VanDerFran

My wife got mad at me one time because I paid for us to stay there one night on valentines day. It was about $125 night if i remember correctly because I want a room with a view of Davao.
She pretty much said you could have given me that money to go buy something at Abreza mall.
 
The hotel we usually stay in is across from Victoria mall, cheap and clean. I think we usuall pay around 1600 pesos a night. 

Good stuff, let me add the idea that a filipino kid raised in the middle of terrorists is not the same target as a white american with a bald head.   but u have good points. 

I agree
 
I don't see any scam going on either, I think she is just being overly cautious.  Which isn't a bad thing

I say live your life and live it well.
 
If it all goes wrong and she is hiding something and it all emerges once she gets her Green Card, the good people of VJ are always here to help.

I do understand what you are saying .. you love it on Mindanao, your roam the hills, you have a great time.   Whereas, with me, asawako absolutely refuses to go there .. .with or without me.  Heck there are areas around metro Manila she has off limits.
 
I have seen tons of red flag relationships (we both have, but I get the emails and PMs later, and still get them - "what should I do?"), this one doesn't jump out at me.  Now if she absolutely refused to bring her child and mother somewhere more "safe" to meet him ... then I would raise the monster red flag.
 
The Filipina works in metro Manila, so makes since to meet there.  She hasn't refused to allow him to meet her child or mother, just gets her back up in regards to going to Mindanao ... and you know rule #1 when in the Phils .. LISTEN to your fiancee/wife/girl friend.   
 
For now, NOPE, I am not jumping all over this one.

Good plan.   
 
Some are hinting that your fiancee has something to hide, which is why you have not met her daughter or mother,  whereas I think your fiancee is being typical Pinay that cares for her man.     Prove them all wrong ...   
 
Heck there are parts of metro Manila my wife still avoids.  The vast majority of the Philippines is wonderful and the people are wonderful ..     

I can find hotels within walking distance of Marco Polo for 800 peso per night, A&B hotel near China Town.  I also stay in Regency which is about 1400 peso per night and have huge beds and split fan Air cons, it right off JP Laurel street almost next to Gmall.   Seqouia hotel across street from A&B and it dirt cheap as well.
 
I have spent about 40 weeks in hotels in Davao City area in the last 10 + years.  I have checked out many a hotel there.
 
If you want the best deal on a money changer in Davao City go to Aldevinco Shopping Center, which super close to the Marco Polo, it's Muslim based but best rate on black market money changer.
 
 

I really don't want to see Davao to build up or modernize,  I don't want it to get expensive nor become a major hub for business.  I don't want to see prices rise or it get over crowded.  Davao had been kinda off the map, especially for foreigners since many considered it dangerous, but since Duterte became President I think many more people have started to explore and or move to Davao City.  
 
 

I used to hate Manila as well, I have grown to like it the past few trips.  Between Cebu, Davao and Manila I would move and live in Davao in a heartbeat.  I spent some time in Makati last trip and went to a mall called Greenhills, I really enjoyed Makita and the mall there, pretty cool and very nice and very clean.
 
I have started to grown fond of the Ermita area as well, it has great night life.  Cebu to me is starting replace Manila for me, It has been almost 5 years since I spent time in Cebu. I will have to revisit it and see what it is like now of days.  But Cebu was more dirty then Manila or at least the areas I stayed in was.

Get a room at the marco Polo, big tubs lol

When my fiance visited me, Martial Law was just declared. It did worry him and his family as I live just an hour away from Marawi. I felt bad that he was hesitant at first to come visit me in Mindanao but I tried to understand. I do not want him to feel uncomfortable even if I know I've never felt safer here until Martial law was declared. We ended up meeting in Manila and spending only 4 days in my hometown. Our sched was full (dinner with bestfriends, lunch with officemates, family activities-I have a big family). He regretted and felt bad that he only got to spend very few days with my fam.
 
