AKSinghSingh79

"they are always very nice, very diplomatic, VERY GOOD psychologists. They are NOT stupid and NOT careless" ROFL you have GOT to be kidding with this post. The OP was spot on and a lot kinder than I would have been considering their circumstances which are sad. The entire process is demeaning for a K-1 and we jump through hoops, write checks, more hoops and then have a person say we do not have enoug money when we meet the guidleines, ask about sexual positions for a Stokes interview, deny poeple at will and sometimes without explanation, and then once you get here you cannot honeymoon outside of the USA until you get payrolled? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I feel so bad for the OP, my heart is with you here as I read some of your other posts and see you are sincere. GOD speed here to get you both together soon.

I agree with you to an extent. I too am a half of an inter-racial couple and I interviewed at Mumbai. While NWD seems to be on another level altogether, I will add my two cents.
The problem here is that of cultural norms. Inter-racial marriages are NOT the norm in India, even by a long shot. I will also insert here that there exists a double standard for men and women as well as blacks and whites (amongst Indians). The Embassy is very aware of these norms and prevalent attitudes. I can see the argument that an Indian willing to marry a non-Indian American is probably much more open minded and should perhaps be judged by American conventions instead. That works only to some extent. Attitudes cannot exist in a vacuum. This is where other factors such as social economic status, background, education, etc come into play. Bottom line: does the beneficiary's life experiences match up to his/her "Americanized" outlook towards marriage/relationship?
What I mean is a highly-educated, liberal, well-traveled man, belonging to the higher echelons of society wanting to marry a non-Indian American is easier to buy than a middle class, maybe/maybe not college educated young man living at home with his elderly parents in a rural/conservative part of the country wanting to marry a black woman he met online is simply not going to fly. Not in NWD. Which sees fraud on a daily basis. Much more than Chennai or Mumbai.
I have met many Indian men who are educated, progressive and are friendly with people of other races and religions. However, their son or daughter wants to marry someone of a different race/religion/caste? Not till hell freezes over. I have male friends who have no problems in having a white girlfriend but have no qualms admitting that they'll never marry them. As far as the Embassy is concerned, the beneficiaries do not have noble intentions; they simply want a ticket to the US. They will divorce their USC petitioner eventually and bring over a good, simple, homely Indian wife in a few short years. This does not even bother their conscience as their first spouse is not considered to be a "true" wife. I have seen men trolling internet cafes for American chicks. Sometimes parents are even in on the scam.
Now are there Indians who do live lives that are more appropriate with American conventions and norm and possibly have more "enlightened" outlooks towards life? Sure, I am one. I studied in the US and met my husband in college. We have common friends, we are of same age belong to the same (relative) socio-economic status. We also have the same educational background. I have traveled all over the world and the interviewer even remarked on the many entry/exit stamps in my passport. In this case, does it make sense that I would defy Indian societal norms and marry a white boy who I was living together "in sin" with? More importantly, are my parents like other average Indian parents? No, since they sent me to the US at age 18 (I mean, what good Indian parent does that? ), had no problems when Mr. Sachinky and I were living together. And they just couldn't stop gushing about their gora jamai. I am talking about my own case here since that is the only one I am qualified to give an opinion on and am not well-versed with anyone else's case. Just this: at the end of the day, the picture that is being painted has to make sense.
Disclaimer: I apologize for this lengthy post. Again, I am not saying that this particular Embassy is reasonable or am defending it. It is also not my intention to cause offence by attacking anyone else's relationship. I also am not trying to be racist and/or classist here (even if I am coming off as one). I am merely trying to correct this notion that Embassies deny visas just because the CO was having 'a bad day.'

You should have just said... "Love or green card? Neither. I'm just using him for sex.", and then walk away.

You've been scammed. Leave now. Go back to your grandmothers house. File for a divorce. Have no further contact with him. If he can't get a green by marriage then he'll try to get one through VAWA, which means claiming you abused him. Don't give him an opportunity to manufacture any evidence of this sort, like calling the cops on you.
DO NOT GO TO THE GREEN CARD INTERVIEW!!! I can virtually guarantee you would be subjected to a grueling Stokes interview, given his serious history with immigration. You DON'T want to go through this.
I can recall only one or two cases where the evidence of fraud was more clear than this one.

