Amanda&Elvio

We did discuss the situation ahead of time. I told him that he couldn't stay here and continue treating me this way. He had a friend in New York and I asked if he would rather go there and he preferred to go home to Paraguay so I did not "send him home". I've read plenty of other posts like that so I understand where that idea comes from but that's not what happened.
I could attribute his behavior to culture shock if it had started here in the US but he had been treating me this way since before we even got married. I told myself he would change once we got married. Then I told myself he would change once we got here. That was probably dumb of me.
I think you are misunderstanding our situation. I didn't hang out with men in Paraguay because I didn't like the way they treated women. It is a very machismo culture, I was catcalled every time I left the house and I didn't appreciate that. After we got married, I stayed home, cleaned the house, took care of everything there while he worked. So basically, what a Paraguayan wife would do. But if I would so much as say hello to a man, he would go into a jealous rage. And then he would dwell on that instance for months afterwards saying that I wanted to be with that man. That, to me, is irrational behavior. I did everything I knew how to do to help him. He admitted that he had a problem with jealousy and that wanted to fix it but that sometimes his thoughts were just out of control. His family is very supportive of both of us and I hope that they will be able to give him some sort of help. I don't see how I'm being selfish at all but I appreciate your opinion.

Givemegoodnews I am going to send you an invitation to attend some "violence domestic convention", and you will be able to educate yourself about abuse. One of the things ALL non profit organizations who helps victims of violence domestic say is that FIRST YOU SEEK SHELTER TO PROTECT YOURSELF FROM THE ABUSER and after that you discuss about your marriage. I am dealing with victims of domestic violence over 22 years, and how about you? . Let's say NO to all forms of violence, let's advise who is living with abuser to seek refugee in a safe place.Speak out and help others in need, but give some advice please based in your experience working with battered people.

We did discuss the situation ahead of time. I told him that he couldn't stay here and continue treating me this way. He had a friend in New York and I asked if he would rather go there and he preferred to go home to Paraguay so I did not "send him home". I've read plenty of other posts like that so I understand where that idea comes from but that's not what happened.
I could attribute his behavior to culture shock if it had started here in the US but he had been treating me this way since before we even got married. I told myself he would change once we got married. Then I told myself he would change once we got here. That was probably dumb of me.
I think you are misunderstanding our situation. I didn't hang out with men in Paraguay because I didn't like the way they treated women. It is a very machismo culture, I was catcalled every time I left the house and I didn't appreciate that. After we got married, I stayed home, cleaned the house, took care of everything there while he worked. So basically, what a Paraguayan wife would do. But if I would so much as say hello to a man, he would go into a jealous rage. And then he would dwell on that instance for months afterwards saying that I wanted to be with that man. That, to me, is irrational behavior. I did everything I knew how to do to help him. He admitted that he had a problem with jealousy and that wanted to fix it but that sometimes his thoughts were just out of control. His family is very supportive of both of us and I hope that they will be able to give him some sort of help. I don't see how I'm being selfish at all but I appreciate your opinion.

We did discuss the situation ahead of time. I told him that he couldn't stay here and continue treating me this way. He had a friend in New York and I asked if he would rather go there and he preferred to go home to Paraguay so I did not "send him home". I've read plenty of other posts like that so I understand where that idea comes from but that's not what happened.
I could attribute his behavior to culture shock if it had started here in the US but he had been treating me this way since before we even got married. I told myself he would change once we got married. Then I told myself he would change once we got here. That was probably dumb of me.
I think you are misunderstanding our situation. I didn't hang out with men in Paraguay because I didn't like the way they treated women. It is a very machismo culture, I was catcalled every time I left the house and I didn't appreciate that. After we got married, I stayed home, cleaned the house, took care of everything there while he worked. So basically, what a Paraguayan wife would do. But if I would so much as say hello to a man, he would go into a jealous rage. And then he would dwell on that instance for months afterwards saying that I wanted to be with that man. That, to me, is irrational behavior. I did everything I knew how to do to help him. He admitted that he had a problem with jealousy and that wanted to fix it but that sometimes his thoughts were just out of control. His family is very supportive of both of us and I hope that they will be able to give him some sort of help. I don't see how I'm being selfish at all but I appreciate your opinion.

