Pregnant at 11

[Jaylen Brit 0]

Proud of her for smoking drinking and having sex at age 11? What kind of attitude is that?

It's called 'positive attitude'.

Not sure if you're joking here or not - or do you honestly think its good an 11 year old does these things?

Maybe its the use - or misapplication IMO - of the word 'pride' here.

What's wrong with her saying 'This is upsetting and not what I would have wished for her, but its happened and we'll deal with it by helping her as much as we can' That to me would be supportive without condoning the behaviour.

To me, and I suspect many others reading the article, it comes across as 'yes she's done well to get herself knocked up at age 11'

Should she be SUPPORTIVE? Yes - for sure - this child will need all the suport she can get (although its a shame she didn't get it BEFORE this happened..)

Should be telling her daughter why this is in no way a 'good thing for her to have done'? Yes, I think she should be - you can do that without beating the child but it has to be made clear that this is going to impact her life, and everyone elses (including the baby) for the next 18 years at least and that's no small thing.

I'm a parent - I KNOW how having kids changes your life - but one thing I do believe strongly - kids want ADULTS as parents, not other kids.

What life experiences can an 11 year old impart to a child?

She has only just left Elementary school for heavens sake!

[Razor 0]

The youngest mother on record was a five-year-old Peruvian girl

[*Robert* 2]

Jay, no matter how you slice it... it is wrong in sooooooooo many ways.

Teen pregnancy affects the lives of so many people, including the unborn. How people can be so careless and immature. But wait, if they are teens, they ARE immature, and their parents are certainly part of the problem.

That mother should be taken out and stoned!

[Indo_mommy 0]

OMG!!!! That's just wrong!

[antone 0]

Not sure if you're joking here or not - or do you honestly think its good an 11 year old does these things?

Maybe its the use - or misapplication IMO - of the word 'pride' here.

What's wrong with her saying 'This is upsetting and not what I would have wished for her, but its happened and we'll deal with it by helping her as much as we can' That to me would be supportive without condoning the behaviour.

To me, and I suspect many others reading the article, it comes across as 'yes she's done well to get herself knocked up at age 11'

Should she be SUPPORTIVE? Yes - for sure - this child will need all the suport she can get (although its a shame she didn't get it BEFORE this happened..)

Should be telling her daughter why this is in no way a 'good thing for her to have done'? Yes, I think she should be - you can do that without beating the child but it has to be made clear that this is going to impact her life, and everyone elses (including the baby) for the next 18 years at least and that's no small thing.

I'm a parent - I KNOW how having kids changes your life - but one thing I do believe strongly - kids want ADULTS as parents, not other kids.

What life experiences can an 11 year old impart to a child?

She has only just left Elementary school for heavens sake!

Fundamentally, it's because one does not help one's children by saying nasty things about them to the mass media. This poor misguided (and yes, misparented) child has enough to deal with without her own mother insulting her in the Mirror newspaper.

[anya-D 8]

I'm afraid it was my child I would have said 'you're coming with me NOW' and taken her to the closest abortion centre, and then given her a choice between being grounded for life or going into a juvenile rehabilitation centre because she obviously has serious psychiatric problems to be acting out so incredibly young and she needs help.

And if the girl hid her pregnancy till it was too late to abort safely, then I'd have adoptive parents lined up for the kid. I'm utterly horrified at the idea of a child that young becoming pregnant and having a baby - she's not old enough to know the first thing about it. I'm sure she thinks that a baby will be a living doll, and you can guess who's going to do all the raising of it (and it won't be her)...

PS. the story should NOT be glamorised in any way, shape or form because it just encourages other stupid young kids to think they can get attention by playing at grownups...

feel the same...

[Jaylen Brit 0]

I dont think she got pregnant on purpose - I think it was ignorance and the fact her 'boyfriend' of 15 doesn't seem to know a. that at 11 she's a child b. what a condom looks like and c.to keep it in his pants (a lot to ask of a 15 y/o I know but even so)

Antone I do take your point - really - but the backlash the word pride will generate will be way worse than if she'd said 'no comment'

[*Robert* 2]

The youngest mother on record was a five-year-old Peruvian girl

Gee... I can only imagine who the "FATHER" was....

