TBoneTX

Biden Calls On Deplorable Garbage Nazis To Tone Down The Rhetoric WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a renewed effort to lower the political temperature amid the lead-up to the presidential election next week, President Joe Biden called on all deplorable garbage Nazis to tone down their rhetoric. The plea came during a late-night address from the White House, as Biden urged former President Donald Trump's vicious, extremist, domestic terrorist supporters to stop using such derogatory and divisive language to describe their opponents. "Listen up, you Nazis. Here's the deal," Biden said. "Dangerous, inflammatory rhetoric has no place in our political discourse. That's why I'm calling on all of Donald Trump's nasty, disgusting, disease-infested, Hitler-loving, supporters to knock it off. Got it?" [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/biden-calls-on-deplorable-garbage-nazis-to-tone-down-the-rhetoric

Read the last line of this piece. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Trump Scores Coveted Endorsement From Hefty U.S. — In a huge boost for the Trump campaign coming into the final week, garbage bag company Hefty announced they will officially be endorsing former President Trump. "It's such an honor, a tremendous honor," said Trump. "To have the backing of so much garbage, such wonderful garbage, it means so much." [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-scores-coveted-endorsement-from-hefty

Report: Millions Of Garbage Bags Seen Lining Up Outside Polling Stations U.S. — In a bizarre sight, tens of millions of garbage bags have been reported gathering outside polling stations across America, eager to cast their vote for former President Donald Trump. "It's the craziest thing. These garbage bags started lining up 6 a.m., and they just kept coming," said election worker Dave Stanton, surveying the mile-long line of garbage. "That's some seriously motivated garbage." According to exit polls, a remarkable [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/report-millions-of-garbage-bags-seen-lining-up-outside-polling-station

Even if you're not crazy about Pres. Trump, his 5-minute video here is completely funny. I watched it twice and laughed in the same places. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LEGEND: Orange Vest-Wearing Trump Tells WI Crowd Hilarious Story of How Garbage Truck Ride Came to Happen [...] as the media and Democrats were busy coping and seething over Trump keeping Biden's "garbage" insult of Trump's supporters in the spotlight, the former president had even more fun with it during the campaign rally, telling the hilarious story of how the garbage truck ride came to be, and how everything happened very fast. At one point, he joked about how [...] https://redstate.com/sister-toldjah/2024/10/30/watch-trump-cements-absolute-legend-status-telling-story-of-how-the-garbage-truck-ride-came-to-happen-n2181321

HOT TAKES: Reactions to Trump's Garbage Truck Troll Are Terrific, As Dems Cope and Seethe You probably knew it was coming. President Donald Trump -- the master of trolling -- would have a good response to Joe Biden calling Trump supporters "garbage." Indeed, he did, sitting in a garbage truck on Wednesday, calling out Biden for insulting millions of Americans and having a lot of fun in the process. He already showed he has a talent for this with his McDonald's success. That was about serving the people. This time it's about cleaning up Washington. What a great symbolic move it is. [...] https://redstate.com/nick-arama/2024/10/30/hot-takes-the-reactions-to-trumps-garbage-trump-troll-are-terrific-as-dems-seethe-and-cope-n2181318

Can you believe that it's been 50 years? This is a wonderful piece to read. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The 50th Anniversary of The Rumble in the Jungle [...] David versus Goliath was a colossal mismatch! Just not in the way we're expected to imagine. And this brings us to October 30, 1974: The Rumble in the Jungle — the legendary showdown between undefeated George Foreman and an overaged, past-his-prime Muhammad Ali. [...] https://pjmedia.com/scott-pinsker/2024/10/29/the-50th-anniversary-of-the-rumble-in-the-jungle-n4933768

Duplicate thread is now closed in favor of discussion elsewhere.

