strait2gateway

Because the husband is in the military he deserves more leeway? No sale. Take half of what's been told as the actual truth and the husband is not acting like a decent person.

I really love how everyone here has tried and convicted this guy with only hearing one side, and to be quite frank, her story sounds ridiculous and unbelievable. This guy is putting his life on the line for your freedom such as being able to post on boards etc etc etc , he at least deserves his say. He doesn't deserve to be labeled a woman abuser until all the facts come out. Horrible !!!!

Again, more red flags for trafficking. Are you taking this situation with the seriousness that it merits?
You stated you haven't informed immigration. Informed them of what? Your subject is "is this a shame?" I assume you mean "sham", but yes, it is a dang shame. Shameful that a lot of people on an Internet board can see major red flags, and you are making it about you. Did she somehow trick you. I hope you make it about her and will go over there and make sure she is ok. What's preventing you from driving an hour and demanding you speak with your wife, alone, to make sure she is safe?
Check out this national human trafficking website. I saw you're in PA, so here are stats for your state. But the hotline is toll free, national, and I suggest you call:
https://traffickingresourcecenter.org/state/pennsylvania

Dude here's why you either need to get her stuff to her and close this out or get her out of there. From how it looks you're one nail salon/massage parlor raid frim getting on a list that you'll never get off of. You brought an immigrant over here that by all looks is in a situation of indentured servitude to pay off an overseas debt. You havent reported her missing, havent tried to find her, and it's not going to take a Clarence Darrow of a DA to make a case that you look complicit on the whole thing. Trafficking is a big deal now, and a situation like this could be viewed as an opportunity to make an example out of somebody.
That's your wife, and ok so you dont care enough to look for or protect her or whatever thats fine. Your name is going to be the first name that shows up if she gets fingerprinted and they are going to come looking for you and frankly speaking I think your story smells badly in addition to your inaction does not really look like what someone in a valid marriage would do. You are aware if it and that makes you just as guilty as if you had put her to work yourself. You need to man up and take care of this dude.

I'd still chase her down and drag her out. What is being forced upon her is not legal in the USA. That sounds kind of bad to write it like that, but likely her preconceptions of what these people can hold over her head, does not match with the laws of the USA.

What?? Why would she hide from you?
First and most importantly, you need to be 1000% that your wife is safe. You need to be sure she is not being coerced (ex. writing the letter claiming it is her decision, messaging you daily). You need to be 10,000% sure.
If you are absolutely sure that it was HER DECISION to leave your home to work elsewhere without your knowledge of her whereabouts, then you have your answer. She abandoned your marriage. And you need to strongly communicate how this is jeopardizing her marriage and possibly her immigration status.
If you feel it was not her decision, then you should have some type of authoritative figure to have a talk with her. Lawyer, PI, social worker, a friend that is an officer? Somebody!!!
Because believe me. If this was my wife and she was manipulated into doing something like that. I would raise so much hell at that nail shop the owners would be thankful the police was called.

This thread scares me a little. I wonder if she's in a human trafficking situation where she's being obligated to work to pay back her parent's debt. Does she also live with the nail salon owners? Do they control her every move? All red flags of human trafficking.
It doesn't sound like she's blowing you off if she left her engagement ring, expensive jewelry, and most clothes. She could have done so because she is afraid to have "flashy" things at this nail salon. They could steal it from her or make her pawn it.
I hope you do something to make sure she is ok. I would NOT be ok with this situation and get police involved. It doesn't sound like she is exercising her free will in this situation.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/phillip-martin/nail-salons-and-human-tra_b_669076.html
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/10/nyregion/at-nail-salons-in-nyc-manicurists-are-underpaid-and-unprotected.html
https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/my-nail-salon-may-be-a-front-for-a-brothel/2015/11/20/65cc15e6-84c0-11e5-8ba6-cec48b74b2a7_story.html

Debt bondage is illegal in this country. I would look into the exact laws and throw it at these people who borrowed money to her parents and are forcing her to work to pay it off. Not so much that you will do something this time, but to let them know borrowing money to her parents will bring no obligation on your wife in the future.
Federal law defines “severe forms of trafficking in persons” as 1) sex trafficking in which a commercial sex act is induced by force, fraud, or coercion or in which the person induced to perform such an act is under 18; or 2) the recruitment, harboring, transportation, provision, or obtaining of a person for labor or services, through the use of force, fraud, or coercion, for the purpose of subjecting that person to involuntary servitude, forced labor, peonage, debt bondage, or slavery.1

People act completely different online than in real life. It's your choice, your life but like T-Bone said: "If any one of her troubling-to-you behaviors or attitudes continues, can you accept it for a lifetime without ever saying one word about it or without resenting it ever again? (Think money, lack of intimacy, lack of scheduling, etc.)"

