Intimate photos/ having sex while Fiance

[TBoneTX 43,482]

First, a K1 will not have a stokes interview

Educate yourself so that you don't make sweeping and false statements that can mislead others, please. This has happened and does happen. Furthermore, the COs have asked about sex.

[Richie Rich 70]

I presume they will ask for photos together whether in mall , park or tourist resort . Acceptable photos are pics with both of u close and together . The private questions will come later after you have yr AOS interview .

[LIFE'SJOURNEY 970]

Educate yourself so that you don't make sweeping and false statements that can mislead others, please. This has happened and does happen. Furthermore, the COs have asked about sex.

You need to educate yourself, if a K1 never had sex, then the answer would have been no sex, and the consular would have stop the questioning. Nothing says b/c you are engaged that you should have had sex. So educate yourself, if there was no sex, than how can the conversation continue. how can a consular prove that you have had sex, if you are engaged. if you are stupid enough to answer the question if it goes beyond proper questioning than that is your fault. The consular can only assume that a CR1 has consummated their marriage.

They can ask about any damn thing, but only you can give them answers to continue the questioning. If no sex, what can they say?

Edited March 14, 2011 by LIFE'SJOURNEY

[LIFE'SJOURNEY 970]

Educate yourself so that you don't make sweeping and false statements that can mislead others, please. This has happened and does happen. Furthermore, the COs have asked about sex.

You need to educate yourself, if a K1 never had sex, then the answer would have been no sex, and the consular would have stop the questioning. Nothing says b/c you are engaged that you should have had sex. So educate yourself, if there was no sex, than how can the conversation continue. how can a consular prove that you have had sex, if you are engaged. if you are stupid enough to answer the question if it goes beyond proper questioning than that is your fault. The consular can only assume that a CR1 has consummated their marriage.

They can ask about any damn thing, but only you can give them answers to continue the questioning. If no sex, what can they say?

You'll are scaring people when there is nothing to scare petitioners about, the consulars are not asking about their sex lives in detail. Show me where a Consular has gone into detail questioning of a petitioner about their sex activities.

[wesly 3]

This is a grown up conversation!

So I have noticed that some fiance' visa applicants are asked about having sex with their partners and are asked to produce intimate photos. While some folks do have sex, others think its bad form to have sex before marriage. This doesn't seem to vary by nation but more perhaps by religious proclivity.

How can consular officers ask about or expect that those of us in Fiance' relationships will have had sex???

And honestly my sex life is none of their business, but I'll answer the questions if it gets my fiance here. I think it borders on cruel and unusual punishment.

I agree with you. i'm from Haiti too. They wanted me to be there for a dual interview and they ask me all those kind of question. All you need to do is be honest with them.

[TBoneTX 43,482]

You need to educate yourself, if a K1 never had sex, then the answer would have been no sex, and the consular would have stop the questioning. Nothing says b/c you are engaged that you should have had sex. So educate yourself, if there was no sex, than how can the conversation continue. how can a consular prove that you have had sex, if you are engaged. if you are stupid enough to answer the question if it goes beyond proper questioning than that is your fault. The consular can only assume that a CR1 has consummated their marriage.

They can ask about any damn thing, but only you can give them answers to continue the questioning. If no sex, what can they say?

You'll are scaring people when there is nothing to scare petitioners about, the consulars are not asking about their sex lives in detail. Show me where a Consular has gone into detail questioning of a petitioner about their sex activities.

You've misread my answer. In post #9, you wrote "The sex question is only asked of maerried [sic] couples." No, it is not. Later, in the post that I quoted, you wrote "a K1 will not have a Stokes interview." Both of these statements are patently incorrect. Several VJ couples (K-1 and CR-1) were given Stokes interviews and questioned at length about their sex lives in Ecuador in 2008 and 2009. They most likely represent only a fraction of the total number who were asked. One's bottom dollar can be staked that the sex questions were asked at other consulates worldwide, and that K-1 couples worldwide have been given Stokes interviews. Read the various embassy/consulate reviews and the regional subfora, and if you come back with data to prove me wrong, I'll apologize. Meanwhile, stop making sweeping assertions that fly in the face of what real VJ members have actually experienced. Edited March 14, 2011 by TBoneTX

[LIFE'SJOURNEY 970]

I agree with you. i'm from Haiti too. They wanted me to be there for a dual interview and they ask me all those kind of question. All you need to do is be honest with them.

Please explain, what question did they ask regarding your sex activities? After they asked if you'll were sexually activity, where did it lead to? HAITAI has a Hugh Catholic population, so if you had stated that you had abstained until marriage . Do you think they would not have believed you?

[sachinky 464]

You're overthinking this stuff, tbh.

[LIFE'SJOURNEY 970]

You've misread my answer. In post #9, you wrote "The sex question is only asked of maerried [sic] couples." No, it is not. Later, in the post that I quoted, you wrote "a K1 will not have a Stokes interview." Both of these statements are patently incorrect. Several VJ couples (K-1 and CR-1) were given Stokes interviews and questioned at length about their sex lives in Ecuador in 2008 and 2009. They most likely represent only a fraction of the total number who were asked. One's bottom dollar can be staked that the sex questions were asked at other consulates worldwide, and that K-1 couples worldwide have been given Stokes interviews. Read the various embassy/consulate reviews and the regional subfora, and if you come back with data to prove me wrong, I'll apologize. Meanwhile, stop making sweeping assertions that fly in the face of what real VJ members have actually experienced.

