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Terrorists Learn Harsh Lesson That If You Rape And Murder Women, The United Nations Will Give You Your Own Country And A Billion Dollars GAZA — Terrorists across the globe faced the bitter reality today that if they rape and murder hundreds of women, the United Nations will give them a country to operate and billions of dollars. "Today, we have put terrorists on notice," declared Secretary General António Guterres to the United Nations General Assembly. "Let it be known that the consequences of mass rape and murder will be swift, and in the form of cash." [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/terrorists-learn-harsh-lesson-that-if-you-rape-and-murder-women-the-united-nations-will-give-you-your-own-country-and-a-billion-dollars

Please read this whole thing and comment. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ U.S. Forced to Take Action As Hamas Continues Attacking Gaza Pier The U.S.-built temporary "humanitarian pier" on Gaza's Mediterranean coast — announced by President Joe Biden in his March State of the Union address and completed last week — has quickly turned into a chaotic, dangerous place. In addition to American troops injured in non-combat accidents, the pier is not moving aid to residents in the enclave at the level hyped by Pentagon officials. Earlier this week, the Department of Defense said that none of the hundreds of metric tons of aid delivered across the pier to Gaza had made it to Gazans. Even worse, the pier has been the target of attacks by terrorists in Gaza — and now defensive U.S. weapons are being activated to protect the floating aid delivery platform. [...] https://townhall.com/tipsheet/spencerbrown/2024/05/24/american-weapons-activated-to-defend-gaza-pier-as-hamas-continues-attacking-humanitarian-aid-deliveries-n2639456

Explains a lot, and not good for either Bidementia or Li'l Crackpipe. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Exclusive: Feds secretly knew for years Joe Biden met with son's Chinese partners on official trip [...] "They got to meet Dad. All very good. Talk later," Hunter Biden wrote in a December 2013 email confirming how he connected his Chinese associates with his father in a Beijing hotel after the vice president had met with Chinese President Xi Jinping. The younger Biden also bragged in his emails that his father was so enamored with China's communist leader that "I think they are in love with each other," the emails showed. [...] https://justthenews.com/accountability/political-ethics/feds-knew-2016-hunter-connected-his-chinese-business-partner-his

This is not at all good for Bidementia. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Americans Gripped By Intense Financial Stress As we wrap up the first five months of 2024, there is a glimmer of hope on the horizon. Americans' financial stress levels have shown a slight but significant improvement, easing from the recent high point of 67.5 recorded in 2023 to an average of 64.4 on the RealClearMarkets/TIPP Financial Stress Index. This is a positive shift, considering the average for 2023 was 67.5, and the highest recorded level was 68.4 in 2008. The chart below illustrates the average stress index for each year. However, the severity of the situation remains stark. Of the 35 demographic categories we track, 14 (40%) still experience elevated stress, 10% higher than their historical average. Further, all 35 groups are in the "stress zone," a clear indication that financial stress is not a localized problem but a widespread issue affecting all 35 groups, highlighting the urgency of the situation. [...] https://tippinsights.com/americans-gripped-by-intense-financial-stress/

Thrilling Saturday non-GS/ES report, see man: The heat index was over Many00 today, August in May man. While en route to the ES, Uncle T-B. called, call we man senior he man man. "I just looked at my bank statement and saw some suspicious charges, si man," said senior he man. We explained that two were charges from his tax CPA, services rendered man. Another was what he owed the IRS, far more income than last year thanks to us man. Another was his half-of-halfly estimated tax, si man. Uncle T-B. was mollified, thankfully man. Mama T-B. then called us to tell us that Uncle T-B. had called her about his bank statement, si man. We told her that we had talked with and mollified him, si man. Mama T-B. insisted on a blow-by-blow of what was asked and what was answered, man. After we GS/ES'd, we went to a large dollar store in search of something for Mama T-B., search we man. Senior she man wanted a half-of-half-gallon or a liter of bleach, want senior she man. (They have those in Mexico, man, but we could not have transported it, oh well man.) The dollar store* had none, but we found a few items for ourself, consolation man. *every product is $1 + Many (2x2x2x2x2 + 2+2+1) cents at minimum, some "dollar" store man We then tried to head for a nearby supermarket for bread that Mama T-B. wants only from there, si man. We were in gridlock for Many (2x2x2x2x2 + 2x2x2) minutes on one block, man. We finally turned around, relief man. Went to Aldi for several Two Guys Week items, prepare we man. Aldi was out of corn dogs, man! From there, went to Mama T-B.'s preferred market nearest us, relief man. We got the bread and found a satisfactory size of bleach there, son of a bleach man. We delivered this to Mama T-B., pleased senior she man man. Mama T-B. then wanted us to go to a Many'rd store for other items, man. We said that we would do so later, hot/tired/hungry we man. Returned to casa at Many p.m. to a demanding miu, Treat and Lunch me Daddy man. Serviced demanding miu, mollify miu we man. Breakfast/lunch was onecan of beef stew, ingest we man. A siesta was then taken, only one ignored phone call during same man. Awoke and headed for other market, give us a marketing degree for all this man. Had Many (2+1) -- si man, Many (2+1) -- phone caucuses with Mama T-B. while there, man. The first was at the closeout bakery rack, enumerate all items for senior she man's selection man. The second was at the regular clearance bins, more bakery goodies found there man. The Many'rd was to report that no vitamins matching Mama T-B.'s coupon were found, man. We went to self-checkout, hate it but faster than the one cashiered line man. Coupon for Mama T-B. wouldn't scan, no man. Idiot clerk said that product didn't match, "look at the picture man." We said that it matched exactly and we'd used the same coupon for the product before, si man. Idiot clerk went to check with supervisor, we man while everything was melting man. Other holdups occurred during this process, call same idiot clerk for each we man man. A 2-minute job turned into Many (2x2x2x2 +2+2) minutes, man. We were quite off-urinated by the end, needful to say man. At least Mama T-B. was not displeased, some solace man. Returned to casa to demanding miu, Treat and Din-Din me Daddy man. Serviced demanding miu, mollify miu we man. Din-din (ours) was a ham sandwich, indict it and ingest we man. Saw text from ex-Mrs.-T-B., see we man. "Can you take Mini-B. from Many a.m. to Many p.m. on Sunday while I attend this Ecu function, huh man?" we man. The reason we killed ourself today was to have a peaceful day of Two Guys Week prep, man. Of course we'll take Mini-B. while you sweat at this outdoor function all day, man. No party with the rubias again tonight, what else could go wrong today if we attempted absolutely anything else man. We are drowning our sorrows with use of our usual adult beverage, Powerade Zero grape flavor man.

