Aya820

Best answer to this since it is specific to his particular insurance plan is to contact them directly and ask if her immigrating is considered a life-changing event. If the insurance plan says yes, good to go, if they say no, full stop. Insurance is a private program and outside a few required mandates they make their own rules.

you only can add family members to the insurance health plan in two occasions:
- life event: birth of a child or marriage: you have 30 days from that date to do so
- during the enrollment period in November.
you could've added your wife to your plan even if she did not have a SSN.
your employer is right: IT IS TOO LATE NOW and you have to wait until the enrollment period opens in November 2014 for year 2015.
I made that mistake before.

Cutting it close is better than missing the deadline. Go to that appointment armed with all documentation. If you can remember details of the phone calls or if you happen to have notes take those along as well. One thing my Mother taught me was to sit down, write the date and time on the top of a notebook and when the person answers you write down their name. If transferred you write down that person's name and the time of the transfer and the time when they pick up the phone. You make notes of your questions and the answers given. That way you have a detailed record to show someone at a later date. It is all about documentation throughout this entire process. You never rely on the person on the phone doing anything for you. Always send in a piece of paper. Granted that piece of paper has to get put with your file, but if you can show that on such and such date I mailed this to you (show a copy you made and the receipt showing delivery) you have a much stronger case.
You failed to send in the requested document asked for in the RFE. By the USCIS' rules that implies that you abandoned the petition. Now you have to fight to get the petition re-opened or start all over again. So I would go to the infopass appointment with what they asked for in the RFE and more and see what happens.
I hope it all goes well for you,
Dave

DO NOT get the PCC until you have your case# assigned. It could be days or weeks before your case even arrives at NVC, That its entering you in system than case# and the AOS side gets processed first.
If you live in Lagos you could get police report same day otherwise a few days to a week.
And it will be expired before interview so you will need a new one.

But part of moving on is also taking responsibility for your part in decisions... It takes TWO people to get pregnant... It is not just a case of HE got you pregnant... Pregnancy takes two people, if YOU did not want to have a child, then precautions should have been taken, therefore, it is also your responsibility to take ownership of of your decision. Sorry, but this is a sensitive subject when I hear women blaming HiM for,getting THEM pregnant. Unless it was a forced sexual encounter, then you BOTH had a part in it... Just as your tolerance to his cheating and forgiving him time and time again has put you in an terrible position... When you take ownership of decisions, you can learn and progress.. And make better ones. I am not meaning to be harsh, but you see the man for who he is now, divorce and move forward... Be strong... Learn from the mistakes you made, not from the ones he made...

I am only making guesses because you really don't offer much information. Your documentation could have been lacking. The attitude and demeanor of your fiance' could have raised concern by the CO. And, as stated above Nigeria is a high fraud country. There could have been one of a number of reasons or simply concern of The CO for the denial. Sorry to hear about this.

Have been a member of both groups since they basically started.....is there drama? Sometimes
If there are scammers in the group they choose to remain silent. If you start to post crazy,somebody usually picks up on it and alert the admin. We've lost and welcomed many

Hello everyone,
missed this site so very much, but my husband arrived on July 2,2013 thru JFK. This journey, has been long and emotional, but I THANK ALMIGHTY GOD for HIS blessings. We paid the $165 Visa Fee on July 12, and GC arrived after 3 weeks. SSN arrived a week before GC. He is anxious to start a job, and we've hit the pavement looking and filling applications. We are working together to make our marriage work. My prayer is for every one of you to be with your loved ones....Please take care of yourselves.

I imagine there are quite a few people on here who would be happy to be able to pay a bond for a visitor's visa to come and visit their spouse or fiance in the US. Or to have their parents come and visit them for their wedding etc.
Especially if at the moment the alternative is that it's almost impossible for them to get a tourist visa.

Me? Feel? Really?
OK - I'll bite.
I feel that if I have to pay a bond to do something that I always wanted to do, then I'm going to pay a bond to be granted the priviledge to do it.
However, with the supposed thousands of folk from those 6 countries historically abusing the system in the UK - it makes perfect sense (to me) to have the bonds posted.
Who's to blame? The fellas that gamed the system, prior.

Your husband and these lawyers have some things in common. Self interests.
Ghana is certainly different than America. But if I understand this right you are in America, living as an American citizen. Why not use that fact to do what you need to do as an American citizen?
Why not just go to the family court house where you live and get some factual, useable, free information that will apply in an American court? Having him served? Yes you have to attempt that. Ask the court or your sheriff about the laws regarding that subject. You will probably find that you have to make a reasonable attempt to do so. Like sending a document to his last known address.
Or you can deal with another lawyer in a far away country that would love to hear from your bank account.

