how many people cancel their petition...more info inside...

[Mike and Thanh 0]

I did searched and read some stories about petition cancelation. I wonder how many are result of maybe that person might not be the one after all. I'm not saying that's the case for me, not saying we don't have issues, but hopefully those can be resolved. Which one of you have this experience of canceling the petition because of this reason. Regardless of who is at fault, did you regret about canceling or regret you chose perhaps the wrong person? And will you do it all over again if you can find the one. I'm just curious because I know a friend that did exactly that. He brought a girl over to the U.S. from Vietnam. It was great at first, but after filing the petition, things went downhill. I didn't get the whole detail from him, but he said it was a big mistake. He regret ever having to do all of this. The waste of time, great deal of money, and the emotional pain he gone through. He said he will never go back to find a spouse. He's going to find one in the states. He knew about the fiancee will soon go to an interview. He just told me to be sure and careful. What he said got me curious. So which is why I am asking this here. I would like to hear your stories.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

I did searched and read some stories about petition cancelation. I wonder how many are result of maybe that person might not be the one after all. I'm not saying that's the case for me, not saying we don't have issues, but hopefully those can be resolved. Which one of you have this experience of canceling the petition because of this reason. Regardless of who is at fault, did you regret about canceling or regret you chose perhaps the wrong person? And will you do it all over again if you can find the one. I'm just curious because I know a friend that did exactly that. He brought a girl over to the U.S. from Vietnam. It was great at first, but after filing the petition, things went downhill. I didn't get the whole detail from him, but he said it was a big mistake. He regret ever having to do all of this. The waste of time, great deal of money, and the emotional pain he gone through. He said he will never go back to find a spouse. He's going to find one in the states. He knew about the fiancee will soon go to an interview. He just told me to be sure and careful. What he said got me curious. So which is why I am asking this here. I would like to hear your stories.

For 2008, the most recent figures available 2,457 K-1 petitions were "withdrawn" 386 of whom later regretted the decision in a poll with a 78% response rate. ALL of them had subsequently married American women and were miserable...but no distinct correlation in the misery index was related to marrying American women in this survey.

bsaboutk1visasandothermeaninglesssurveys@comcast.com

Yours friends advice to "be careful" is good. His advice to find an American woman...not so good according to this survey. Myself, I would be more likely to try being GAY.

Edited June 13, 2009 by Gary and Alla

[iLoveAPolishGirl 0]

Myself, I would be more likely to try being GAY.

Rather down about american women, huh?

Since there is no hyperlink, can't look at the survey, but I'd doubt there is much diff between long-term marriage survival whether one spouse is an immigrant or not.

dvc

[Ovi 0]

Myself, I would be more likely to try being GAY.

Rather down about american women, huh?

Since there is no hyperlink, can't look at the survey, but I'd doubt there is much diff between long-term marriage survival whether one spouse is an immigrant or not.

dvc

I think it is more of a cultural issue though. There are many wonderful women here in the US as well, but for some, meeting someone from their own culture makes a big difference. Just my 2c.

[Marina-Del 10]

I canceled a previous petition. Or actually, we didn't cancel it, we just never used his visa.

In 2005/2006, while living in London, my Australia fiance (who also lived in London) and I filed for his K-1 visa. We went through the whole process, he had his interview, got the visa. The day AFTER his visa interview, I broke it off. I contacted the embassy and they said that as long as he never entered the US using the visa (which was valid for 6 months) that we didn't need to write any type of formal cancellation letter. That was almost 3 years ago and he never entered the US using it, so it was all canceled out. I broke it off because he wasn't the guy for me...and shame on me for not realizing that sooner. We lived together in London for a year and had dated for a year before that (I visited him in Aus for 3 months and he visited me in the US for 3 months). So I can't say it was because we didn't know each other enough, or blame it on the internet, exactly. Basically our relationship online was perfect, but it was the relationship in person that just didn't work. I knew that it didn't work for a lot of the time we lived together in London, but I kept telling myself that I could live with those things. He and I were really good friends, and we're still friends, that was why it was so hard for me to break it off. Once he had the visa though and we were scheduled to walk down the aisle 30 days later, it really hit me that I was about to get married to someone that I hated every night before bed. Like I said, we were good friends, but a relationship just didn't work. I broke it off and he was really upset (not so much about us breaking up really, but more about the cancellation of everything....his family had already bought tickets to the US for the wedding, he had already told his job we were moving, ect). We lost a lot of money not only from the K-1 visa, but from the wedding we canceled less than 30 days before it was supposed to happen. Like I said, he was pretty pissed at first, but now he realizes how silly we would have been to get married. About 2 weeks later he started dating another girl and they are still together and seem happy.