Saturday GS/ES report, see man: We duly attended the GS and the ES itineraried for Saturday, dependable we man. The ES yielded the take, see man: -- "Mr. Coffee" pot = $2, steal man Total = $2

All short, mostly typical-looking Mexicanas, OK but yawn man. Average-to-frumpy, yawn man. We omit the irrelevant details, si and see an man. Now, our long-time dental hygienist is not just a fox, but a Many'th-Century Fox, wow man. However, she is common-law-married or similar, oh well man. We have not really seen too many foxes* down there, sorry man. *except some possible putas, but they're off-limits man

We and many, si and see and man! The important thing is that they were cheap, si man!

Link, see D ma'am: https://www.naturesmiracle.com/products/cat/litter-boxes-and-accessories/multi-cat-self-cleaning-litter-box.aspx

Live enough years and it'll happen naturally.

Polls Show Biden Still Has Sizable Lead Among Those Who Will Be Counting The Ballots [...] "For whatever reason, he just can't seem to gain traction with people counting the ballots," said political analyst Blake Rumsey of the Institute of Collecting Information. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/polls-show-biden-still-has-sizeable-lead-among-those-who-will-be-counting-the-ballots

'Go On, Git! Be Free! Get Outta Here!' Cries Blubbering Red Lobster Chef Throwing Rocks At Lobster Scurrying Off Into The Woods [...] "Go on! You're free now! What are you waiting for? Git!" cried the chef to an unmoving and unblinking lobster near the treeline behind the restaurant. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/go-on-git-be-free-get-outta-here-cries-blubbering-red-lobster-chef-throwing-rocks-at-lobster-scurrying-off-into-the-woods

Democrats Promise There's No Way A Person Who Entered The Country Illegally Would Ever Vote Illegally WASHINGTON, DC — Democrats assured the American people this week there's no way people who entered the country illegally would ever engage in other illegal activities like, say, voting. "Nope, these guys are just 'one and done' law-breakers," Representative Jamaal Bowman told the press. "There's no way they'd ever try to do anything else illegal like voting in an election. And anyway, our elections are air-tight. There's absolutely no way to vote illegally, except for the 30 ways I can think of right now off the top of my head…" [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/democrats-promise-theres-no-way-a-person-who-entered-the-country-illegally-is-likely-to-vote-illegally

This seems to cover all the alternatives, and not in happy fashion. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What's The Dems' Plan B If Lawfare Doesn't Stop Trump? We Have Some Ideas Next Tuesday both sides will present their closing arguments in the People of the State of New York v. Donald J. Trump, a case that exists for one reason only: to stop Trump from ever occupying the White House again. But what if this doesn't work? What if there's a hung jury or, worse yet, an acquittal? What if none of the 88 trumped-up felony charges results in a conviction and voters actually have a chance to elect Trump, should they prefer him over the decrepit failure known as Joe Biden? What is the Democrats' Plan B? They must have one. Democrats are nothing if not always prepared. And they've already made it clear that they will do anything to stop Trump. Anything, that is, except run on the issues. [...] https://issuesinsights.com/2024/05/24/whats-the-dems-plan-b-if-lawfare-doesnt-stop-trump-we-have-some-ideas/

Maybe USCIS chose the holiday weekend, with presumably slower traffic, to perform site-maintenance.

