MalaysianGirl

My intent is not to pass judgement actually just stating what will be obvious to the IO officer. The unfortunate events in her marriage does not change the fact that she choose to date and live with another man while married. This is why the recommendation of getting an attorney was given. Her situation was bad I get that, she is making it worse for both of you with her current living conditions.
She needs to get a divorce, then work on your relationship doing both at the same time only raises red flags of visa fraud.
Good luck but I would say untangle the situation first them focus on your relationship you cannot do one without clearing up the first.

Doing things right would start with not living or dating a married person. To answer your questions, K-1 does not apply she is already here unless she goes back home then she can do a K-1 or Cr1 if she gets a divorce and marries you. Good luck on the Adjustment of Status she is married and has been reporting your same address it will be very easy for an IO to put two and two together.
Side Note many VJ users frown upon immoral situations like yours.

Why not get married and have the woman and child return home? Then the newlyweds can file for a CR-1 spousal visa (and a CR-2 for the child). That will give them some 9+ months, until the visa interview, until they need the dad's permission. Engouh time for the dad to get used to the idea and visitation to be worked out, rather than presenting him with the possibility of never seeing his kid again.

Sarcastic? really?
No No - I was responding to yer I don't know what to think posit.
Queues are important. Circling a queue, even more so.
When a queue moves faster than last month, last quarter, is a great reason to learn WHY the queue is moving so fast.
This isn't the first instance of a queue moving faster than 'normal'.

Please remember that the foreigner is probably most homesick during the holiday season and we have to be extra sensitive to this. They left everything the knew and every comfort and family occassion to be with us. So, I am sure holidays are very painful to them. They are happy to be with you but lonely for the comfort of familiarity and family.
Let her know you are sorry that you were not more sensitive to her needs. Do not say she is sensitive---that just will make us more upset.
Good Luck

Honestly, Julio, it sounds like she's got you hooked around her little finger. I'm sorry if that sounds mean, but that's the impression I got when I read the above post by you. The quotes in RED are worrying, and the quote in green... do you really want to marry a woman like that? A woman with whom you're a good puppet?! She sounds like she's manipulating you emotionally. You say she's beautiful and kind-hearted... But how can she be kind-hearted if she accuses you wrongly of abusing her and belittling her and striking her, when it seems like all you do is LOVE her? In your words: "I still love her!"
In time you will realize that it is IMPOSSIBLE to live with someone and never disagree with the person, to never try and teach (educate) that person, to never ask that person for anything, and to never joke around. What kind of relationship is that, I ask? An entirely boring and manipulative one.
*Le sigh*... Dear OP, I hope you do not misunderstand what I am saying. I hope you get what I mean!
Also, may I ask, when did you meet her? After she got married to her husband?
Lastly, PLEASE take into very careful consideration JimVaPhuong's advice. I wish you the very best, Julio!

I completely understand and completely agree BUT Jim is right. When you marry someone from the Philippines, especially a girl, you are marrying their family as well. I don't know if you've discussed it but you should... I've attached a few threads for you to read. There's a few of them but they should give you an insight into what you're in for.
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/338298-arguments-about-sending-money-back-home/
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/341768-reporting-marriage-to-philippines/
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/280345-sending-money-to-your-wifes-family-for-hospital-expenses/
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/229124-married-filipinos-who-send-money-to-family-back-in-philippines/
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/286703-who-are-the-filipinas-here-that-received-money-before-getting-married-to-their-foreign-fiance-and-sending-money-when-they-got-here-in-us/
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/286702-filipinos-and-saving-money-for-retirement/
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/307709-am-i-cheap/
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/291307-filipina-wife-issuesadvice-please/
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/312176-is-wife-employed-or-unemployed/
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/322507-best-way-to-teach-my-filipina-to-budget/
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/332742-sending-money-to-the-family-back-in-the-phils/
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/336819-love-doesnt-conquer-all/
- http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/326788-filipino-pregnancy-talk/
You should also ask her about a "balikbayan box" which is sending stuff (not actually money, but clothing, homewares etc) to her family.
Her mother had 10 kids you said. That means you could be expected to help support her 9 siblings, her MANY neices and nephews, her parents, her grandparents (probably also the family in the US). You have to set boundaries from the beginning (as those threads would have shown you) and not send too much. A common thing is them needing money for "medical bills" or other house bills. There was some really mean ones where a guy divorced his wife because he came home from work to find her trying to send money from his account to her family after they'd already discussed it and when he asked "#######" she flipped out. There was another where the wife didn't know her family was scamming them until she found out the money they sent back for a business was used to by motorcycles and furniture and other stuff.
Anyway. Read up in the Philippines forum and even ask questions if you like about what you should expect and what questions you should be asking.