We did discuss the situation ahead of time. I told him that he couldn't stay here and continue treating me this way. He had a friend in New York and I asked if he would rather go there and he preferred to go home to Paraguay so I did not "send him home". I've read plenty of other posts like that so I understand where that idea comes from but that's not what happened.
I could attribute his behavior to culture shock if it had started here in the US but he had been treating me this way since before we even got married. I told myself he would change once we got married. Then I told myself he would change once we got here. That was probably dumb of me.
I think you are misunderstanding our situation. I didn't hang out with men in Paraguay because I didn't like the way they treated women. It is a very machismo culture, I was catcalled every time I left the house and I didn't appreciate that. After we got married, I stayed home, cleaned the house, took care of everything there while he worked. So basically, what a Paraguayan wife would do. But if I would so much as say hello to a man, he would go into a jealous rage. And then he would dwell on that instance for months afterwards saying that I wanted to be with that man. That, to me, is irrational behavior. I did everything I knew how to do to help him. He admitted that he had a problem with jealousy and that wanted to fix it but that sometimes his thoughts were just out of control. His family is very supportive of both of us and I hope that they will be able to give him some sort of help. I don't see how I'm being selfish at all but I appreciate your opinion.

We did discuss the situation ahead of time. I told him that he couldn't stay here and continue treating me this way. He had a friend in New York and I asked if he would rather go there and he preferred to go home to Paraguay so I did not "send him home". I've read plenty of other posts like that so I understand where that idea comes from but that's not what happened.
I could attribute his behavior to culture shock if it had started here in the US but he had been treating me this way since before we even got married. I told myself he would change once we got married. Then I told myself he would change once we got here. That was probably dumb of me.
I think you are misunderstanding our situation. I didn't hang out with men in Paraguay because I didn't like the way they treated women. It is a very machismo culture, I was catcalled every time I left the house and I didn't appreciate that. After we got married, I stayed home, cleaned the house, took care of everything there while he worked. So basically, what a Paraguayan wife would do. But if I would so much as say hello to a man, he would go into a jealous rage. And then he would dwell on that instance for months afterwards saying that I wanted to be with that man. That, to me, is irrational behavior. I did everything I knew how to do to help him. He admitted that he had a problem with jealousy and that wanted to fix it but that sometimes his thoughts were just out of control. His family is very supportive of both of us and I hope that they will be able to give him some sort of help. I don't see how I'm being selfish at all but I appreciate your opinion.

I'm so heartbroken, I never thought I would be writing one of these topics. I met my husband in Paraguay almost 2 years ago. I was a Peace Corps Volunteer in his town. We got married 8 months ago and I couldn't have been happier. Our petition was fast-tracked through USCIS since I was living abroad and we arrived in the US together in May.
I always knew that he was a jealous person but I guess that was a bit of an understatement. If I so much as looked at another guy he thought I liked him. I would tell him that's not true and that looking at people, even talking and laughing with people in my culture doesn't mean anything. I am a friendly person. I'm not flirty, just friendly. But in his culture, men and women hardly interact so that concept was very difficult for him to accept. Cheating is also extremely common in his culture so he was naturally insecure. He was constantly accusing me of liking other men for absolutely ridiculous reasons and then wouldn't believe when I told him that he was wrong for thinking that. He was sometimes verbally abusive as well but he would always apologize later and say he was trying to change.
I convinced myself that he would change when we got to the US and saw how our culture was. Nothing changed here. He kept going back to how I acted in Paraguay and all the men I supposedly liked there. We went to see a marriage counselor but that didn't help. Finally I just couldn't take his accusations and his lack of trust anymore. I told him he had to leave. He didn't believe that I would actually send him back to Paraguay so I bought him a ticket for the next day (today). At that point he broke down completely and kept saying "What have I done?!" and "This is all my fault." He accepted responsibility but it was too late. I had given him so many opportunities to change. He said he would go back to Paraguay and pay for his mistakes and maybe take some English classes (he speaks Spanish) and that he wanted to come back and start over but I don't know if that was all a show to get me to take him back or if he was being genuine. I want to believe him so badly and I truly believe that he wanted to change but that his head was not in the right place. I don't want to rush into divorce if there is a possibility of working it out. I also know that he shouldn't stay out of the US for a long time or he risks not being able to re-enter.
I guess I just wanted to get all my thoughts out and see if anyone had any thoughts or advice to offer. I'm just hurting right now, I miss my husband and I don't know what to do. Thanks in advance.