I didn't plan on filing for anyone again. I was just living my life. But I lived abroad so naturally it was more likely for me to meet a non-American than an American. I started dating Del, a Brazilian that was living in London and we've been together since. We lived in London for 1 year together, then Italy, and now we live in São Paulo, Brazil. I feel totally comfortable with him and am confident that he's the one I want to spend my life with. I *never* felt confident that the Aussie was the one I wanted to spend my life with. I was kinda sure, but never confident. With Del I am sure.

Basically, deep down I always knew that the Aussie and me weren't for each other...and deep down I've always known that Del and I were. Trust yourself.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Myself, I would be more likely to try being GAY.

Rather down about american women, huh?

Since there is no hyperlink, can't look at the survey, but I'd doubt there is much diff between long-term marriage survival whether one spouse is an immigrant or not.

dvc

It was a joke (sort of, I simply am not interested in being Gay) I did see a survey where American man/Ukrainian woman marriages had an 81% 10 year "success rate" and American/American marriages were about 50%. Not sure how scientifically accurate it was. Interesting anyway.

[lost in Egypt 4 u 0]

I did searched and read some stories about petition cancelation. I wonder how many are result of maybe that person might not be the one after all. I'm not saying that's the case for me, not saying we don't have issues, but hopefully those can be resolved. Which one of you have this experience of canceling the petition because of this reason. Regardless of who is at fault, did you regret about canceling or regret you chose perhaps the wrong person? And will you do it all over again if you can find the one. I'm just curious because I know a friend that did exactly that. He brought a girl over to the U.S. from Vietnam. It was great at first, but after filing the petition, things went downhill. I didn't get the whole detail from him, but he said it was a big mistake. He regret ever having to do all of this. The waste of time, great deal of money, and the emotional pain he gone through. He said he will never go back to find a spouse. He's going to find one in the states. He knew about the fiancee will soon go to an interview. He just told me to be sure and careful. What he said got me curious. So which is why I am asking this here. I would like to hear your stories.

You got to remember....when you meet on line there is no way u can be close to somebody as if u meet in person and live together for a while.

Everything sounds good for people on line because u can say what u want and i m sure u feel different then when u r together in person.

Life is not easy ,no matter how u turn it to begin with and to get used to each other and work out problems it takes a special partner to do so.

I believe couples run into a relationship to fast and then they realize that the other one was not the one they love anyhow.

It all sounds so good before u meet and those 2-3 times u meet in their country only shows the good side.

I cancled my petiton though i knew him in person and met him here in the US .We talked for almost 2 years after that on line while we were waiting for the K1 visa but when he stopped talking to me for weeks i realized he did not love me and just wanted the green card perhaps.

I just thank god that i felt that coming on or i would have been one unhappy women.

This was not the first time this happend to me .Both were from arab countries and both just wanted the green card.I was looking for love and fell for the smooth talk just as i wanted .

I m not from US either and married a American in my first marriage .I married him because i loved him .

It was no problems getting my green card because i think the embassy knows who is honest and who is not .

Thanks for the smart people at the embassy who make u wait for a long time so u can see the truth about being used or not !!

We all want to be loved but best is always to stay with your own people in your own country because they think and act like you.

The gras is not greener on the other side,some times is worse.

God bless all of the women and men that r going trough visa journey and hope they have a happy life with those they love !

[lost in Egypt 4 u 0]

Myself, I would be more likely to try being GAY.

Rather down about american women, huh?

Since there is no hyperlink, can't look at the survey, but I'd doubt there is much diff between long-term marriage survival whether one spouse is an immigrant or not.

dvc

It was a joke (sort of, I simply am not interested in being Gay) I did see a survey where American man/Ukrainian woman marriages had an 81% 10 year "success rate" and American/American marriages were about 50%. Not sure how scientifically accurate it was. Interesting anyway.

As soon as those women from the Ukrain get americanized they r no better.

I am not American either and i know !!!!

American men want it all ......they want a women that cookes ,cleans and is a good ####### .

Well he will get that in a ukrainien women until she has her green card then she will be by by !!!

U can;t have it all american men!!!!!!!!!!!! It just does not work!!!!! LOL LOL LOL

If you were nicer to the american ones u could be happy as well !

[rooster 1]

Myself, I would be more likely to try being GAY.

Rather down about american women, huh?

Since there is no hyperlink, can't look at the survey, but I'd doubt there is much diff between long-term marriage survival whether one spouse is an immigrant or not.

dvc

It was a joke (sort of, I simply am not interested in being Gay) I did see a survey where American man/Ukrainian woman marriages had an 81% 10 year "success rate" and American/American marriages were about 50%. Not sure how scientifically accurate it was. Interesting anyway.

As soon as those women from the Ukrain get americanized they r no better.

I am not American either and i know !!!!

American men want it all ......they want a women that cookes ,cleans and is a good ####### .

Well he will get that in a ukrainien women until she has her green card then she will be by by !!!

