Alphamalekings

I brought my fiancée to America on a K1, 3 ½ years ago, we married and married life has been wonderful.  Then, out of the blue, my wife left and asked for a divorce.
Why? Because her family in Cebu demanded that she leave and divorce me.  Seriously, my wife left a note: “I love you, but I must leave.”
 
My mistake, six years ago, was that I had told her that my “dream” was to have a mango farm on Bohol.  That dream and FaceBook has ended my marriage.  Of course, there’s more to that.  I’m an RN and ran into a situation at work where a nurse filed a complaint with the Board of Nursing, well, not “a” complaint, rather it was over 40 complaints.
 
The Board of Nursing turned it over to my state’s Attorney General’s Investigative Department (police) and the investigation took over two years.  For those two years, I was unable to work as an RN.  The outcome, not that long ago, all dismissed.  Innocent.  But here I was with no income for two years, and that’s equal to about 10 million pesos that I did not have.
 
Well, it seemed that long ago my soon to be ex-wife told the family about my dream farm.  It is clear that the family, extended family, neighborhood, compadres and all those in the town started waiting for the daughter who married the (rich) American to buy the farm.  But, nobody, and not my wife ever told me that they were waiting for “the farm.”  This expectation was never voiced, I had no clue that one hundred people were waiting for the happy announcement: “daughter has a mango farm for the family.”
 
Year one of our marriage, great, everybody was happy.  Year two, odd family demands, unsettling demands for more and more peso.  Originally, we sent 4k peso, then 6, 8, 10, then Covid hit and I sent 20k @ month, to help the siblings out—but nobody ever seemed happy.
 
One day there was weeping and gnashing of teeth, “papa is to be thrown out of his house.”  (He’s an informal squatter and does not own the land the house is on).
 
Oh, but guess what?  Brother-in-law just happened to have found a good piece of land for only 350k peso.  Great, I said, buy it.  But, *groan*.  No clear title, no proof that taxes were up to date and worse, far worse, the land was land-locked.  This means, no access to a road.  I said the buyer: “Sure, I’ll buy it, let’s work with a lawyer, and pay some peso to a neighbor to get a titled right-of-way.  Her response: “You have no money, you kuripot.” *click* Shortly after that my wife’s sister’s family locked us out on FB.  Huh?
 
Then, every month, on the 15th, when we made remittances, my wife was increasingly traumatized.  I got to dread the 15th, like the plague, just hoping to get through it and no, I was not going to keep increasing remittances forever—so there was argument, our only fights were about family and remittances.
 
Interestingly, papa was never thrown out, so much for the imminent eviction.  One day the family happily announced they had found the perfect small farm, it had mango trees, and was only 3.2 million (US ~$60,000).  It was perfect and I would have loved to buy it but I had gone 2 years with no income and had to say no.
 
Silence, and then volcanic eruptions.  “Papa tried to stab is son, he is in a drunken rage.”  Another week, “Papa has gone on a binge and has broken all the glass in the house.” Translation: “You are a bad daughter, (and by definition, a bad son-in-law), you did not buy the farm, you are forcing papa (an alcoholic) to drink.”
 
Then on October 15th, we were one day late in remittances. Oh, the angst!  The crime of the century.  And the next day, my wife asked for a divorce, packed up and left and has not returned and will not return. 
 
What is fascinating is she was never a gold-digger, she was a great woman, a great wife and I am crushed but there is absolutely nothing that I can do.  It seems to me that this is an odd (maybe, maybe not) case where the cause was the family, not the wife.
 
Her AOS has not been finalized and I wonder what will happen if we are called in for an interview. If asked: “Was this a bona-fide relationship?” I would have to say: “Yes, until the family demanded an end to it and my wife obeyed, even though she had said in our wedding ceremony: “I promise to love, honor, cherish and protect him, forsaking all others, holding only unto him forevermore.”
 
I asked her about her vows (we’re civil, we live in a no-fault state, and are breaking up civilly). Her response: “That wasn’t a real wedding.” (meaning it wasn’t in the Phils)  So, for anyone who might read this, consider marrying your fiancé in the Philippines where the marriage is apt to be considered “real,” by the family.
 