To define it as a Stokes interview, just because a couple is questioned at the Consular level with certain questions, do not constitute it as a Stokes interview. That has been my statement, again a consular cannot make the assumption that because you are engaged that you have participated in sexual activities. So, I still stand by my answer.

[GeoffandAnna 19]

better safe than sorry....now where is my Polaroid?

[Mr. K 8]

I have not heard of them asking for intimate photos, but I was informed once that a couple was asked for an intimate VIDEO. That's right.

Edited March 14, 2011 by Mr. K

[TBoneTX 43,482]

a consular cannot make the assumption that because you are engaged that you have participated in sexual activities.

This statement is defensible and has some merit. However, I'm not talking about this statement.

You wrote (in black & white above) that "a K-1 (couple) will not have a Stokes interview." If you mean this (words mean things, and these words of yours are very clear), please provide the data behind this statement and the source for it.

You also wrote (in black & white above) that "the sex question is only asked of married couples." If you mean this, please provide the data behind this statement and the source for it.

To define it as a Stokes interview, just because a couple is questioned at the Consular level with certain questions, do not constitute it as a Stokes interview.

Look up the formal definition of a Stokes interview and paste it into your next reply. The couple is grilled separately (sometimes for hours) and is asked any infernal thing that the consul insists upon knowing. Answers that fail to match, or questions that either member of the couple refuses to answer, are black marks. This is beside the two points of yours that I've quoted (for a second time), because K-1 couples have been asked the sex questions in Stokes interviews. Is this clear yet?

[Danni and Hamza 36]

Algeria IS a high fraud consulate. My guess is that they have no interest whatever in your personal life but it is the type of question that could have conflicting answers. Conflicting answers is a waving red flag of fraud. I have heard of interviews where they ask the applicants to draw a picture of their bedroom or their apartment or ask what side of the bed they sleep on. They don't care and it is not relevent to issuing a visa, the are checking for fraud.

The important thing is for both people to be honest. IF they ask about sex and you are not having sex, then say "No". There is no requirement to have sex before a visa is issued.

Hello, I totally agree. Honesty is the Answer. They dont care what the answer is, just as long as its honest, and not conflicting with your answer...if they happened to ask you. They are just looking for fraud.I agree that they have no interest in anyones personal life, they are just trying to connect all the dots, to make a decision.

Thanks! I've never heard of a follow up phone interview. I am drafting my second letter of intent to marry for my fiance to bring to the interview and I'm going to put in explicit details of our first meeting (no dirty stuff!) and continued meetings, our continued intent to marry, and a request for them to call me with further questions because of the DOS travel warning in Haiti. How long of a letter do you think they will reasonably read at the interview?

The issue was not explicit photos of us doing the deed, rather even kissing photos seems like asking a bit much. I do have photos of us kissing, of us swimming together, etc. Phone records, stamped passport, you name it! I just want the interview to go well for my fiance. He's terrified as it is.

I appreciate the humor with which many of you approach this topic, however these issue do come up and have come up. As to them not asking sex questions of K1 visa applications, the link that I provided was one such interview. i didn't think they did "stokes" interviews except for CR1 and married folks who have more to prove when it comes to a marital relationship. We don't live together yet so I have no idea what side of the bed he sleeps on, nor the color of his toothbrush, etc.

They can't interrogate one man by himself so perhaps its better if I *don't* show up for the interview? Its hard to figure out how to play this game. I can't likely be there for the current interview date because I have very strong obligations with my work until mid-May and I naturally need to keep my job!

In the end if they delay the visa and make me travel there for a second interview I'll be mad! But of course i'll do it.. just another frustrating delay.

Thanks for all the input!

Hi again. For the letter of intent. I would keep it very short and simple. They have a sample of this under example forms I belive. For the timeline of your relationship. I would keep to the basics with that too. You dont want to give them something more to question you about. The more information you give them, will just give them more ammo for questioning. In my opinion anway. Just Short, sweet, and to the point. Make sure your Fiance has reviewed your timeline as well, so that you are not giving confilicting answers. We did a timeline with dates, and then gave a brief history about how we met, and how the relationship evolved. We did not go into much detail.

Hope this helps!

[DasBoot 7]

Please explain, what question did they ask regarding your sex activities? After they asked if you'll were sexually activity, where did it lead to? HAITAI has a Hugh Catholic population, so if you had stated that you had abstained until marriage . Do you think they would not have believed you?

Please stop misleading people!

You are suggesting that the "correct" answer to any sex question is to say you have not had any and hope hey believe you.

This is very dangerous reasoning, and is exactly how people wind up in trouble, because as soon as you start making stuff up then you will eventually get your stories mixed up and get denied for no reason.

There is no right or wrong answer: if they ask you about sex (which according to many people on this site with personal experience they might), then just answer truthfully and move on.

[TBoneTX 43,482]

For the letter of intent. I would keep it very short and simple. They have a sample of this under example forms I belive. For the timeline of your relationship. I would keep to the basics with that too. You dont want to give them something more to question you about. The more information you give them, will just give them more ammo for questioning. In my opinion anway. Just Short, sweet, and to the point. Make sure your Fiance has reviewed your timeline as well, so that you are not giving confilicting answers. We did a timeline with dates, and then gave a brief history about how we met, and how the relationship evolved. We did not go into much detail.

This is good general advice. If the consulate has asked for specific information, be sure to provide that.

I ended up providing three "letters of intent to marry" to the ####### Guayaquil consulate. I've always wondered whether this is a record.