I am so very sorry that this happened to you, not just that she left you and treated you like this, but also for the loss of your dream of a happy life together, the life for which you have worked so hard and waited so long.
Please do follow AZ and hikergirl's advice. Her visa is only good for 90 days. If she discovers she was premature in her actions of leaving you since she has no legal grounds to remain in the US legally nor get a green card except through marriage to you, she may come 'repentantly back' saying she was overwrought or 'needed time because things were happening too quickly' and try to convince you that this was all innocent, hoping to win your trust enough so you will marry her and apply for a green card. Then, when she gets the green card she would again disappear. Others have been taken in by such pleas, wanting to keep that dream intact, wanting to believe in the promises of love, wanting to trust again . . . but it almost always leads to a second desertion and this time with the US partner on the hook for an enforceable affidavit of support.
Take care of yourself. Let your friends and family know so they can be there to support you right now and do provide USCIS with an 'update'. You may also wish to provide 'ICE' with the copies of the telephone addresses and a statement of what has happened so she is on their radar as well.
Good luck to you.

Visa applications do not expire. It was the I-129F petition approval that expired. When you marry and file an I-130 petition, that approval of THAT petition will not expire but they can still deny a visa. Whatever the reason for the denial this time, you'll still have to deal with overcoming it.

Forget the letters and affidavits. Those are tertiary evidence - the least likely to be believed by a USCIS adjudicator. They're more than willing to accept that you or your friends/family would lie on your behalf. Focus on the primary evidence first - travel documents, receipts bearing your name, passports with entry/exit stamps. Without at least some primary evidence they will not believe you met each other within the past two years. After that, provide at least some secondary evidence, such as photos together. Be sure to write the date, location, and who appears in the photo on the back. If you can nail those two then they'll accept your petition. You don't want or need to include letters or any other type of correspondence unless you're frontloading evidence for the consulate interview.

You inspire me!

You know, your jabs might be more powerful if you expressed your sentiments in properly spelled and punctuated sentences.

Most people dream of having the perfect wedding but we here just dream of having a wedding.
I personally am not fond of a huge elaborate ceremony and it boggles my mind how much some women obsess over every single minute detail of their wedding.
I joined TheKnot.com to help in creating a wedding guest list and wedding website but I sometimes get ridiculous emails like "practice your wedding hairstyle a few times before the actual day!" or "never have a friend or family member bake your wedding cake! Always hire a professional!" Ridiculously absurd. Who cares if your hair isn't perfect the day of your wedding? And if you want to have a friend or family member bake your cake, why not? Again, perfection does not have to be attained. It's one day!
I personally have more important things to think about than the color of ink that I'm printing my wedding invitations in or taste testing the food that will be served at our reception. Among these important things are actually getting my fiance here so we can procede with the said wedding
I don't want to remember the day of my wedding as the exact hue of my bridesmaid dresses or the flavor of the wedding cake or obessing about the exact placement of the table centerpieces.
I want to remember it as the day that I became legally wed to the most wonderful man and that we will never have to be separated again.
Maybe it's the whole immigration process, but my wedding day has really been placed into perspective for me. This whole planning receptions, rehearsal dinners, going on extreme weight loss plans, finding "the perfect florist" and other silly frivilous nonsense is not for me.
I just want to marry the love of my life, honor our cultural backgrounds, family and friends, with a small celebration afterwards and finally begin our lives together

Unless you have a family like mine. While they're supportive of the wedding they said to me, "You want to get married? Well you better start saving..."
And so it begins....

Most people dream of having the perfect wedding but we here just dream of having a wedding.
I personally am not fond of a huge elaborate ceremony and it boggles my mind how much some women obsess over every single minute detail of their wedding.
I joined TheKnot.com to help in creating a wedding guest list and wedding website but I sometimes get ridiculous emails like "practice your wedding hairstyle a few times before the actual day!" or "never have a friend or family member bake your wedding cake! Always hire a professional!" Ridiculously absurd. Who cares if your hair isn't perfect the day of your wedding? And if you want to have a friend or family member bake your cake, why not? Again, perfection does not have to be attained. It's one day!
I personally have more important things to think about than the color of ink that I'm printing my wedding invitations in or taste testing the food that will be served at our reception. Among these important things are actually getting my fiance here so we can procede with the said wedding
I don't want to remember the day of my wedding as the exact hue of my bridesmaid dresses or the flavor of the wedding cake or obessing about the exact placement of the table centerpieces.
I want to remember it as the day that I became legally wed to the most wonderful man and that we will never have to be separated again.
Maybe it's the whole immigration process, but my wedding day has really been placed into perspective for me. This whole planning receptions, rehearsal dinners, going on extreme weight loss plans, finding "the perfect florist" and other silly frivilous nonsense is not for me.
I just want to marry the love of my life, honor our cultural backgrounds, family and friends, with a small celebration afterwards and finally begin our lives together

