Met during exchange program

[Lescanas 1]

Hello guys

I'm from Brazil and I have been dating a US citizen for almost a year now and we're planning on getting engaged when he comes down here for New year's to meet my family. 

I met him during my exchange program and I broke a rule by dating him. My host family found out and I was put on probation until I left. Will that affect my case? 

Also, I had problems with my host family during my last semester, and before I left I started making a lot of questions about staying longer. (I didn't tell anyone, but it was because I wanted to be with my boyfriend for longer)(yes I know it sounds stupid but the heart wants what it wants)

Will those things affect my case negatively?

 

[Naes 12,205]

7 minutes ago, Lescanas said:

Hello guys

I'm from Brazil and I have been dating a US citizen for almost a year now and we're planning on getting engaged when he comes down here for New year's to meet my family. 

I met him during my exchange program and I broke a rule by dating him. My host family found out and I was put on probation until I left. Will that affect my case? 

Also, I had problems with my host family during my last semester, and before I left I started making a lot of questions about staying longer. (I didn't tell anyone, but it was because I wanted to be with my boyfriend for longer)(yes I know it sounds stupid but the heart wants what it wants)

Will those things affect my case negatively?

 

No it won't! It is not a real probation I believe it is one of those weird hosting rules? Which system did you use? (Rotary clubs has no dating rule for one I know)

 

and you asked questions but didn't overstay or break any law I believe so I don't think they have any say in his..

 

Edited November 7, 2017 by Naes

[Lescanas 1]

5 minutes ago, Naes said:

No it won't! It is not a real probation I believe it is one of those weird hosting rules? Which system did you use? (Rotary clubs has no dating rule for one I know)

 

It was ISE

When I first got to the us me and the other exchange students were told we weren't allowed to have sex, so I thought I was fine as long as we didn't do it, but then later on my representative told me I wasn't allowed to date at all and they told me I would be sent to Brazil and wouldn't be a allowed to be back in the US for 10 years if I violated my probation. 

I wasn't allowed to leave the house unless I was going to school or if my host parents were with me. 

 

Edited November 7, 2017 by Lescanas

[Naes 12,205]

14 minutes ago, Lescanas said:

It was ISE

When I first got to the us me and the other exchange students were told we weren't allowed to have sex, so I thought I was fine as long as we didn't do it, but then later on my representative told me I wasn't allowed to date at all and they told me I would be sent to Brazil and wouldn't be a allowed to be back in the US for 10 years if I violated my probation. 

I wasn't allowed to leave the house unless I was going to school or if my host parents were with me. 

 

Yeah they did the same to me in Japan... I am pretty sure they wanted to scare you.

 

they don't want babies basically... that's it. 

 

Simply, did you even go or meet to any kind of law officier? I'm sure no. 

Do they have legal binding to stop someone from communication??? No

 

for what is worth what they did to you by binding you to the house and telling you false information and threatening you is illegal. 

 

Do do you even keep any contact with these people? You or your partner?

Edited November 7, 2017 by Naes

[Lescanas 1]

2 minutes ago, Naes said:

Yeah they did the same to me in Japan... I am pretty sure they wanted to scare you.

 

they don't want babies basically... that's it. 

 

Simply, did you even go or meet to any kind of law officier? I'm sure no. 

Do they have legal binding to stop someone from communication??? No

 

for what is worth what they did to you by binding you to the house and telling you false information and threatening you is illegal. 

I understand, I felt they were just doing their best to scare me but I was so scared of never seeing my boyfriend again that I just obeyed them without much questioning. Do you think they will contact my school/exchange program to ask about it?

[Naes 12,205]

God this makes me so furious what these people can do!

 

literally went through similar things and this is bullying!! This is mental bullying! 

 

I made them apologize to me 10 years later!!! 

[Naes 12,205]

1 minute ago, Lescanas said:

I understand, I felt they were just doing their best to scare me but I was so scared of never seeing my boyfriend again that I just obeyed them without much questioning. Do you think they will contact my school/exchange program to ask about it?

No sweetie no. Don't worry.

what they did is not legal. No one will call them or even consider them. Do not even mention this rules! These are ridiculous you did nothing wrong!!

 

just write that you met during your exchange year and fell in love. This is the truth not what they put you guys through.

 

you did not overstayed. You did nothing illegal from what I understand. You don't even need to talk about or think about these people.

I'm so happy it didn't make you hate the country or the general population. 