We know all the tricks already and merely apply them selectively, you inferior primate!

Thrilling Friday-on-Saturday non-GS/ES report, see man: Had bad overnight, awakening from Thursday's mosquito-bites, should've treated them man. We swear that one mosquito can smell us from a mile away, lifelong target we man. It then shouts to its buddies, "All-day buffet, si man!" sigh man. Spent approx. Many-&-a-half ([2+2] + half an hour) hours GS/ES-ing, dedicated we man. Showered and siesta'd afterward, both crucial man. Then retrieved Mini-B. for Two Guys eve, delayed this week man. Breakfast/lunch/din-din (after Many [2+2+1] p.m.) was Subway*, ingest Two Guys man. *bought WUOC, financially savvy we man We wanted to celebrate Mini-B.'s graduation from Many'th grade, si man. He asked a question about what year he would start college, weird coming from wee man man. We therefore had movie night and watched Animal House, prepare Mini-B. early and appropriately man. Many (2+1) bowls of Costco popcorn were consumed, ingest Two Guys man. These shall be applied to next week's tally, good head start man. On the return-Mini-B.-to-ex-Mrs.-T-B. trip, our usual egress was blocked, curious man. Many Manyzens of cars were parked along both ways out, unusual man. Many Manyzens of Manyagers, probably hyskoolers, were seen converging on a casa, si man. It was apparently a graduation party, man. When we returned, it was even worse, thread our way through man. From inside the casa, we heard no music but much jovial socializing, still too loud man. We soon heard a cop-siren in that area, someone else must have complained man. There was soon total silence, party probably shut down man. We couldn't imagine all those Manyagers fitting into one casa, occupancy limits man. We have just brushed miu for the Manyth (2x2x2th) -- si man, Manyth (2x2x2th) -- time in 2 days, man. Miu zzz'd through Big Bruddah's visit and was probably regretting having done so, conclude we man. We have itineraried one GS and one ES for Saturday amidst errands, itinerary we man. We have noted that Aldi has opened its first location within range of Ontarklar, man! No party with the rubias tonight, no cavort we man.

Friday GS/ES report, see man: We attended all of the above, si man. Two ESs and a GS yielded the take, see man: -- Many-pack of Many00-watt incandescent bulbs; ~full box Kleenex, partial pack disposable razors = $Many ($2+2), OK man -- hanger = free, heavenly man -- 2 elastic knee-supports = $2, steal man -- half-ream printer paper = $1, OK man Total = $Many ($2+2+2+1)

Gracias, D ma'am. We had a very responsive call with the manufacturer who said that the product was discontinued a year + half a year ago, and that everything in their warehouses was sent out to distributors with no way to know who sold all theirs, si and sigh man. We checked eBay but not FBM, si and no man. Can't one use FBM without being a FB member, huh man?

Sad: Laid-Off Pixar Lamp Gets Job Warming Fries At McDonald's EMERYVILLE, CA — In the wake of Disney Pixar's mass layoffs, sources close to the well-beloved Pixar Lamp Luxo Sr. are claiming that the pop-culture icon has been forced to seek other employment and is now engaged in keeping fries warm at McDonald's. "This is the only place I can find work," lamented Luxo Sr. through a lamp translator. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/sad-laid-off-pixar-lamp-gets-job-warming-fries-at-mcdonalds

What Luck! Biden Finds Prewritten Answer To A Completely Spontaneous Press Question Right On His Note Card WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Biden appeared visibly overwhelmed Thursday during an impromptu on-the-record press gaggle until he noticed the answer to a reporter's completely spontaneous, definitely unplanned-in-advance question was pre-written on his note card. https://babylonbee.com/news/what-luck-biden-finds-pre-written-answer-to-a-completely-spontaneous-press-question-right-on-his-cue-card

Newsom Issues Ban On Legal-Citizen Voting SACRAMENTO, CA - In a recent move to increase voter access, strengthen election integrity, and improve the voting process, California Governor Gavin Newsom has just signed a bill banning legal citizens from voting in local, state, and federal elections. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/newsom-issues-ban-on-legal-citizen-voting

Really valid points are raised here. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ AI and the Replication Crisis in Scientific Research [...] what if some middling academic was applying for a university job and added a few faked publications to their resume. And what if they didn't just make up the paper but backstopped their minor academic fraud by actually getting the paper published in a supposedly reputable journal. What if that is happening all the time? [...] https://hotair.com/john-s-2/2024/05/23/ai-and-the-replication-crisis-in-scientific-research-n3788936

Illegal Alien From Turkey is More Worried About Open Border than Joe Biden [...] The southern border is wide open. There are not enough border security personnel along the border. There is a lack of vetting. No one knows who is coming across the border or why they are doing it. Out of the mouth of an illegal alien: [...] https://hotair.com/karen-townsend/2024/05/23/illegal-alien-from-turkey-is-more-worried-about-open-border-than-joe-biden-n3788937