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craig5977

Thinking of adopting my wife's son

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Has anyone done the adoption process before?  We are getting married at the end of march 2019.

I have talked with her about it and the paperwork that needs to be done. She is Vietnamese, the original father is not listed on the birth certificate and has abandoned the son.

I am curious the process that needs to be done.

I am US Citizen, she is Vietnamese, we will file for CR-1 visa when I return to USA

Thanks in advance for any advice

Craig

 

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13 minutes ago, craig5977 said:

Has anyone done the adoption process before?  We are getting married at the end of march 2019.

I have talked with her about it and the paperwork that needs to be done. She is Vietnamese, the original father is not listed on the birth certificate and has abandoned the son.

I am curious the process that needs to be done.

I am US Citizen, she is Vietnamese, we will file for CR-1 visa when I return to USA

Thanks in advance for any advice

Craig

 

Honestly I would wait until they are both here in the USA and not even think about doing it in the Vietnam. 

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6 minutes ago, craig5977 said:

Has anyone done the adoption process before?  We are getting married at the end of march 2019.

I have talked with her about it and the paperwork that needs to be done. She is Vietnamese, the original father is not listed on the birth certificate and has abandoned the son.

I am curious the process that needs to be done.

I am US Citizen, she is Vietnamese, we will file for CR-1 visa when I return to USA

 

Is the son under 18? If yes, I don’t think you need to adopt the kid. As a US citizen, you can sponsor your stepson, provided he’s under 18. Of course you have to marry his mother first. After you two get married, you file two separate I-130 petitions, one for your wife and one for your stepson and follow the same steps to get the immigrant visas. Upon entering the US both of them will get the 2 year green cards immediately. 

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2 minutes ago, Cyberfx1024 said:

Honestly I would wait until they are both here in the USA and not even think about doing it in the Vietnam. 

Second that. I thought he was asking how to bring the step son over. OP, if you were interested in adoption, wait until they’re both here and legally adopt him. Much much much easier than trying an international adoption in Vietnam. And I am saying that as a Vietnamese.

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1 minute ago, USS_Voyager said:

Second that. I thought he was asking how to bring the step son over. OP, if you were interested in adoption, wait until they’re both here and legally adopt him. Much much much easier than trying an international adoption in Vietnam. And I am saying that as a Vietnamese.

I was thinking that exact same thing as well. Why try to make the case even more complex than it is by adopting in Vietnam? Concentrate on getting married and filing for the CR1/2 petition ASAP after marriage. 

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I agree with the others that the process will be so much easier to complete once you are in the United States and the CR-1 process is complete.  I considered adopting my wife's children, but so far there has been no reason for me to pursue that route now that we are in the United States.  My wife's daughter was born after her divorce and like the original poster, my wife did not include her father's name on the birth certificate.  Her son's certificate does list his father.  I was initially concerned that not being their "father" would make health care, school, and other paperwork much more difficult because I would not be legally permitted to act on their behalf.  However in Maryland (I don't know if it is the same in other states), I became their legal guardian once their mother and I were married. 

 

When completing paperwork for insurance, school, health care, etc, I include my name in the "parent or legal guardian" or "father" section.  My daughter was admitted to the emergency room a few months after arriving in the U.S.  Once I identified myself (verbally) as her father and gave them our insurance card, I didn't have to do anything else.  I claim them both on my taxes.  We were at the IRS yesterday getting a tax ID number for my stepson because he doesn't have a SSN yet.  No issues with IRS.  I even asked if they wanted our marriage certificate or other documents from the 4-inch-think immigration folder we have.  None of that was needed.

 

Except for the USCIS where I am the "petitioner" through the 2-year conditional green card stage, I am simply "legal guardian/father" everywhere else.   There are a few estate planning issues that could arise by not adopting, but those can be taking care of with some fairly easy estate and beneficiary assignment paperwork.  Perhaps we will reconsider as time passes, but for now, my kids don't care.  I am "Daddy" to all of them regardless of biology. 

 

Congratulations on your upcoming marriage and good luck to you and your family!

Jason

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On 3/6/2019 at 6:21 AM, JasonGG said:

I agree with the others that the process will be so much easier to complete once you are in the United States and the CR-1 process is complete.  I considered adopting my wife's children, but so far there has been no reason for me to pursue that route now that we are in the United States.  My wife's daughter was born after her divorce and like the original poster, my wife did not include her father's name on the birth certificate.  Her son's certificate does list his father.  I was initially concerned that not being their "father" would make health care, school, and other paperwork much more difficult because I would not be legally permitted to act on their behalf.  However in Maryland (I don't know if it is the same in other states), I became their legal guardian once their mother and I were married. 

 

When completing paperwork for insurance, school, health care, etc, I include my name in the "parent or legal guardian" or "father" section.  My daughter was admitted to the emergency room a few months after arriving in the U.S.  Once I identified myself (verbally) as her father and gave them our insurance card, I didn't have to do anything else.  I claim them both on my taxes.  We were at the IRS yesterday getting a tax ID number for my stepson because he doesn't have a SSN yet.  No issues with IRS.  I even asked if they wanted our marriage certificate or other documents from the 4-inch-think immigration folder we have.  None of that was needed.

 

Except for the USCIS where I am the "petitioner" through the 2-year conditional green card stage, I am simply "legal guardian/father" everywhere else.   There are a few estate planning issues that could arise by not adopting, but those can be taking care of with some fairly easy estate and beneficiary assignment paperwork.  Perhaps we will reconsider as time passes, but for now, my kids don't care.  I am "Daddy" to all of them regardless of biology. 

 

Congratulations on your upcoming marriage and good luck to you and your family!

Jason

Excellent advice and clearly stated.

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Hate to say this but I wouldn't adopt at all.  Once you have adopted and if things should not work out with spouse you are legally accountable financially.  Child support until 18 yrs of age in most states and maybe more.

 

What benefits are there to adopt??  so far I only experience decision making but with wife's notarized form I can make most decisions for child without her being present.

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