[Lescanas 1]

2 minutes ago, Naes said:

No sweetie no. Don't worry.

what they did is not legal. No one will call them or even consider them. Do not even mention this rules! These are ridiculous you did nothing wrong!!

 

just write that you met during your exchange year and fell in love. This is the truth not what they put you guys through.

 

you did not overstayed. You did nothing illegal from what I understand. You don't even need to talk about or think about these people.

I'm so happy it didn't make you hate the country or the general population. 

I understand

Thank you for getting this weight off my shoulders!

I'm sorry for the reactions to your posts lol I was just seeing what those thingys did. 

You made me feel so much better! Thank you very much.

This exchange program did me wrong a lot of times... They even drug tested me without permission from my family and from what I've been told that's very illegal. I'm happy I don't have any contact with them anymore. 

 

Did you really make them apologize? Lmao that's great

 

[Naes 12,205]

28 minutes ago, Lescanas said:

I understand

Thank you for getting this weight off my shoulders!

I'm sorry for the reactions to your posts lol I was just seeing what those thingys did. 

You made me feel so much better! Thank you very much.

This exchange program did me wrong a lot of times... They even drug tested me without permission from my family and from what I've been told that's very illegal. I'm happy I don't have any contact with them anymore. 

 

Did you really make them apologize? Lmao that's great

 

Are you kidding of course I made them apologize! In the middle of a club meeting! 

 

It's been 15 years since mine and I came back to japan for univeristy and now I'm working here. But those scars didn't go away, I love this country but mine was so big in so many ways I realized I couldn't overcome this even now. It takes sooo much to trust any Japanese person for me now. Nothing racist but more like I feel like they're going to hurt me some way.

 

Those things are illegal on their side, please don't worry and just enjoy your relationship and engagement.. they are not worth it. 

[T_P 872]

2 hours ago, Lescanas said:

Hello guys

I'm from Brazil and I have been dating a US citizen for almost a year now and we're planning on getting engaged when he comes down here for New year's to meet my family. 

I met him during my exchange program and I broke a rule by dating him. My host family found out and I was put on probation until I left. Will that affect my case? 

Also, I had problems with my host family during my last semester, and before I left I started making a lot of questions about staying longer. (I didn't tell anyone, but it was because I wanted to be with my boyfriend for longer)(yes I know it sounds stupid but the heart wants what it wants)

Will those things affect my case negatively?

 

Like others already said, you will be fine. During your initial process, just explain the circumstances of how you met your fiancee, be clear, be straight forward and HONEST. K1 is a long journey and yu dont want to me surprised by something you couldve dont right. 

 

I`m also from Brazil and if you ever need to clarify anything from the process, please let me know. Good Luck

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

17 hours ago, Lescanas said:

It was ISE

When I first got to the us me and the other exchange students were told we weren't allowed to have sex, so I thought I was fine as long as we didn't do it, but then later on my representative told me I wasn't allowed to date at all and they told me I would be sent to Brazil and wouldn't be a allowed to be back in the US for 10 years if I violated my probation. 

I wasn't allowed to leave the house unless I was going to school or if my host parents were with me. 

 

 

They can't stop you from having sex if you are of the age of consent wherever you are living.  Dating is also fine - there are a few Scandinavian-American couples around where I live that met from exchange programs.  It is normal.  

 

However, the way they treated you was terrible.  I'm really upset on your behalf.  

[David & Diana R 1,005]

23 hours ago, Lescanas said:

It was ISE

When I first got to the us me and the other exchange students were told we weren't allowed to have sex, so I thought I was fine as long as we didn't do it, but then later on my representative told me I wasn't allowed to date at all and they told me I would be sent to Brazil and wouldn't be a allowed to be back in the US for 10 years if I violated my probation. 

I wasn't allowed to leave the house unless I was going to school or if my host parents were with me. 

 

OMG!  Nonsense!  You are fine.  Love comes when it comes.  I wish you both a very happy life together.  God Bless you both,  Aloha David

[David & Diana R 1,005]

23 hours ago, Lescanas said:

I understand, I felt they were just doing their best to scare me but I was so scared of never seeing my boyfriend again that I just obeyed them without much questioning. Do you think they will contact my school/exchange program to ask about it?

You did the right thing.  Now that you are back home can get to know this bf by long distance communication.  Even if they contact your school they cannot keep you from seeing your bf when he comes to visit you.  They cannot derail your future plans.