N and J

Sorry, can't. Circumstances change.. and CBP officers are the doormen when the embassy interview is a distant memory.
Say a young student applicant puts down "sightseeing for two weeks" on the ds160.. then gets a 10-yr visa. Two years later.. when no longer a student, and say unemployed.. he\she may have other intentions for entering on their B2. That's where I want the CBP doing their job!

Being honest with US immigration is a mistake? Is lying a better option?
The system doesn't work the way you want it to. A visitor visa allows a person to know at the door, it does not and has never guarantee entry. It's call a double check. Some people who get visitor visas show up at the door with all their possessions ready to immigrate.
If you invited someone to visit and they show up with a moving van, would you let that person in?

She needs at least her AP before traveling (60 to 120 days after filing to AOS). But if she's going to spend over 6 months out of the year out of the country, there's a good chance the green card will get yanked. You have to maintain residency in the USA. In other words she's still going to need a full time place to live in the USA. Both of you may have to travel back on short notice for a green card interview if called.

So she came here on the wrong visa. Should have been a student visa. Sure some classes doesn't require it but depending on what she said to CBP he/she might have felt she needed a student visa. And you lied to CBP by saying she's your fiance when in fact she's only your girlfriend. CBP were not being #######, you guys were not being smart about all this. So many people call CBP bad names when in fact they're just doing their jobs of making sure people don't come here on the wrong visas.

This may sound harsh, but they did the right thing. Extended visa, Girlfriend of a USC, from a 3rd world country. She's a huge risk to stay and adjust. What was written on her passport? Was it an expedited removal or did they allow her to withdraw her application for entry?
Remember IO's are allowed to lie. They could've just expected them to get married and used this as a dodge

You're welcome.

I-134 is used for the K-1 visa. The I-864 comes later, after you are married and filing for AOS.

I am sorry let me correct myself. For a Federal Direct Plus Loan from the government you need credit. They do a credit check for that. Not for the regular Subsidized and Un-Subsidized loans. =)

I am going to take a shot in the dark if it passes USCIS without pictures the CO is almost without a doubt going to ask why there are no pictures.

She cannot marry someone here and adjust her status. OPs name is on the passport as a petitioner and it says a K1 visa. My ex is here illegally and I was told flat out from immigration he could get married but he will never be able to get his papers and if he leaves he will have a 10 year ban because he has been here 2 years illegally.

Not sure what happened..but here it goes again:
Most lenders are going to ask if you are a citizen, permanent resident or non-resident. Technically you are not yet permanent and when documentation is asked, it will be clear your GC is conditional. The reason they ask is because they want to get their money back and for that to happen, they need to be able to get with someone that is around. Now, many lenders would give you a loan if you have a co-borrower that is a citizen or permanent resident.
Couple of things to take in consideration:
student loans cannot be discharged in a bankruptcy
think about saving some money before starting or study and work. There is nothing better than graduating with no loan to repay...it gives you a lot of options

Don't listen to me? Did you file a K1 and have someone stay here illegally???? I am just wondering because I have. He asked about if it would cause problems later if he tried to file for someone else and if she does not get on the plane to leave YES IT CAN CAUSE PROBLEMS FOR HIM. Oh wait I know that because I am in the process of trying to file a K1. In addition, I NEVER SAID IT WAS HIS RESPONSIBILITY. BUT IT CAUSES LESS OF A HEADACHE DOWN THE ROAD. SO DO NOT MAKE ME SOUND LIKE I DON'T KNOW WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT!!! DON'T PUT WORDS IN MY MOUTH AND DON'T MAKE COMMENTS THAT YOU HAVE NO EXPERIENCE IN. I do, I had someone take off illegally and I never said he was ICE. Oh and just so you know since you think you know EVERYTHING according to the Immigration officer in Newark when I went for my Infopass appt. when he was finally out of status. A person is not legally financially responsible but depending on how one reports the situation with a person who overstays on a visa....You can be held responsible if something goes wrong. IF he takes the right steps and sends a letter saying he is canceling his K1 visa application, it goes in the file and released him from any problems down the road. So DO NOT TELL SOMEONE NOT TO LISTEN TO ME I have been here. Would you like me to send you the 200+ pages of documents I have proving he committed fraud so it didn't come back that I helped him??
We shouldn't listen to people who don't have the experience and think they are immigration lawyers. (eye roll)

Lawyers do not speed up the process. Many VJ members who have used them or a visa service still get RFE's. Nobody knows your case like you do.

If you don't like filling out forms and reading instructions, then get a lawyer. It won't be quicker. Everybody gets in the same line. Some think it is slightly longer because of sending things back and forth to the lawyer and waiting on him to move on it. Maybe less stressful if you can just get off Visa Journey, sit back and let it happen and not expect him to move as fast as you would pushing on to the next step.

She cannot marry someone here and adjust her status. OPs name is on the passport as a petitioner and it says a K1 visa. My ex is here illegally and I was told flat out from immigration he could get married but he will never be able to get his papers and if he leaves he will have a 10 year ban because he has been here 2 years illegally.

A K1 can only adjust through the original petitioner. They cannot marry someone else and do a concurrent filing to get a GC.

i think the country she is from does matter as some as more fraululent than others

it can not appear that he is helping get visas

and i would drive her to airport

who is to say she will actually leave the US as someone else on here said his GF got visa and flew in (not to him)

who is to say this woman will actually leave the US



i heard of a woman getting a K1 visa (on on VJ) that came with 3 bf's in the US telling 2 of them she was coming on tourist visa

she didn't like the one she came for and went to one of the others and married / he applled for AOS and she slipped through the system and was approved

/ no one questioned why she did not marry the man she came for

he was unable to stop the process

Thank God you don't see that therapist anymore. We are not supposed to take sides. We are not even the ones that are supposed to solve your problems. We work to get people to work on their problems on their own and find out what works for them. Everyone is different. I would never tell a client anything along the lines of you may be the problem. We address the mental health issue not the person. In other words a therapist is there to guide you into making better choices and help you learn positive ways to make your life manageable.