Careful. VAWA absolutely DOES require proof that the applicant entered the marriage in good faith. Also, a VAWA self-petitioner who divorces may be required to show proof that the abuse was the primary cause for the divorce. Most VAWA self-petitioners find it less complicated to postpone divorce until after the VAWA petition is approved.
Julio, I don't know where to begin...
Working. What she's telling you about Filipino women not working is bullsh!t. There are a LOT of Filipino women here in the part of California where I live. We shop for Asian foods at some Filipino supermarkets in the area. Heck, there's even a JolliBee burger joint here (if you don't know what that is then ask a Filipino)! Most all of the women who are old enough are married, and most all of them work. Every time I go to a local hospital better than 80% of the nurses are Filipino, and they are ALL immigrants - not second generation kids of immigrants. If she's telling you this is cultural then she's yanking your chain.
Million dollar romance. Anyone who spent a million bucks on trips to the Philippines was probably flying first class, getting the absolute best suite in the best hotel, and had a dozen hookers in his room every night. Even then, you'd be hard pressed to spend more than $100K if you went for two weeks out of every month for a year. The flights can be expensive - over a thousand bucks round trip, depending on the time of year. Everything else in the Philippines is dirt cheap compared to the US. Either he's lying to her, or she's lying to you.
Philippines and divorce. The Philippines is one of only three countries in the world that do not recognize divorce. The other two are Malta and the Vatican. A Filipino who marries abroad is considered married in the Philippines. A Filipino cannot obtain a divorce in the Philippines, though annulment is possible. A Filipino can have a foreign divorce recognized in the Philippines ONLY if the spouse was not a Philippine national, and the spouse initiated the divorce. Even then, it takes a COURT ORDER in the Philippines to have the divorce recognized. Bigamy is a crime in the Philippines, punishable by jail. If she files for divorce then she won't be able to return to the Philippines without risking getting charged with bigamy unless she becomes a US citizen first.
Ex-spouses assets. Unless he won the lottery during the brief time she's been married to her husband, it isn't likely that she's eligible to get ANY of his assets. Many people wrongly believe that a wife is automatically entitled to half of her husband's assets as soon as they say "I do". Those people have never actually been through a divorce. Most states only allow the divorcing spouses to split the "marital assets", which are generally defined as assets acquired DURING the marriage. Anything he owned before the marriage will usually remain his own separate property. There are some exceptions. For example, any money he earned while they were married is marital income. If he made mortgage payments out of that income then she might have a claim to any equity accrued in the home during the marriage. Likewise, if he made any car payments out of marital income then she might have a claim to half the percentage of the value of the car he paid off; e.g., if those payments added up to 20% of the loan, then she might have a claim to 20% of the market value of the car. "Entitled to his assets"? No. Not hardly. "Threaten to clean him out"? No way. In a marriage with a duration this short it's highly unlikely they would even order him to pay her any spousal support. I doubt she could get anything at all from him.
Illegal immigrants. Technically, an illegal immigrant is any alien who is unlawfully present in the United States, including someone who overstayed their visa. You're probably referring to people who enter the United States without inspection (EWI); i.e., they walk across the border.
Yes, unfortunately, VAWA can be used by an EWI to get a green card. The basic requirement is that they are married to a US citizen or permanent resident, and that the abuse occurred in the United States (with some exceptions). An odd dichotomy is that a K1 can ONLY get a green card through VAWA if they married the K1 petitioner, while someone who walked across the border could marry anyone.
Employment Authorization. An EAD is permission to work in the United States. Nothing less or more. There are no strings attached. If you're eligible to get an EAD then you can request one and get it. You aren't required to have a job offer in order to get it, nor are you required to actually get a job in order to keep it. As long as you remain eligible, you can renew it. An EAD is usually good for a year. Why anyone would need to renew an EAD more than six months in advance is a mystery to me.
You've obviously done a lot of research already. I recommend you continue to research, but take your time. She can't get any immigration benefits through you because she entered with a K1 visa, so there's no need for you to feel compelled to rush anything. Allow some time for the VAWA process to play itself out, and use the time to develop your relationship and get to know her better. You should ALSO get to know her family and friends, both in the US and the Philippines, as well as Philippine culture. When you marry someone from that part of the world you are marrying an entire family.

