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mymarriagejourney

Extremely premature question about red flags...

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This isn't about my relationship. My husband has his 10 year GC and will be applying for citizenship in 6 months.

A friend of mine (USC) became FB friends with a friend of my husband (Jordanian) a while back. Normal enough. Well, last night my friend told me that she has a bit of a crush on him. (I don't think he knows that yet...but I suspect he might feel likewise.) I seriously almost told her to forget about that little crush and stop communicating with him. Why? Because I fear that if this little crush actually progressed as far as a serious thing, that the fact that they met through friends, one of them being also Jordanian, would be a major hurdle.

I feel like she'd actually listen to my advice at this stage because she's nowhere near in too deep yet. But, the flip side of the coin is that I actually believe they are quite well suited and I don't want to interfere with what could have the potential to be a good thing. If they actually aren't going to go to hell and back based on the introduction circumstances, I won't try to dissuade her.

Red flag? Not red flag?


07/19/12 - Married

Adjustment of Status from F-1 Student Visa: Day 00 - 07/20/12 - Sent I-130, I-485, I-765, I-131

Day 03 - 07/23/12 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in Chicago - signed for by D Colonna

Day 11 - 08/03/12 - Acceptance confirmation texts and emails

Day 14 - 08/06/12 - Checks cleared

Day 18 - 08/10/12 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 08/06/12 for appointment on 08/30/12)

Day 22 - 08/14/12 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office (We were the only ones there!)

Day 25 - 08/17/12 - Received NOAs

Day 36 - 08/28/12 - Notice via text of interview on 10/02/12

Day 38 - 08/30/12 - Received interview notice hard copy

Day 65 - 09/24/12 - Notice via text of I-131 approval

Day 71 - 10/02/12 - Interview

Day 71 - 10/02/12 - Text messages of APPROVAL of I-130 and I-485 - Card in Production

Day 78 - 10/09/12 - Received Welcome Notice

Day 80 - 10/11/12 - Received Conditional Green Card

Removal of Conditions: Day 00 - 07/07/14 - Sent I-751

Day 03 - 07/10/14 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in California

Day 07 - 07/14/14 - Check cleared

Day 07 - 07/14/14 - Received NOA (dated 07/10/14)

Day 14 - 07/21/14 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 07/17/14 for appointment on 08/01/14)

Day 18 - 07/25/14 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office (We were the only ones there...again!)

Day 38 - 08/14/14 - Text message of APPROVAL of 1-751 - Card in Production

Day 43 - 08/19/14 - Notice via text indicating card has been mailed

Day 44 - 08/20/14 - Notice via text with USPS tracking number

Day 46 - 08/22/14 - Received Permanent Green Card

Naturalization: Day 00 - 08/21/15 - Sent N-400

Day 03 - 08/24/15 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in Arizona

Day 07 - 08/28/15 - Check cleared

Day 10 - 08/31/15 - Acceptance confirmation text and email

Day 14 - 09/04/15 - Received NOA (dated 08/28/15)

Day 24 - 09/14/15 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 09/05/15 for appointment on 09/21/15)

Day 28 - 09/18/15 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office

Day 32 - 09/22/15 - Notice via text and email indicating in line for testing and interview

Day 35 - 09/25/15 - Notice via text and email indicating interview is scheduled

Day 41 - 10/01/15 - Received interview appointment notice (dated 09/28/15 for appointment on 11/03/15)
Day 73 - 11/03/15 - Interview

Day 74 - 11/04/15 - Text message of APPROVAL of N-400 - Oath Ceremony Scheduled

Day 75 - 11/05/15 - Received Oath Ceremony appointment notice (dated 11/04/15 for appointment on 11/17/15)

Day 87 - 11/17/15 - Oath Ceremony - US CITIZEN

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I am not an expert on the issues of being with someone from Jordan and how difficult the whole visa process is if you are so I can't tell you red flag no red flag. But I do know that love can overcome everything.

So instead of telling her to not have contact with him anymore, maybe let her know all the things that could happen and let her be prepared IF they would actually get to a stage where they feel there is more than just a crush? :) At least then she knows what she is getting herself into and she can decide if it's worth it or not.






