Vicomi

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.
Henry David Thoreau

Visa journey kept me company during those long days waiting for visa approval. I arrived in States from London, UK on June, 3rd 2013. We got married on the June 22nd. (No time to waste). The third anniversary for marriage and life in the US is around the corner. It took me long time to adjust to life here, even though my transition seemed seamless to outsiders and hubby. For more than 2 years I missed London immensely and sometimes regretted making the move to the States. But husband's love kept me staying another day and another day and another day....
So I received my EAD in October 2013 and started job hunting immediately. First job at Macy's - as a seasonal worker for 6 weeks! Second at Dept. of Juvenile Justice for 3 months and current job at a top public university where I have been a little over 2 years. I love, love, love my job but still feel challenged in some areas. Coming from working with poorly educated dysfunctional families to highly intelligent kids took something getting used to.
Finally in March 2016, we had our "white wedding" with all the bells and whistles in my home country (SA). 30 hours of travel and four airports later, I can truly say I have now experienced jetlag!!! In my former life, Cape Town was a mere 12 hour flight from London!
There has been a lot of adjustments and mind shifts that I needed to make to feel more settled in the US. I still miss friends, the ease of travel, diversity, culture, castles, parks and life in the UK. But closer to year 3, I think I have finally accepted and feel at peace that the Unites States will be my forever home.
The adjustment to life in the US can be a heck of thing but with the love and support of a loving & patient spouse, all will be well. To all those coming over soon, wish you all the best in your new home country. Some days may not be great but keep the faith. May your life here be filled with peace, joy and happiness!!!!

Visa journey kept me company during those long days waiting for visa approval. I arrived in States from London, UK on June, 3rd 2013. We got married on the June 22nd. (No time to waste). The third anniversary for marriage and life in the US is around the corner. It took me long time to adjust to life here, even though my transition seemed seamless to outsiders and hubby. For more than 2 years I missed London immensely and sometimes regretted making the move to the States. But husband's love kept me staying another day and another day and another day....
So I received my EAD in October 2013 and started job hunting immediately. First job at Macy's - as a seasonal worker for 6 weeks! Second at Dept. of Juvenile Justice for 3 months and current job at a top public university where I have been a little over 2 years. I love, love, love my job but still feel challenged in some areas. Coming from working with poorly educated dysfunctional families to highly intelligent kids took something getting used to.
Finally in March 2016, we had our "white wedding" with all the bells and whistles in my home country (SA). 30 hours of travel and four airports later, I can truly say I have now experienced jetlag!!! In my former life, Cape Town was a mere 12 hour flight from London!
There has been a lot of adjustments and mind shifts that I needed to make to feel more settled in the US. I still miss friends, the ease of travel, diversity, culture, castles, parks and life in the UK. But closer to year 3, I think I have finally accepted and feel at peace that the Unites States will be my forever home.
The adjustment to life in the US can be a heck of thing but with the love and support of a loving & patient spouse, all will be well. To all those coming over soon, wish you all the best in your new home country. Some days may not be great but keep the faith. May your life here be filled with peace, joy and happiness!!!!

Visa journey kept me company during those long days waiting for visa approval. I arrived in States from London, UK on June, 3rd 2013. We got married on the June 22nd. (No time to waste). The third anniversary for marriage and life in the US is around the corner. It took me long time to adjust to life here, even though my transition seemed seamless to outsiders and hubby. For more than 2 years I missed London immensely and sometimes regretted making the move to the States. But husband's love kept me staying another day and another day and another day....
So I received my EAD in October 2013 and started job hunting immediately. First job at Macy's - as a seasonal worker for 6 weeks! Second at Dept. of Juvenile Justice for 3 months and current job at a top public university where I have been a little over 2 years. I love, love, love my job but still feel challenged in some areas. Coming from working with poorly educated dysfunctional families to highly intelligent kids took something getting used to.
Finally in March 2016, we had our "white wedding" with all the bells and whistles in my home country (SA). 30 hours of travel and four airports later, I can truly say I have now experienced jetlag!!! In my former life, Cape Town was a mere 12 hour flight from London!
There has been a lot of adjustments and mind shifts that I needed to make to feel more settled in the US. I still miss friends, the ease of travel, diversity, culture, castles, parks and life in the UK. But closer to year 3, I think I have finally accepted and feel at peace that the Unites States will be my forever home.
The adjustment to life in the US can be a heck of thing but with the love and support of a loving & patient spouse, all will be well. To all those coming over soon, wish you all the best in your new home country. Some days may not be great but keep the faith. May your life here be filled with peace, joy and happiness!!!!

