Can't find co-sponsor, Need your help

[meandmybeloved 15]

Ok, so here is the problem. I I can't find a co-sponsor. My family isn't real close. I asked them but they said no. My sisters husband asked his boss about sponsoring because he works at a nuclear plant, and has high

security clearance and didn't know if sponsoring some one from out of the country would effect his job, and his boss advised him not to.

I haven't been able to count on my family much for anything.

I have 3 kids. ages 14,7 and 6. I need daycare assistance to be able to work and pay for daycare. I just don't make enough to cover daycare by myself. I use to get the assistance from the government, but they now tell me a week after I found a job that they will no longer cover my daycare and help me pay for it. So I lost my job cause I had no one to take care of my kids after they got out of school.

As I said, my family has never been close.

I also have fibromyalgia, which is a muscle disease that affects all the muscles in the body and can be very painful. This disease causes my muscles to stiffen and cease up and it can make it hard for me to walk or move at times. It has been compared to being similiar to MS. I say this, cause this too limits me on the type of job I can find, cause even though I look healthy, I'm not. My muscles are weakened and I have little strength in them.

My wonderful fiance Rick comes down from Canada at least once a month to help me take care of things around the house that I just can't do. I am not sure at this point what choices we have left in order

to get him here. We didn't know if we could qualify to have this expedited or not. But that still doesn't solve our sponsor problem. I still have a couple people out there who are thinking about it, but have yet to commit.

We are looking into the CR-1, but we aren't sure if there is anything else out there for us that might work better.

Right now, I get plenty of child support for my kids that it alone covers all my expenses, so this is a plus. I plan on working when Rick does get down here while he is applying for his AOS. He will be able to look after the kids then while I work. This freeing me up to work more of a flexible shift.

Any help or advice will be appreciated and I will look into whatever advice we are given. Thanks ahead of time.

[thelastpetitioner 218]

im sorry but filing for cr-1 doesnt change anything.maybe you should start looking into moving to canada?

even if you do work the expidit out,you STILL need help with the finances

[aleful 1,905]

Ok, so here is the problem. I I can't find a co-sponsor. My family isn't real close. I asked them but they said no. My sisters husband asked his boss about sponsoring because he works at a nuclear plant, and has high

security clearance and didn't know if sponsoring some one from out of the country would effect his job, and his boss advised him not to.

I haven't been able to count on my family much for anything.

I have 3 kids. ages 14,7 and 6. I need daycare assistance to be able to work and pay for daycare. I just don't make enough to cover daycare by myself. I use to get the assistance from the government, but they now tell me a week after I found a job that they will no longer cover my daycare and help me pay for it. So I lost my job cause I had no one to take care of my kids after they got out of school.

As I said, my family has never been close.

I also have fibromyalgia, which is a muscle disease that affects all the muscles in the body and can be very painful. This disease causes my muscles to stiffen and cease up and it can make it hard for me to walk or move at times. It has been compared to being similiar to MS. I say this, cause this too limits me on the type of job I can find, cause even though I look healthy, I'm not. My muscles are weakened and I have little strength in them.

My wonderful fiance Rick comes down from Canada at least once a month to help me take care of things around the house that I just can't do. I am not sure at this point what choices we have left in order

to get him here. We didn't know if we could qualify to have this expedited or not. But that still doesn't solve our sponsor problem. I still have a couple people out there who are thinking about it, but have yet to commit.

We are looking into the CR-1, but we aren't sure if there is anything else out there for us that might work better.

Right now, I get plenty of child support for my kids that it alone covers all my expenses, so this is a plus. I plan on working when Rick does get down here while he is applying for his AOS. He will be able to look after the kids then while I work. This freeing me up to work more of a flexible shift.

Any help or advice will be appreciated and I will look into whatever advice we are given. Thanks ahead of time.

any friends? it doesn't have to be a family member, and even your friend can live in another city or state.

[Brother Hesekiel 2,235]

I understand your situation and your predicament. For you being married and having a man in the house could really change your life around for the better. Unfortunately an Affidavit of Support is a serious commitment, and if you cannot get any of your family members to help you out here, you will have to find a friend willing to jump in. If you have no friend willing to do that, perhaps your fiance has assets that could be transferred to the U.S. and then used to satisfy the requirements of the Affidavit of Support?

Edited September 25, 2011 by Just Bob

[Inky 1,110]

My husband has a high level of security clearance and is in the military. It has definitely affected him and his job.

