in a marriage that is overshadowed by the judgmentalism of that type of "Christianity."

Dr. Jeff Owens is certainly a fundamentalist, but the messages he preaches regarding specific things as you mentioned above are sermons to his personal Sunday School Classes and students at his College. I'm assuming you listened to one of the free sermons on his website.

You are welcomed to listen to those things if you wish to partake in the fundamentals of an independent baptist, and increase your personal convictions between you and God.

The materials I'm talking about are his Marriage Counseling messages, which have nothing to do with the things you mentioned above. The marriage counseling messages are very down to earth, and shows how much love that fundamental man has for married couples and the family. If you wish to help your marriage, I recommend listening to someone who knows how to fix one. That's man's reputation preceeds him, as he's saved literally thousands of marriages and coaches married couples daily, still.

Have fun! Time for work.

[Kajikit 65]

Well, I really hope it works out for you...

If there's one thing I've learned about immigration it's that you can't afford NOT to do exactly what the authorities tell you to - if they want you to stand on your head in the corner and sing hallellujah sixteen times, the only thing to ask is 'how loud'? Sure the bureaucracy is tedious, expensive, and confusing... but the alternative isn't something anyone wants. My friend 'couldn't afford' to repeat her medical so she didn't do it - and of course they denied her application for AOS and she had three months to leave the country (she did). They told me I had to repeat mine, and thought it was a stupid request but we did it anyway, and I was approved. End result - she's living in France with her daughter, and I'm in Florida with my husband.

[himher 634]

Ima repeat what I said on the last discussion - and I don't care how many moderators <cough>kimandruss<cough> say otherwise.

She was out of status on the day her I94 expired. She needed to keep her status here, and didn't get to. "K1/married within 90 days" is NOT legal status no matter how many VJ members line up behind this guy and explain their delay in following the immigration path. Present in the US with valid I94 is legal status. "Pending AOS" with expired I94 is legal status. I would politely advise moderators to point that out when "we married within the 90 days but delayed AOS and we were OK" gets posted as a legal or alternate immigration path. I would politely advise K1 petition applicants to plan to follow through on their spouses visa journeys - AOS is a required step, not an optional step, in the immigration process.

The K1 path is clearly outlined, here on VJ, on the USCIS website, on other sites. Petition, interview, EAD/AOS, lift conditions, citizenship. In order to keep status here in the US, that is the path that needs to be followed. VJ (and no other site that I know of) does not exist to provide advice or input on "alternate paths".

We (USC's) OWE our beneficiaries the action of following through on maintaining status. No matter what. These visas are not and were never meant to be "try it before you buy it" free passes to screw up someone's life. It's part of the legal immigration path. Period and Not Optional. It's as important as the romantic visits, phone calls, wedding plans, and everything else we somehow manage to get done to get the visa and to get our SO's to the US. There is too much dependence on the "forgiveness time" that is allowed for visaholders giving justification to procrastinate between steps. After all, we got what we want, right? It's sometimes easy to forget that this is a basic need of the beneficiary while at the same time we enjoy their company here at home. Expired I-94? No AOS pending? In the eyes of the law your beneficiary is illegally present and the consequences are no different (even if the options to fight the consequences are) than if the beneficiary had entered and stayed under any other illegal status.

As far as the religious thing goes - my personal conclusions were drawn with this post when the offer to continue to illegally work, cleaning the church for private school tuition credits for Valsu's children, which somehow would have resulted in AOS funding, was turned down. This is an exact copy of said post:

It's not working for free at all. View this logically for a moment.

If I have $330 set aside in my budget for private school, and I spend $330/mo for this school, then I am losing $330/mo.

Now, if my wife was to volunteer work at the school (which entailed vacuuming a few hours a day, three days a week), and allow our children to attend tuition free, then here's what happens to my budget:

We no longer spend the $330/mo negative transaction. In addition, we now have an additional $330 in our budget that we did not anticipate having, meaning we can save $330/mo.

Technically, that is the same as making $660/mo, because you are no longer spending $330, and are instead saving $330.

She would have invest 9 hours a week on average. That is 39 hours per month on average. $330 for 39 hours a month is $8.46/hr. If you consider the savings we'd get because of it, at $660 for 39 hours, she is, in reality, earning $16.92/hr.

I have over 140 housekeeping employees in my company, and 95% of them do not make that much.

If she had taken that opportunity, we would have saved an additional $990 in just three months. I am quite positive I could have come up with the other $20 for her AOS/EAD.