Visa journey kept me company during those long days waiting for visa approval. I arrived in States from London, UK on June, 3rd 2013. We got married on the June 22nd. (No time to waste). The third anniversary for marriage and life in the US is around the corner. It took me long time to adjust to life here, even though my transition seemed seamless to outsiders and hubby. For more than 2 years I missed London immensely and sometimes regretted making the move to the States. But husband's love kept me staying another day and another day and another day....
So I received my EAD in October 2013 and started job hunting immediately. First job at Macy's - as a seasonal worker for 6 weeks! Second at Dept. of Juvenile Justice for 3 months and current job at a top public university where I have been a little over 2 years. I love, love, love my job but still feel challenged in some areas. Coming from working with poorly educated dysfunctional families to highly intelligent kids took something getting used to.
Finally in March 2016, we had our "white wedding" with all the bells and whistles in my home country (SA). 30 hours of travel and four airports later, I can truly say I have now experienced jetlag!!! In my former life, Cape Town was a mere 12 hour flight from London!
There has been a lot of adjustments and mind shifts that I needed to make to feel more settled in the US. I still miss friends, the ease of travel, diversity, culture, castles, parks and life in the UK. But closer to year 3, I think I have finally accepted and feel at peace that the Unites States will be my forever home.
The adjustment to life in the US can be a heck of thing but with the love and support of a loving & patient spouse, all will be well. To all those coming over soon, wish you all the best in your new home country. Some days may not be great but keep the faith. May your life here be filled with peace, joy and happiness!!!!

Interview: Success.
POE: Boston. Success.
Location: Las Vegas area. Arrived at 8:20pm Pacific Time.
In the next few days, legally getting married and then applying for AOS.
Ugh, it's been a long and tiring effort.
BrockUK, man, that's so horrible to hear - that's worse than my ex-girlfriend who screwed me over. I hope your life gets better, man - put her out of your mind, seal her away, and find someone who deserves your effort and affection.

Those who sacrifice security for freedom, deserve neither
Benjamin Franklin

A definite maybe !!
you can stay as long as you are here legally, but must return for the interview at the embassy, but in NO CASE should you overstay since that can throw the entire process out the window. You can also come and go as often as you like, but you run the risk of being turned back at the border at any time, so be prepared for that. You need to be completely honest and tell the CBP folks that you have a K-1 in process, when it was filed, and that you are obviously not going to screw that up this far into the process. Have documentation from USCIS that you can show them.
Some people here have been back and forth many times, while others were denied on their first attempt, so it is really hard to predict, although I think most would agree that coming with a truck full of goods makes it more likely that you would be turned back.
If you live close to the border, why not go for it, but if you have to drive hours and hours with a truck full of goods, the risk/reward starts to look less attractive.
And Sam, what you say is not correct. She will not be automatically rejected.

Meant with some tongue in cheek but with a message to this poster....
First...there is no need to shout. I do not understand why you dont understand that when you use capital letter, it is shouting.
Second.. this is called visa journey.... The definition of journey is taking a path and discovering new things. So if folks type things that seem repetitive, it is only that they are discovering things on their journey. This isnt caled "visaIKnowEveryThing.com. I do not understand why you do not understand this
Third This journey we are all taking is a long, hard and emotional one and sometimes some people may need to vent things when they are upset or frustrated because we are all in love and miss our loved ones. So are you venting because you are frustrated If so , I can understand it but maybe you should vent about your own issues and not blast others for trying to learn and understand what to do on their own visa journey.
Meant with the kindest of intentions........

.......and by the way "TIM/MAV...it's really low classed to make such comments about the looks of anyones Fiance, and in this case Your multiple references to being so sarcastic. My looks, and My Fiances looks, and our relationship is none of your business.
The forums here are intended to provide access to sincere questions, and answers...not for offensive inuendos such as You have made.
Please refrain from any furthur comments about my question, or just go away.
To all others who this really applied to, I thank You all for your honesty in such a unsoken subject.

WELL..............how nice for You!!!
My post was really intended for someone who has considered the pre-nups..and to get their perspective.