He has to have a special form from the FBI stating he is allowed to marry me and has to have a waiver from them. He also has to do several forms and tests from the military and his security clearance etc. I also have to have an FBI interview every time he needs to renew his security clearance. I may also have to have one for my ROC and citizenship testing.

[meandmybeloved 15]

thank You everyone. Yes, I have asked one of my best friends, but he is just being weird about it. Thing is, everyone that knows me knows I have excellent credit,

pay my bills on time every once in a while they might be a few days late but other than that, I'm good with my finances,

so those that are close to me should know that I would not steer them wrong.

[BlueBonnet 84]

I think any couple that are in different countries and wanting to take their relationship to the next step and marry, have to have the conversation of whom moves where. I think that if you arnt willing to move to the other persons country to be with them, how could you ask them to give up everything for you ?

Based on everything that you have said, he shouldnt be coming here, and honestly, with the support requirments, its sounds like you wouldnt be approved anyways.

Why not go to Canada ... you have to at least look at it.

The thing is, that your post sounds really desperate. Like there is no other answer/option for you. This isnt true. But you are only looking at 1, you really do need to consider all the other options.

[meandmybeloved 15]

I think any couple that are in different countries and wanting to take their relationship to the next step and marry, have to have the conversation of whom moves where. I think that if you arnt willing to move to the other persons country to be with them, how could you ask them to give up everything for you ?

Based on everything that you have said, he shouldnt be coming here, and honestly, with the support requirments, its sounds like you wouldnt be approved anyways.

Why not go to Canada ... you have to at least look at it.

The thing is, that your post sounds really desperate. Like there is no other answer/option for you. This isnt true. But you are only looking at 1, you really do need to consider all the other options.

Wow, your jumping to conclusions here. First I never said I asked him to come here, it has been his choice to move here to be with me. Secondly, I never mentioned that I wasn't willing to move to Canada, but since you are mentioning it, I think that you should know that I have 3 children whom their father would never in a million years sign for my kids to move out of the country. First that is not the kind of person I am, to up and move my kids away from their father. My kids would suffer because of that. And secondly, my fiance has 2 children that are adults now, so it is much easier to have him move here.

Why do you think that we did not have a conversation about who would be moving where?

You've made a lot of assumptions that are not accurate.

You have said nothing in this post that has been uplifting at all, but quite the opposite, and that is not what this forum is for, but instead it is for us to be able to come here for support. I have looked at my other options and right now, I don't see any. Desperate? Yes, maybe I might sound a little desperate to find a solution to this problem, cause this is my soulmate and my best friend we are talking about. Living life without him is not a option. My fiance has a good career in canada, but the field which he has expertise in is slim in canada but not here in the states, so he is excited about moving down here and getting back to doing what he loves.

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

The best course of action is to educate yourself about the sponsorship requirements and explain them to a trusted friend. Namely, the requirement is NOT that the sponsor has to give the immigrant money, just that IF the immigrant uses welfare or the like, the government can ask the sponsor to pay that back. You, as the spouse will be the primary sponsor, so the gov will go after you first.

Your future husband can become a USC in 3 years if you remain married and the sponsorship your friends signed will no longer be in effect. Most chances are that nothing will change for them.

Edited September 27, 2011 by Harpa Timsah

[skiptex 225]

what is the minimum requirement you must make to show support?

[I+H 11]

The best course of action is to educate yourself about the sponsorship requirements and explain them to a trusted friend. Namely, the requirement is NOT that the sponsor has to give the immigrant money, just that IF the immigrant uses welfare or the like, the government can ask the sponsor to pay that back. You, as the spouse will be the primary sponsor, so the gov will go after you first.

Your future husband can become a USC in 3 years if you remain married and the sponsorship your friends signed will no longer be in effect. Most chances are that nothing will change for them.

Great idea Harpa!

Many times if you can explain in detail what this person is signing up for they may feel more comfortable agreeing to do so. You could print up form I-864 and it clearly states above the signature what the signee is agreeing to. Print one out and show it to your friend.

And it is ok to be "desperate", though I don't view you as being desperate. This is the man you love and you should be trying to exhaust all avenues to get him here. If no one wants to sponsor for you, the only suggestion I have, is contact a church, tell them you need help and maybe someone will want to help. It may not work but its an idea and it also to gives someone the opportunity to feel like they made a difference in an otherwise struggling single mother's life. I'v been there and it sucks, but there are more people that want to help then we think. Keep up hope and keep fighting for your man and don't let anyone tell you different or call you "desperate".

