stateside honor killings

[HLM 1]

I'm in shock and pain!!! my heart feels like it was punched so hard!! I'm so sorry Tamara... but I'm happy that you ended up with amazing parents who made you who you are today! I'll never forget this story....Thnx for sharing.

[~PalmTreeGurl~ 154]

so back to the honor killing ... any MENA men giving any opinions?

Since its said to be more cultural to do honor killings... I want to know what the Mens opinions are about this matter of honor killings?? would it be something ever considered if faced with a daughter dating outside the parents religion or who they married or how they dishonored you as a father? Im up for listening to the mens opinions from the MENA group.

[SaadBell 0]

This would be me, if my husband touch one hair on any of our childrens heads

[~*Dorothy*~ 2]

Tamara - thank you for sharing your story and for speaking out

[SaadBell 0]

So long as little children are allowed to suffer, there is no true love in this world.

Isodore Duncan

[Imua 0]

Honor killings are not limited to Muslims, or MENA - there was a TV documentary about this case a couple of months ago and I could not forget it - I know what it feels like to be hated by my SO's parents because of things beyond my control and his father was a retired cop so he would have definitely had the connections to get me out of his life like this poor girl...

Mom gave long-distance order for honor killing, police say

By DeNeen L. Brown and Rama Lakshmi, Washington Post | October 5, 2003

VANCOUVER, British Columbia -- In the cold end, it was her own mother who gave the final order to cut the young woman's throat. That's what police in India say.

They say the mother, an upstanding woman in Vancouver's Punjabi community, spoke into her cellphone across an ocean and told the men, "Kill her." And with the order -- with the death of Jaswinder Kaur Sidhu, a beautiful 25-year-old Indian Canadian woman known as Jassi -- the family's honor was restored, police say.

Indian police have issued arrest warrants and sought the extradition of the mother, Malkit Kaur Sidhu, and the mother's brother, Surjit Singh Badesha. Two years after the request, Sidhu and Badesha have been neither arrested nor extradited. Through lawyers, the two have denied the charges.

"We don't anticipate any criminal charges any time soon," said Corporal Rhonda Stoner of the Ridge-Meadows Royal Canadian Mounted Police. "You have to have direct evidence and witnesses to testify and evidence to substantiate a criminal charge. . . . We don't have that."

Despite all the trappings of this North American culture, with its human rights laws and politically powerful women, police and cultural experts say Jassi became caught in the wrath of her powerful Jat Sikh family after she married a poor rickshaw driver without their permission. Although she lived in a suburb, worked at a mall, and had citizenship, police say, being Canadian could not save her from one of the most ancient cruelties still committed against women: honor killings.

The family, which moved to Canada in the 1970s, has said little publicly. Badesha, Jassi's uncle, told reporters that the family opposed the marriage because the husband was from Jassi's mother's village and has the same family name, which is said to be the same as marrying a family member.

"In our culture, this is not acceptable," he said. "But we did not kill her."

Like an ancient story of forbidden love, there is a rich family and a poor family, a sleeping potion, and a desperation between two people to be together.

Sukhwinder Singh Sidhu, nicknamed Mithoo, clings to memories of his first love. On an afternoon in December 1994 he first saw Jassi in the village of Jagraon, in northwest India.

"She had her cousin with her. I was alone," recalled Mithoo, speaking at his family's home in Konke Kalan, India.

"It was love at first sight," Mithoo said. "Not a word was said. Then I mustered enough courage and went up to her cousin, who I had seen in the village before." The cousin told Mithoo that Jassi was staying at her maternal uncle's house. "I didn't know she was from Canada then."

That night Mithoo looked up at the house of Jassi's uncle, the big house next door to his own. "Then she came out and stood on the terrace and looked toward me," he recalled.Continued...

http://www.boston.com/news/world/articles/...ing_police_say/

[mohamed N melinda 0]

thats very sad . may Allah have his mercy on thier souls ameen

first of all islam never order nor advise of honor of killing.

so many poeple kill thier famillies from different religions and nationalities .

it is not mean that muslim Egyptian man killed his 2 daughter that all muslims like that nor Egyptians . Islam is perfect Muslims arenot. when very few members in any groups do wrong thats not mean all the group are wrong . each group has bad and good

yes dating isnot accepted in islam . but after i watched the vedeos i see that both young girls isnot wearing hijabs. and they wear shorts and tight short clothes . that mean thier father didnot teach them islamically or didnot taech them islamic tradation. so it was his fault from the first . if he is that stritic muslim man so he should have teach them that and raise them on that not after them became 17&18 years he come to tell them no dating. sure it will be so hard for them as they see thier friends do that. if this man raise them and teach them right they will never have done that.

