TBoneTX

Canada Orders Toronto Blue Jays Players Euthanized TORONTO — Following the team's devastating loss to the Los Angeles Dodgers in Game 7 of the 2025 World Series, the Canadian government announced that it had ordered the players from the Toronto Blue Jays to be euthanized. As is standard procedure in Canada, people who have outlived their usefulness and no longer provide the expected value to society are promptly scheduled to be exterminated. After failing to bring home a championship, the Blue Jays' roster was deemed to have reached the end of the line. "It's what's best for all parties," said Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney. "They had a great run, they almost pulled it off, but the harsh truth is that the Blue Jays are now more of a drain on resources than what they provide. It's a difficult decision to make, but [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/canada-orders-toronto-blue-jays-players-euthanized

One participant flagged for using AI to answer a question and for resurrecting a stale thread. The OP's timeline shows approved naturalization, so this thread is now locked.

Yay! Let us know how it goes.

Thrilling Wednesday report, see man: Vivid nightmares overnight, disrupted zzz man. Breakfasted/skoolbused Mini-B., bleary we man. Subsequently attempted siesta failed, no zzz we man. Lunch was 2 ham-&-cheese sandwiches, ingest we man. Went to see Mama T-B., visit we man senior she man man. No yelling occurred, surprising man. Back at the casa, attempted siesta #2 failed, no zzz we man. Ex-Mrs.-T-B. wanted to swap No Two Guys eve from today to Thursday, OK with us man. It was propitious, because one of Mama T-B.'s cousins died and funeral is Thursday, free-to-attend we man. Caucus occurred with windows/siding contractor, very comfortable feeling but must wait on quote we man. Din-din was shepherd's pie from Aldi, ingest Two Guys man. Movie night was one Better Call Saul episode, watch Two Guys man. Many (2+1) bowls of Costco popcorn were consumed, ingest Two Guys man. This tallies to Many (2x2x2x2 -1) for the week so far, impressive man. We noted to Mini-B. that we could challenge the all-time popcorn record, note we man to wee man man. Mini-B. said, "Si man, but do we WANT to, huh man, si man," si man. No party with the rubias tonight, no cavort we man. Funeral Thursday afternoon, long drive but should be Texas weather Many man. Must itinerary GSs/ESs, itinerary we man man. And that was/is our thrilling Wednesday, report we man.

At least he's not an inferior primate like some people we know here, no and see man.

What mam521 said, in spades. In addition: 1. Search deeply within yourself, and both ask and answer this question: What flaws and shortcomings in or surrounding my spouse-to-be can I overlook completely... and never bring up or let rise again? 2. Repeat aloud to yourself, multiple times, while looking into your own eyes in the mirror: "Marry in haste, repent in leisure... marry in haste, repent in leisure..." and grasp what your reflection is telling you.

Wonderful!

Wonderful!

I want to thank everyone for keeping the discussion on such a cerebral plane. Had this thread sunk into the mud with blatant political partisanship, we'd have had to move it to the Current Events forum. People here are quietly expressing reservations and keeping those secondary to thoughtful policy discussions.

Wednesday! Time for our Semiofficial Semiweekly VAWA-Thread Joke: =========================================== THE BLONDE AND THE RADIO ANNOUNCEMENT On a freezing-cold winter morning, a blonde and her husband were having breakfast when the radio announcer said, "We're expecting 8 to 10 inches of snow today. Please move your car to the even-numbered side of the street so the snowplow can get through." Being the helpful wife that she was, the blonde bundled up and moved her car. The next week, the radio announcer said, "Ten to 12 inches of snow today. Please move your car to the odd-numbered side." Again the blonde went out, moving her car compliantly. The next week, the radio announcer said, "We're expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow and you must park…" And POOF - the power went out. The blonde looked panicked and said, "Oh, no! I don't know which side to move the car to now!" With the calm patience that only a man married to a blonde could master, her husband lovingly said, "Sweetheart… why don't you just leave the car in the garage this time?"

