Non-Muslims married to Muslim MENA

[Rocketta 0]

I just wonder what are some the issues non-muslims have run into in their relationship with the Muslim MENA?

[funkyab 0]

Although I am not a muslim or non-muslim married to one, this is a question I am very interested in. I have seen many interesting answers in this forum. Just earlier i thought the pets/animals in the house issue was informative.

I am currently in Denmark on holiday/business with my wife and we just had this discussion tonight over dinner with friends talking about muslims in denmark, muslim immigrants, and danish culture.

[S and S 12]

I had converted to Islam before I married my husband, so it helped a lot. There are cases where it works though. It is important to discuss your differences in ideas and opinions with your spouse. Me and my husband discussed a lot before marriage and still find some things after marriage, but most are cultural differences more than religious.

[Sofiyya 1,687]

I just wonder what are some the issues non-muslims have run into in their relationship with the Muslim MENA?

The non-Muslims here talk about this all the time. It's the Muslims married to non-Muslims that are ever so rarely heard from. As a Muslim, I'm curious about them, too.

[SaadBell 0]

The non-Muslims here talk about this all the time. It's the Muslims married to non-Muslims that are ever so rarely heard from. As a Muslim, I'm curious about them, too.

Excellent question, I would like to know also.

[Aymsgirl 0]

I would like to hear about musims being married to non muslims and some of their issues. Being the non-muslim with a muslim we have had some issues but nothing that we have gotten upset over. Basically, him having to explain to me or myself to him and then we normally come up in agreement without each other having to give in. Mainly these have been over our son and raising him but we agree hand in hand over the way this will and should be done. I am sure thought that marriage will offer more obstacles to overcome for both of us.

[S and S 12]

If we can count culture into this conversation. There is one argument me and my husband had about if we had a baby girl and whether he ears would get pierced. I guess in the middle east they like to pierce their ears as babies. Some in America do it and that is their choice, but I don't want it for my daughters (inshallah I have them). I was forced to get my ears pierced at age 4 and hated it. My mother couldn't get me to keep my earings in. Once I was about 9 years old I did want them so my mother had to take me again, but I appreciated them more that time. Mostly, I worry about it causing an infection if I do that to my daughters when they are babies and I don't like to force them into such a luxury without their consent. My husband thinks I'm silly for it, but I know this argument may come back someday if we do have daughters. At least I can prepare my arguments even better by then.

[catknit 144]

I think it depends on the people in the relationship and how they choose to handle it.

A little background about me - I'm non-muslim who married a muslim [he is a 1st generation USC, his family is Palistinian], I didn't convert even though I was asked to constantly. I divorced him because he had control/anger issues - his religion had little to do with our relationship breaking down. Im no shrink but his dysfunctional family and cultural issues had a lot to do with his anger....being in a mixed marriage takes a ton of work and compromise is paramount.

I learned a lot about his faith/beliefs and will defend them whenever, where ever to whomever - even today.

As God would have it, or fate, or kismet, or whatever you want to call it- my SO is muslim also. And I must admit I've thought maybe this is a sign from God to convert. Then again my SO's ex is Christian, so maybe he's the one God's trying to speak to....

[Bassi and Zainab 1]

As God would have it, or fate, or kismet, or whatever you want to call it- my SO is muslim also. And I must admit I've thought maybe this is a sign from God to convert. Then again my SO's ex is Christian, so maybe he's the one God's trying to speak to....

That was soooo funny. So, which one of you will listen? Sorry, I went off topic but it was so funny to me.

Not to complicate things, what about if you are both muslims but you practice more or less strictly? Like wearing hijab or not wearing hijab, those kinds of things.

Edited April 16, 2008 by Bassi and Zainab

[Rocketta 0]

All very good questions. I know when I was in Jordan, I took a back seat and let my husband do all the talking but I know that when he gets to the US it will be reversed. I just wonder how he will handle it. Only time it became a problem for me was when I got mad because he wouldn't tell me what the shop keepers were telling him the prices were.

[sereia 0]

Although I am not a muslim or non-muslim married to one, this is a question I am very interested in. I have seen many interesting answers in this forum. Just earlier i thought the pets/animals in the house issue was informative.

I am currently in Denmark on holiday/business with my wife and we just had this discussion tonight over dinner with friends talking about muslims in denmark, muslim immigrants, and danish culture.

I've read a lot about on going issues in Denmark regarding the Muslims there. A growing issue all over Western Europe. I'm curious what your dinner discussion with Danish people said (but I wouldn't post it here if I were you! lol)

I'm also a non-Muslim married to a Muslim. I wish he would come here and post his opinions about being married to ME versus what I have to say. Maybe someone will come along and post. What about you, VT? You were once married to a non-Muslim yourself, right?

[sarahaziz 0]

Before we had problems over his beliefs (40 virgins theory, 4 wives for pleasure purpose) he explained it was all useless/untrue information and whoever believed in that was nuts. That was pretty much the obstacle. He thought before I would convert but I've made it clear I will never leave Jesus for Islam. It's really not fun and games with religion mixing with the Jesus isn't God just a prophet/ Jesus is God arguement. If you don't stand your ground as a christian woman (if any are) men will try to conform you. If you don't have what you really believe in then what do you really have? Those are my personal thoughts. Good topic. God bless.

[cieloazul 0]

If we can count culture into this conversation. There is one argument me and my husband had about if we had a baby girl and whether he ears would get pierced. I guess in the middle east they like to pierce their ears as babies. Some in America do it and that is their choice, but I don't want it for my daughters (inshallah I have them). I was forced to get my ears pierced at age 4 and hated it. My mother couldn't get me to keep my earings in. Once I was about 9 years old I did want them so my mother had to take me again, but I appreciated them more that time. Mostly, I worry about it causing an infection if I do that to my daughters when they are babies and I don't like to force them into such a luxury without their consent. My husband thinks I'm silly for it, but I know this argument may come back someday if we do have daughters. At least I can prepare my arguments even better by then.

If you do have your daugher's ears pierced when they are babies, your husband should agree to check on them, hold them, walk them, etc. whenever they cry regardless of the time of day or night.

[S and S 12]

If we can count culture into this conversation. There is one argument me and my husband had about if we had a baby girl and whether he ears would get pierced. I guess in the middle east they like to pierce their ears as babies. Some in America do it and that is their choice, but I don't want it for my daughters (inshallah I have them). I was forced to get my ears pierced at age 4 and hated it. My mother couldn't get me to keep my earings in. Once I was about 9 years old I did want them so my mother had to take me again, but I appreciated them more that time. Mostly, I worry about it causing an infection if I do that to my daughters when they are babies and I don't like to force them into such a luxury without their consent. My husband thinks I'm silly for it, but I know this argument may come back someday if we do have daughters. At least I can prepare my arguments even better by then.

If you do have your daugher's ears pierced when they are babies, your husband should agree to check on them, hold them, walk them, etc. whenever they cry regardless of the time of day or night.

Thankyou, I had been thinking the same thing. I will not go against my husband's wishes, but I will make it his responsibility since he wants it and I don't.

[Krissy! 0]

good topic to discuss....

I am a Non-Muslim engaged to marry a Muslim man. We have talked about it -- I am a self-acclaimed curiosity queen. He says our own faith is our own business, and should practice what we want and can. I told him about local mosques (I was pretty excited finding one). I asked him what he thought of my non-practicing habit. Generally, he's not really chattive about this topic...

I AM curious to hear from Muslim married to Non-Muslims. I also think the cultural differences will be a major factor.