We did POE yesterday and SURPRISE, it was in the Bahamas! Thanks to the ignorance of one CPB officer we missed our flight but the American Airlines staff were awesome and put us on another flight immediately and we were still able to meet our next connection and get to Kansas City on time (but one bag short). 5 flights and 22 hours later we are HOME!!

It's Labor Day here in Paraguay too, that's why my husband's interview, which was originally suppossed to be today was moved to yesterday. He was approved after a short and simple interview (albeit an hour and a half long wait beforehand).
Thanks Saylin for your words of wisdom and for helping us and so many others get through NVC quickly and with a little less stress. We're going home soon!!!

Oi Vey !
The basics. A K1 VISA is used to ENTER the country for the purpose of getting married. It is expired/void/DOA after you pass immigration. It is replaced by an I-194. This gives the person legal status for 90 days to complete the marriage process.
Now to separate "technically" from "reality".
After marriage, you need to adjust status, the AOS procedure. From the time the marriage takes place to the time you have your AOS interview and are approved, you are "out of status". Anyone who is out of status is "deportable". Reality is that immigration understands that it can take some time for this AOS process to begin and end. I have never heard of anyone actually being in trouble of any kind during this process. Some people here took a year or two.Reality is that no one is going to bother you unless you do something stupid like commit a crime. And in an absolute worst case situation, where an ICE agent is having a bad hair day and you find yourself in front of an immigration judge, they will simple tell you to go and start the AOS process asap.
No one is going to get deported because they took a few months or so to file for AOS.
My two rubles.

my wife just text me she was sitting at the doctor's office wiaitng to be called, so i reminded her that we needed a lot of evidence today from the doctor..lol she said :" Ok hun im gonna let him know that Immigration is waiting for these papers as the last latter he submiited has no weight" thenb i said... that is what i am talking about honey ..lol. I am so excited and waiting for her to tell me that she got lot of papers from the doctor today

Speaking from personal experience.....at no point did I ever feel as though I was "saving" my spouse from his 3rd world country but I absolutely felt that he would have many more opportunities to better himself here, than in a country where getting ahead is a rarity.
As far as wanting to send someone back to their country....I can relate to this immensely.
I spent a lot of money and time on my marriage and the visa. I spent many nights crying before and after it was done. I spent even more nights feeling destroyed, jilted and confused as to why this man, who said he loved me just hours before he walked out of my home 6 days after his arrival in the US, would leave me in an instant and throw away the memories and future we could have potentially had together.
Does he deserve to stay here after being a fake or feeling confused about his move to the US or choking me or cheating on me or lyIng to my face day after day?? I would say NO.
Asking how I can send him back is probably the nicest thing I can say because I'd LOVE to do much worse BUT, I think that it's fair enough to ask that question......not wanting to see his face living in the same city I live in, acting as though I didn't exist or this never happened. Yea, I'm all set with all that.
And I'm going to go out on a limb and speak for some others that ask that question. They may have deeper reasons why they ask that, more than what they'd want to share on VJ, because some people can be very judgmental. Not everyone is as vocal as I am....I give details because I know this will help someone else one day. Unless its happening to you, you will never understand.
On that note.....can anyone tell me how I can send my soon to be ex husband/abuser/fake/fraud/liar back to his country?

First, questions should be:
1. Is there a possibility I get the visa in absence of a legitimate relationship? as she can't be predicted.
4. My new girlfriend who is more matured in reasoning really wants to date a married man who she has never met (?) but who loves her very much, even though divorcing his current wife isn't his decision.
I'm sorry, it seems like phone records are the least of your worries at this point. You don't have to be in the US to divorce your wife. Or to date someone else apparently.

And you had to reply.

Darnell, you are not the only one that has been trying... sometimes you just gotta give up trying to help and put the energy on someone who appreciates it!

Well said! No offence to anyone in the April thread... but the NVC content is lost in nonesense, March is much better with minimal OT chit chat :-)
Now back to the thread... the NVC are really going to make me wait till after the 2nd week of april for an interview date, or so it seems :-(

I think this thread is more helpful as you can ask questions and get quick answers and they don't get drowned in a see of off-topic posts which makes finding your answers really hard.

Hello Good folks at VJ! *shshhhh
Let me do My Dance First !




:jest:

:dancing:



:energy:

:dance:



Now time for the Good News:star: Got my CC today!
Yup from Case# 3/8/12 to CC 4/3/12, that's 27 days, and thats 27 days with 2 Checklists. It's just like what Saylin always says, You Gotta Be On Top of it with NVC, like a Fly on a...... ummmm well that part i added but you get my point.
Just want to say Thank you to Saylin and to everybody else for their time spent answering my endless questions.