Most people dream of having the perfect wedding but we here just dream of having a wedding.
I personally am not fond of a huge elaborate ceremony and it boggles my mind how much some women obsess over every single minute detail of their wedding.
I joined TheKnot.com to help in creating a wedding guest list and wedding website but I sometimes get ridiculous emails like "practice your wedding hairstyle a few times before the actual day!" or "never have a friend or family member bake your wedding cake! Always hire a professional!" Ridiculously absurd. Who cares if your hair isn't perfect the day of your wedding? And if you want to have a friend or family member bake your cake, why not? Again, perfection does not have to be attained. It's one day!
I personally have more important things to think about than the color of ink that I'm printing my wedding invitations in or taste testing the food that will be served at our reception. Among these important things are actually getting my fiance here so we can procede with the said wedding
I don't want to remember the day of my wedding as the exact hue of my bridesmaid dresses or the flavor of the wedding cake or obessing about the exact placement of the table centerpieces.
I want to remember it as the day that I became legally wed to the most wonderful man and that we will never have to be separated again.
Maybe it's the whole immigration process, but my wedding day has really been placed into perspective for me. This whole planning receptions, rehearsal dinners, going on extreme weight loss plans, finding "the perfect florist" and other silly frivilous nonsense is not for me.
I just want to marry the love of my life, honor our cultural backgrounds, family and friends, with a small celebration afterwards and finally begin our lives together

Most people dream of having the perfect wedding but we here just dream of having a wedding.
I personally am not fond of a huge elaborate ceremony and it boggles my mind how much some women obsess over every single minute detail of their wedding.
I joined TheKnot.com to help in creating a wedding guest list and wedding website but I sometimes get ridiculous emails like "practice your wedding hairstyle a few times before the actual day!" or "never have a friend or family member bake your wedding cake! Always hire a professional!" Ridiculously absurd. Who cares if your hair isn't perfect the day of your wedding? And if you want to have a friend or family member bake your cake, why not? Again, perfection does not have to be attained. It's one day!
I personally have more important things to think about than the color of ink that I'm printing my wedding invitations in or taste testing the food that will be served at our reception. Among these important things are actually getting my fiance here so we can procede with the said wedding
I don't want to remember the day of my wedding as the exact hue of my bridesmaid dresses or the flavor of the wedding cake or obessing about the exact placement of the table centerpieces.
I want to remember it as the day that I became legally wed to the most wonderful man and that we will never have to be separated again.
Maybe it's the whole immigration process, but my wedding day has really been placed into perspective for me. This whole planning receptions, rehearsal dinners, going on extreme weight loss plans, finding "the perfect florist" and other silly frivilous nonsense is not for me.
I just want to marry the love of my life, honor our cultural backgrounds, family and friends, with a small celebration afterwards and finally begin our lives together

Most people dream of having the perfect wedding but we here just dream of having a wedding.
I personally am not fond of a huge elaborate ceremony and it boggles my mind how much some women obsess over every single minute detail of their wedding.
I joined TheKnot.com to help in creating a wedding guest list and wedding website but I sometimes get ridiculous emails like "practice your wedding hairstyle a few times before the actual day!" or "never have a friend or family member bake your wedding cake! Always hire a professional!" Ridiculously absurd. Who cares if your hair isn't perfect the day of your wedding? And if you want to have a friend or family member bake your cake, why not? Again, perfection does not have to be attained. It's one day!
I personally have more important things to think about than the color of ink that I'm printing my wedding invitations in or taste testing the food that will be served at our reception. Among these important things are actually getting my fiance here so we can procede with the said wedding
I don't want to remember the day of my wedding as the exact hue of my bridesmaid dresses or the flavor of the wedding cake or obessing about the exact placement of the table centerpieces.
I want to remember it as the day that I became legally wed to the most wonderful man and that we will never have to be separated again.
Maybe it's the whole immigration process, but my wedding day has really been placed into perspective for me. This whole planning receptions, rehearsal dinners, going on extreme weight loss plans, finding "the perfect florist" and other silly frivilous nonsense is not for me.
I just want to marry the love of my life, honor our cultural backgrounds, family and friends, with a small celebration afterwards and finally begin our lives together