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That's what I meant by "dissuade." If it was a red flag and it would mean a lot of mess, I know her well enough to know that she would decide to dismiss a "crush" and simply not pursue anything further. She actively avoids highly troublesome situations. That doesn't mean that if her heart became involved that she wouldn't go through them. But, seriously, if this introduction thing is a big red flag and she has the potential of being crushed because of immigration issues, I'd like to give my 2 cents in an effort to spare her.

This is coming from me, who had a zillion red flags with my husband...but she and I are different people. I'm actually not a control freak and stay out of stuff 99% of the time. I just know her well and I'm just trying to be a good friend to her and warn her if this is a nasty hurdle. She can do what she wants, obviously, and I will fully support her.


Edited by mymarriagejourney

07/19/12 - Married

Adjustment of Status from F-1 Student Visa: Day 00 - 07/20/12 - Sent I-130, I-485, I-765, I-131

Day 03 - 07/23/12 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in Chicago - signed for by D Colonna

Day 11 - 08/03/12 - Acceptance confirmation texts and emails

Day 14 - 08/06/12 - Checks cleared

Day 18 - 08/10/12 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 08/06/12 for appointment on 08/30/12)

Day 22 - 08/14/12 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office (We were the only ones there!)

Day 25 - 08/17/12 - Received NOAs

Day 36 - 08/28/12 - Notice via text of interview on 10/02/12

Day 38 - 08/30/12 - Received interview notice hard copy

Day 65 - 09/24/12 - Notice via text of I-131 approval

Day 71 - 10/02/12 - Interview

Day 71 - 10/02/12 - Text messages of APPROVAL of I-130 and I-485 - Card in Production

Day 78 - 10/09/12 - Received Welcome Notice

Day 80 - 10/11/12 - Received Conditional Green Card

Removal of Conditions: Day 00 - 07/07/14 - Sent I-751

Day 03 - 07/10/14 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in California

Day 07 - 07/14/14 - Check cleared

Day 07 - 07/14/14 - Received NOA (dated 07/10/14)

Day 14 - 07/21/14 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 07/17/14 for appointment on 08/01/14)

Day 18 - 07/25/14 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office (We were the only ones there...again!)

Day 38 - 08/14/14 - Text message of APPROVAL of 1-751 - Card in Production

Day 43 - 08/19/14 - Notice via text indicating card has been mailed

Day 44 - 08/20/14 - Notice via text with USPS tracking number

Day 46 - 08/22/14 - Received Permanent Green Card

Naturalization: Day 00 - 08/21/15 - Sent N-400

Day 03 - 08/24/15 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in Arizona

Day 07 - 08/28/15 - Check cleared

Day 10 - 08/31/15 - Acceptance confirmation text and email

Day 14 - 09/04/15 - Received NOA (dated 08/28/15)

Day 24 - 09/14/15 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 09/05/15 for appointment on 09/21/15)

Day 28 - 09/18/15 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office

Day 32 - 09/22/15 - Notice via text and email indicating in line for testing and interview

Day 35 - 09/25/15 - Notice via text and email indicating interview is scheduled

Day 41 - 10/01/15 - Received interview appointment notice (dated 09/28/15 for appointment on 11/03/15)
Day 73 - 11/03/15 - Interview

Day 74 - 11/04/15 - Text message of APPROVAL of N-400 - Oath Ceremony Scheduled

Day 75 - 11/05/15 - Received Oath Ceremony appointment notice (dated 11/04/15 for appointment on 11/17/15)

Day 87 - 11/17/15 - Oath Ceremony - US CITIZEN

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That's what I meant by "dissuade." If it was a red flag and it would mean a lot of mess, I know her well enough to know that she would decide to dismiss a "crush" and simply not pursue anything further. She actively avoids highly troublesome situations. That doesn't mean that if her heart became involved that she wouldn't go through them. But, seriously, if this introduction thing is a big red flag and she has the potential of being crushed because of immigration issues, I'd like to give my 2 cents in an effort to spare her.