I had a dream the other night that my husband's interview was May 3rd! Hopefully your wife and I both turn out to be psychic

She doesnt waste her day trying to achieve as many posts as possible to get a higher rating.

Put the horse in front of the cart. Figure out your personal life going forward first. Then make the appropriate immigration decisions.

****UPDATE****
INTERVIEW SCHEDULED: 17APRIL2012 AT 1230
:dance: :dance: :dance: :dance: :dance:
****END UPDATE****

Upon suggestion of a VJ member (thanks foobaz123), I have decided to create a FAQ of the most common questions I see here on VJ concerning the NVC process. If you know of a common question that isn't mentioned here, please inform me through a reply in this thread or PM me. I'd be more than happy to include it here.


FAQ


How long does it take to get a case number assigned after NOA2?
As of recently, it's been taking ~3-4 weeks. Check my spreadsheet (linked in post 1) to see where NVC is currently assigning case numbers.
When (and how often) should I start calling NVC about the case number?
Wait a week from your NOA2 date, then start calling. And call every single day afterwards until you get it.
Will I receive XXXX (initial information package, invoices, instructions, interview letter, etc) by email or snail mail?
As long as you give over the email addresses of both the petitioner and beneficiary (once you have a case number), ALL correspondence from NVC will be sent through email.
What do I do after my case number is assigned?
Get the IIN from an operator (ask for the 'Invoice Identification Number', not IIN). Give over the email addresses of the beneficiary and petitioner. Email the DS-3032 (from the beneficiary's email address) following the template linked above.
When can I email the DS-3032?
Right after you get your case number. There's a chance it could get rejected (because they got to your email before they're ready to take documents), but if that's the case, just re-send it. On the flip side, there's also a chance it could get accepted and you wouldn't have wasted any time.
Note: if you have a lawyer, they're already designated as agent due to the G-28 included in the I-130 package, so no need to send the DS-3032, unless you fire your lawyer.
Note: if doing online forms (check link above for eligibility), then fill out the DS-261 found online at the above link. Do NOT send the DS-3032.
I got an email from NVC that contains a bar-coded DS-3032 (along with other information). Do I re-send the DS-3032?
NO. Do NOT email another DS-3032. NVC automatically generates these emails and do not care if you've already sent in a DS-3032 or not; they include a DS-3032 anyways. Only if NVC responds to your first DS-3032 with a rejection do you send another one.
After the case number is assigned, how long does it take for the AOS bill to be invoiced?
Usually just a few days.
How much are the two bills? And how do I pay them?
The AOS costs $88 (per case) and the IV is $404 (per person). They have to be paid with a US banking account on the payment portal (site linked in first post). See information here: http://travel.state..../info_3906.html If you can't or don't want to pay online, here's a link to how to pay through the mail: http://travel.state..../info_3905.html .
Help! I can't sign into the payment portal. Why?
If you're getting an error message ("Please be advised that the case that you have attempted to access is not eligible for further processing by the National Visa Center at this time…" or "This case is in the process of termination. Fee payments and online forms can no longer be accepted…" or "You cannot make online payments for your case at this time. Please contact the NVC if you have questions or need further information."), do NOT panic. This is actually good news! If you just got your case number, then this message means NVC is inputting your case in their system. If you get this message a few days after case number generation, then it's a good possibility that NVC is invoicing your AOS bill. And if this message appears a few days after DS-3032 acceptance, then there's a good chance the IV bill is being invoiced. And finally, if this message is appearing a few days or more after NVC received your packages, this is a good indication of case complete at NVC!
What is needed in the AOS package?
Generally, the following is needed:
With no joint sponsors:
- Bar-coded cover sheet from payment portal
- Cover letter (optional)
- Completed, signed, and dated I-864 form by petitioner
- Tax information* of petitioner (either just the last year OR the last 3 years)
- Employment letter of petitioner (optional, but good proof of CURRENT income)
- Pay stub(s) of petitioner (optional, but good proof of CURRENT income)
With joint sponsors:
- All of the above of the petitioner
- Completed, signed, and dated I-864 of joint sponsor
- Tax information* of joint sponsor (either just the last year OR the last 3 years)
- Proof of US citizenship/residency of joint sponsor (ex: copy of US passport, US birth certificate, US naturalization certificate, or front & back of green card)
- Employment letter of joint sponsor (optional, but good proof of CURRENT income)
- Pay stub(s) of joint sponsor (optional, but good proof of CURRENT income)
If the joint sponsor is a household/family member, also include proof of that relationship (example: if a parent is a joint sponsor, include the petitioner's birth certificate with parents' name on it to show link).
*You have two choices here of what to send in:
- Tax return transcripts ordered from IRS (preferred by NVC and of most consulates/embassies) RECOMMENDED
OR
- Tax returns (1040) and W2s and any other schedules (if applicable)
What if I (the petitioner) live with my spouse in their foreign country? Do I need to include anything in either package?
You'll need to provide proof of US domicile with the AOS package, as well as bring it with you to the interview. Please read the I-864 instructions (pages 5 and 6) for information about it. This is NOT needed if the petitioner is living in the US. Here is a sample cover letter to include in the package (it lists MANY possible documents, some may not be applicable of course, to prove that you have, or will re-establish, domicile in the US):
NAME
SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER
FORM I-1864
No. 15 Country of Domicile
I, XXXX, am currently residing in FOREIGN COUNTRY with my spouse, SPOUSE'S NAME. Below you will find a list of attached documents to show that my principle residence is in the US and the steps that I have taken to return to the US with my family.
Steps I have taken to maintain US Domicile:
• Maintained my XXXX voter registration
• Maintained my XXXX credit card registered in the US with a US PO box
• Maintained my bank account at the XXXX Credit Union
• Maintained my bank account at XXXX Bank
• Maintained my XXXX drivers license
• Maintained my US retirement fund through XXXX
• Maintained my US investment account with XXXX
• Maintained my US PO box
• Maintained licensure by the XXXX
