hes gones hes actually gone

[What Happened? 4]

did he just say she hit him?

The person doesn't have to actually be hit or harmed in any way to get a restraining order. All they have to do is go down to the court and lie on the forms. It is when they go to court that the judge will see he is a liar and drop the restraining order. She can just as easily file one against him and it is more likely his will be dropped and hers will stand.

Please be careful with this man and take this seriously, you can always get more stuff. Just make sure you are always in a safe place and being alert and protecting yourself.

Been through this already....it can turn scary real fast....keep family and friends around you.

Sorry for your pain.

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

Sorry to hear things didn't work out.

Your only recourse for the personal items is probably to take him to civil court.

[Y's_habibitk 2]

Im sorry to hear about all of this.

like some others suggested:

First, file a police report..let them call it what they want, just make an attempt to get it on record that he took all of your possesions.

and get a lawyer

[Madame-Butterfly 0]

thank you for you words i dont know what to do i know its gonna sound dumb but i do have feelings for him and i dont wanna be right down there at his level, does one ever get over this , hurt, embarasment, heartbreaking , THING

[rebeccajo 14]

omG I'm so sorry this is happening to you.

I was also involved in a bad breakup with my foreign SO. Take a deep breath, and this too shall pass....you can't see it now, but it will. Just focus on contacting the lawyer so that you can make steps to get your stuff back. The rest will work itself out the way it's meant to, and you will get through this. It's prolly not the time to tell you this, cos you are still in shock, but it's true....just focus on one step at a time.

In my prayers!

Your support of the OP is nice, but your situation wasn't the same. They are here together; they have scuffled and involved the law; and he has run off with her possessions.

Yeah, I get that, but still giving the OP some kind words to help her through this. The initial shock that things are over is one of the most heartbreaking things to go through...I'm sure a lot of us here know that...so I was just offering a few kind words.

Secondly, clearly you can see her explanation of what happened came AFTER my post, so obviously I didn't know the details. Then again, I wasn't about to ask, because she will only explain what she wants to, and I didn't feel an explanation was needed to offer my support.

Is there a bigger point that I am missing or is this just you being pedantic?

I thought she posted what happened in her original post.

Oh well, my bad.

[Ban Hammer 12,837]

for the op

moved from Off Topic to Effects of Major Family Changes on Immigration Benefits

this is a better forum for this topic

[rebeccajo 14]

thank you for you words i dont know what to do i know its gonna sound dumb but i do have feelings for him and i dont wanna be right down there at his level, does one ever get over this , hurt, embarasment, heartbreaking , THING

Yes, you will.

I do think that if you two were hitting on each other, that you BOTH need to get your anger under control.

Given just the overview of what has happened, I kind of disagree that your SO was just in it for the visa. It sounds like you two weren't suited at all.

[Fandango 1,439]

thank you for you words i dont know what to do i know its gonna sound dumb but i do have feelings for him and i dont wanna be right down there at his level, does one ever get over this , hurt, embarasment, heartbreaking , THING

Yes, you will. Just take things one step at a time.

[Madame-Butterfly 0]

thank you for you words i dont know what to do i know its gonna sound dumb but i do have feelings for him and i dont wanna be right down there at his level, does one ever get over this , hurt, embarasment, heartbreaking , THING

Yes, you will.

I do think that if you two were hitting on each other, that you BOTH need to get your anger under control.

Given just the overview of what has happened, I kind of disagree that your SO was just in it for the visa. It sounds like you two weren't suited at all.

i told him from the begining he he wanted to leave he could and he wouold constantly be making remakrs that as soon as it was over he would leave , the reason whey we bpoth hit each other is if he hits me i am gonna defend myself, but nothing more than that and if it were the other ways around it be the same i would guess

[BunzTheMagicSnail 2]

MButterfly I can't help you with the legal aspects of your situation

but i offer you my best wishes

i hope you can retrieve your items and move on with your life as quickly as possible

[Madame-Butterfly 0]

thank you very much

my sister this morning when to drop him offa letter and this guy wich was his boss came out and told her she couldnt see him couldnt take the letter and he returned my cell phone cause he said the reason why he keep it was to get me to leave him a message that would make me look even worse but since it didnt work i get to keep it he said...... 5 minuts ago i got a call from the dean asking why i was at the university this guy told them my sister was me and i immidietly got a call from the cops that one more thing and i get arrested can you beleive the nerve os this guy ????

i really am speachless dont know what to do or how should i act, the worse part is that brett still does nothing !!!!

[DanielParul 50]

You don't need to stoop down to his level but do protect yourself and remember if he has done this already he might have more things up his sleeve and you need to be ready.I hope this mess gets sorted for you before more harm is done.

[Madame-Butterfly 0]

well i have been cheeking up the cell phone numer , bills and found out he has been keeping money and has a new cell phone thats why he didnt answer mine

[Created 6]

Very Sad............but you will get over it, and you will grow from this experience. Have you contacted a lawyer yet? Don't let the day pass before doing so, even if it's just initial advice.

Praying for you.

RMH

[MIDUVIL 34]

well i have been cheeking up the cell phone numer , bills and found out he has been keeping money and has a new cell phone thats why he didnt answer mine

Hello,

Sorry for what happened to you. And I'm really sad what I read some posts here.

Love is something wonderful, and it would be more wonderful if behind there aren't those dark things of visa.

When I read stories like yours, I can't understand how it's possible to hurt people that loved-love you and that you loved-love so much.

I wish you good luck, and think about protecting yourself.

Brett is doing things (you said that he still does nothing) he put a protecting order against you, maybe some people at the university know about his things' version (his side of the story) and more you insist to talk to him, more he can do things against you. He has witness (this one who saw your sister), you tried to call him (maybe he can tell that it's agression or abuse or ...)....

It's easy for me to tell you that because your heart is linked to him.

Go and see police-put a protecting order against him also

Go and see a lawyer and ask advices.

I give you those advices because sometimes I watch judge Judy at TV, and often one of her reply is ''I don't believe you, WHY didn't you go and do something, that doesn't seems logical (logic) for me... your case is dismiss''. And she loves to read police documents.

In the case he would like to go further, you will have some police documents with you. Just in case. Just to protect you. Just in case he forgets that you are his wife that he promised to love-to cherish and to protect.

Just...

You can still loves him, but in the case he loves you less. Protect yourself.

With all my heart-good luck for the future

Edited July 10, 2009 by MIDUVIL