Sorry but refusing to work isn't cultural at all, it's something she's been told she's entitled to do because she's "pretty". The vast majority of Filipino's that I read on here are quite proud and enjoy working and contributing to their family. The man often earns more money, the Filipino might just have a part-time job, but they enjoy getting out of the house and having their own money to spend and the pride in working.
She's a contradiction in that she's denying your assistance now, but that just leads me to believe she is faking it. Forcing you to marry her quickly in order to rescue her, the damsel in distress.
I suggest she meet with more people from her culture and NOT her family. She will find that her family is steering her in the wrong direction. Relationships require mutual respect and effort. She needs to at least be OPEN to the possibility of working. What if *god forbid* you hurt yourself and are unable to work for a little while, she'll just sit back and watch you go into financial ruin? This is a pretty big issue in my opinion. It sounds like she expects to be worshipped and contribute nothing other than herself to the relationship... which I'm sure it itself is great but I prefer to be equals.
I don't mean to sound harsh but it sounds like there are still a few issues to work out. They might seem like cute differences right now but to give you the silent treatment when you don't agree with her? I hope she's able to chill out a little and i really think meeting with others of her culture, and not her family, will help her see the actual truths, rather than the lies and misinformation they're feeding her.

you don't respond to that. you respond with your heart of your feelings for Gretchen. if she doesn't accept it, there's nothing you can do.

I'm so confused right now, how did you even understand what that said?

There are very few visas that allow for a continuous stay of 10 years. Your fiance likely has a B2 visitor's visa. While the visa itself is good for 10 years, a single visit cannot be longer than 1 year by law. The length of each visit is determined by CBP when the alien enters the US, and they rarely approve anything more than 6 months for a B2, and often approve less time. There should be an I-94 form in his passport that was stamped by CBP the last time he entered the US. The stamp would indicate how long he was allowed to stay in the US.
Once again, just for emphasis - the I-94 determines how long he can legally remain in the US. The visa doesn't determine this.
How me managed to stay for 4 or 5 years, return to Mexico, and then reenter the US is a mystery to me. An overstay of more than 180 days automatically results in a 3 year ban from the US. An overstay of more than a year automatically results in a ban of 10 years. The ban should have begun the day he left the US to return to Mexico. I'm really surprised they allowed him to reenter. Maybe they didn't know he'd previously been in the US for more than 4 years. Maybe they simply made a mistake. Maybe he didn't enter through a regular border crossing, and simply walked across the border.
You really need to pin him down on this. If he should have gotten a ban when he left the US then he won't be able to adjust status without an I-601 waiver. If he didn't enter the US through a border checkpoint then he's not eligible to adjust status - dead stop.