That's disgusting.

[thndrdancr 0]

I dont really know that that age is exceptional. I mean it IS, but you would be surprised how many 12 and 13 year olds give birth. I worked for Child Protective Services here in the midwest for 15 years, and I saw two generations come thru. It was so sad, we had several 12 year olds, and a LOT of 13 years an up.

Oh and btw, I didnt even know what sex WAS at 12! I started reading romances at 13 and then figured it out.

[*Robert* 2]

Fundamentally, it's because one does not help one's children by saying nasty things about them to the mass media. This poor misguided (and yes, misparented) child has enough to deal with without her own mother insulting her in the Mirror newspaper.

Maybe if the mother had been harder on her in the past, and less concerned about her "feelings", this wouldn't have happened in the first place.

I agree with Jay, this should NOT be glorified in the press as a feel good story just because the mother doesn't know how to raise her child.

Let's not forget the 15yo boy!!! I know there are laws that protect his identity, but if I was the father of the girl, I'd plaster posters of his face all over the place so he can't get other unsuspecting girls pregenant!!!

[aussiewench 9]

Jay, no matter how you slice it... it is wrong in sooooooooo many ways.

Teen pregnancy affects the lives of so many people, including the unborn. How people can be so careless and immature. But wait, if they are teens, they ARE immature, and their parents are certainly part of the problem.

That mother should be taken out and stoned!

I know this thread is about a 11 year old being pregnant...but the statement about 'teen pregnacy' and that they are immature and parents are certainly part of the problem is generalizing and that isnt always the case of teens.

Edited May 12, 2006 by aussiewench

[antone 0]

Maybe if the mother had been harder on her in the past, and less concerned about her "feelings", this wouldn't have happened in the first place.

I agree with Jay, this should NOT be glorified in the press as a feel good story just because the mother doesn't know how to raise her child.

Let's not forget the 15yo boy!!! I know there are laws that protect his identity, but if I was the father of the girl, I'd plaster posters of his face all over the place so he can't get other unsuspecting girls pregenant!!!

Yes - I'm not holding this lady up as some example of a perfect mother. Indeed, I don't even think it should be a story. But now that it is (and I have no idea how that came about) then I cannot see what is to be gained, from the daughter's POV, by having her own mother humiliate her in the national press.

To be honest, I'd postpone my decision over whether or not I was proud of my daughter until I saw how she dealt with the consequences of her actions. But I would never, under any circumstances, say anything less than 100% supportive of her to the mass media.

Edit to add: What I'd say to her in private would be very different, I assure you.

Edited May 12, 2006 by antone

[*Robert* 2]

I know this thread is about a 11 year old being pregnant...but the statement about 'teen pregnacy' and that they are immature and parents are certainly part of the problem is generalizing and that isnt always the case of teens.

You're right Lorelle, and I don't like to generalize about anything. All situations are different. It's just that in this particular case, I think you can attribute bad parenting as part of the cause.

Peer preasure is also a big contributing factor in cases like this, and let's not forget the boy. If he hadn't of had sex with her, she wouldn't have gotten pregnant!

[Indo_mommy 0]

This story scares me.

My stepson's girlfriend is 14 and I am just freakin' out that girl will get pregnant. Oh btw, he's 18 and my husband and I had tried our best to talked to him and given out examples etc etc but they're still bonking out (geesh I hate listening to them while hubby's at work & I'm home alone ) & seems like his ears are blocked. You think as a stepmother maybe I have a little right to talk with his gf's mother about this & ask if her daughter is on somekind of birth control?

Edited May 12, 2006 by OyenJames

[CanGal 1]

I think it is so sad. So many kids now adays what to partake in adult activities but they don't realize that if they do so they just might have to deal with adult like consequences. It is so sad and the question is why do kids not wanna be kids and why aren't parents being parents.

oh my oyen, they do it while your at home? man, my parents wouldn't hear of it, i would be kicked to the curb. Thats illegal too, ain't it, him being 18 and her 14? i don't know the laws that well here but thats what i assumed it was. And do her parents know? I would say you do have the right to go to her parents and talk about this with them. On some level of concern for the both of them.