This; in my opinion, is very dangerous advice. It's like telling someone going to the Arctic Circle to forget the cold thing.
OP- Yes the age difference will be an issue at the consulate. You should be prepared to deal with it, start preparing now. Your faith in god will not sway the consular decision one bit.

Yes, write a letter to where you sent the AOS forms, include her A number etc. Also make an INFOPASS and take it there. I would also contact ICE (details at the bottom of the page) to tell them that your wife has left the marital home and has started making false claims of abuse and that you're worried she's going to try a false VAWA claim. I would ask the officers for the police report, especially if the report is favourable to you. DO NOT be alone with her. Sounds like she's already being coached. Yes you can file divorce after withdrawing the I-864, or before... has no impact on the process. I would withdraw the I-864 asap, I would also file for divorce including an OP. You need to protect yourself. Anyone who starts the false claims of abuse stuff cannot be trusted. Be wary before you consider taking her back. once she realises that you're withdrawing support she may try and claw her way back in.

Men are simple creatures. When they tell you you are dwelling too much on one topic -- especially one that is essentially red tape and frustration -- they mean it. Subtext isn't a game most guys dabble in. He's telling you: "I know this is necessary, but I think it's boring. But do we really need to talk about this to the exclusion of everything else, unless there's some form we need to complete?" On the other hand, not replying to texts and emails is a childish tactic, unless the number of these messages is overwhelming. Don't bombard him with messages. He'll get that his lack of communication is an issue fast enough if you stop.
The whole process is an utter drag. If you have no reason to worry over whether you're going to get your visa (i.e., red flags, not enough money, etc.) beyond how long it takes, why inject drama into it? Take time to talk about, well, everything else! What you're doing with your days, what movies you've seen recently, who's being a jerk at work -- you know, the kind of stuff you'd talk about if you were living together already.
Also, are you seriously worried that your husband doesn't press the like button on everything you post on his FB profile? My dude and I have been together for four and a half years in a rock solid relationship and he still doesn't "like" everything I post on his wall, nor I on his. I must be an ancient crone because I don't get why this is an issue.

Sorry to here about the 180. Some people get so overwhelmed that they shut down, where other times it is a red flag to what is to come.
Since you said off and on it might be a good idea to dig deep and see what issues you had before and see if they play a part in him pulling away.
Can you drop the visa topic for a bit and see if he responds better?

It looks like the IO suspected that you entered into a marriage only with the purpose of gaining an immigration benefit. Given that your wife is 20 years older, the IO questioned whether yours was a marriage of convenience as opposed to a bona fide marriage. Hence the questions about you having sex, why you married, and how you met.
If you have a true real marriage you should have nothing to fear. It make take time, but it will be possible to prove so to the IO. You can submit "a request to reconsider" to the consulate, attaching all additional proof of your relationship and sworn affidavits from friends and family, from your priest, as well as from your wife and you. Just be persistent, and you will get your visa. Don't worry, and don't be afraid.
(But if your marriage is indeed a matter of convenience and you married for a visa, than it's better not to continue, because the consulates are highly trained in spotting fakes vs. real ones. It's bad enough to get a visa refusal, it's much worse to get a permanent ban for immigration fraud.)

Most threads suggest the decision is made before interview, based on documentation submitted.
OP stated someone from the embassy called his Indian employer the day before interview. Wondering if that influenced CO's decision.
Good luck Ninja, keep fightin'.

Tomorrow they have open house for us citizen as well as we have appointments in morning.
All our family and friends are writing email and we have asked our congressman to contact embassy for us and request second interview
Whatever the consular thinks we don't care coz we love each other madly and visa was an option to live together.
They can't break us down.

Phone bills of both of us upto date. Showing at least an hr a day on phone and twice a day.
Skype call log uptodate
Acknowledgement of our marriage certificate from Boulder county
Affidavits from brother in law and friends in us.
Join title of condo
Beneficiary listed on retirement fund
Join bank account in Nepal
Copy of my wife's passport and visa to India and Nepal
Wedding.announcement from.news paper
Copies of tickets / trips
Photos -30/total photos
For nvc
We updated them with our phone bills, emails, joint bank account in america, info about our anniversary trip, listed as beneficiary for second retirement fund, copy of postal receipts of gifts and cards sent from benificary to petitioner and family
Then we brought updated bank statement, Skype , updated emails , more.photos from our trip but the co was not interested to look into it.
Well today they say lack evidence.. DOES THAT MEANS THEY WANT SEX TAPE coz that's all we can think more for evidence
Chasing embassy yet .. Not going down.. They can deny but can't rip our relationship apart.