They set themselves up for this when they entered the US illegally. The pitiable situation they find themselves in now would not have happened if they hadn't broken the law to begin with. I do have sympathy for their children, but their situation is not the fault of the Alabama government or it's new law. They took the risk that something like this could happen when they entered illegally, and when they chose to have children in the United States. They presumed it wouldn't happen because the federal government has a record of selective law enforcement. The Alabama law mirrors federal law, with the additional caveat that it requires Alabama law enforcement officers to enforce the law. I'm a little disgusted with the media for trotting these people out with their sob stories and completely glossing over the fact that they got themselves into this mess voluntarily.
"I can't stop working. My daughters need shoes and other things."
She shouldn't be working in the US to begin with, and her employer is breaking the law by providing her with a job. What's next? "We're doing the work that Americans won't do!" What they really mean is that they're willing to work for slave wages because they don't have legal status, and there's no shortage of employers in the US who are more than happy to exploit them. If they had green cards then they too would be demanding minimum wage jobs. The ones who use fake ID's and Social Security numbers and lie on an I-9 form are even worse because they actually ARE taking a job that a US citizen or permanent resident would be happy to take.
I know a farmer who grows strawberries near the Northern California coast. He only sells his fruit through roadside stands and local farmer's markets. Because he doesn't have to pay distributors he gets to keep all the profit, so he can afford to pay minimum wage to strawberry pickers. He insists on proof of lawful presence for everyone who shows up for work, and he turns people away every day because he's got more than enough workers by the time the shift starts. Every day he says someone will show up and offer to work for half as much if he'll overlook their legal status. He just laughs and tells them to go find a farmer who is willing to break the law because he's not. Other farmers who sell their produce to distributors are forced to hire illegals because their competitors are hiring them, and the net result is artificially deflated prices.
This is the same reason that unemployment is so high in the US. We can't compete with Chinese labor costs, and we don't charge tariffs to offset the difference. Nobody can afford to produce anything in the US because their competitors will always be able to undercut their retail prices because they're getting their products made in China. Free trade is the reason the middle class are disappearing in America. It's not the greed on Wall Street.
Frankly, I think every state should enact laws similar to Alabama's. Eventually, there would be far fewer people in this situation because they'd simply stop coming if they know the chances of getting away with it were slim. Someone's willingness to break the law is directly proportional to their perceived chances of getting caught.

I will advise you as I would any female friend of mine OK. I'll start by saying I do not agree with what you are planning, its morally wrong!!
If you had doubts about the marriage, why the hell are you having a baby?????? You are now bringing a poor innocent child in to a mess!!!!!
I would say if you are 100% sure you want to leave your husband, I would do it sooner rather than later. No proof or knowledge of this (just a thought) but if your husband wants this baby there may be ways such as court orders that he can get to stop you leaving.
Is there no way you can try at the marriage? I'm sure you've invested a lot of emotion, time, money and energy into the whole process, surely its worth giving it a go.
Can you not embark on a life in America by yourself but near you husband??
Do you want you child at 18 hating you because YOU removed the chance it had of knowing its father properly?? You really having lots of thinking to do and I urge you to be an adult about the whole thing and not a selfish child.
Best of luck, I do feel for you being in this situation because I'm sure its not nice - just please do the right thing.

Age gap is not a reason to deny a visa, no, but at Consulates where a particular age gap is against the cultural norms it is a reason for them to take a hard look at the relationship and question its authenticity. The OP has received good advice about being prepared. Signed affidavits from his family especially, stating their awareness of and support for the relationship are definitely good. Good luck

I totally understand the thought of taking any advice online with a grain of salt however specific consulates/embassies have specific issues. In no way, shape, or form would I ever discount this type of advice for the Indian consulates coming from people who have had issues at that specific consulate.
I wouldn't go telling some couple going through Casablanca it's all gonna be coming up roses nor couples going through HCMC that it will be a walk in the park and not to be scared.
One just needs to search posts about specific consulates to start to see red flags that surface frequently. My opinion is that certain practices are typical for certain consulates - the specific cultural norms are taught and wavering from those norms leads to additional scrutiny. One should be able to have insight into what a CO thinks based on this...
Should people be running scared? No. But they should be informed. They shouldn't be completely blind sided that they may have a denial or AP or any myriad of issues....knowing what is "typical and customary" for that specific consulate. That is why questions like the OP's and the responses of those going through Indian consulates is so important.

I see nothing unfair about a USC getting priority over a GC holder. That is a USC's rights. A GC holder at one time, willingly came to the U.S. to work and settle on their own free will. As the above poster stated, if they had never left their home country, they would have never had an issue with being apart from their families.
I truly do sympathize with the pain experienced when being separated from your loved ones but I simply do not agree with you that GC holders should have the same priority as a USC.

I see nothing unfair about a USC getting priority over a GC holder. That is a USC's rights. A GC holder at one time, willingly came to the U.S. to work and settle on their own free will. As the above poster stated, if they had never left their home country, they would have never had an issue with being apart from their families.
I truly do sympathize with the pain experienced when being separated from your loved ones but I simply do not agree with you that GC holders should have the same priority as a USC.

