david&who?

On 11/13/2022 at 8:31 PM, Jorgedig said:

Sounds like you're already considering petitioning  another young woman from overseas?  Just keep in mind that in a relationship where such a large socio-economic inequality exists from the get-go,  you might run into similar expectations down the line.  

 

Why not look for someone more local?

Because I don't find the local women attractive? I am not running into another relationship. Just wanted to know if I do are there any penalties I face?

On 11/14/2022 at 8:13 AM, Rocio0010 said:

Yeah and also... why not take a break and enjoy being on your own for a while? I love my hubby to pieces, but one should be able to just be single and be happy with it.

Because I have never been alone and it suck?

8 hours ago, powerpuff said:

~~ Topic moved from K1 Progress Reports to Process ~~
 

Sorry to hear it didn’t work out. But you saved yourself from more heartache, money and time lost. I would call it a blessing in disguise 

 

No additional steps.

 

Regarding petitioning again and multiple filer waiver, here is what it says on USCIS site;

1. You are filing this petition on behalf of your fiancé(e) and you previously filed Form I-129Fs on behalf of two or more fiancé(e) beneficiaries; or
2. You are filing this petition on behalf of your fiancé(e), you have previously had a Form I-129F approved, and less than two years have passed since the filing date of your previously approved petition.

 

Id say neither of them would apply to you.
 

 

Totally valid wish. I’d be careful if you do rekindle your relationship and want to petition her again. Please think about it thoroughly and have a heart to heart where you make it very clear to her about your stance and your boundaries.

 

 

Not going to rekindle that relationship.  That bridge was burned.

 

 

 

Okay, so my fiance decided she didn't want to go on with the K1 visa process. I had filed on May 27, 2022. Received I-797C acknowledging receipt of the application May 25, 2022. I sent a notarized "letter of withdrawal" on 10/13/2022 to the California Service Center.   I keep checking MyUscis and there has been no update. Now I know they take forever to do anything but... I tried calling someone but of course could never get through to a human being.  Is there an additional step I need to take?

Will this affect any possible future K1 petitions? I know what you're thinking, don't jump back in.  I have heard of a WAIVER, Is this something I can request at this point?

I have also heard of a 2 year ban on future applications. Any truth to this?

For those of you curious why my K1 went array here you go. My fiances family, once they knew she was engaged to a "millionaire American" began moving in the her apartment with her. First a cousin, then a niece, then the eldest sister.  Now, me being American didn't think this was a good thing.  My fiance was going to need more family support $$$ but I was less than willing to support the entire family. She began getting requests daily from friends and family to send them "load". The three additional family members did not work and offered  no financial aid of support. (They were all broke)

When asked if I could triple her monthly support I replied that the problem was not "inflation" but her lazy-###-bloodsucking family members. (Of course I didn't voice those actual words but but I wanted to) To make a long story short my fiance became cold and within days she said she "just wanted to be friends".

I had warned her that her family members would try to break us up as I knew they were jealous of her for many reasons.

Any answers to the withdrawal process? 2 year moratorium?

P.S. In hindsight I realize that I dodged a lifetime bullet as her family members would have ALWAYS been in need. While I wouldn't mind helping out in an emergency I don't want to support the 18 member family for life.

Broken-hearted...Dave

2 hours ago, RO_AH said:

David, you came to the wrong place for this. If you need info on immigration specifics, there is a great wealth of knowledge. While there may be some truth to what is posted, there are many here that love to go over the top with their judgment of you without knowing anything about you. Is the age gap big? For me, yes, it's outside of my comfort zone, but I am not about to judge you for it.

 

Now my opinion, I do not think it will be a huge issue at the Embassy. Taking a bunch of pictures holding a newspaper is rather pointless, they just need to see your passport stamps with the dates you were in country. What will be more important is pictures together and also lots of pictures with family and friends and time spent together.

 

I am in one of those relationships that most posting before me say are impossible, and don't exist. Me and my wife have a 25 year age gap. We have been in a relationship for 11.5 years. We are coming up on our 5th wedding anniversary. We have 2 beautiful children together. My wife has zero interest in getting citizenship and would much rather be living in the Philippines. The sooner I can retire and move us back to the Philippines the happier she will be. I will be pushing her to get her citizenship mostly because both of our son's are dual citizen's. She has never once in our relationship asked me for anything. Luckily I had 2 previous girlfriends in the Philippines that are like everyone here described. They taught me how to spot someone that is less than genuine so I value those short lived relationships.

