Thomas and Kristi

Congrats Grux!

I'm sorry, but it's hard to buy that someone leaves their third world country to be with the love of their life and when the marriage goes sour (usually at some immigration milestone), they can't leave and go home because they have nothing to go home to, particularly when they leave their spouse to seek refuge with their family member(s) or life-long friend(s) two cities over.

If my husband had changed after I immigrated to US, I'd leave him and go back to my home country. The purpose of the petition is to be re-united with family. I just find it hard to believe that immigrants are willing to stay over here at all cost after being subjected to abuse shortly after arriving in US claiming the marriage wasn't entered for immigration purposes.

Apparently USCIS now recognizes same sex marriage

Forget the age issue. The money issue is a bigger hindrance. Still being in high school, I would bet to say that her yearly income is not that much. You need to consider the financial factors, and indeed if you are mature enough, they will make sense to you.
Travel expenses. You two have at the very least 2 trips to make. One for the meeting in person and the other when you come over. This can be in the neighborhood of a couple of thousand dollars.
Filing of application expenses. Jay-Kay did a nice job of explaining that one. I will just say one thing about affidavit of support, "Who is going to sponsor you?" You should research the affidavit of support (I-134 and I-864)
Now, comes the goodies...
Life expenses
Car payment, unless hers is paid off already then that leads to:
Car Insurance. Since you guys are now married, both of you have to be maintained on the insurance. Since you both are under 25, your premiums will be very high.
Gas
Health Insurance
Dental Insurance.
Rent, I doubt you can qualify for a mortgage yet with neither of you having any work/wage history. Depending on where you live, this can be from moderate to outrageous.
Electricity
Water
Gas
I'm sure you both want to have a better education. So consider, College tuition. Just another wonderful added expense. A very small liberal public university will set you back $7,000/person per year
Do you like TV? Be prepared for the cable bill. HD and premium channels just boost that cost right on up.
Want to use the computer.. Yep you got it, add another bill on here... Internet
Oh yeah, and FOOD...
Keep in mind that you can't work until you get your Employment Authorization which comes after you are married and file for adjustment of status.
So, never mind what age you are, let's have a real honest discussion about the ability to take care of your family.
It is increasingly difficult to make ends meet. Divorce rate is high, finances have been shown to be a leading factor (right up there with infidelity).
Divorce Statistics
Understand, I am not saying that you can't do it, I am saying it is difficult and you need to be as prepared as possible, or you are setting yourself up for heartache later. Take the time to realize all the angles of getting married. Have an honest discussion with yourself and your fiance about how you 2 will overcome all of these issues.
Then, go for it.
Best of luck...

The K-1 process alone costs close to $2000, then to cost to move here... if you can't afford to meet, you can't afford the K-1.

Well, it's good to know you can break the rules and suffer no consequences. I would be fine with this if they sent them back to their home country until approval, just like those who legally entered had to do. I'm awfully vexed about a free filing as well.

There is nothing you can do now. Wait for the RFE. Anything you send now will not get matched up with your file. if you don't get a RFE, then they found it

Make sure to send a note to the Senator recognizing the Aide (by name) and for their assistance. The letter or note should be addressed to the Senator though. So very happy for you!

I think this has gotten quite off topic. Maybe this thread should be closed?

a woman posted an immigration related question, and the "advice" certain people start spewing is related to poor behavior being acceptable because of 1. culture and 2. a woman's place in a relationship according to the bible.
i think BOTH of these excuses are rather disgusting and i have every right to say it.
of course people are free to subject themselves to whatever religion they want, i was saying - we insist upon english only in the main forums and i think that koran quoting (which i never see on vj) or bible quoting (which i ALWAYS see on vj) or any other religious muck - should be kept to religious based forums. there is nothing unreasonable about that.