This is coming from me, who had a zillion red flags with my husband...but she and I are different people. I'm actually not a control freak and stay out of stuff 99% of the time. I just know her well and I'm just trying to be a good friend to her and warn her if this is a nasty hurdle. She can do what she wants, obviously, and I will fully support her.

I disagree I think because she was introduced to this gentleman it removes the red flag and is more of a normal way to meet someone on the net or in person. One thing they see as a red flag is randomly meeting on the internet, which to me is foolish but you have to have tons of proof of a relationship when you meet this way. But to be introduced to someone on the internet, you know her well and he is your husbands friend removed that stigma. So I would just leave that part alone and maybe let her know what you went through with out saying this might happen to you. If she already knows then your job is done. :D Just my cent and a half.


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I met Moath online and we have big HUGE red flags and we have had a relatively easy time with immigration. As long as they meet and have a lot of evidence to prove their relationship they should be fine. Jordan isn't as high fraud country as countries in the Middle East go. If you want to direct her to me on FB I would be glad to talk to her :)



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Is she Jordanian?


“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

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Is she Jordanian?

No, like me, she is a born and raised midwesterner.


07/19/12 - Married

Adjustment of Status from F-1 Student Visa: Day 00 - 07/20/12 - Sent I-130, I-485, I-765, I-131

Day 03 - 07/23/12 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in Chicago - signed for by D Colonna

Day 11 - 08/03/12 - Acceptance confirmation texts and emails

Day 14 - 08/06/12 - Checks cleared

Day 18 - 08/10/12 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 08/06/12 for appointment on 08/30/12)

Day 22 - 08/14/12 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office (We were the only ones there!)

Day 25 - 08/17/12 - Received NOAs

Day 36 - 08/28/12 - Notice via text of interview on 10/02/12

Day 38 - 08/30/12 - Received interview notice hard copy

Day 65 - 09/24/12 - Notice via text of I-131 approval

Day 71 - 10/02/12 - Interview

Day 71 - 10/02/12 - Text messages of APPROVAL of I-130 and I-485 - Card in Production

Day 78 - 10/09/12 - Received Welcome Notice

Day 80 - 10/11/12 - Received Conditional Green Card

Removal of Conditions: Day 00 - 07/07/14 - Sent I-751

Day 03 - 07/10/14 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in California

Day 07 - 07/14/14 - Check cleared

Day 07 - 07/14/14 - Received NOA (dated 07/10/14)

Day 14 - 07/21/14 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 07/17/14 for appointment on 08/01/14)

Day 18 - 07/25/14 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office (We were the only ones there...again!)

Day 38 - 08/14/14 - Text message of APPROVAL of 1-751 - Card in Production

Day 43 - 08/19/14 - Notice via text indicating card has been mailed

Day 44 - 08/20/14 - Notice via text with USPS tracking number

Day 46 - 08/22/14 - Received Permanent Green Card

Naturalization: Day 00 - 08/21/15 - Sent N-400

Day 03 - 08/24/15 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in Arizona

Day 07 - 08/28/15 - Check cleared

Day 10 - 08/31/15 - Acceptance confirmation text and email

Day 14 - 09/04/15 - Received NOA (dated 08/28/15)

Day 24 - 09/14/15 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 09/05/15 for appointment on 09/21/15)

Day 28 - 09/18/15 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office

Day 32 - 09/22/15 - Notice via text and email indicating in line for testing and interview

Day 35 - 09/25/15 - Notice via text and email indicating interview is scheduled

Day 41 - 10/01/15 - Received interview appointment notice (dated 09/28/15 for appointment on 11/03/15)
Day 73 - 11/03/15 - Interview

Day 74 - 11/04/15 - Text message of APPROVAL of N-400 - Oath Ceremony Scheduled

Day 75 - 11/05/15 - Received Oath Ceremony appointment notice (dated 11/04/15 for appointment on 11/17/15)