Most people dream of having the perfect wedding but we here just dream of having a wedding.
I personally am not fond of a huge elaborate ceremony and it boggles my mind how much some women obsess over every single minute detail of their wedding.
I joined TheKnot.com to help in creating a wedding guest list and wedding website but I sometimes get ridiculous emails like "practice your wedding hairstyle a few times before the actual day!" or "never have a friend or family member bake your wedding cake! Always hire a professional!" Ridiculously absurd. Who cares if your hair isn't perfect the day of your wedding? And if you want to have a friend or family member bake your cake, why not? Again, perfection does not have to be attained. It's one day!
I personally have more important things to think about than the color of ink that I'm printing my wedding invitations in or taste testing the food that will be served at our reception. Among these important things are actually getting my fiance here so we can procede with the said wedding
I don't want to remember the day of my wedding as the exact hue of my bridesmaid dresses or the flavor of the wedding cake or obessing about the exact placement of the table centerpieces.
I want to remember it as the day that I became legally wed to the most wonderful man and that we will never have to be separated again.
Maybe it's the whole immigration process, but my wedding day has really been placed into perspective for me. This whole planning receptions, rehearsal dinners, going on extreme weight loss plans, finding "the perfect florist" and other silly frivilous nonsense is not for me.
I just want to marry the love of my life, honor our cultural backgrounds, family and friends, with a small celebration afterwards and finally begin our lives together

Most people dream of having the perfect wedding but we here just dream of having a wedding.
I personally am not fond of a huge elaborate ceremony and it boggles my mind how much some women obsess over every single minute detail of their wedding.
I joined TheKnot.com to help in creating a wedding guest list and wedding website but I sometimes get ridiculous emails like "practice your wedding hairstyle a few times before the actual day!" or "never have a friend or family member bake your wedding cake! Always hire a professional!" Ridiculously absurd. Who cares if your hair isn't perfect the day of your wedding? And if you want to have a friend or family member bake your cake, why not? Again, perfection does not have to be attained. It's one day!
I personally have more important things to think about than the color of ink that I'm printing my wedding invitations in or taste testing the food that will be served at our reception. Among these important things are actually getting my fiance here so we can procede with the said wedding
I don't want to remember the day of my wedding as the exact hue of my bridesmaid dresses or the flavor of the wedding cake or obessing about the exact placement of the table centerpieces.
I want to remember it as the day that I became legally wed to the most wonderful man and that we will never have to be separated again.
Maybe it's the whole immigration process, but my wedding day has really been placed into perspective for me. This whole planning receptions, rehearsal dinners, going on extreme weight loss plans, finding "the perfect florist" and other silly frivilous nonsense is not for me.
I just want to marry the love of my life, honor our cultural backgrounds, family and friends, with a small celebration afterwards and finally begin our lives together

but its ok for you to call that jenni guy a ####... surely that makes you a hypocrite??? comments like yours really wont help people change there mind because no one listens to people who shout at and abuse others just because they disagree with your opinion.... in fact all people like you do is make #### like me more stubborn and even more likely to disagree with you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Most people dream of having the perfect wedding but we here just dream of having a wedding.
I personally am not fond of a huge elaborate ceremony and it boggles my mind how much some women obsess over every single minute detail of their wedding.
I joined TheKnot.com to help in creating a wedding guest list and wedding website but I sometimes get ridiculous emails like "practice your wedding hairstyle a few times before the actual day!" or "never have a friend or family member bake your wedding cake! Always hire a professional!" Ridiculously absurd. Who cares if your hair isn't perfect the day of your wedding? And if you want to have a friend or family member bake your cake, why not? Again, perfection does not have to be attained. It's one day!
I personally have more important things to think about than the color of ink that I'm printing my wedding invitations in or taste testing the food that will be served at our reception. Among these important things are actually getting my fiance here so we can procede with the said wedding
I don't want to remember the day of my wedding as the exact hue of my bridesmaid dresses or the flavor of the wedding cake or obessing about the exact placement of the table centerpieces.
I want to remember it as the day that I became legally wed to the most wonderful man and that we will never have to be separated again.
Maybe it's the whole immigration process, but my wedding day has really been placed into perspective for me. This whole planning receptions, rehearsal dinners, going on extreme weight loss plans, finding "the perfect florist" and other silly frivilous nonsense is not for me.
I just want to marry the love of my life, honor our cultural backgrounds, family and friends, with a small celebration afterwards and finally begin our lives together