• Maintained membership in the XXXX
• Maintained my automobile in care of my parents
Supporting Documents for the above steps I have taken:
• Voter registration card showing permanent US address
• XXXX credit card statement showing US billing address
• XXXX Credit Union statement showing permanent US address
• XXXX Bank statement showing permanent US address
• XXXX drivers license showing permanent US address
• Retirement fund statement showing permanent US address
• Mutual fund statement showing permanent US address
• XXXX license currently up to date
• Renewal of XXXX membership
• County tax bill showing I still own a vehicle
Steps I have taken to return to the US to take up residence:
• Made arrangements for us to have a house to live in
• Contacted schools for requirements of things to bring to register my children in school
• Contacted my auto insurance company to find out about re-instating my insurance on my car
• Contacted shipping company for estimate of costs to ship belongings
Supporting documents for the above steps I have taken:
• Lease agreement for our house
• Email from schools regarding registration requirements
• Email from my former auto insurance company regarding my inquiry
• Email from XXXX with estimate and correspondence regarding shipping our belongings
I declare that I intend in good faith to re-establish my domicile in the United States no later than the date of spouse's admission into the US.
I certify under penalty of perjury under the laws of the United States that the statements in this letter and all accompanying evidence are true and correct.
Signature: ____________________________________________________ Date: ______________________
NAME
Thanks to VJ member lemayz for this suggestion!
When does the IV bill get invoiced?
After you send the DS-3032, NVC will most likely respond in a few days with an acceptance email (or rejection). A few days after acceptance, the IV bill will be invoiced.
What is needed in the IV package?
Generally, the following is needed:
- Bar-coded cover sheet from payment portal
- Completed, signed, and dated DS-230 form by beneficiary (do NOT sign or date part 2; this is done at the interview) [note: if doing online forms (DS-260), the DS-230 is obviously not needed]
- Two passport-style photographs (2" x 2") of beneficiary (on the back, write: beneficiary's full name, date of birth, and case number)
- Copy of bio-data page of beneficiary's unexpired passport
- Original or Certified Copy of beneficiary's birth certificate, PLUS A PHOTOCOPY
- Original or Certified Copy of marriage certificate, PLUS A PHOTOCOPY
- Original police certificate(s)
Please read: http://travel.state..../info_3195.html for additional documents if applicable.
Also read the country-specific documents linked in the first post. There may be additional documents needed not listed above.
If my documents are not in English, do they need to be translated?
NVC's website states:
"All documents not written in English, or in the official language of the country in which application for a visa is being made, must be accompanied by certified translations and submitted to the NVC. The translation must include a statement signed by the translator stating that the:
-Translation is accurate, and
-Translator is competent to translate."
Despite this, I have seen cases of people getting checklists for not having translations of non-English documents. I'd suggest you get everything translated anyways to be on the safe side. It's not needed, but highly recommended.
How long does it take for a bill to appear as PAID in the payment portal after paying it?
Usually just a day or two.
Do I have to wait for NVC to email me instructions before mailing packages?
NO. If you wait on NVC for this, it can take WEEKS to get anything from them. As long as the respective bill appears as PAID in the payment portal, you can send in your package.
What address do I send the AOS and IV packages?
You will find their addresses on their respective bar-coded cover sheets, which are printed off the payment portal.
Can the packages be sent from abroad or does it have to be from within the US?
Doesn't matter where the package is sent from; NVC just needs to receive it.
Do the packages have to be sent separately or can they be sent together?
Either one or the other works. Again, as long as NVC receives both needed packages, they don't really care. Each way has their pros and cons.
After sending in the packages, how long does it take to get a case complete?
Lately, it's been taking just a few days to a week after the last package is received.
Do I get an email if my packages have been accepted?
No, not that I have seen. You have to call NVC every day and ask for updates on your case to find out if a package has been reviewed and accepted.
Do I get an email when my case is completed?
Generally, no. Only those doing EP (electronic processing) get the case complete emails. There are some non-EP folk that get case complete emails, but it's rare. Again, to find out if your case is complete, call an operator at NVC and ask.
After the case is completed, what happens?
In most cases: the case is put in a queue to get an interview date scheduled. Once an interview date is scheduled, the case is shipped out to the consulate/embassy.
Who should I be calling to find out my interview date?
You should be calling both NVC and DOS. Both have access to your case information. Their numbers are linked above.
How long does it take to get an interview date after a case complete?
This varies by country and consulate/embassy. Some people find out within a day or two, others a few weeks, then the few unfortunate that wait a few months (ex: Ghana). To get the best estimate for YOUR country is to search, using the timeline feature, when others got case completes and when they got their interview dates scheduled.
When do interview dates get scheduled?
If you talk to operators at NVC, they'll always tell you they ONLY schedule during the second week of each month. This is a LIE. They schedule interviews ALL month long. Many people (like myself) have gotten scheduled during the last week of the month. I repeat, they schedule ALL month long.
How long does it take for NVC to mail my case out after getting an interview date scheduled?
Usually it's the next day, but it can take up to a week or more in rare cases.
-------------------------------------------------------
Please note: the above time frames are just estimates. Do NOT freak out if your case takes a little bit longer. The time frames are constantly changing. They also depend on NVC's work load for that day/week.
-------------------------------------------------------
Summary of NVC process:
- get case number and IIN, give email addresses over
- email the DS-3032
- pay the AOS bill, once it's invoiced
- once the bill appears as PAID, mail the AOS package
- pay the IV bill, once it's invoiced
- once the bill appears as PAID, mail the IV package
- respond to any checklists, if applicable
- get case complete
- get interview date scheduled