I can tell some people still did not bother to read the information from the site linked above in this thread. Yes, they must be under the age of 31, and brought to the US by their parents through no fault of their own. It is not for minor children. It is for those that were brought here AS children to get a work permit. They also have to be in school or a graduate or veteran with no criminal background. A lot of the people eligible and applying for Deferred Action were brought to the US at a very young age, grew up here and have never known any other country as home.
They are not being 'let in' because they have already been here, growing up and living their lives here in the US. They are not being granted a green card, and they most certainly do pay the fees to file for their EAD. http://www.dhs.gov/deferred-action-childhood-arrivals#5
The waiting times at VSC and CSC fluctuate all the time and people were already waiting 5+ months for I-129F petition approvals before Deferred Action ever came into existance.
As for the USCIS lying: that is why the USCIS hotline is known as the misinformation hotline. They are not outright lying on purpose. The people that answer the phone at tier 1 level are not immigration workers and only know what is on their scripts and the screens they are able to see. They are hired to answer the phones. They hand out misinformation on a daily basis.

You should be blaming the parents who came here illegally with their children in tow. Children who grew up here, went to school here, and are here by no fault of their own. These children want the opportunity to remain in the only place they know as home. Our government has a conscience...I find no fault in that. Obviously you don't know the first thing about this legislation. You are being selfish because it may take your case a month or 2 longer to get through USCIS, oh boohoo. Your case and check being lost has zero to do with Deferred Action.

It's clear you don't know anything about the Deferred Action Program. Go learn something since you will be waiting, waiting, waiting (like all the rest of us) you have time on your hands: http://www.dhs.gov/deferred-action-childhood-arrivals .
FYI wait times are long from a combination of factors, not just this new program. It is mostly because USCIS has laid off half their employees and dramatically cut funding in the last 2 years. That you can thank Congress for.

Jist wondering, wat's your favourite celebration meal??

Congrats! I would have loved 4 months! Good luck with NVC!

Cant understand Y some ppl would badger those with a personal opinion here always negatively , but in life there are those ppl
one gotta just keep on stepping, one has to be unhappy to always offer up negatives and judgements even if they do have a pouint.
OP do what is requested from your mom and chalk it up as experience.

Yow bro, theres a saying never eat rice when its hot, You are not going to make a good decision if its rush,
as a marrieed man myself I cant even begin to imagine going thru that, I myself have never stepped out on the wife and lord
knows many temptations have came my way but I just cant be that kind of chink, and I dont expect that from her either, now u
say you love your wife...it may be hard but consider counseling, I know many here will tell you walk away while they have
cheated too due to seperations, this longing and nurturing causes some to falter which is no excuse. Dude dont punish yourself
with details... if you love her try starting to 4give, life is short and if a person wants forgiveness you can try to, god
forgives us everyday and we still keep doing wrongs, this she did with a married man, so maybe she was not looking a relationship
just stupid comfort, hang in there , you both speak to an expert, do not get bitter..............this too will passed ..peace out ma man.

I am so sorry to hear this, I can only imagine how much your heart hurts right now. There are a lot of stories of marriages that have survived infidelity, and they have a few things in common; the one who cheated accepts responsibility for their actions, the one who cheated accepts that their partner is going to be extremely hurt and mistrustful for a while, and they understand and accept the consequences of that, and they talk about what they are missing in their marriage and take steps to remedy that.
For you, this is happening right now, in real time. For her, this happened a while ago. She may not understand that to you it feels like she is cheating on you right now, when she thinks it's over, it's no longer happening, problem solved. It doesn't bode weel that rather than taking all of the responsibility, she chose to blame you for not being sweet enough to her during your separation. She is being defensive, and trying to push some of the blame on you so that she doesn't have to feel as guilty. Her reaction is immature.
That said, you have an enormous investment in her, and she really is so lucky to have someone who loves her so much. You are not going to get over this soon. You might never get ove it. Only time will tell. I agree with The Maven in that you should not make any rash decisions. You need time to heal a bit before you can even discuss her infidelity with a bit less emotion, it could take a week, a month, or longer. When you come to that point, then talk to her. If she still tries to push off the blame, then perhaps counseling is in order, depending on how invested you both are in staying together.
Is she regretful? Is she tearful? Does she want to resolve this as much as you do, or is she quick to say, "I'm going to spend the night somewhere else"?
Only time will heal the wounds, unfortunately, and the deeper the wound, the more time it takes to heal. My suggestion is to take the job offer, move out if you must, even if it's just into a guest room, and work on the friendship, respect and love you felt for each other at the beginning. If it works out, you two can survive anything. If it doesn't, you will be in a much better place emotionally and financially to make the decision about where you want to be.
I really, honestly hope it all works out for you. She is so lucky to have someone that loves her so much. The key will be whether or not she realizes just how lucky she is, and is willing to do the work necessary to repair the damage done.