And for the naysayers, no, there is no other guy in the wings.  She’s moved in with a Filipina friend (a married couple) and is doing what her parents demand:  Last week she has worked exactly 88 hours.  I had suspected that but 3 weeks have gone by and there appears to be no hidden lover to be.
 
I wanted a simple Filipina and got one and it was the best, but what I failed to realize was that I did not marry a Filipina, I married about 100 others variously related.  Had I the money to buy that farm, I’d be happily married today.  That’s a hard lesson on Filipina culture.
 
For the Filipinas (ino’s) and spouses here, a question: Is this common?  FaceBook is loaded with good daughters who bought their parents a house/land/farm.  The message to too many is: "If daughter marries a foreign man, the house/farm will come."  Sure, it does for some and sure all daughters and their son-in-laws will and would do that, if they can.  My problem was, I couldn't, at least not in the time-frame that the family wanted.
 
And yes, not understanding I’ve offered to buy the landlocked land or the farm (in a few years since I’ll be back working full-time again in a few weeks) but “no,” I am defined now as kuripot (cheap) and there is no forgiving that.  The family has lost “face.” 
 
And I made it worse since I complained on FaceBook, for when she left I had thought there was another guy, and said so, so now there is no turning back the hands of time.  It is difficult for a Westerner to understand the concept of “face,” but this sums it up.
 
“When you cause a Filipino to lose face in front of his friends or family, you are in for trouble and you need to figure out what to do.  If you don’t, there’s no telling what could happen, including death.  That would be extreme, but it does happen.  Basically, I would suggest that you need to show some humility, and apologize in front of the same people that witnessed the event.  If you don’t do that, the person who lost face will not regain his honor. Basically, if you take no action to correct the problem, revenge might happen, and it might happen even years later.  These things are not easily forgotten.”  https://liveinthephilippines.com/loss-of-face/
 
I shall try to apologize but I’ve been told, it will make no difference and that I must move on, as hard as it is for my Western psyche to grasp.
 
For all Western males here I strongly suggest that you read Culture Shock Guide (Philippines)  Alfredo and Grace Roces.
 
 https://www.amazon.com/Culture-Shock-Philippines-Survival-Etiquette/dp/0761456716/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=culture+shock+philippines&qid=1636306114&sr=8-1

We have been apart since October 2019 and online chatting and messaging is one option, so it really helps. We both work and keep busy. I think it's a good advice to keep yourself busy, time passes quickly when you are busy with something. Don't focuse on how long you have been waiting focus on how little it's left to wait and how happy you will be in the end after reunion!🌺💖
Stay strong, be calm!

Many times couples plan how they will get to the US. One of them will marry a USC under false pretence and then divorce the USC shortly afterwards. Then they will stage a plan to marry their true sweetheart and apply to bring that person to the US.  This is a well known strategy to the immigration officers.
 
Unfortunately, I think your case seems like one of those to them. Things they will probably check is how your husband came about his CR1. Did he have any children with his ex-wife. Why did he divorce his ex-wife?  How soon did he marry you after the divorce? How long did you know each other before you got married? Are you both from the same country, same town? and so on. 

Even if you have a child with him, it may even raise more concerns if he did not have a child with his ex-wife.
 
So you have go be patient for them to check all this.  While your marriage may be genuine and authentic, the question could be - was his past marriage authentic?  That is what I feel the immigrations is investigating and that is why I feel they didn't ask you for anything because they believe your marriage is genuine but are not sure about your husband's past married. I will not be surprised if he is asked to be interviewed.
 
If both his marriages have been genuine and authentic then you probably have nothing to worry about - just wait and all will turn out to be fine.

I had used an attorney in a law firm provided for by my employer for AOS. It was more of a pain than being a help. the paperwork itself is filled by paralegals and not the attorneys themselves. I discovered a number of silly mistakes i probably would not had made myself and had to proof read every form they filled multiple times to make sure there were no issues. from my experience over the period of 10 years with immigration attorneys (for H1B and AOS ), most attorneys add at least a month to the process just for the filling time, as they would not send the paperwork and will sit on it for no reason.