All I can say is good luck. If you want to stick around for that kind of stress than you are one person who likes chaos. Sometimes love can't fix everything and no matter how much you love someone your own emotional well-being is more important. As long as you know by staying you are taking a great risk with immigration if she decided to cause problems for you. You can't complain or cry later that you didn't know because you have been warned especially by 2 people who went through this in marriages and one woman who works her tail off to keep control over her BPD. Either way if you stay or go best of luck to you. Me personally to be honest I would rather go back to my country and live dirt poor than stay in a marriage where I never know what is coming next. If you like it here stay she has no control over your life whether you are married or divorced. You are a grown man and can make your own decisions in life.

Don't think he was asking for sympathy...I think he was looking for advice. I would be worried too if I didn't know the rules and regulations in a country and someone started telling me I was going to pay alimony. I am going to go out on a limb here and say he probably does not have a job that he could even afford to put a roof over his own head let alone pay for another to survive. When do you want him to start documenting things? Do you document things in your relationship now fights, problems, and what not JUST IN CASE? No normally people start documenting when things go wrong. Some people would rather not sit in an unhappy and unhealthy relationship and would rather divorce. Not sure why he even still talks to her but...

Do you know every medication someone takes? Do you go through people's prescription bottles? If so do you know what every medication out there is for? He lives in another country these medications for mental illness many times have never made it to other countries...Maybe she lied about what they were... If she was on her medication maybe he would not have known...Maybe now she is off her medication. Some people are embarrassed by their mental illness and will never tell anyone and sometimes people will never know who had a mental illness. You would never be able to tell if someone was bipolar while they are taking medication. Don't assume. I see clients every day and you would never be able to tell there was an issue until they told you. Because they take the medication like they are supposed to. Mental illness is not just picking up on cues of sadness or hearing sadness in someone's voice. As trained professionals we miss cues sometimes so I doubt someone who knows nothing about mental illness would be able to tell what was going on even more so coming from another country where I highly doubt mental illness is as well known as here. Also, no one knows what she is....it was speculation she was bipolar and most of the time these are not symptoms of bipolar 1 or bipolar 2.

You are not in a normal situation. It is not as if god forbid something happens....when you go to court it is not just going to be okay don't talk to her and go your own way...your immigration status is at risk and not only that it puts your future in jeopardy. Right now you have no protection. You have no proof and no one who has witnessed this first hand to even come forward on your behalf if something happens. It is not your fault she has no money. You don't have to get divorced right away but I would separate for right now until she gets help. It is not possible that you have 2 people who were in marriages like this and they didn't work and you are going to be the exception. Transborderwife is a rare story because she WANTS help so she WORKS hard daily. This isn't even a week old your problem and she is already coming up with excuses. I know they say in sickness and in health and stay with your husband or wife no matter what but you have to protect yourself. So maybe staying someplace else until she shows you she really wants to work this out is an option.

So you'll spend your life being bounced around and threatened by her manipulation? Never once knowing which person is going to be next to you any minute of the day? One minute she might be as nice and friendly as can be and the next minute they're threatening you, injuring themselves and calling to cops to say you abused her? Is it a sad situation, sure it is. But unless she's going to help herself there is nothing you can do about it. And unfortunately they often will not seek help until they have zero other choice and have hit rock bottom. She's maneuvered herself so you will feel trapped with no choice. Many people with her disorder are very well able to take care of themselves and hold a job. Yes she might have to change jobs periodically, as eventually work mates and bosses discover they are batcarp crazy, but they do survive. You forget, I was married to someone like this once. I've seen all the games, the tricks and the traps they can set. When they know you're heading out the door, they can suddenly become extremely pleasant people. But as soon as they know they have you back in, the mental abuse will start building up again.

I have 15 years of marriage experience living with this plus 2 1/2 years of the aftermath. What is said above is all true. My ex wife is on disability but she survived just fine and whenever there was something that was going to benefit her she miraculously found the "strength" to do it. Surprise, surprise. Please don't fall for the manipulation. You can feel sorry for her but I can guarantee you she will be fine and probably look for another victim as soon as possible once you are out the door. You are trying to avoid the decision. I don't blame you. I came up with all kinds of excuses myself. The deciding factor was to save my daughter but I was not far behind in thinking I needed to save myself. Enough was enough. I cut the cord and never looked back. You have "White Knight Syndrome" but you can't save her or change her. She has to do it herself.

Yes, all very familiar. It's ancient history now. I walked out of the house 2 1/2 years ago and took our daughter with me on advice of our marriage counselor and 3 counselors that were working with our daughter. Child Protective Services was about to get involved. 3/4 counselors said "Borderline" after many many observations and interactions with my ex and the 4th said. "Highly emotionally abusive." I ended up going to personal counseling and a support group to get through the situation at that time, the divorce process and the aftermath. To this day, she will not admit any fault on her part and she is not an abusive person. No one dares tell her that she is BPD on fear of repercussions. I learned a lot about that experience, life goes on and happier days are ahead. However, my daughter still has lingering problems from that experience that may never go away. I can't tell you how many times I was watching my Fiancee for signs of BPD or similar problems. I never ever want to experience that again.