First off, my sincere condolences. My marriage went t!ts up due to infidelity 11 months after we entered the US, despite having lived together abroad for a couple of years before we made the move. He and I tried to reconcile for almost a year while living separately, and did six months of marital therapy. Ultimately, though, you both have to be committed to counselling to make it work, and he wasn't. (In retrospect, although the break-up was cataclysmic, I've come out the other end happier and healthier than I've ever been as an adult.)
You need to step back from all of this for a while, even though it is all you can think about (and will be for some time). What is the outcome you desire most of all? Is that outcome realistic? Does it involve her? Does she want to be involved?
There are many on here who will say once a cheater, always a cheater. Personally, I don't agree that this is always the case. But you do need to look at your wife's history in this matter, and determine whether you can trust her. I don't know about you, but what was most painful to me was that he lied to me. Not being with another woman, but all the lies. He still lies to me about what happened, even though he and I have grown to be friends again. When you marry someone, you open yourself to them completely, bring them yourself and trust them with your heart and soul and body. Breaking that trust can be fatal. Only you and she know whether the trust can be rebuilt.
My best advice would be not to do anything rash right now, when you are at your most vulnerable and most raw. It feels surreal, like you're walking in a dream, I know. If you can stay with friends now, do. Talk to your friends and family. They know you best. There are people on here who will tell you to go home, you have nothing invested here. Only you know how much you have invested here, in terms of life and relationship.
It is your decision. Be strong, and take courage.

Learn to enjoy life again on your own or with very good friends and family. There is so much for a singleton to do and enjoy. As much as you have seen the sham and ugly side of life, there is still so much beauty around to see and enjoy on your own. Depending on whats out there, join some groups like choirs, dancing classes, art or whatever takes your fancy. Embrace the single life and have fun,fun, fun. Along with it will come happiness, laughter and everything else. (F)

I agree with WOM about giving yourself some time. From what you've shared in this forum, the men you get involved with aren't good for you and the commom denominator in each relationship is you. Give yourself time to discover why you keep choosing toxic men. Having citizenship doesn't mean the guy can't be toxic or a user. I don't know if you're in therapy but maybe it would do some good to help find out what pattern you're following in choosing men? And I don't mean MENA guys, in general. Just because you haven't had a healthy and loving relationship in years doesn't mean you're 100 percent over it and ready to move on. Sad to say but the chances of a new relationship being healthy this soon are very slim. I wouldn't even advise you to have dinner or casual sex at this point. A sex toy would serve you better if sex is what you need. I'm saying this as someone who cares. I'd hate to see you travel down the same road you've been traveling down.
Ugh typos, please excuse. This phone kinda sucks sometimes.

I think this bs thing about giving email,facebook password is when you don't trust in your spouse. A matter of trust is when you have his/her bank account password. ####### your husband cheking your email,facebook and vice versa.It's so wrong and disrespectful for me.If he can't trust in your word In my opinion you are wasting your time with a freaking control guy.Do you have his email, facebook and bank account password?. Calling the cops because he didn't get things in his way it shows his caracters.Unfortunetely he can withdraw his I-864 and you will be without status here.I am not sure if you qualify for Vawa because considering what you posted here i believe your husband is just a freaking control person,besides that I don't see any abuse to support a Vawa claim.

Caryh really? I would not suggest to someone to take responsability for others wrong doings at all. YOU are responsible to recognize and apologize for your mistakes but not start the danger circle of apologizing for something you didn't cause, it's damn wrong.When you are wrong you are wrong and you should apologize for that,but when you are right you have to stand up for what you think is right and not to say sorry just to please the spouse,take this from someone married almost 10 years and we are damn happy.Unfortunetely she is in a terrible position here.If the guy is serious about her leaving the house OmG she will be out of status,risking to be deported and she won't be able to leave the Country with the child .It's a sad and danger situation tho.

Yes, your relationship has improved because she is getting what she wants, the green card. She wants that more than she wants you.