I am originally from Ohio. I'll actually be there this weekend. If you want to do a destination wedding like Las Vegas, NV, I will be happy to help you out. You can fly round trip out of Cleveland really cheap ( See My ticket for this weekend below, 24.20 round trip is a good deal. I'm just flying in for 12 Hours to meet some friends for lunch, my lunch will cost more than the flight...LOL), and we can get you all married with certificate in hand in less than an hour. Message me and I can send you my contact information. And I don't charge anything for members on Visa Journey. We could get you round trip flights, married, and certificates in hand for around 150-160 dollars.... Vegas Baby!!!

There’s a WhatsApp group for you to join. Do not suspend your interview! People are been issued Visa’s despite the ban.

There’s a WhatsApp group for you to join. Do not suspend your interview! People are been issued Visa’s despite the ban.

There’s a WhatsApp group for you to join. Do not suspend your interview! People are been issued Visa’s despite the ban.

Thanks. It was May 1st 2020.
Thank you.

Hallelujah!!!
 
Just got my Visa issued today. God is faithful 
 
You are next!

let her scan it and send to you then you print it and take it along for your interview........ she does not need to send through DHL

https://punchng.com/us-closes-lagos-consulate/

There is a ban on Nigerians doesn't mean that you won't be issue a cr1 visa.. there is a waiver on that process. Do not lose any hope and don't allow anyone to kill your spirit.. good luck and don't give up !
 
 
Read this.. someone that went for his cr1 interview before the convid 19:

On the 5th of March,2020, I got a mail that my passport was at the DHL office in V.I, I panicked because, it was too quick and i started asking my VJ family if all was well..lol. Checked on ceac website and realised it's been issued.

On the 6th of March,2020, I picked up my passport and saw on the passport, that the Presidential proclamation 9983, was waived.

Thank you all, I appreciate. 😘 ( I warned you all, an epistle emerging🤣🤣🤣)

How many people are waiting for CR1 interview

Yes they are. 

Yes they are. 

Yes they are. 

People were still been issued visas despite that. Scroll up this thread.

People were still been issued visas despite that. Scroll up this thread.

People were still been issued visas despite that. Scroll up this thread.

I'll advice you go with the attestation and affidavit that carries the names in your passport 

I dont know why the government tries to make it as dumb and ambiguous as the presidency. Simple language that says "if you already have a visa - you can travel". if you dont have a visa - a new one will not be issued will stop all the nonsense and confusion 
 
 
 
 
 
 

In reading the original post and many of the comments, my heart goes out to these couples expressing frustration.  All of the angst reminds me so much of my own journey with my Brazilian husband, we have many red flags and I had done my research so we knew going in to it that there was no guarantee that he would be approved even after a long process that for some takes many years.  Before we even got married we discussed all of this and made the decision together to try for his spousal visa as one way we could have a life together.  We had a plan B to try and live somewhere else as a couple if the US visa did not work out, like Brazil, or some other country.  We went down into this crazy rabbit hole with eyes wide open, knowing the risks, the expense, the long time of uncertainty and frustration that comes with international romances.  In the end, we got lucky and his spousal visa only took a year, but we were fully prepared for a two or three years or more process if it came to that, and were ready and willing to live somewhere outside the US if necessary, as true love finds a way eventually to overcome the distance.  Tomorrow we celebrate our two year wedding anniversary, he has been in the US for ten months already.  We have been working at home together for three months now because of the virus and life is very very good.  But I empathize with and feel so bad for those of you who are still apart.  Stay strong, explore all options, be grateful for technology that helps so much to keep the flame of love burning brightly, travel as often as you can to be together somewhere, even for a few days, document everything, and understand that government processes are not designed for efficiency or speed.  Good luck to you all!

U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services is preparing some domestic offices to reopen and resume non-emergency public services on or after June 4. On March 18, USCIS temporarily suspended routine in-person services at its field offices, asylum offices and application support centers (ASCs) to help slow the spread of coronavirus (COVID-19). USCIS is following the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s guidelines to protect our workforce and the public. For the latest information on the status of individual offices, check our office closures page.
 