Mahalo for the kind words.  Yes, I can see that VJ had changed since the last time I really used it 12 years ago.  It's full of judgemental people making snide remarks. Making statements that they know nothing about. I will not post anything here again.  I'm done with VJ.

2 hours ago, Boiler said:

The age gap seems a non issue, after all he has experience in this.

Now that's a rather inappropriate and judgemental comment if I ever heard one. Coming from you Boiler, I am shocked.

8 hours ago, Daphne K said:

Exactly this!

 

if we would take out the general statement of Filipino men being horrible (and I am sure there are still plenty of stable, loving Filipino men out there), would a 21 year old Filipina pick a 65 year old Filipino man who can provide her with the same companionship, stability, etc.? I don’t think so..

 

We see similar situations with middle aged (US citizen) women and young men from certain African countries. Not all of these cases are the same, but you get my point.

 

USCIS will scrutinize your case, I think you already know that. Especially because a pattern is starting to develop. 

 

I NEVER said that all Filipino men are horrible.  I have heard this from many people (dozens I have personally spoken to not just my fiance. Men and women included.)

14 hours ago, ROK2USA said:

In a previous post you mentioned your partner worked overseas... has she moved back to the Philippines now or is she planning on working overseas again?

Be aware there is a huge backlog for K1 visas in Manila and currently it is taking 13 months for the K1 petition to be approved so you're looking at maybe 2 years or so before she can move to the US. 

If she is going to interview somewhere else it might be a little shorter.

I would consider either living with your partner during those two years to see if you are fully compatible and forget about the K1 on file. Or maybe consider getting married in a third country of via Utah and filing the spousal visa. . . 

But, maybe you should play it safe and file the K1 in case the CO doesn't believe the relationship is bonafide. Easier to walk away from an engagement as opposed to a marriage. 

She does not work overseas and never has.  She lives in the Philippines.

3 hours ago, Ontarkie said:

TO close your account follow this link https://www.visajourney.com/timeline/account-management.php

This is not the account I wish to close  I want to close my old account. Not DaveAndRudyLove account.

8 minutes ago, TBoneTX said:

An unnecessarily judgmental post has been removed.

Thanks for staying on top of this .  I really appreciate it.

20 minutes ago, Timona said:

 

I did read some where $2500 per month..

 

But hey, if you're happy, I will be for you. Until then, take it easy....

Oh yeah I forgot.  I pay her 1000 a month for 4 years to buy out her share of the house.  Only 50k for a 750,000 dollar home on Maui.  So I currently pay her 1529. a month. I stand corrected.

36 minutes ago, MarJhi said:

Obviously if you are mentioning the age gap issue then you already have an understanding of the problem, or potential problems. If USCIS questions something, it's because they have seen it a million times and have a pretty good idea where it is going.

 

Since you did it twice, can I ask if you were specifically seeking someone with that much of an age difference or was it just happenstance both times?  Why not find someone with more life experience?

No, honestly I was looking for an older woman but had no luck. Many of them were "stuck" in a marriage to a man who had deserted her and their children.  Many were Separated, and that's a disaster in the Philippines.  I had no luck.  I was actually introduced to this girl by my trike driver in the Philippines.  He had a friend who's sister just moved from the Provence to the city and he introduced us.  No dating sites this time around.

Search youtube for David Olsten. You can see the story, the engagement party, etc.

3 minutes ago, Timona said:

See, I read you other thread. You mentioned she left you right after becoming a USC. Think twice and hard this time around. I'm not bashing you but I don't want you to go to your grave early due to a second bird flying away.

 

In my honest opinion, glove aside, the first lady definitely used you and this second one is gonna do the same thing. We all see it coming and also saw that the first did exactly that. This new one will toy with you till she gets to US and leaves, just like the first. In my post history on VJ, I've never defended anyone. You're the first and I'm trying to help you see it clearly. 

 

Advice: Move and pitch camp in the Philippines. Your two kiddos will be fine for 2 or 3 years. Talk nothing about US and pitch tent. If after the 3 years she's still by your side, then petition. I'd rather investigate for 3 years than have her here in 3 years and she leaves and you're divorced again after she gets her first GC. 