I have read posts like this many times here and it was always possible that the USC was able to divorce here, especially if the spouse was nowhere to be found.
There is no sense going on a wild goose chase in Ghana paying a lot of money for a lawyer if it is indeed possible for you to divorce on your own right here, no matter where
you married.
What I have read here is conflicting information with what the 2 lawyers told you. I would go to the court house and ask there. Tell them he has disappeared
and is nowhere to be found which is abandonment. Should not be complicated.

So sorry you are going through this unfair mess.
This happened to me. 16 months in AP, then denial. No factual reason, 12# of evidence, myself at the embassy as evidence during AP...on and on...
Co said "Convince me." We brought 12# of evidence and CO said "I don't have time to look through all that."
Me: " What more do you want ?"
CO:" I can't tell you that."
1. Involve your senator immediately.
2. Be there for the next interview.
3. Bring everything and the kitchen sink, affidavits from friends and family attesting to your bona fide relationship, wedding plans.
4. If refused again next time ask to speak to the section chief.

We did all that and it did not help us. Hoping you have better success.
After you are over the shock and tears, kick it in gear with a plan of action and eventually you will be approved. They like to see you navigate an obstacle
course. Don't get me started ... sigh !

It is hard not getting through the interview when you have so many dreams about the days that follow. I have been through that, cancelled wedding plans , cancelled family travel , creams tossed out. You will come back, you just have to play the immigration game a bit longer because you landed on the square that says go back 3 spaces. It doesn't mean you are out, just a bit slower to the finish line and in the grand scheme of things it is just a bump. Marc Ellis is a good idea, he is getting very good at knowing the idiosyncrasies of each embassy. Joseph and I got hit with a total denial for what I think was the worst of reasons but now that is just a moment in our lives and he just got his US citizenship. Be strong

I already told you that frontloading or not does NOT change your processing time. The time has to do with current petition load at the service centers and changes from month to month. There is not a way to go faster.
Furthermore, speed should NOT be the goal. The goal should be getting a visa, which is the whole point of the process. Sending in a bare bones petition for the idea that it will go faster, just to be denied your visa at the end for lack of a bona fide relationship is pure foolery.

Fortunately I didn't rely on them to deliver the package. I put a big note, highlighted in yellow with red lettering, to hold for pick up and contact the recipient upon arrival of the package. They texted him when it got there. Don't know if this would work all the time, but it worked for us. Being that USPS is by far cheaper than DHL/FedEx and from other VJers experience, this is as good a route as the other couriers for the package to make to its destination or not. I believe it is a 50/50 chance with any of them.

Lovenigarmostyle.......my friend and sista !
A big happy dance for your hubby's approval after 4 long years of this journey.
You fought and kept it real all those years and finally got your blessing on July 4th when he touched the ground ! Imagine you went out with a
bang....July 4th....lolzzz. You both never gave up on your love.

I am thrilled beyond words to see you together now. To look at him every morning and ask "Are you really here ?" to having to pinch yourself
to believe that your journey is finally over.
All the tears, all the difficulties and stress and strains that this journey causes was worth it all.
May you live happy as can be and I know you both will. It has been a wonderful friendship with you and
I appreciate your help and encouragement and always being there for me. When I feel like and and not to forget like
and and you have been there my dearest friend and bring a to my face and make me almost pee my pants doing this .
You are an awesome lady and deserve the best and now you enjoy each other !
Love from all my heart to both of you

Thank you Ladies. It was with the help and support of good friends and sisters like you that we were able to stay focused and on track even on the hardest days. VJ is hellish at times and we all could get overwhelmed and discouraged BUT with friends like you it was doable when it seemed impossible. Thank you sooooo much from both of us for this heart warming message. What a blessing it is to read these sweet messages.
I am blessed to call you friends. It is our objective to continue to help and support the new members with our knowledge and experience, so we may assist them in their VJ. Both of you among other VJ members are angels among us. Caring and giving when needed to those who feel the pain, the sorrow and the heartache of being in VJ. Selflessly, you have taught so many here and elsewhere what you have learned through trials and errors.
Thank you. I am humbled by your friendship and kind words. Blessing and may you find happiness and peace in your individual VJ as well. <3

Oh yes the phase II of why isn't he here yet and why do you have to always be the one to visit him and why can't he visit here and why should it take so long for him to get here and he could get here sooner if he really wanted to.......blah blah blah
Yes it never ends. Now again, some questions are asked out of genuine concern or interest and I am HAPPY to answer those. But the ones where they are implying somthing bad - those really annoy me.
But as for your visit - there is nothing quite like that very first time you see each other in the airport. Your days of getting to know each other in person instead of online and on the phone are very special times. It strengthens your relationship and you really get to know each other and you also get to learn about his country and his culture and his family. It is a special time. Don't let others ruin it for you.