While certain offices are temporarily closed, USCIS continues to provide limited emergency in-person services. Please call the USCIS Contact Center for assistance with emergency services.
As services begin to reopen, offices will reduce the number of appointments and interviews to ensure social distancing, allow time for cleaning and reduce waiting room occupancy. Appointment notices will contain information on safety precautions that visitors to USCIS facilities must follow.
 
If you are feeling sick, please do not go to your appointment. Follow the instructions on your appointment notice to reschedule your appointment for when you are healthy. There is no penalty for rescheduling your appointment if you are sick.
Asylum Offices
USCIS asylum offices will automatically reschedule asylum interviews that were cancelled during the temporary closures. When USCIS reschedules the interview, asylum applicants will receive a new interview notice with the new time, date and location for the interview and information about safety precautions.
 
In accordance with social distancing guidelines, and due to the length of asylum interviews, asylum offices expect to conduct video-facilitated asylum interviews, where the applicants sit in one room and the interviewing officer sits in another room. Asylum offices will use available technology, including mobile devices provided by the agency, to ensure that the officer, applicant, interpreter and representative can fully and safely participate in the interview while maintaining social distancing.
 
For affirmative asylum interviews, applicants must bring all immediate family members listed as dependents on the application and an interpreter, if the applicant does not speak English.  Additionally, a representative, witness, individual providing disability accommodations or “trusted adult” if an applicant is a minor, may attend the interview.
 
For non-detained credible or reasonable fear interviews, individuals must bring any family members listed on the interview notice. Representatives may attend credible and reasonable fear interviews but are encouraged to participate telephonically. USCIS will provide contracted, professional interpreters for credible and reasonable fear interviews.
Naturalization Ceremonies
USCIS will send notices to applicants to reschedule postponed naturalization ceremonies. The ceremonies may be shorter to limit exposure to those in attendance. Instead of playing videos during naturalization ceremonies, attendees will receive a flyer with information and links directing them to the videos on the USCIS website. Under the shortened format, all legally required portions of the ceremony will take place.
 
Attendance is limited to the naturalization candidate and individuals providing assistance to disabled persons.
Interviews and Appointments
USCIS will send notices to applicants and petitioners with previously scheduled appointments and interviews. Those attending appointments should follow the safety guidelines outlined below.
Those who had other appointments must reschedule through the USCIS Contact Center once field offices are open to the public. Please check our office closure page to see if your respective office has been reopened before calling the Contact Center.  
 
Visitors are limited to the applicant, one representative, one family member and one individual providing disability accommodations. The applicant should arrange to have their interpreter available by phone. 
Application Support Centers
USCIS will automatically reschedule any necessary ASC appointments that were cancelled due to the temporary office closure. Individuals will receive a new appointment letter in the mail with specific safety requirements. Individuals who appear at a date or time other than what is listed on the ASC appointment notice may encounter significant processing delays, except for military members. 
Guidelines for Entering USCIS Facilities
Visitors may not enter a USCIS facility if they: Have any symptoms of COVID-19, including cough, fever or difficulty breathing; Have been in close contact with anyone known or suspected to have COVID-19 in the last 14 days; or Have been individually directed to self-quarantine or self-isolate by a health care provider or public health official within the last 14 days. Visitors may not enter the facility more than 15 minutes prior to their appointment (30 minutes for naturalization ceremonies). Hand sanitizer will be provided for visitors at entry points.  Members of the public must wear facial coverings that cover both the mouth and nose when entering facilities. Visitors may be directed to briefly remove their face covering to confirm identity or take their photograph. There will be markings and physical barriers in the facility; visitors should pay close attention to these signs to ensure they follow social distancing guidelines. Individuals are encouraged to bring their own black or blue ink pens.
  More information on visiting USCIS facilities can be found at uscis.gov/visitorpolicy.
Please also visit uscis.gov/coronavirus for updates.

Their stamped passport is their Green Card...until the plastic one arrives...they were legal residents (green card holders) the second they entered the US.