She shot herself in the foot by turning that offer down. That was our break, and she spit on it. Why? Because deep down, she still blamed working at the church on her miscarriage, and she couldn't face doing the same work again.

Now that you see the logical side of it, you'll perhaps understand how I saw it from my perspective.

[zqt3344 21]

What have you been smoking? or drinking? Hallo? The only reason this person you brought to the USA that is now sitting in jail is so accomodating and compliant with communicating to you and not wanting you to leave her IS BECAUSE SHE IS IN JAIL! AND SHE KNOWS HER FRIDAY FREE RIDE IN THE USA IS OVER! Do yourself a favor and end this madness and let her go back now. If you or her let her status expire knowingly(then how could you love her or care for her when you put her status and life in jeopardy like this-totally illogical), then why are you crying around like this, you broke the law, you knew what could happen, we all know, we all have to follow the USA immigration laws or else pay the piper, in your case ICE and the Border Patrol. This is one of the most insane posts I have ever read on here!

Well, praise the Lord!

I finally got to see my prodical wife face to face today for almost 2 hours, and it was amazing. She was amazing!

The guards at the facility are extremely nice and accommodating, and let us spend much more time than we were initially allowed since there were no other visitors.

We managed to discuss all of our issues, and worked out the obvious former pains within our marriage. I do not think we've ever had a face to face discussion quite like that--and so much needed! We both left our conversation fulfilled, excited to see each other, and not wanting to leave each other's presence.

I thank my God in heaven for giving us the grace to start building a restored marriage after all we've been through.

There are so many negative threads in this section of the forums, but I am grateful that I can finally post a positive one.

A "Positive" Effect of Major family Changes!

I will get to see her again tomorrow also, and will be able to rescue her from the clutches of ICE next week soon as her bail hearing concludes.

We have a lot of work ahead of us, and it will take a commitment from us both.

Please pray for us for while we endure immigration at a greater degree now.

Our information here will always be kept anonymous, so you'll never know who we were. Those of you who were concerned about that before, don't be. Out of 8 billion people, why does it matter? Surely something said in my threads has been of assistance to someone over the past few weeks, in spite of some of the negativity that certain individuals could not help themselves from proclaiming. Once my wife comes home, we'll only post here if we're doing so together, and quite possibly on our main account again.

Just know that God still answers prayer. He can take what we destroyed as imperfect humans, and create something beautiful out of it to His glory.

Don't forget, one of the greatest lessons I've learned is that marriage is not a 50/50 partnership; but rather, it is a 100/100 united commitment. Give it your all, and don't be so quick to give up and quit--there's still hope for light, no matter how dark the day, if you trust in God.

Our Lord be praised!

Edited December 16, 2008 by zqt3344

[bhajishah 4]

Good pull, If one cant use immigration status to manipulate, one can always use Jesus!(note to self)Maybe jail if she on the run. hmmm wonder how they got tipped off that she on the run.

[justashooter 430]

Well, praise the Lord!

I finally got to see my prodical wife face to face today for almost 2 hours, and it was amazing. She was amazing!

Our Lord be praised!

This is better than General Hospital was in the 80's.

BTW, it's prodigal, and i'm not buying it.

[zqt3344 21]

I agree, one minute you read it you feel so sorry for this poor US guy, then you feel sorry for this poor K1 woman then the kids then the mother then all involved then it twists and turns and it has got to be one of the most incredibly insane posts on here I have ever read!

Well, praise the Lord!

I finally got to see my prodical wife face to face today for almost 2 hours, and it was amazing. She was amazing!

Our Lord be praised!

This is better than General Hospital was in the 80's.

BTW, it's prodigal, and i'm not buying it.

[justashooter 430]

God is a very big part of some people's lives and your comment is an attempt to undermined what others value.

god is a cognitive construct that people substitute for self actualisation in order to keep their lives under control.

unfortunately, this construct often fails, for example, everything we have read the OP say about his life, which is in a total shambles.

god won't take care of you, buddy. it's time to "man up" or go under.

[zqt3344 21]

Guys and Gals, I think this is a sham poster, this Valsu and someone just pulling all our legs. Later!

God is a very big part of some people's lives and your comment is an attempt to undermined what others value.

god is a cognitive construct that people substitute for self actualisation in order to keep their lives under control.

unfortunately, this construct often fails, for example, everything we have read the OP say about his life, which is in a total shambles.

god won't take care of you, buddy. it's time to "man up" or go under.