Day 87 - 11/17/15 - Oath Ceremony - US CITIZEN

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I met Moath online and we have big HUGE red flags and we have had a relatively easy time with immigration. As long as they meet and have a lot of evidence to prove their relationship they should be fine. Jordan isn't as high fraud country as countries in the Middle East go. If you want to direct her to me on FB I would be glad to talk to her :)

Thank you for that offer. If the time every comes, you KNOW I will take you up on that! :) It's not nearly to that point yet. At all. They just have a very casual friendship right now and she told me she has a little crush. Maybe it will never progress to anything at all, but I almost opened my mouth to try to nip it in the bud. My mind started racing because back when we were getting ready to AOS, everyone was telling me that the fact that I was introduced to my husband through his brother was going to send immigration screaming. Well, that didn't happen at all. But, he was also already in the US on an F1 visa, and I think we had a lot easier time with the kindly Columbus, Ohio IO than one might have when they are trying to get visas from the consulates.


07/19/12 - Married

Adjustment of Status from F-1 Student Visa: Day 00 - 07/20/12 - Sent I-130, I-485, I-765, I-131

Day 03 - 07/23/12 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in Chicago - signed for by D Colonna

Day 11 - 08/03/12 - Acceptance confirmation texts and emails

Day 14 - 08/06/12 - Checks cleared

Day 18 - 08/10/12 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 08/06/12 for appointment on 08/30/12)

Day 22 - 08/14/12 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office (We were the only ones there!)

Day 25 - 08/17/12 - Received NOAs

Day 36 - 08/28/12 - Notice via text of interview on 10/02/12

Day 38 - 08/30/12 - Received interview notice hard copy

Day 65 - 09/24/12 - Notice via text of I-131 approval

Day 71 - 10/02/12 - Interview

Day 71 - 10/02/12 - Text messages of APPROVAL of I-130 and I-485 - Card in Production

Day 78 - 10/09/12 - Received Welcome Notice

Day 80 - 10/11/12 - Received Conditional Green Card

Removal of Conditions: Day 00 - 07/07/14 - Sent I-751

Day 03 - 07/10/14 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in California

Day 07 - 07/14/14 - Check cleared

Day 07 - 07/14/14 - Received NOA (dated 07/10/14)

Day 14 - 07/21/14 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 07/17/14 for appointment on 08/01/14)

Day 18 - 07/25/14 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office (We were the only ones there...again!)

Day 38 - 08/14/14 - Text message of APPROVAL of 1-751 - Card in Production

Day 43 - 08/19/14 - Notice via text indicating card has been mailed

Day 44 - 08/20/14 - Notice via text with USPS tracking number

Day 46 - 08/22/14 - Received Permanent Green Card

Naturalization: Day 00 - 08/21/15 - Sent N-400

Day 03 - 08/24/15 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in Arizona

Day 07 - 08/28/15 - Check cleared

Day 10 - 08/31/15 - Acceptance confirmation text and email

Day 14 - 09/04/15 - Received NOA (dated 08/28/15)

Day 24 - 09/14/15 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 09/05/15 for appointment on 09/21/15)

Day 28 - 09/18/15 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office

Day 32 - 09/22/15 - Notice via text and email indicating in line for testing and interview

Day 35 - 09/25/15 - Notice via text and email indicating interview is scheduled

Day 41 - 10/01/15 - Received interview appointment notice (dated 09/28/15 for appointment on 11/03/15)
Day 73 - 11/03/15 - Interview

Day 74 - 11/04/15 - Text message of APPROVAL of N-400 - Oath Ceremony Scheduled

Day 75 - 11/05/15 - Received Oath Ceremony appointment notice (dated 11/04/15 for appointment on 11/17/15)

Day 87 - 11/17/15 - Oath Ceremony - US CITIZEN

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I think you're overthinking it. They've only talked online at this point, right? Their crush might not turn into a relationship. If it does turn into a relationship, they might break up before getting married. And even if they get married, they might decide to live in Jordan instead of the US.

At the same time, I would encourage her not to put all her eggs in one basket too soon. Intercultural, long-distance relationships have a fair number of hurdles and visa issues are the least of them.