I want to clarify, it makes no difference if these applications are approved before election time. Thier approved application would have zero impact on the election. Why? They can't vote. They are conditional residents (2 year) on a deferred status, not citizens. The mere action of him providing this avenue however is an attempt to gain the approval (and votes of course) of the millions of hispanic citizens who may have family members or friends that will likely be affected by this.
Check out the Politics and Religion as I beleive there are a number of these threads already in existence.

I want to clarify, it makes no difference if these applications are approved before election time. Thier approved application would have zero impact on the election. Why? They can't vote. They are conditional residents (2 year) on a deferred status, not citizens. The mere action of him providing this avenue however is an attempt to gain the approval (and votes of course) of the millions of hispanic citizens who may have family members or friends that will likely be affected by this.
Check out the Politics and Religion as I beleive there are a number of these threads already in existence.

To be on the safe side, I would go ahead and get a certified copy as well as take your original. I found some threads relating to this same issue:
http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/246465-pakistani-birth-certificates-please-help/
http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/147777-case-pending-at-nvc-issues-with-pakistani-birth-certificate/
http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/89564-pakistani-birth-certificate/
I hope this is helpful. If it were me, I would go get an official certified copy so there were no questions and submit that with your AOS application.

I believe this situation would be best handled by a conversation with the man. Speak calmly, without getting angered. Anger never solves anything. Discuss how you feel and try to find ways the two of you can communicate in an effective manner. Communication is key to all healthy relationships. I wish you the best on your journey and hope that you are able to find the answers you seek directly from the person to whom it pertains.

I believe this situation would be best handled by a conversation with the man. Speak calmly, without getting angered. Anger never solves anything. Discuss how you feel and try to find ways the two of you can communicate in an effective manner. Communication is key to all healthy relationships. I wish you the best on your journey and hope that you are able to find the answers you seek directly from the person to whom it pertains.

Your legal status is pending Adjustment of Status should anyone ask, though I don't see why they would. Don't worry about that visa. You're fine. I don't know why someone would ask you for your passport, but again just mention you have applied for AOS if they do. You also are not allowed to leave the country unless you have advanced parole or approval.
So sit back, relax for a bit (and come here if you have questions). Best of luck on your journey!

FINALLY!!!!!
Since I hadn't heard anything in three weeks after I sent my RFE, I contacted my Congressman again. They got a reply from USCIS saying they got the RFE and to just wait. My Congressman told me to contact them if I didn't hear anything by mid-Sept. Well the next day I got the notification that the card was in production!! Got that on Aug 3 and on Aug 11 got the card.
So if anyone is waiting, contact your Congressman for sure!
Thanks to everyone for their support.

Well, that would be a very lucrative approach for the lawyer, but it probably wouldn't pan out very well for you. A VAWA self petition requires proof of "battery or extreme cruelty". Hiding food and water from you would rise to the level of extreme cruelty. Hiding facts from you would not. The angle the attorney is thinking about is that using someone's immigration status in order to try to manipulate or control them can be a form of abuse, but it needs to be part of a pattern of abuse, and not simply the only sort of abuse being claimed.
On the other hand, adjusting status through any other means will require your husband's cooperation to at least sign the I-864 and provide the supporting evidence. If your husband isn't willing to do that then VAWA may be your only other option. The simple fact is that your husband can't be forced to help you adjust status, and hiding facts from you is probably far short of the sort of evidence you'd need to prove a VAWA case.
I think you need to sit down with your husband and find out what's going on in his head. Either he wants you for his wife or he doesn't. If he wants you for his wife then he should be willing to help you obtain your immigration documents. Some people are just strongly adverse to dealing with government bureaucracies, and don't have the patience to jump through their hoops. I myself have a bit of that attitude every year when I prepare my tax return. If that's the case then let the lawyer handle the paperwork, and your husband only needs to sign the I-864.

Service requests put in by individuals mean nothing currently. Unless your representative or senator is putting in the inquiry for you, nothing is going to happen except getting a form letter reply.