Having pressure and stress from friends and family around you are just the beginning when you want to visit. It never ends during your
visa journey. You have to convey that you are very confident and that you know what you are doing. If they detect any doubt they are
on you like crazy to deter you.
This comes mostly from a place of genuine worry and care about your well being and safety but get confidence across and they will soon learn
to trust your own judgement.
Phase 2 of pressure will come with endless questions of 'Why isn't he here yet?' and assumptions. Brace yourself

I am feeling the urge to buy a new trolling motor,
You should not have been given any of the things you mention but you know that. I feel that a few clerks need some re education.

When you are ready to send in the new I-129f you can always post a new topic here and give us a list of documents you are including and we can let you know if it looks good or if you are missing anything. Good luck.

PS:::
It has become certain people's objective to be brutally honest, despite most times such advice is not even necessary or helpful. They hide behind the mask of 'being brutally honest' when actually they enjoy the 'brutality', not the 'honesty'

Oh my precious Sis Debbie (I am a Debbie also). I feel your pain and I so totally understand. First you got his citizenship pulled thats about all you can stop. Do what Darne;l said and write that letter to USCIS so at least its on file.
Lets go through some things about you so you know you are precious and wonderfully made dear. (freelancing cuz I am going this myself).
1. You will go through your 5 cycles of grief and beat yourself up. DON'T beat yourself up, or blame yourself.
If you can look yourself in the mirror and know that you gave your marriage all that was in you and you gave out of a loving true heart. Baby the will of another person is not your fault. he had a choice he choose wrong not your fault.
Forget people who want to point their finger and blame you because you didn't see the "Red Flags". Isn't it funny how outsiders always say "girl I saw the red flags, I saw it coming".
I have had so called friends say "your husband I knew he was a user or i knew something was up with him". But you remained silent WOW. (sorry i digress).
2. You dared to love another and give them unconditional love. Even when your gut was turning you trusted in that person and gave them the benefit of the doubt.
Isn't that called agape love and what Christ ask of us as humans one to another.
Where did that suddenly become a crime. Gosh are we to measure our lives by everyone's elses failures. We are human we make mistakes and judgement calls.
I dare say anyone reading this thread is mistake free in life and love. So please don't let strangers, family or friends make you feel bad or less than because you dared to believe, trust and love.
3. You do whatever it is you need to do to move forward and heal.
The people who say "get over it" "move on" "forget him". Well if it was that easy. Well it would be easy. I suggest counseling (I know I will be seeking it),
Unless you have a great network of family and friends who aren't the "I told you so's", limit who you confide in cuz many times others insecurities become yours and instead of healing now you are saddled with others mess and you feel even worst.
4. Forgive him this will be very key to your healing trust me on this.
Doesn't mean what he did doesn't matter or you can forget. It means as a woman of God I forgive you because I refuse to let this pain consume me.
5.. He was your husband and its okay to say you love him.
Why do people think you married satan. This is someone you not only petitioned and went through all this but you married had started a life with him. Why does it seem odd to say "I love _________". I forgive him I love him but I am moving on. Hey you may get to the point you wish him God's blessings and the best.
People always want to talk about karma and all that when we should be asking God to come into their lives and touch them and turn their life around so they never hurt another person. But thats a whole nother level there (Just saying)
I am sure your inbox is filling up and you have some really great people here that have similar stories (I thought I was the only one on earth for my situation). It's wonderful to see how some people have been so misused and abused and played and yet God had a better blessing for them. It was a divine setup.
You will get your swag back (i stayed in bed a week and cried until my daughter literally peeled me out of bed and made me shower. LOL) and you will love, laugh and smile again. I know i look forward to that someday. But in the meantime. Do whatever you need to do to heal.
Thank you for blessing us and being brave to share your story. Who knows who you saved from horror. God bless you Debbie and all the best to you.

imo, for what's next..
1. file for divorce . seek an attorney if you think it necessary
2. find a good therapist (no, i'm not kidding)
3. rebuild yer life (this will take some time)
4. contact yer older brother, warn him about this fella, ask him to warn others locally.
5. fire off a letter to USCIS (again) noting the divorce .
6. update yer address with USCIS (immediately)
That's it, for now...