Allah give us life and noone should has the right to take it away but him

may Allah has his mercy on thier soul

[Ban Hammer 12,829]

thats very sad . may Allah have his mercy on thier souls ameen

first of all islam never order nor advise of honor of killing.

so many poeple kill thier famillies from different religions and nationalities .

it is not mean that muslim Egyptian man killed his 2 daughter that all muslims like that nor Egyptians . Islam is perfect Muslims arenot. when very few members in any groups do wrong thats not mean all the group are wrong . each group has bad and good

yes dating isnot accepted in islam . but after i watched the vedeos i see that both young girls isnot wearing hijabs. and they wear shorts and tight short clothes . that mean thier father didnot teach them islamically or didnot taech them islamic tradation. so it was his fault from the first . if he is that stritic muslim man so he should have teach them that and raise them on that not after them became 17&18 years he come to tell them no dating. sure it will be so hard for them as they see thier friends do that. if this man raise them and teach them right they will never have done that.

Allah give us life and noone should has the right to take it away but him

may Allah has his mercy on thier soul

they asked for it, right?

[nana_356 0]

thats very sad . may Allah have his mercy on thier souls ameen

first of all islam never order nor advise of honor of killing.

so many poeple kill thier famillies from different religions and nationalities .

it is not mean that muslim Egyptian man killed his 2 daughter that all muslims like that nor Egyptians . Islam is perfect Muslims arenot. when very few members in any groups do wrong thats not mean all the group are wrong . each group has bad and good

yes dating isnot accepted in islam . but after i watched the vedeos i see that both young girls isnot wearing hijabs. and they wear shorts and tight short clothes . that mean thier father didnot teach them islamically or didnot taech them islamic tradation. so it was his fault from the first . if he is that stritic muslim man so he should have teach them that and raise them on that not after them became 17&18 years he come to tell them no dating. sure it will be so hard for them as they see thier friends do that. if this man raise them and teach them right they will never have done that.

Allah give us life and noone should has the right to take it away but him

may Allah has his mercy on thier soul

Although I do agree with many of the things you stated. I do not agree with you saying that it is the fathers falt for not being stricter, and teaching them when they were younger. There are woman that went to my masjid, that wear a hijab (some do, some don't), and have lost their virginity, and have went to get their privates repaired by surgery. Parents can only do so much even if he had his girls wear their hijab since they were nine, that doesnt promise anything!!

Edited April 25, 2008 by nana_356

[♥JP♥ 5]

thats very sad . may Allah have his mercy on thier souls ameen

first of all islam never order nor advise of honor of killing.

so many poeple kill thier famillies from different religions and nationalities .

it is not mean that muslim Egyptian man killed his 2 daughter that all muslims like that nor Egyptians . Islam is perfect Muslims arenot. when very few members in any groups do wrong thats not mean all the group are wrong . each group has bad and good

yes dating isnot accepted in islam . but after i watched the vedeos i see that both young girls isnot wearing hijabs. and they wear shorts and tight short clothes . that mean thier father didnot teach them islamically or didnot taech them islamic tradation. so it was his fault from the first . if he is that stritic muslim man so he should have teach them that and raise them on that not after them became 17&18 years he come to tell them no dating. sure it will be so hard for them as they see thier friends do that. if this man raise them and teach them right they will never have done that.

Allah give us life and noone should has the right to take it away but him

may Allah has his mercy on thier soul

they asked for it, right?

I don't think thats what he meant. He is pointing out they the girls got used to an american lifestyle. The clothing they wore is not appropriate in an Islamic lifestyle. Had the father raised the girls according to Islamic beleifs, they wouldnt be dressed that way. Basically he is blaming the father for not raising them according to Islamic beliefs and then taking their lives because they dated a guy. If he raised them according to Islamic belief, they would have known that dating is not acceptable.

thats very sad . may Allah have his mercy on thier souls ameen

first of all islam never order nor advise of honor of killing.

so many poeple kill thier famillies from different religions and nationalities .

it is not mean that muslim Egyptian man killed his 2 daughter that all muslims like that nor Egyptians . Islam is perfect Muslims arenot. when very few members in any groups do wrong thats not mean all the group are wrong . each group has bad and good

yes dating isnot accepted in islam . but after i watched the vedeos i see that both young girls isnot wearing hijabs. and they wear shorts and tight short clothes . that mean thier father didnot teach them islamically or didnot taech them islamic tradation. so it was his fault from the first . if he is that stritic muslim man so he should have teach them that and raise them on that not after them became 17&18 years he come to tell them no dating. sure it will be so hard for them as they see thier friends do that. if this man raise them and teach them right they will never have done that.