 

And don't let this new one start telling you about kids. People nowadays, will have a kid for the sake of immigration...I mean, they are gonna get one in the future anyway. So why not with USC and "use it as good evidence of strong relationship?" This is in quotes because it's a common myth. 

 

 

With all due respect the first Filipina did not use me.  We were married for 8 years. She had her green card and US citizenship after 2 years of marriage.  We had two children, after the US Citizenship together and were very happy.  After having the second child my then wife suffered extreme bleeding in the hospital and went CODE BLUE.  Emergency surgery, ventilator, the whole works. Complete removal of all her her female parts, uterus and Fallopian tubes.  She survived and we were very happy but she became a different woman.  She refused and still refuses to take the female hormones that her doctor prescribed.  This is when our marriage started to go down the tubes.  And I didn't lose much in the divorce.  She wanted very little.  I only pay 529 dollars a month child support.  So she was not a bad person. She was the only one who couldn't see the changes.  I actually feel bad for her but she refuses to take the meds.

3 minutes ago, Timona said:

 

All of them want to come to US. I understand and have no issue. However, I'm sure there are great men amongst them but since there's a huge trend of many Filipinas marrying USC, most of the Filipinas are now parked at these busstops waiting for the bus to come and take them to a better land. Be careful. Don't be used. 

 

You're the bus. 

Busstops here just refers to waiting for USC, someone like you

Thanks, I appreciate your comments.

10 minutes ago, Ryan H said:

Moved from K1 Process & Procedures to Site-Related Discussion.

Mahalo Ryan

5 minutes ago, mytruelove18 said:

All i can tell you that you are almost in the same boat again. If i were you, i stay at Philipine and live there, and see for how long the love of her for you will last.

just to see how she react, tell her that you change your mind about she comes to America and that instead you are planing moving there for good, and whatch her how she will take it.

i am pretty sure once you tell her that she wont be happy. And kepp tell her that for some months and you will see

I would love to and planned on living in the Philippines but I have two beautiful children here now and could not leave them.  I have mentioned the idea of both of us living in the Philippines and she has been enthusiastically positive about that option also.

Just now, Daphne K said:

I don’t know if you are crazy, I’ll let you decide that on your own! 
Just hope that this one works out better for you.. 
You mention that you know that “age is not the deciding factor for young ladies”, what do you think are the deciding factors? 

Security, trust, love, structure, companionship...  All of the Filipinos I have spoken to say that they don't want to marry a Filipino because they are notorious for leaving for another woman, or they just don't want to take responsibility for the child/children.   I know for a fact that this is a common problem in the Philippines leaving many single mothers to fend for them selves.  No alimony, child support, spousal support or responsibility for the cheating boyfriend/husband.  And since the Philippines has no divorce these poor girls are stuck in limbo, never able to marry another.  It's tragic.

4 minutes ago, Timona said:

I see no barricades. 

But you may be on hook for the I-864 in the first one. Is the first already a US Citizen?

 

And were the children yours? 

Yes I have a 5 year old daughter and a two year old son. They are my pride and joy.  They are my kids for sure.  We had to do IVF because I had undergone a vasectomy years ago.  We share custody 50/50.  She became a US Citizen within two years of arriving in the US.

Okay, so my Fiance is 21 and I am 65.  I know this is a huge age gap however in the Philippines age is not the deciding factor for young ladies.  Does the US Embassy know this or are they going to give her/us extreme scrutiny at the interview?  How do we prepare for this? We have provided evidence with our initial filing of us being together in the Philippines. We have provided evidence of our engagement, including the Manager of the Hotel who wrote a letter, on hotel letterhead and stated that he was present at the engagement surprise.  We have provided photos together holding up 4 newspapers with the dates on them.  I also provided my boarding passes, etc...  I know the age gap is huge and maybe I am crazy but I believe that my fiance loves me just as much as I love her. 

(In 2013 I went to the Philippines and married a 19 year old girl and brought her to the US.  She walked out on me after 8 years of marriage and two children. I never saw it coming.)  Our divorce was finalized in January 2021.  I knew I could not marry in the Philippines again  as they do not recognize  US Divorce, hence the K-1 visa this time.  Tell me, am I crazy?

I know this used to be nearly impossible but just thought I would check.  I just filed the k-1 petition and was thinking it would be great to get my fiance over here for a visit with no intent on her staying here, with her returning to the Philippines as we await the at least one year process.  Is this possible these days?  Just checking...

David O