But honestly, I would never want to go to Lanao or Marawi, considering that I am from Mindanao. My uncle was kidnapped in Marawi 3 years ago and we are not even rich. He just happen to work in a company and went there for a supposed business trip with the owner. They kept them both for more than a month until the owner paid ransom... ohh well so much for that
 ... The company i work with has to deal with NPA's too. So I would truly understand and maybe also think twice if I wanted to put my "foreigner" bf in that kind of risk. 
 
Maybe the problem will arise from Filipino interviewer. Being a Filipino he knows how tight families are here and if he finds out you haven't met them, especially the kid, after meeting her a couple of times, that may pose a red flag.

Give me a break, CDO is about 3 hours or so from the “scary” place your wife’s family is from. It’s totally safe in CDO, and a quick easy drive. Anyways, I’m sure if you don’t meet them your interview will probable be ok, but if the topic comes up about family you might have some explaining to do.

I love CDO, already have plans to retire there, it’s totally safe in my opinion. What some people don’t understand is that it is actually safe for the locals in the Philippines, but not always safe for foreigners. And in the Philippines it is very common for the grandmother/other family members to raise a child while the mother or father work abroad. 
 
With that said, I do think you should meet the children because in the end you will be supporting them and the whole family, so you might a well get to know them. 
 
 

I’ve been to Mindanao three times to visit my wife’s family, never once did I feel unsafe. If your talking the autonomous area then no it’s not safe, or southern islands of Mindanao. Most other places are very safe.

Honestly I really love it there it has a nice feel to it and the crime is really really low. I have never really gone out to the clubs/bars there at night due to my asawa not letting me so I can't attest to that but I am sure that @Chris Duffy can say something about that. But we plan on either building or buying a house either in Panabo or Tagum City, we are really looking at Tagum because it's right in the middle of my wife's family pretty much due to her having a very very large family. There is a good mixture of everybody there and it is starting to build up/modernize so we want in. 

Davao seems very western except for the general populace, very cosmopolitan city
 

Depending on the law in the country where the child is living, you may also need permission to take the child permanently out of the country, otherwise it is child abduction. We got a court order & other parent's permission to get "leave of jurisdiction" at the beginning of the visa process. Visas for children won't be issued in our country (UK) unless you have the correct court order. This can take 6 months here. 

Good stuff, let me add the idea that a filipino kid raised in the middle of terrorists is not the same target as a white american with a bald head.   but u have good points. 

Ohhh I know and alot of people are liking that as well on the ground. The only people not liking it are the activists and the people from outside Mindanao 

You would only fill out 1 I-129F. On it, you would list all children. Then, later on when it comes time for the interview, you would fill out the DS-160 for the mother a check the box that says the children will be done later (up to 1 year).
 
You do not fill out seperate I-129Fs. The I-129F is for a Fiance... and petitioning a child alone would not be a fiance. You are allowed to petition for the children at the same time as the fiance.
 
If you do not put the children on the I-129F at all, I think you would have to bring your fiance to to the US, get married, adjust status, and then file the I-130 to bring the children as a family member and all of that would take even longer (assuming the children do not age out of eligibility).

Former Marine here with Combat tours under my belt fyi. I was working overseas when I met my wife in Qatar, then I moved over to Afghanistan as contractor. But the first time I went to Mindanao I was really scared because my coworkers kept filling my head full of me being beheaded by Abu, they even had a over/under if I was going to come back at all. 
 
Needless to say I love it there in Davao and I hate Manila.

If she insist on me not to go to her city I will bring them to where she feel safe.. 
 

Yes you can do that. Just make sure you get a letter from mom giving you permission to travel with the child to the US. You might want to ask more what is needed for that part in the Philippines forum. 

I agree 100%!

Moderator hat off
 
Please be very careful, on VJ we have seen many threads with similar backgrounds. You already have doubts as you said you will not marry until you meet the boy and her mother. But you are still going to go through the interview and we all know full well that the excitement can cause a loss of good judgement. 
 
When you have this many members agreeing on the same thing it would be best to take a step back and look through the eyes of others. 
If you cannot visit the child and Grandmother at their home. Hire a PI to investigate, the money would be well spent for peace of mind.