Are we completely insane?

[gimygirl 0]

i think you can safely put everyone's fears to rest once your fiance(e) comes to the US and you marry and have been successfully living together happily for awhile.

they care about you ... that's why they worry. love does not equal happily ever after. many have been burned, used, and abused ... but the same can be said for same-country marriages ... only time can tell.

best of luck to you!!

[silly_chick 0]

Oh well... I'm still having serious issues with my family, especialy my mother. She could never understand why I would want to be with a man 20 years older and from another country. Oh, I met him on the net too, and of course that means that I'm not quite normal and probably should have been going out more. She has said so much about me and my relationship, that I really give up - I just hope she will understand after a while.

My parents' biggest concern was that my hubby wanted to rip me off and somehow through me steal all their money. Before I left for CA to do my studies (and my folks knew that my sweetheart was going to move to CA as well - to be with me!!! Woo Hoo!!), my dad had clearly stated that he was not going to support my husband and pay his bills. What a BS... It was hard to convince them of our good intentions, mostly because something like that had happened to their friends before - their daughter married a guy from another country, and eventually he stole $500,000 from her account and disappeared, after verbally and emotionally abusing her for nearly 8 years. I imagine, it's hard to have faith in people after something like that. I just hope they will see how happy I am in time.

Friends were mostly okay with my choice, though, except for the fact that it had all started on the net

Best of luck to you!!!

[CarolineM 0]

Ummm at first my parents were wary of me getting married at all - but they've known Stewart the whole five years I have. I think it is different for me since we met in person.

I guess i've had it easy.

[almaty 19]

i think an adult must make the decision based on his/her potential happiness..if it is not supported by family and friends..that is their opinion and should not effect a person's decision unless they are emotionally dependent .....brother dean

[irishgirl73 0]

My family is the opposite................they wonder why he would want to come here to be with me

My parents think he is a saint! If they only knew

[UmmSqueakster 54]

When I went off to Egypt alone the first time, family thought I was insane and would be kidnapped as soon as I landed. My mom came up with a safeword for me to say over the phone in case I was being held hostage, so they would know they had to rescue me.

Then when they realized that we were serious about gettin married, mom decided that my entire immidiate family (parents, brother and sister) needed to take a vacation in Egypt to meet his family. As soon as we landed, mother complained about everything and anything. It's a third world country, of course there will be donkey carts blocking the road and the shower won't be like a holiday inn!

Now that we're here together and married, they still have a bit of trepidation, still think we're insane, but they're opening up slowly. At this rate, we'll be welcomed into the family as normal members some time in the 2020s.

Yup, we're insane and lovin it

[flipside 0]

I've been working in different locations overseas for almost 10 years so it was no surprise to any of my friends or family.

[Miranda&James 8]

It's a miracle my parents let him come here in the first place, I mean, I was only 16 when he came to visit!

I still get looks from people when I say I met him on the internet. Once I say 6 years ago they tend to be like, o ok, he isn't some guy you met a month ago and could be some weird stalker

Same here!! But I was 18 and not 16.....but treated like a 14 y/o

Well, I can understand them just trying to look out for me

I've never even asked James how his parents felt about it......

[irishgirl73 0]

Some of my friends have met their s/o on a website, even if the person lives a town away or an ocean apart-when you know you have found that person-you just know

I think people will always be a little skeptical about long distance relationships(especially when it involves green cards/the immigration process or whatever). I am vey lucky, my friends and family have been extremely supportive. They may worry about all the stress involved, but they know that I woudn't be going through it if he weren't worth it! I think his family feels the same way.

[ChristinaM 0]

I dated a guy in Virginia for a while which my parents heartily disapproved of, partly because we met online and partly because he had some, shall we say "issues" which were not compatible with my plans for the future (like a lousy pot habit).

I met my hubby whilst we were working on a cruiseship together, and once they'd gotten over the initial shock my parents have been great. They're actually flying into Portland on Friday to meet Chris for the first time, so keep your fingers crossed for me!

[Sinergy 3]

My parents expected it from me since we lived all over the world my whole life anyway, and for me to stay in one place and not move to other countries was just not me, so they figured i would meet someone somewhere other than USA.

His whole family took it great. We all got along the moment we met.

[Marilyn. 340]

my family was supportive I guess... they were all a little shocked when I told them I was going to fly by myself to go meet him.... I have no idea what they might have said behind my back and I know things were probbaly said ... I know my mom

but when he came for a visit 3 weeks later and met my family they all liked him... my mom says he fits right into our family (hubby said he isn't sure if that is a good thing or not )

his family didn't really know about us until right before the wedding.... his brother's knew he was seeing me but they didn't know it was serious and his parent's knew a little about me but not much .. he lived with them for a few months and they knew he was talking to someone ..... his sister was shocked when she found out about the wedding ... she hadn't known anything about me really and she had a talk with David , asking him if he was sure he wanted to get married....

but now his family really likes me, I think... I know his mom does.... a few weeks ago she said to David, "make sure and take MY Marilyn out for a nice dinner" I thought that was soo cute... his parents didn't think it was strange at all about how we met or anything....

[ktun 0]

Very similar situation to silly_chick regarding my parents. Met my husband online, he's 20 years older than me. Mum was NOT impressed to put it mildly. Said things like it was disgusting and suggested that I needed mental treatment, that it was unatural and unhealthy, and why wouldn't I get back with my ex, he was so nice and the same age, etc. Things between us were very bad for a while. They weren't at my wedding, which was painful and my sister still has problems with it and we haven't spoken really since I got married.

However, I think they're slowly coming around to the idea. They flew into Chicago to spend a few days with us between Christmas and New Year and they've even invited us to stay for a month in April/May, so that's got to be progress, right? Also talked about having some kind of ceremony in England for us during that time. I think the key has been that they're got to know my husband now and see that our relationship is good and strong etc.

Good Luck to all

Kate

PS//There is a precedent in my family for age gaps, my grandpa is 20 years older than my grandmother, and their marriage seemed to work out just fine.

[Satisfaction 1]

To make the long story short. My Dad is French-American. He met my mother, a French-West Indian from Guadeloupe. Together they travelled to Puerto Rico, Panama, San Domingo, Venezuela, and much, much later, they settled in Guyana where my brother and I were born . My husband is African and my children French-African-American. I guess insanity goes in our genes. Celebrate diversity.

[Married_my_love 0]

OMG Marilyn that avatar is hysterical!!

Ok, so you might have read about what my boss put me through during my "work review" where I was practically interrogated and told that my then fiancee was marrying me for a green card.

Then a good friend told me on my birthday about a friend of hers who got married to a canadian and the girl got the green card and then claimed abuse. So she was sure that it was going to happen to me. All i could say was "dogs have eyes. does that mean everyone who has eyes is a dog?" she just said HUH? BTW she is married to GUESS WHAT? a canadian. BA HA HA!

Then my 2 best friends came over and watched our wedding video. When it was over I looked at my one friend who was bawling, and my other friend said "OH MY anyone who doubts this guy loves you needs to see this video!!" My husband never stopped staring at me the entire service, except to do the candle thingie. It really is cute that he looks so HAPPY during the service.

The funny thing is, my mom, the one person I was afraid to tell, embraced the whole thing so wonderfully, not a peep, negative thought, concern. I think she was just SO EXCITED that I finally got married.