Was all this evidence what was in the initial I-130 package at USCIS? What did you submit from the beginning.
And your CO sounds like the dreaded "Dragon Lady" that use to rule over Lagos and deny everyone and anyone until she was reassigned to India about 3 years ago. Oh my. Man I remember those horrid threads. So sorry.

Fight this like a Ninja wishing you a successful outcome.

No, absolutely do not send two packages. This will confuse everything. Either one package will be rejected or OP will have two cases pending at the same time. What terrible advice.

.. and yet other white females your age with younger men get approved every single day. Instead of complaining about race, age, and gender you should see why others like you have made it and you did not.
I don't disagree with everything you are saying but spewing out constant streams of sexist/racist remarks (ie: "Lilly white male American self righteous.. ") and wallowing in victim-hood is not going to get you what you want. Your spouse was not denied because you are an older woman though I would hazard to guess that if you shared your attitude towards all things white that have a ####### with the CO it could have had a possible prejudicial effect.

I read that 3 times and I still have no clue as to what you are saying.

Okay everyone, let me put some things to rest. As you know, I am Medical Practitioner, Midwife and in between patients, babies, and births I am currently working on my PhD in Public Health. So I guess that makes me "Future Doctor Lopez" I just realized that... awww I love the sound of that!
Okay, I don't know law as you can tell by some of my questions that I have posted, but I do medicine, health and babies . I do agree with everyone else: 1. Be honest 2. Herpes, is NOT a communicable disease that should cause denial. 3. I am almost positive that she will NOT be denied based upon her status. 4. www.cdc.gov is a great start on education and awareness for everything! I do want to give you a little info regarding Herpes. So please read carefully for the one's who posted previous questions.
I am not sure what specific test the medical exam requires, as I am still new to Visa Journey but at the time of her examination if she is not visibly showing an outbreak then the ONLY other POSSIBLE way to detect HSV 2 is through a SPECIFIC blood test (PCR) & a
lthough sores may be visible to the eye, several laboratory tests may be necessary to determine whether the sores are caused by HSV or another infection. The most reliable method of diagnosing genital herpes is by viral culture during which a new lesion is swabbed or scraped with the sample added to a laboratory culture that contains healthy cells. These cells are then examined, a day or two later, under a microscope that shows changes to the cells that indicate the growth of the herpes virus. A blood test only detects if a person has HSV antibodies in their blood. It doesn't tell if its HSV 1 (cold sores = HERPES) or HSV 2 (genital). What specific blood test will be ordered for her exam is unknown to me.




Living with Herpes is not the end of world. 2 out 3 people have some form of this ugly virus whether it be HSV 1 or HSV 2 and half the world who has this ugly virus can have it and NEVER know they have. It's called Asymptomatic. Meaning a person is a carrier of a virus / disease and can transfer their virus to another person without being aware they are positive and transferring it. Herpes, lies dormant (under the radar) at the bottom of your nerve ending which is why STRESS is the # 1 reason for flare ups. Along with direct sunlight, extreme cold, and certain foods like cheese, chocolate, sugary snacks, caffeine, nuts, oatmeal, etc... this virus is an immune systems enemy. It important to keep your immune system strong and healthy and watch your diet.




So, no need to panic about the STD question. Just say yes, to the question and make sure she is taking a daily regiment of medicine / herbs or homeopathics to lessen or keep her outbreaks at bay if she is prone to having outbreaks often.




Like I always say, you don't have to remember the truth.





Hope this helps.

Mark "yes." She knows it, and lying to an immigration officer will cause a whole lot more pain than herpes.

My husband was denied a B2 visa twice in a couple month period of time before we applied for the K1 visa and it had no impact on our approval. I was there with my husband for his interview and after it was over and we were approved we were casually chatting with the CO and we asked him about the denied tourist visas (particularly what we could have done differently because we thought he had strong ties) and the CO didn't even know about the 2 denials. He then looked them up in the computer and said there was nothing we did wrong - that as along as he had a girlfriend in the US, it really didn't matter what ties he showed, he wasn't going to get the B2 visa and we did the right thing applying for the K1. The main point here is do everything you can to prove you have a legitimate relationship and it shouldn't be a problem,