anyone else ever notice how the main automated voice guy at NVC sounds like piglet from winnie the pooh??

My wife came here from a VERY different culture. One run by a dictator. Brought up under a soviet era mindset. She hardly spoke English. Everything here was different, and I mean everything. It took her almost two months to just unpack her suitcase. She never had a car. Still cannot master driving. She had a decent job as an accountant. Now she cannot even find a job as a clerk in a grocery store. It has not been easy. The best thing for her was we live within walking distance from the beach, which she loves. A town with an actual main street where you can find most anything, and of course, a big city, New York, about an hour away by train/car. She has been here almost 2 years and has adjusted fairly well, all things considered. The main thing is that we love each other.
My job is closing down and now we NEED to re-locate because this area is just too expensive, So we are looking at Florida. A huge move for both of us. We spoke about this and her reply was 1. as long as I am with you and 2. can we please be near an ocean. My whole point here, finally, is that sometimes life takes you into strange directions. And the journey can be as exciting and interesting as you want to make it. Moving a few hours away from his family is nothing. And you husband needs to overcome his fear of a transition, just as you did. But for him it should be cake. You traveled half way around the world.
I have one brother in Seattle and another in Denver, but mom is in New York. That is what phones are for. And the occasional trip. Maybe the two of you can take a week and visit the Seattle area. Ask a real estate agent to show you some places to live, as if you were actually moving. Drive around a bit. It may just turn out to be the best thing for both of you.