You misunderstand what a 10-year visa is. That means it is valid for 10 years for trips... coming and going. Each stay can be a maximum of 6 months. It is not a visa to live in the US for 10 years.
He was here for 5 years 2000-2005 illegally which means he has a 10-year ban. I am unsure how he was allowed back in to the country in 2005 - he should have been denied at the border. That makes me wonder if he entered illegally - jumped a fence.
Illegal work can be forgiven for spouses of US Citizens, but if he stole a SSNumber of made one up or claimed to be a USC, that is not forgiven.
He was already married. I wonder if the wife refused to file for a GC and that is why he left her.
You have already been scammed for one greencard. Are you sure this isn't another? There are a lot of red flags.
If you're sure it's legit, then you will have added scrutiny. Also, if he jumped a fence this last time (because he should have been denied at the border for overstaying) then he cannot adjust status period.

You have serious issues, dude. Yes your story has changed. And the lady dying has nothing to do with the story. Your story is short: you got fixed to marry a USC, paid her, ####### happened in the US and you got caught. The End.

I was wondering about that when I read your earlier post... but didn't say anything

I am not an expert on marriage or even immigration. these are hunas handling these cases and they could conclude any way. Since you are yet to meet him may I suggest going to meet him for the first time witout any marriage plans( I am sure both of you can handle that ) get memories of your visit and then make another trip later after which you can then decide to marry, give it few months, during which you can still do more visits as you can afford (again on the premise that legalizing the union is what is more important to you not the wait time) and file your papers after that. A year of knowing sounds reasonable to me( note , to me)

I read the entire soap opera and I will say what I have to say. If you think I'm being judgemental or worse... go ahead.
This whole ####### pisses me off beyond understanding and I'll tell you why. When the "guess the country he is from" started, roughly after page 5, MENA/ muslim countries were the first on the list. I went thru all legal avenues to get my fiancee, from Egypt, approved. The main reason we did is because we love each other genuinely and we want to get married. There was no need for third parties or marriage brokers. I proceeded with caution, later to find out, he was proceeding with caution too. And that was a relief, I must say.
All this said, the first question that comes to my mind is, why on earth is a 22 year old involved with marriage brokers and other immigration workers (putting it lightly)? BECAUSE HE WANTS TO MIGRATE! If a 19 year old blonde hottie came to his life thru a marriage broker, HE SOLICITED HER (or at least someone to marry for immigration purposes). The 3rd party didn't put a gun on his head, neither did she, to marry her. So, the victim story is b#$%^&*t. There, I said it.
The second question that comes to my mind is, why on earth this story is full of patches to victimize himself and minimize his involvement, including to the extent of claiming drug usage... and what not? Because he knows he is guilty of fraud. If you are in the country and you are a victim, you call the police and build a case. You do not divorce and find a new wife, who I will dare to call a new victim.
I am not apologizing telling it like it is. If I sound harsh, so be it. But like the previous poster, I have 0 tolerance for #######, and that goes on both ends: the USC and the immigrant. Like the 99% of us here, we do things right and some of us, even so, get denied.
So to the "victim": stop dancing around the truth and tell it like it is, or start looking for another war zone to live in.

I don't know whether you're telling the truth here. Your story is all over the place and it seems that you struggle in explaining it, which makes people suspicious. This may be an even more important reason for you to get a lawyer. A CO has minutes to make a decision, and if you come across as scattered as your posts are, it's not going to help you. I'm not trying to insult you here, we all have our strengths and weaknesses, but when you have a controversial case like yours, you absolutely need to be clear in how you communicate it (and of course honest). Get professional help, or that money you spend on a visa is likely going down the drain.

I'd agree that there is sometimes a holier than thou attitude on this board, but welcome to the internet. You have to account for the fact that a lot of people here are under a great deal of stress dealing with this process, and someone who has circumvented it in the past is likely to trigger a visceral response. If you want to be understanding and non-judgmental, you have to apply that same thinking towards those who speak out about what they consider to be bad behavior. Either judge everybody, or no one.
I also think there is some value to the holier than thou posts. Many folks who have posted something that has triggered this kind of response lack a certain degree of self-awareness, and having some feedback on how they or their case is perceived can be instructive when dealing with consular officials.