This dude (former Federal prosecutor) absolutely barbecues the snooty, pearl-clutching Peggy Noonan. "It slices, it dices..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Peggy Noonan and the Dangers of Uncritical Thinking Elvis Presley, as most would agree, sang beautiful songs. But he was wise enough not to attempt composing any of them. Peggy Noonan has written beautiful words and phrases, but she should have the wisdom to collaborate with a sound thinker whose thoughts, not hers, might be expressed through her belles-lettres. In her attempts to appear thoughtful, writing rhythmically from an Olympian perch, she dispenses vapidity disguised as wisdom. Her recent column, "A Republic, But Can We Keep It?" unwittingly shows the danger of a lack of critical thinking to our republic, not, as she claims to demonstrate, the dangers to the country of President Trump's unconventional, decidedly not pretty, style. This article purports to tell us all the ways that President Trump has violated our republic's sacred norms and thus endangers the republic. There is no doubt but that the president is often vulgar, profane, and insulting, offending those who value dignity in our country's officials. These are fair criticisms. But there is arguably a kernel of common sense in many, perhaps most, of his substantive projects that is lost on citizens who judge primarily on appearance. As John Stuart Mill so eloquently wrote in 1835, our republic was founded on liberty, which in turn is achieved by principled argument and discussion. Thus, what our republic urgently needs today are thinkers who can separate wheat from chaff and argue about this frantic presidency on substance, not style. We have plenty of TDS victims and Rachel Maddow commentators in the vast legacy media, and do not need any more reflexive bombast. The problem with Ms. Noonan joining this vapid, uncritical crowd is that she claims the conservative mantle of Reagan and Bush Sr. Peggy Noonan is a conservative and a Republican, so her criticisms of Trump must be valid. So, to the extent she cites conclusions that are supposedly beyond principled argument, she thereby uses her status to stifle the very debate that is so crucial to our democratic republic. [...] https://spectator.org/peggy-noonan-and-the-dangers-of-uncritical-thinking/

There's your answer, then. Good luck to you.

Related threads have been merged.

Thrilling Tuesday report, see man: We zzz'd rather well overnight, wondering when the other shoe will drop on this man. Breakfasted/skoolbused Mini-B., bye wee man man. Stayed up pending doc caucus with Uncle T-B., rather groggy we man man. Uncle T-B. beetched/moaned the whole short trip there, good grief man. In waiting room, kept rambling about nonsense stuff and expecting us to answer, man. Doc out-cleaned our ears, some improvement man. Doc out-cleaned Uncle T-B.'s ears, latter then complained that things were too loud man. Returned Uncle T-B. to his casa, return we man. Had to go in to out-straighten pill caddy hosed by casa-health nooser, man. Lunch was the Costco hotdog + Coke Zero, ingest F$WM. We opportuned* to buy two more on-sale lasagnas, F$WM. *cool new verb concising the cumbersome "took the opportunity to," brilliant we man Returned to casa, si man. Arranged for caucus with far-off windows/siding contractor, Wednesday eve man. An effective siesta was at last taken, zzz we man. Din-din was nuked Barrilla pasta + Aldi meatballs + Aldi meat sauce, ingest Two Guys man. It was somehow even better than in memory, culinarily proficient we man. Movie night was a Better Call Saul episode, watch Two Guys man. Many (2+1) bowls of Costco popcorn were consumed, ingest Two Guys man. This tallies to an even Manyzen already for the week, quota achieved & smashed man. No party with the rubias tonight, no cavort we man. Must visit Mama T-B. on Wednesday, needy senior she man man. Caucus with contractor before sunset, caucus we man with he man man. Non-Two-Guys eve Wednesday, sigh man. And that was/is our thrilling Tuesday, report we man.

Now tell us how you REALLY feel, si mam ma'am. In our experience, the VERY worst batteries are Northern Tool + Equipment, si man. They spontaneously leak & corrode even when kept cool/dry/dark, sigh man. Why must the expensive Energizers be the only truly good battery, huh man?

Keep us apprised.

Wonderful!

Wonderful!

Wonderful!

Among the most important.

Thank you for your helpful report, and congratulations again!

If this happens, use the GC to light a cigar as a parlor trick.

What a moonbeam. I'd've been livid, too. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Two Weeks Before Wedding, Bride Uninvited Half of Her Guests. When She Explained Her Reasoning, People Were Livid A bride decided to cut back on her wedding guest list just two weeks before her big day, leaving people furious over the last-minute changes. According to a post on the Reddit Wedding Shaming forum, a woman detailed the fiasco surrounding her cousin's wedding. "I'm still processing this. Wedding was supposed to be this Saturday in Asheville," the post started. "My cousin has always been into spiritual stuff. Crystals, tarot, astrology, whatever. Fine. Not my thing, but you do you. But about six months ago she started seeing this "spiritual advisor" who she treats like a therapist/life coach/oracle all rolled into one." [...] https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/articles/two-weeks-wedding-bride-uninvited-094800703.html

If he were Amish, he'd have been released with an apology. --- Wanna merge this with the big UK thread?

That was a spectacular (in the sense of "really a spectacle") fireball with smoke. Awful. Tom Llamas (NBC Nightly News anchorman) can't pronounce "Louisville" properly.