U can;t have it all american men!!!!!!!!!!!! It just does not work!!!!! LOL LOL LOL

If you were nicer to the american ones u could be happy as well !

Your comments on this are inappropriate and out of line. To generalize ANY culture or sex is WRONG. So, why don't you just STFU!!!!!

[Mike and Thanh 0]

Thanks to those that have commented. Like I said, I was just curious. My fiancee and I are definitely in love. The only reason why she want to come over to the U.S. is because of me. She has a pretty good life in Vietnam. Her family and friends are there, has a good job with very good pay(as far as Vietnam is concern), and used to the lifestyle there. When she comes here, she will be like a fish out of water. I think most if not all of us go through all of this for one simple reason: LOVE. Right? I guess my friend is just upset about his situation. I did talked to him for a bit more and what I learned was the girl just wanted the green card, didn't really love him at all. So he felt used. In my original post, I said he brought her over to the U.S., but actually he found out the real reason when they were still in Vietnam. He didn't say more about why, but he was definitely very upset. I do appreciated what he say to me though. He considered me a good friend, so he want me to know the reality. He said that while there is such a thing as true love, just be careful of being used. If he didn't think me as a friend, he probably just said who cares, that is your problem, right?

I think once you find that person you know is the right person, you will do whatever to be with that person. That is why we all go through this process. Sure it has it's downs, as far as all the paperwork and wait time, but the ups far outweigh the downs. I'm 34 years old and it took me until now to find the one. This will be my first time marriage. I often asked myself why it took this long, but I'm glad I went through what I went through in the past. I really believed now the saying of, everything happen for a reason. Sorry for my ramblings, but I think only VJers know what I'm talking about or how I feel. Nobody else will understand what we have to go through and why we go through all this for.

[clueless_in_usa 8]

As soon as those women from the Ukrain get americanized they r no better.

I am not American either and i know !!!!

American men want it all ......they want a women that cookes ,cleans and is a good ####### .

Well he will get that in a ukrainien women until she has her green card then she will be by by !!!

U can;t have it all american men!!!!!!!!!!!! It just does not work!!!!! LOL LOL LOL

If you were nicer to the american ones u could be happy as well !

Wow!!!

You certainly speak with authority! How many times have you been burnt already to think that way? If you are so sure about Ukrainian women, it means that you have had experience with dozens of them. Am I right? Or are you just an envious loser?

I do know Ukrainian women, and Russian women, and Belarusian women. I do not like them because they cook or clean or are whores. In fact, very few of them have cooked or cleaned for me, and they are very respectable ladies, in addition to highly educated (certainly more educated than you). I do not mind cooking. I indeed love cooking, and I will probably do it more than any woman who decides to be with me. And I do not mind sharing the cleaning either.

However, the highly educated feature and the fact that all the ones I knew made me a priority over their careers was and will always be very attractive to me. If I marry one Ukrainian, Russian, or Belarusiian woman I will be sure that our family will be our priority (not only hers). Somebody like that will never come to USA only to get a Green Card.

Of course, there are bad men and women everywhere, I am not naive, but my experience tells me that your disgruntled attitude is pure B.S., with capital letters. If really knew Ukrainian women you would know that most of them do not want to leave their country and instead would like the man to move to Ukraine. However, they are aware of the financial reality, reason why they reluctantly accept to move to the man's country.

Next time get an education before you decide to share your biased opinion in a public forum.

[MouadsWife 161]

If your going to tag urself as the comment police, let me enlighten you that your comment was completely inappropriate and out of line when you say STFU. We are all here for support, and your not exactly falling in that category. No one wants to listen to comments like this. Something I learned in kindergarden btw... if you dont have anything nice to say, dont say anything at all.

Your comments on this are inappropriate and out of line. To generalize ANY culture or sex is WRONG. So, why don't you just STFU!!!!!

[Ban Hammer 12,857]

For 2008, the most recent figures available 2,457 K-1 petitions were "withdrawn" 386 of whom later regretted the decision in a poll with a 78% response rate. ALL of them had subsequently married American women and were miserable...but no distinct correlation in the misery index was related to marrying American women in this survey.

American men want it all ......they want a women that cookes ,cleans and is a good ####### .

i don't know of too much of a demand anywhere for a woman that won't cook, won't clean, and is a bad #######.......

[Danu 19]

I will cook you dirty socks and then ___________ with my toe.

yup yup.

[Marina-Del 10]

If your going to tag urself as the comment police, let me enlighten you that your comment was completely inappropriate and out of line when you say STFU. We are all here for support, and your not exactly falling in that category. No one wants to listen to comments like this. Something I learned in kindergarden btw... if you dont have anything nice to say, dont say anything at all.

I disagree...I think he was completely in line in saying STFU.....but that's just my opinion. He wasn't attacking anyone with his remark...whereas the poster that was making horrible remarks about all Ukrainians was being highly inappropriate and violating TOS if I'm not mistaken...