Imported Filipino brides share the ups and downs of settling in America

[We Keep Receipts 9,238]

Semantics. And irrelevant.

While relation and relationship refer to the connection between two things, relation shades more toward the way things are connected, while relationship refers to the connection itself. The difference is not spacious.

Both can mean the way in which two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected;

in addition, relationship can mean the state of being connected.

If you think Vol is speaking along these lines, you know him better than we do. I read his comments as being pretty shallow in regards to women. It's almost like you're disagreeing with Val just because...

[decocker 7,198]

If you think Vol is speaking along these lines, you know him better than we do. I read his comments as being pretty shallow in regards to women. It's almost like you're disagreeing with Val just because...

thank goodness i'm not delusional.

[DavenRoxy 1,073]

If you think Vol is speaking along these lines, you know him better than we do. I read his comments as being pretty shallow in regards to women. It's almost like you're disagreeing with Val just because...

Not at all. Does your opinion of Vol's post change depending on which word is used? I know mine does not.

[We Keep Receipts 9,238]

thank goodness i'm not delusional.

I thought there was a misunderstanding about relationships and relations, that would explain it more clearly to me.

Not at all. Does your opinion of Vol's post change depending on which word is used? I know mine does not.

Yes, because there's a HUGE difference between relationships and relations in my mind. If you say I've slept with 1200 people, I'd be like ok. If you tell me you've had 1200 relationships, I'd look at you with raised eyebrows...

[DavenRoxy 1,073]

Yes, because there's a HUGE difference between relationships and relations in my mind. If you say I've slept with 1200 people, I'd be like ok. If you tell me you've had 1200 relationships, I'd look at you with raised eyebrows...

Either (0r both) would most likely be braggadacio, and meaningless. Now let's get back on topic. Or is there one?

Prolly not. This is CEHST, after all.

[GandD 5,966]

Of course there's another aspect to all of this..... Age. Frankly, I feel bad for Americans that get married in their teens/early twenties. Some of my fav memories in my life were during those years. And I learned a lot about relationships. The concept of marrying a foreigner at that age and leaving all of your family and friends for a far away country where you're an extreme minority and probably not the best with the native language or culture is a difficult one at best. Maybe life is better or your children will have errrr opportunities. I'm just not convinced late teens early 20s men or women have the experience to embark on that type of journey without regrets. But hey, some folks aspire to be a virgin on their wedding night. I've always felt sorry for the ones that did. And it's no surprise the ones that wait get married so young.

[spookyturtle 9,465]

Hey not all of us. I met my wife while she was visiting for a conference. Hung out with here that weekend and just never stopped. I would have thought (initially) more of these relationships would have had similar stories. This web site, if anything, has really opened my eyes to what's going on with marriage visas. I really had no idea people did stuff like this.

I met my wife by chance too, here in the US. I was not looking for a relationship nor did I have any intent to get married. It was just like previous girlfriends only she was from another country.

Of course there's another aspect to all of this..... Age. Frankly, I feel bad for Americans that get married in their teens/early twenties. Some of my fav memories in my life were during those years. And I learned a lot about relationships. The concept of marrying a foreigner at that age and leaving all of your family and friends for a far away country where you're an extreme minority and probably not the best with the native language or culture is a difficult one at best. Maybe life is better or your children will have errrr opportunities. I'm just not convinced late teens early 20s men or women have the experience to embark on that type of journey without regrets. But hey, some folks aspire to be a virgin on their wedding night. I've always felt sorry for the ones that did. And it's no surprise the ones that wait get married so young.

I feel bad for anyone who gets married.

[The Nature Boy 4,224]

it doesn't matter, you brought it up. promiscuous people seem to gravitate toward other promiscuous people. none of this concerns me. like marv said, i was just pointing out the difference between relationships and relations, cause vol claimed to have had 1200 relationships and know women well as a result. whew.

I will give you this. The difference in relationship and relations is a fairly basic easy to understand principle

Bill C did not say, I did not have a relationship with that woman, he said he did not have relations.

I might add, that I don't think he was serious when he said that. I took it as joking.