I wish you the best of luck and just for the record, if I didn't have to have a co-sponsor myself, I would be interested in getting to know your character to see if I could help you out myself, so I am going to go so far to say that there may be others out there like me.

what is the minimum requirement you must make to show support?

You have to make 125% above poverty level for the size of your household including your beneficiary.

[Ready to do it 101]

Wow!!! 3 kids and you don't make the minimum. I'm sorry, I would not co-sponsor for you if you were my own child.

I too recommend you move to Canada. I just don't see any other way. It's not that your friend is being "wierd" about it. Your friend has probably educated himself with what it entails. CO-sponsoring for someone is about the most foolish thing I think any USC can do. It's a complete travesty that the US government hooks an innocent USC into this contract which could completely destroy someone financially for the rest of their life.

I wish you luck, but I think Canada is your best bet.

[meandmybeloved 15]

Great idea Harpa!

Many times if you can explain in detail what this person is signing up for they may feel more comfortable agreeing to do so. You could print up form I-864 and it clearly states above the signature what the signee is agreeing to. Print one out and show it to your friend.

And it is ok to be "desperate", though I don't view you as being desperate. This is the man you love and you should be trying to exhaust all avenues to get him here. If no one wants to sponsor for you, the only suggestion I have, is contact a church, tell them you need help and maybe someone will want to help. It may not work but its an idea and it also to gives someone the opportunity to feel like they made a difference in an otherwise struggling single mother's life. I'v been there and it sucks, but there are more people that want to help then we think. Keep up hope and keep fighting for your man and don't let anyone tell you different or call you "desperate".

I wish you the best of luck and just for the record, if I didn't have to have a co-sponsor myself, I would be interested in getting to know your character to see if I could help you out myself, so I am going to go so far to say that there may be others out there like me.

You have to make 125% above poverty level for the size of your household including your beneficiary.

Thank you so much for understanding. That means so much. And your right, I will not stop till he is here for good. And I have already printed out the I-134 form and the I-864 form with instructions so that I can show it to those that I have asked, but they haven't let me get that far. As the previous posted stated, I have very clearly stated several times to my family and friends, not to compare co-sponsor with " co-signer". These are two very different things. I have gone as far as to tell them that not only are they not responsible for taking care of rick , nor will they have to pay his bills or anything, but I have told them that if they would feel more comfortable I would go to a local atty and ask him to draw up a document reassuring the co-sponsor that rick will not ever hold them responsible for paying his way.

Thank you again, and just pray that God opens a door to someones heart to step up and be willing to help us out here.

[I+H 11]

Thank you so much for understanding. That means so much. And your right, I will not stop till he is here for good. And I have already printed out the I-134 form and the I-864 form with instructions so that I can show it to those that I have asked, but they haven't let me get that far. As the previous posted stated, I have very clearly stated several times to my family and friends, not to compare co-sponsor with " co-signer". These are two very different things. I have gone as far as to tell them that not only are they not responsible for taking care of rick , nor will they have to pay his bills or anything, but I have told them that if they would feel more comfortable I would go to a local atty and ask him to draw up a document reassuring the co-sponsor that rick will not ever hold them responsible for paying his way.

Thank you again, and just pray that God opens a door to someones heart to step up and be willing to help us out here.

Good for you girl! Just keep it up and God willing someone will step up and help you both out. I will keep you in my prayers.

And please don't let some of these people get to you, if they have any heart they would be doing the same thing you are for their loved one if they had to.

Edited September 27, 2011 by I+H

[meandmybeloved 15]

Wow!!! 3 kids and you don't make the minimum. I'm sorry, I would not co-sponsor for you if you were my own child.

I too recommend you move to Canada. I just don't see any other way. It's not that your friend is being "wierd" about it. Your friend has probably educated himself with what it entails. CO-sponsoring for someone is about the most foolish thing I think any USC can do. It's a complete travesty that the US government hooks an innocent USC into this contract which could completely destroy someone financially for the rest of their life.

I wish you luck, but I think Canada is your best bet.

Is no one reading and understanding that I have 3 kids. I may have a ex-husband, but I would never ever do something like up and move to canada and take my kids from their father, so I don't understand why I keep getting comments to move to canada. Are you saying that I should tear my kids away from their father, or suggesting I leave them behind?

Neither are an option. I believe in my God above and believe that he has put Rick and I together for a reason, and he will make a way.