Idk if u are referring to me??? Yes I do believe God is the only judge.... If u have read on futher down the post I apologized if I came off as judgemental but as in there is freedom. there is a freedom to opinions of all wether we agree or disagree... what I'm sick of is the way dialogue comes across and reduces to a deameaning level. I am no superior than the next if that is your thoughts... Im not asking of approval or validation for how I feel about a particular subject FRAUD is FRAUD... In which he admitted to but is now trying rectify his situation and process the right way... And my husband is not american so the native english you reference to I understand 100%. eh? We all have a chose including me I dont have to read or respond to a post that I'm fed up with or sick of... Anyway I'm not going to go back and forth on this fourm... I stand by how I feel about FRAUD MARRIAGE... my feelings of this matter does not add or subtract to the outcome of this case... And I refuse to belittle myself and reduce to anything but a mature dialouge... Im not much for labeling and name calling left those days back in high school and college.... I was asked the question by the poster and what I meant by my comment I merely answered it and gave my reasons... * sighs* and signs off...

How sure are we that this person is not trying to get us to help him to commit another fraud? He lied to a CO thats why he was denied.
When I have a 2yr old daughter at home and have to be finding evidence of a 4 yr old relationship so that my daughter can have her father in her life every single day I am not gonna help someone who went through the wrong tunnel find his way to the right one. He should have done things legally like everyone else... If his new relationship is real be honest on every single application. Don't lie. That's what got you where you are right now. If you are honest then everything will work out for the best

Thousands of people per year come to the US to get married.... they don't need a visa to do so. Think destination weddings. USCIS has nothing to do with the POE. It's always up to the CBP Officer. They have the ultimate say-so on who they allow to enter the US. The OP is not saying they are bypassing the immigration route. The are doing things legally.
They cannot see an application at the first point of contact. But if the OP brings a copy of the application and is honest about it, that is always a good sign to them that the person is going about things the right way.

Consider applying to a Canadian University or college since you qualify. Tuition is not nearly as expensive as in the US and you can get the most moderate temperatures on the west coast in British Columbia. Your parents don't like the cold so they don't want to go back, but you might find that there are places in Canada where the weather is not as bad as some places in the US. Southwestern Ontario is another option, although they do get snow and winter, just not as much as elsewhere in Canada.
There is no legal option in your current circumstances for you to remain in the US. Yes, it sucks and yes, it seems unfair that you have grown up here and now have no way to build a life here. You do have choices though and one of them is moving back to Canada - a choice that many people around the world would love to have and don't. Going back to school in Canada may give you the qualifications you need to return to the US through the NAFTA treaty, or on an employment visa. Why not try to make that your goal, then? Getting the skills and education you need that will make you welcomed by the US, if that is still your goal after you have obtained those skills. You might even want to do some research now to find out what skills are most in demand in the US and aim yourself towards that end.
Will it be easy? Nope. Will it happen immediately? Again, no. You are young and you are dealing with circumstances over which you have no control, so the best thing to do is to try and control what you can and move in that direction. You have options in Canada - take advantage of them. Being successful in life, whether it is in Canada, the US or Iraq - or any other country - comes from recognizing the circumstances in which you must operate, and then figuring out how to do it so you get where you want to be. You might have to end up dealing with cold weather for several months of the year. So what? You'd have to do the same if you were living in 50% of the US as well. Try to recognize the opportunities that come disguised as challenges and you may be surprised by how much you are able to accomplish with your life. Believe me when I say that the goals you have today may very well change over the coming years. Life is not static You may find that life outside of the US is also very satisfying and fulfilling. Good luck to you.

People are telling you to go to Canada because you are a Canadian citizen and you'd have better opportunities there, not because they are being rude.
I understand you want to stay here. If that is not possible, you need to figure out a new plan instead of clinging to the old one. There are good Universities in Canada.
Stop wallowing in what was supposed to have been...start planning for what will be! Your future is bright.
Good luck.

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