Worried ... 18 and married.

[Tom&Steffi 0]

Hey everyone!

I am a little bit worried about our upcoming Interview ...

and i would be very glad if you could give me some advice!

So, I entered the US on a Tourist Visa (i had no intention to get married)

I have proof of that (Flight ticket back to Germany, had a job & apartment,...)

anyways ... I visited my BF here and after two weeks here, we were laying in bed and talking about our

future together ... flying back and forth is so expensive and we just wanted to be together.

so he asked me to marry him and stay with him in the US. I said yes

(it's always been very hard not seeing him - i think you all have been thru the same thing ...)

2 months later we got married (my parents, both grandparents, brother, cousin and friends flew over here on a very short notice, his family came to our wedding - everybody was happy that we got married )

and we filed for AOS in December.

Now my concern is that there's gonna be a problem about my age/age difference.

well, I am 18 years old right now and my hubby is 26.

We were introduced via myspace by a mutual friend - his brother about 3 years ago.

and maybe you see were the problem could be.

At this time I was 15. When we started dating I was 16 and he was 23.

That is perfectly legal in Germany ...

but what about california??

I visited him about 6 times in the last 3 years and he visited me about 35-40 times (he works as a freelance video editor and had some freelance work in Germany - we sent his lufthansa flight-record-thing as evidence too)

He grew up in Germany - lived there for almost 20 years (His parents were stationed over there)

He speaks fluently german and knows everything about the german culture (or however you'll call it)

So I am really worried that there's gonna be a problem about that ...

Or do you think the officer won't even care about it, because we are married now ...

Thank you so much for your help and input

xx

[msd 3]

I think, if you have enough proof, it shouldn't be a problem.

8 years is not that much of a difference imo. Althought I admit I don't know how Immigration thinks about that.

Do you have alot of pictures from the wedding? Greeting cards? I don't see a big problem here, but can't answer your question about legality of a relationship between a 16 and 24 year old.

Good luck!

[payxibka 10,044]

much ado about nothing

[krautlaus 7]

I don't think they'll ask about your sexual activities and if so... the age of consent in California is 18 - so no legal issue - I mean you don't have to tell them if you did have intercourse before getting married (thus, under 18)

good luck!

[Brother Hesekiel 2,235]

You are talking about two different things.

1) At age 18 you are way too young to get married. Seriously. Go and experience sex with lots of other guys and then, when you are at least 25, figure out whom you want to get married to. Since you are not going to do this anyway, it's comforting to know that you are old enough to get married even in California. Early age has the advantage that you can get a divorce early as well and then you got your experience that way. (I hope you realize that I'm being sarcastic here.)

So, no, there's no problem to marry your BF and successfully adjust status afterward.

2) Sex. Oh, yes, sex. An adult having sex with a minor, as in a person under the age of 18 is guilty of statutory rape. That's a felony which caries a long prison sentence. But, to translate a Germany saying (Sprichwort): Where there's no prosecutor, there's no judge. What that means is that if you don't admit that you had sexual relations (Clinton) with your BF before the age of 18, there is not going to be anybody able to twist your BF's arm because of it. I wouldn't assume that any I.O. will make it an issue at the AOS interview, but if he or she does and you state you did what you shouldn't have done, sh*t might hit the fan with a vengence.

Therefore, do what you need to do, but don't do what you shouldn't do.

[Laura & Kyle 16]

The OP is already married. You seem to be most concerned about the issue of your age (as a minor) before you two got married. I would suggest being honest, but don't overdo it. The IOs can tell when a person is overcompensating or trying to hide something, so just be truthful. I'd go by the rule of "not asked, don't tell" in this situation. Unless they have been previously tipped off, I doubt they would try to find something out like this.

Good luck and try to breathe. If you are really freaking about this, have a consultation with a lawyer. If you are just looking for casual reassurance, you're in the right place.

[krautlaus 7]

Bob, I think you're being a little harsh with the girl. Deciding to get married and most of all, going through the long and weary process of obtaining a visa for the US is not something to easily say yes to. I'd say, although she is indeed very young, she's hopefully put some serious thought into this. Heck people keep asking me (a few years older than the OP) if I'm sure I want to do this and I am so sicking of all the questions and prejudice.