ABC 'Mistakenly' Releases Tuesday's Election Results for Pennsylvania: Harris 52%, Trump 47% Well, this is awkward. ABC released the results of the 2024 presidential election in the must-win state of Pennsylvania during the Formula 1 Mexico Grand Prix telecast. And with 100% of the precincts reporting, the Keystone State went to… Kamala Harris! She captured 52% and Trump only 47%. How 'bout that? [...] https://pjmedia.com/scott-pinsker/2024/10/30/abc-mistakenly-releases-tuesdays-election-results-today-harris-52-trump-47-n4933802

Great! ~~~~~~~~~~ Trump Trolls Dems, Drives in Garbage Truck The Democrats' political dumpster fire just got worse, as Donald Trump hilariously replied to Joe Biden's "garbage" insult by driving in a garbage truck "in honor of Kamala [Harris] and Joe Biden." This week, the trashy tyrant Joe Biden angrily condemned a pro-Trump comedian's joke about Puerto Rico's garbage problem by sputtering, "The only garbage I see floating out there is his supporters." As with Hillary Clinton's "deplorables" crack in 2016, MAGA has already embraced the insult. And master troller Trump took a ride in a garbage truck with a massive campaign banner on the side. [...] https://pjmedia.com/catherinesalgado/2024/10/30/trump-trolls-dems-drives-in-garbage-truck-n4933803

We need more threads like this.

Is Garden City better?

Agree with you. In addition, while reading it, I was reminded of how Woodrow Wilson presaged 0bummer in decreeing that the deplorables (of then and now) should be ruled by their betters.

That chick is great!

Stop clubbing baby seals! Stop clubbing, baby seals!

Scintillating Wednesday repartee*, yawn man. *Bad still-lurking Asia! Bad, BAD still-lurking STILL-LURKING Asia! ------- Thrilling Wednesday report, see man: Embedded ourself at half-past 2 a.m., night owl we man. Lay awake in stomach discomfort until finally dealing with it, oh poop man. Re-embedded ourself at half-past Many (2+2) a.m., really sucky hour man. Text (ignored) later awoke us, we man. Finally ex-bedded ourself at half-past Many (2x2x2 +2) a.m., delinquent we man. Mini-B. kept out of skool again, cough wee man. Ex-Mrs.-T-B. took him to CVS clinic and was recommended cough syrup, ingest wee man. Went to Costco Business Center, shop we man. Left with exactly the items on our list, self-disciplined we man. Breakfast/lunch/din-din (at Many [2+2] p.m.) was Modified Tuna Glop, ingest we man. Got e-mail from Mini-B.'s Band director, John Philip Sousa man. Band concert scheduled for precisely the eve we were to be out of town, man. Rearranged flight/car/hotel + 2 appointments, rearrange we man. During intense rearrangement process, Mama T-B. phoned us Many (2+1) -- si man, Many (2+1) -- times, man. Nothing formally scheduled for Thursday except Hallowe'en, no man. Party with the rubias tonight, cavort we man. And that was/is our thrilling Wednesday, report we man.

It is Wednesday, and close to Election Day, so here is our politically oriented Semiofficial Semiweekly VAWA-Thread Joke: =========================================== A POLITICIAN IN THE VILLAGE A politician visited a village and asked what their needs were. "We have two basic needs, honorable sir," said the villager leader. "First, we have a hospital, but no doctor." Upon hearing this, the politician brought out his phone. After speaking for a while, he told them, "Don't worry -- a doctor will be here tomorrow. What is your second problem?" "Second, sir, there is no cellphone reception anywhere in this village."

JD Vance Warns Millions Of Women May Vote Under Influence Of Menstrual Madness CINCINNATI—Moments after he frantically nailed two-by-fours across the closed door of the bedroom he shares with his wife, vice presidential candidate JD Vance issued a dire warning Wednesday, alerting the public that millions of women may vote under the influence of menstrual madness. "If they are permitted to cast ballots, then we risk allowing the next president of the United States to be chosen by this crimson menace," said the Ohio senator, who [...] https://theonion.com/jd-vance-warns-millions-of-women-may-vote-under-influence-of-menstrual-madness/

Dead Bird On Sidewalk Leads Man To Contemplate Own Inevitable Collision With Plate Glass CHICAGO—Realizing there comes a time when everyone crashes into a window, local man Danny Nagler told reporters Wednesday that a dead bird on the sidewalk had led him to contemplate his own inevitable collision with plate glass. "Seeing this bird's lifeless body lying here on the pavement, I can't help but be reminded that someday I too will slam headfirst into a large pane of glass at great speed," said Nagler, pondering how [...] https://theonion.com/dead-bird-on-sidewalk-leads-man-to-contemplate-own-inevitable-collision-with-plate-glass/