Watch out! She'll be back once she finds out that she can't get a green card except through marriage to the K1 petitioner. This has happened numerous times here on VJ. Many scammers don't do their research before coming to the US. They have their eyes focused only on the visa. They come to the US, dump the petitioner and hit the road, and then find out that they cut the cord too quickly. They can't get a green card by marrying their secret boyfriend, and they can't file a VAWA claim. This is when they start trying to patch things up with the petitioner, saying they got scared and panicked. When that doesn't work she'll probably offer you some cash if you marry her and help her get a green card.
Save any correspondence for your fraud evidence package.

She probably already had another buyer lined up well before coming here. All you did is pay to unite them in the US. She will probably just stay here illegally like th emillions of others who walk the streets among us every day.
This is not your fault. You did nothing wrong. Like others said, forget her and move on. And don't let her sweet talk you into giving her another chance. It's possible that she planned to marry somebody else but doesn't know that she can't get a greencard marrying somebody else. And like another member said, she may try to beg to take her back. DON'T DO IT!!! Once she gets her greencard, you can bet she'll leave again.
Look at it this way... At least you didn't marry the bittch!

Everyone seems to be focusing on how tragic it would be not to allow legal status for the cases in question, but not one iota of empathy for people going through the ghastly legal immigration maze, and especially those who are denied for arbitrary and capricious reasons.
1986 was a total amnesty program for illegal aliens. That was an enormous signal to foreigners that so long as they could get here illegally, they would get legal status later and avoid all the fees, filings, interviews, travel, etc. - and here we are now with children of the next wave of illegal immigrants getting status. So these kinds of expectations have proved to be correct, and we encourage more of it everytime we do something like this.
I don't care because I am against all these immigration restrictions in the first place. It just irks me that legal immigration is about the most expensive and most difficult way to do it near as I can tell. Four years of fees, filings, cow-towing, and mistakes on their part every step of the way. It took ten months, six service requests, and a congressional investigation just to get an appointment for fingerprints. But they already had her fingerprints! They force you to use their technicians, and they did them wrong. We have made three 900 mile round trips just for fingerprints and we are going to have to make a fourth 900 mile round trip now because after screwing up her fingerprints for nearly a full year, her letter of extension has now expired. 3,600 miles of driving just over their inability to do fingerprints correctly plus all of the expenses involved in travel.
So if you are going to grant people amnesty outright, or grant amnesty to children of illegals, and make it so much easier and less expensive to do it illegally, then what is the fricking point of making it so difficult on legal immigrants?

Well, back to the topic...though the last page or so was quite entertaining...
Kal, I hope that you are able to obtain some additional evidence so you are able to proceed with your visa application. Further, if you have any other questions about the process please don't be discouraged to post them here for advice. You will get a far better answer from those with experience in that area than you will from a spritual leader, though he will be good to use for the emotional side of this (it's a long process that's sometimes hard on you).
I know sometimes it's hard to hear what others say and perceive. It may or may not be your situation, but just keep what they say in the back of your mind and trust your gut. We (afterall) have nothing to gain from giving you this advice. I hope it won't be a bad situation for your sake. A broken heart is hard to mend. Be careful on your trip and I wish you luck on your journey no matter where it takes you.

Well, back to the topic...though the last page or so was quite entertaining...
Kal, I hope that you are able to obtain some additional evidence so you are able to proceed with your visa application. Further, if you have any other questions about the process please don't be discouraged to post them here for advice. You will get a far better answer from those with experience in that area than you will from a spritual leader, though he will be good to use for the emotional side of this (it's a long process that's sometimes hard on you).
I know sometimes it's hard to hear what others say and perceive. It may or may not be your situation, but just keep what they say in the back of your mind and trust your gut. We (afterall) have nothing to gain from giving you this advice. I hope it won't be a bad situation for your sake. A broken heart is hard to mend. Be careful on your trip and I wish you luck on your journey no matter where it takes you.