Moving to make your SO more comfortable

[PurpleSky 19]

After reading one of the threads here, I got to thinking about something...

Has anyone moved (or thought about moving) to another state/different area once their SO arrives in order to better help them adjust to life here?

Believe it or not CT is pretty diverse and we have a decent sized Nigerian community (so I've heard ) so I think FH will be ok from a cultural standpoint. Besides, since we're so close to NYC, we can make due with visits there when he's really homesick until we move down to ATL in a few years which has a very large Nigerian community. Another area we thought about was Houston but I'm not sure about that.

[max+patricia 24]

I have lived back and forth between Utah and Hawaii since 2007 and I always thought that my home in Hawaii would work nicely for my fiancee and I since she's from a tropical climate and isn't partial to cold weather. Over the past few years though, as she's visited me in both places, she's determined that even though she'd feel more comfortable in Hawaii, she loves Utah. We have no idea where we'll settle down the road.

There's no Venezuelan community in Hawaii - and probably a pretty small one in Utah, if any at all - so I can't speak of that being a factor for us. It's pretty cool that you're considering such a change for your fiance, but I'm sure wherever you both end up, you'll be happy as long as you're together

[patient2010 93]

Never thought about moving but either one of those places would be great.......

[trillium13 84]

I wouldn't personally recommend Texas for people who aren't from Texas. There's a lot of the "you ain't from around here" BS going on. I would imagine it's not as bad in the large cities, but it exists.

We're moving out ASAP.

[TBoneTX 45,536]

We're moving out ASAP.

To Canandaigua? I'm jealous, si man, unless there's snow on the ground, brr man.

[trillium13 84]

To Canandaigua? I'm jealous, si man, unless there's snow on the ground, brr man.

Lol, not back to Canandaigua, no man.

[Zee Bee 61]

How does your fiance feel about being around a huge Nigerian community?

I am the USC but originally Ghanaian and I can't handle being around too many Ghanaians. When my husband (then fiance) came over I made it a point to get him acquainted with the Ghanaian community, grocery stores etc (we were living in Philly then). My BIL lives in VA in a community that is literally 90% Ghanaian and we have some friends in NJ that live in a similar community. When I asked by husband if he was interested in living closer to a bigger Ghanaian community he said no. Not that we are against it or anything, but its a matter of personal preference. We have our African store where we can get stuff from and when we go to VA we have a great time, but we don't want to be around it all the time.

Just something to think about

[MensahLuv 4]

How does your fiance feel about being around a huge Nigerian community?

I am the USC but originally Ghanaian and I can't handle being around too many Ghanaians. When my husband (then fiance) came over I made it a point to get him acquainted with the Ghanaian community, grocery stores etc (we were living in Philly then). My BIL lives in VA in a community that is literally 90% Ghanaian and we have some friends in NJ that live in a similar community. When I asked by husband if he was interested in living closer to a bigger Ghanaian community he said no. Not that we are against it or anything, but its a matter of personal preference. We have our African store where we can get stuff from and when we go to VA we have a great time, but we don't want to be around it all the time.

Just something to think about

Funny that you say this. I never ask my fiance his preference but he told me during conversation that he did not want to be strictly in a Ghanaian community. I'm glad he brought that up early of him being here. ( Almost 2 weeks) So that I would not go out of my way of searching for a specific community.

[PurpleSky 19]

He is good with it. He doesn't want to live in the community itself but he does want the option of having the ability to celebrate holidays and events with them. Also when we raise our children having the community within reach is important. Plus I think because he's been away from home for the last four years, he misses them.

I know what y'all are saying though because his brother (the one married to my cousin) refuses to live around other Africans period. He has one friend here in the states and that friend lives in NYC.

[the governor 0]

Yes to the original question--moved several times, but never found a place that was particularly better in one way or another as far as homesickness, so we go back and forth between countries.

[Darnell 8,478]

For me - she wanted to live somewhere within driving distance of any PRC community - not necessarily IN said PRC community, but within driving distance. Cooking and language are really important within her culture, I pay attention to this stuff or she'd be really homesick ..

Edited March 31, 2011 by Darnell

[Kang Lang 7]

if it was a way to make my now husband more comfortable then absolutely. he already moved across the world for a life with me so the least i could do is try to make him as comfortable as possible here. we are fortunate in the my husband lived here while we were dating and he has 2 of his very best friends from home locally. and in the bay area there is a sizable thai community so speaking thai and socialising in restaurants and temples made the transition very easy.

jmho as the usc's who have foreign national spouses we should very seriously consider making that move since they have given up a life to be here whether or not they come from first, second or third world countries, wealthy or poor they still had some life before us.

good luck to everyone!

[Tyeger87 10]

i was actually considering moving for employment reasons, my line of work is best done in DC or New York BUT i realized that being at home in Atlanta, around family would be better for him for 2 reasons 1) he know my family and some of my friends 2) it would be so stressful for me to adjust to a new city while having him adjust to a new country. Plus, Comorians dont immigrate to America so there is no sizeable community anywhere, i think the largest would be in New York where the people who work for the Comoros Mission to the UN work and live with their families.

[A and J 4]

My husband is doing this for me, I have been working on and off in OK since 2006 so have a good solid base there and he is ready for a change. I don't much care for Florida either (great holiday spot but living here is another matter). We are moving this summer and both looking forward to it. He has also stated that if I am willing to countries for him then he will move states for me.