Allah give us life and noone should has the right to take it away but him

may Allah has his mercy on thier soul

Although I do agree with many of the things you stated. I do not agree with you saying that it is the fathers falt for not being stricter, and teaching them when they were younger. There are woman that went to my masjid, that wear a hijab (some do, some don't), and have lost their virginity, and have went to get their privates repaired by surgery. Parents can only do so much even if he had his girls wear their hijab since they were nine, that doesnt promise anything!!

I completely agree. You can only do so much as a parent. Raise them according to your beliefs and hope it sitcks. However if you don't raise them according to your religious beliefs than you can't punish them for not obiding by rules that were never enforced.

[mohamed N melinda 0]

Although I do agree with many of the things you stated. I do not agree with you saying that it is the fathers falt for not being stricter, and teaching them when they were younger. There are woman that went to my masjid, that wear a hijab (some do, some don't), and have lost their virginity, and have went to get their privates repaired by surgery. Parents can only do so much even if he had his girls wear their hijab since they were nine, that doesnt promise anything!!

i agree with you that hijab wont prevent them to do wrong . as so many muslims women wear hijabs but still do wrong and hide it.

what i meant that he should have taught them all muslim manners and traditions and it was his fault that he didnot as it seem he was busy on them and wake too late when they are already older and hard to change. it depends totaly on the parents that they who taught thier kids whats the right from wrong.

[nana_356 0]

Alot of what I dont understand is why do some parents get so upset when their children adopt some western views. Isnt it nieve to expect your child to go to school with americans hang out with americans, but to still have the strict mena point of views???

[mohamed N melinda 0]

Alot of what I dont understand is why do some parents get so upset when their children adopt some western views. Isnt it nieve to expect your child to go to school with americans hang out with americans, but to still have the strict mena point of views???

it depend on what every person think and believe . to come to live in usa that not mean that we have to be thier belief. and through your manners and tradtions a way

[Aymerlu 3]

Although I do agree with many of the things you stated. I do not agree with you saying that it is the fathers falt for not being stricter, and teaching them when they were younger. There are woman that went to my masjid, that wear a hijab (some do, some don't), and have lost their virginity, and have went to get their privates repaired by surgery. Parents can only do so much even if he had his girls wear their hijab since they were nine, that doesnt promise anything!!

i agree with you that hijab wont prevent them to do wrong . as so many muslims women wear hijabs but still do wrong and hide it.

what i meant that he should have taught them all muslim manners and traditions and it was his fault that he didnot as it seem he was busy on them and wake too late when they are already older and hard to change. it depends totaly on the parents that they who taught thier kids whats the right from wrong.

Although parents can teach their children right from wrong, it does not mean their kids won't do something wrong. Everyone makes mistakes. It's normal and it's a part of life. My parents are awesome and were VERY STRICT with my brother and I growing up. What did that make me want to do???? Rebel, rebel, rebel which we both did. Did my parents still love us because we got a little crazy for a while? Did they ever think of killing us? Hell no.

Alot of what I dont understand is why do some parents get so upset when their children adopt some western views. Isnt it nieve to expect your child to go to school with americans hang out with americans, but to still have the strict mena point of views???

It's common sense. If you bring your children to a western country.....hello......like it or not western views and actions are gonna happen. If they don't want that to happen, better stay in their country.

[mohamed N melinda 0]

Although parents can teach their children right from wrong, it does not mean their kids won't do something wrong. Everyone makes mistakes. It's normal and it's a part of life. My parents are awesome and were VERY STRICT with my brother and I growing up. What did that make me want to do???? Rebel, rebel, rebel which we both did. Did my parents still love us because we got a little crazy for a while? Did they ever think of killing us? Hell no.

i agree with you in that . killing isnot an option for anything . and how someone kill someone he love