I fricking knew I wanted to marry my man shortly after we met.

I do agree on your second answer though... be careful what you say to Immigrations - they have a wicked sixth sense for lies.

[john_and_marlene 162]

Bob, I think you're being a little harsh with the girl.

I've noticed that sometimes bob is just wrong and other times just bob is wrong.

[Brother Hesekiel 2,235]

Krautlaus,

1) Is it possible that you overlooked the part where I stated that I used sarcasm?

2) Statutory rape is still a serious crime even if the alleged rapist marries his victim years later.

I sure as hell would mention this to a Federal Agent, as surely as I would tell 'em about all the illegal drugs I might have used years ago, assuming I had used any, as 99% of the population did, US Presidents included. After all, one should never lie to USCIS, even if that would mean that one's petition is denied or that the spouse goes to jail for many years. (Okay, that's sarcasm, again.)

[krautlaus 7]

1) Nah actually I didn't. Correct me if I'm wrong but doesn't sarcasm in fact mean that you intend to look down on someone for their opinion/way of life/statement? - Still harsh IMHO (people get offended so easily. I wasn't offending you. I was defending the OP)

2) Seriously? There's a huge difference between a girl thinking she is ready to have sex with someone she loves and a girl being raped. You do not get to compare these two. Awful!

[M.O 6]

I dont think its going to be a problem...as long as you are telling the truth and your relationship is real,you will be fine...

Dont listen to all of these people in here...Some of them are 50 or 60 years old and marry someone who is 20,..hows that any better?

[Tom&Steffi 0]

I think, if you have enough proof, it shouldn't be a problem.

Do you have alot of pictures from the wedding? Greeting cards?

Good luck!

Yes, we have A LOT of pictures. Like I said my whole family flew in from Germany and I think even that is enough proof that our marriage is real ...

I've heard so many times now, that I was too young to get married, but I can only say, that we are truly in love.

Of course we could get a divorce in 5 years, but a couple in their late 20's or 30's too - i think.

and I am married now for 6 months already and it's not easy being in the US, doing all the paper #######. I haven't seen my family since our wedding.

okay, his family lives 5 min from our apartment away and they help us a lot ...

I still think that I did the right thing and I was just a little worried about that under 18 thing ...

But I will be truthful at our interview and we'll see ...

thanks for your advice!!

[Laura & Kyle 16]

sounds like ya have a good head on your shoulders now. the paperwork isn't so much fun but the results are worth it.

[Tom&Steffi 0]

sounds like ya have a good head on your shoulders now. the paperwork isn't so much fun but the results are worth it.

Thank you so much! I'll be so glad when it's finally done ...

The USCIS Officer can question us all day long ... Our Marriage is real & we love each other ...

So I am not that worried anymore!

[VanessaTony 3,567]

2) Statutory rape is still a serious crime even if the alleged rapist marries his victim years later.

2) Seriously? There's a huge difference between a girl thinking she is ready to have sex with someone she loves and a girl being raped. You do not get to compare these two. Awful!

Okay. I hope I don't offend you too much krautlaus but I think you REALLY should have looked up the term "statutory rape" before you insinuated Bob was being heartless...

"Statutory rape" is the term used to explain sex with a minor. Whether the minor consented is irrelevant, the issue being the child is "unable" to make the decision themselves where an adult should have known better. Bob is in NO WAY comparing sex with someone she loves with rape. Whether she loves him or not, sex with a minor is statutory rape.

Here's a wiki article for you: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Statutory_rape

---

To the OP. Meeting someone and "falling in love" when you're "underage" is pretty much irrelevant. You could be 26 yourself and him 32 and been together for 9 years and it still wouldn't matter. They MIGHT think that it's a bit of "puppy love" but honestly, what right do they have to deny you happiness simply on their own negative view of love.

Meeting through a family member is good. Being together for so long is good BUT you need to know that sometimes they ask some VERY personal questions. Family approval is a great thing too.

They MIGHT question you a bit more than someone else if you get an interview and they equally might not... your paperwork isn't any more difficult that anyone else doing it your way. BUT you should know that if you ARE denied then you will be given 30 days to leave and then apply for a CR-1 visa from your home. As you're adjusting from a visitors visa you have no means by which to appeal the decision.

Best of luck.