NASA Discovers Potential Life On Mars After Giant Eyeball In Middle Of Planet Looks Directly Into Telescope BALTIMORE—In what astronomers called an alarming yet compelling observation, NASA officials announced Thursday the discovery of potential life on Mars after a giant eyeball in the middle of the planet looked directly into the James Webb Space Telescope. "We are excited to share telescopic evidence of a colossal, audibly blinking eyeball on the surface of Mars, a finding that suggests extraterrestrial life may be present," said NASA administrator Bill Nelson, explaining that [...] https://theonion.com/nasa-discovers-potential-life-on-mars-after-giant-eyeball-in-middle-of-planet-looks-directly-into-telescope/

Wife Breathes Sigh Of Relief After Voting For Trump In The Privacy Of Her Voting Booth Away From The Watchful Eye Of Creepy Feminist Husband OVERLAND PARK, KS — A local woman reveled in her secret exercise of freedom today and breathed a sigh of relief after voting for Donald Trump in the privacy of her voting booth away from the watchful eye of her creepy feminist husband. The woman, who asked to remain anonymous to avoid drawing the ire of her stay-at-home husband, said she felt a sense of pride and duty as she cast her vote for Trump, something her husband would never approve of if he knew. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/wife-breathes-sigh-of-relief-after-voting-for-trump-in-the-privacy-of-her-voting-booth-away-from-the-watchful-eye-of-creepy-feminist-husband

Wife Baffled Why Heater Keeps Shutting Off When Temp Reaches 140 Degrees BROKEN BOW, NE — Local wife and mother Dana Fallcrest is baffled by the behavior of her home's heater, which she says keeps shutting off as soon as it hits 140°F. "It's freezing in here!" Fallcrest complains daily. "I can't believe this thing won't get hotter than 140°. How do people live like this?!" [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/wife-baffled-why-heater-keeps-shutting-off-when-temp-reaches-140-degrees

AOC's Boyfriend Getting Real Sick Of Her Calling It A 'Mini January 6' Every Time He Leaves His Socks On The Floor NEW YORK CITY, NY — Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez accused her boyfriend of doing yet another ‘Mini January 6th' again this week after the congresswoman found his socks on the floor. "Riley is a good guy and all but I can't believe he continues to commit these little insurrections right on the bathroom floor," Ocasio-Cortez commented. "Every time I see those socks I tell him 'Sweetie, I love you, but remember how I literally died on January sixth?' Those socks are so triggering." [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/aocs-boyfriend-getting-real-sick-of-her-calling-it-a-mini-january-6-every-time-he-leaves-his-socks-on-the-floor

Cast Of 'The View' All Getting Rabies Shots After Being Bitten By Whoopi Goldberg NEW YORK, NY — The entire cast of the all-female talk show ‘The View' was forced to get rabies shots this week after Whoopi Goldberg bit all of them. The incident occurred after Goldberg said on-air that Trump would banish interracial marriage if elected. Following her comments, she then ran around the studio biting all members of the cast and crew, prompting doctors to rush on stage and give everyone a rabies shot. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/cast-of-the-view-all-getting-rabies-shots-after-being-bitten-by-whoopi-goldberg

California Man Arrested For Showing I.D. To Vote LOS ANGELES, CA — A local early voting precinct was briefly thrown into disarray today, as a man was arrested for showing his I.D. to vote. Authorities said Justin Davis arrived at the voting location at around 9:00 A.M. and presented his driver's license to horrified poll workers who immediately called the police to report the blatant act of racism. "There's no place for this type of lawlessness in California," said Los Angeles Police Department spokesperson Sgt. Paul Marquez. "We received a tip that there was a man showing his I.D. to vote here, which is a brazen violation of California law. Our officers arrived quickly to apprehend this monster. I'm just glad we were able to get him off the street before he could show his identification to anyone else. This place just keeps getting more dangerous." [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/california-man-arrested-for-showing-id-to-vote

Nevada is now lost. Unbelievable. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Marc Elias Celebrates That Nevada Will Count Non-Postmarked Ballots 3 Days After Election Day Kamala Harris campaign lawyer Marc Elias is celebrating a defeat for the RNC in Nevada, whose Supreme Court has ruled that mail-in ballots without a postmark can be counted up to three days following Election Day. We don't know what the Nevada Supreme Court was thinking, but we don't see how this contributes to election integrity. [...] https://twitchy.com/brettt/2024/10/29/marc-elias-celebrates-that-nevada-will-count-non-postmarked-ballots-3-days-after-election-day-n2402976