[rlogan 2,036]

Of course there's another aspect to all of this..... Age. Frankly, I feel bad for Americans that get married in their teens/early twenties. Some of my fav memories in my life were during those years. And I learned a lot about relationships. The concept of marrying a foreigner at that age and leaving all of your family and friends for a far away country where you're an extreme minority and probably not the best with the native language or culture is a difficult one at best. Maybe life is better or your children will have errrr opportunities. I'm just not convinced late teens early 20s men or women have the experience to embark on that type of journey without regrets. But hey, some folks aspire to be a virgin on their wedding night. I've always felt sorry for the ones that did. And it's no surprise the ones that wait get married so young.

A perfect example of hubris in thinking you know other people's lives better than they do.

I don't question why gay people love each other and say "Oh, I feel sorry for them " nor do I spout off pity for Christians or Muslims or people who love city life, people that eat grasshoppers or want to be married as virgins or an endless list of other choices people make by the millions.

Posing yourself as needing convincing is exactly what is wrong. What relevance does it have that I don't dig sodomy? Some people have foot fetishes or dig super humongous boobs. They spend money on expensive bottled water or think Slab City is the best place on earth to live. Not only do I accept it - I can celebrate their choice. Hooray for gay people. Hooray for inter-racial couples. Hooray for immigrants .

Fortunately, you aren't in charge. The law protects people - fully legal adults by the way - from needing your permission to do what adults have the legal right to do. They can vote, die in battle, marry, drink, screw, and both law and custom grants them the respect you don't have for them.

Speaking as you have demonstrates an incapability of putting yourself in other people's shoes. Not that you would understand, but look how these Filipinas are viewed by their friends, families, neighbors, etc. - they are superstars. They are held in high esteem. They become the matriarchs of their families. The person people go to for counsel.

Those are the eyes people look through to understand them, not through the disgusting, fabricated pity of an article like in the OP. The author had zero interest in reporting from the Filipino perspective.

[GandD 5,966]

A perfect example of hubris in thinking you know other people's lives better than they do.

I don't question why gay people love each other and say "Oh, I feel sorry for them " nor do I spout off pity for Christians or Muslims or people who love city life, people that eat grasshoppers or want to be married as virgins or an endless list of other choices people make by the millions.

Posing yourself as needing convincing is exactly what is wrong. What relevance does it have that I don't dig sodomy? Some people have foot fetishes or dig super humongous boobs. They spend money on expensive bottled water or think Slab City is the best place on earth to live. Not only do I accept it - I can celebrate their choice. Hooray for gay people. Hooray for inter-racial couples. Hooray for immigrants .

Fortunately, you aren't in charge. The law protects people - fully legal adults by the way - from needing your permission to do what adults have the legal right to do. They can vote, die in battle, marry, drink, screw, and both law and custom grants them the respect you don't have for them.

Speaking as you have demonstrates an incapability of putting yourself in other people's shoes. Not that you would understand, but look how these Filipinas are viewed by their friends, families, neighbors, etc. - they are superstars. They are held in high esteem. They become the matriarchs of their families. The person people go to for counsel.

Those are the eyes people look through to understand them, not through the disgusting, fabricated pity of an article like in the OP. The author had zero interest in reporting from the Filipino perspective.

Yes you're the victim, it's quite understood. I have my opinion and I was in fact not born yesterday.

[Jacque67 7,328]

Talk about judgemental!

[Jacque67 7,328]

The price of fame. Marrying an old bore in order to become a super star!!

[Operator 1,925]

Relations with your relations is another topic all together.

[elmcitymaven 9,711]

Talk about judgemental!

I don't really understand the motivation behind it. G couldn't imagine it for himself. That's cool. I was a baby bride myself and moved to another country. It was a fantastic adventure I don't regret. Yeah, I missed out on a lot of what people work through on their own during the post-adolescent years, and I ended working through that 15 years later. But I wouldn't have done it otherwise.

In short, there's ways of expressing disagreement without being quite so judgmental. I don't understand the motivation for being unkind in doing so. Whether it's intended or not, it comes off as defensiveness. If something works for you, own it and eff everyone else. They're below your regard and do not signify.

[zuluweta 250]

I just saw a mail order bride movie on Netflix called Love Me, except it features women from Ukraine and American men. It was interesting! Some women were scammers or just didn't have a connection with the men but some eventually came to America and seemed to be successfully married.

The worst was the Ukrainian woman with 2 kids who essentially married a South African-Australian man in Bali so she and her kids could have a free vacation.