9/2011: Met in Morocco

12/2011: Trip to Europe together

1/2012: My trip to his hometown

11/2012: His first trip to USA

1/2014: His second trip to USA

3/2014: Married

Adjusting from a B visa

6/25/2014: Sent AOS package (I-130, I-485, I-765, I-131)

6/28/2014: Package received at Chicago Lockbox

7/2/2014: Text and email notifications

7/2/2014: Checks cashed

7/8/2014: Hard copy NOAs received

7/25/2014: Biometrics appointment

7/25/2014: RFE for foreign birth certificate

7/26/2014: RFE responded to

7/30/2014: RFE response received

8/14/2014: Status changed to "Testing and Interview"

8/29/2014: EAD and AP card production ordered

9/10/2014: EAD and AP card received

9/27/2014: Interview letter received

9/29/2014: SS card applied for

10/4/2014: SS card received

10/28/2014: Interview - approved pending final background check; online status updated that night

11/1/2014: Welcome letter

11/4/2014: GC in hand

ROC

8/13/2016: Sent I-751 Package

8/15/2016: Package received at CSC

8/17/2016: Check cashed

8/19/2016: NOA1

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I do overthink things, true enough. But, I do have my reasons this time: namely, that I know my friend pretty well. I'd kinda prefer not to get into specifics on the reason I asked this question so prematurely. But, I really just know and care about my friend.


07/19/12 - Married

Adjustment of Status from F-1 Student Visa: Day 00 - 07/20/12 - Sent I-130, I-485, I-765, I-131

Day 03 - 07/23/12 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in Chicago - signed for by D Colonna

Day 11 - 08/03/12 - Acceptance confirmation texts and emails

Day 14 - 08/06/12 - Checks cleared

Day 18 - 08/10/12 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 08/06/12 for appointment on 08/30/12)

Day 22 - 08/14/12 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office (We were the only ones there!)

Day 25 - 08/17/12 - Received NOAs

Day 36 - 08/28/12 - Notice via text of interview on 10/02/12

Day 38 - 08/30/12 - Received interview notice hard copy

Day 65 - 09/24/12 - Notice via text of I-131 approval

Day 71 - 10/02/12 - Interview

Day 71 - 10/02/12 - Text messages of APPROVAL of I-130 and I-485 - Card in Production

Day 78 - 10/09/12 - Received Welcome Notice

Day 80 - 10/11/12 - Received Conditional Green Card

Removal of Conditions: Day 00 - 07/07/14 - Sent I-751

Day 03 - 07/10/14 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in California

Day 07 - 07/14/14 - Check cleared

Day 07 - 07/14/14 - Received NOA (dated 07/10/14)

Day 14 - 07/21/14 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 07/17/14 for appointment on 08/01/14)

Day 18 - 07/25/14 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office (We were the only ones there...again!)

Day 38 - 08/14/14 - Text message of APPROVAL of 1-751 - Card in Production

Day 43 - 08/19/14 - Notice via text indicating card has been mailed

Day 44 - 08/20/14 - Notice via text with USPS tracking number

Day 46 - 08/22/14 - Received Permanent Green Card

Naturalization: Day 00 - 08/21/15 - Sent N-400

Day 03 - 08/24/15 - Confirmation from USPS that package was received in Arizona

Day 07 - 08/28/15 - Check cleared

Day 10 - 08/31/15 - Acceptance confirmation text and email

Day 14 - 09/04/15 - Received NOA (dated 08/28/15)

Day 24 - 09/14/15 - Received biometrics appointment notice (dated 09/05/15 for appointment on 09/21/15)

Day 28 - 09/18/15 - Completed biometrics via successful walk-in at Columbus, OH office

Day 32 - 09/22/15 - Notice via text and email indicating in line for testing and interview

Day 35 - 09/25/15 - Notice via text and email indicating interview is scheduled

Day 41 - 10/01/15 - Received interview appointment notice (dated 09/28/15 for appointment on 11/03/15)
Day 73 - 11/03/15 - Interview

Day 74 - 11/04/15 - Text message of APPROVAL of N-400 - Oath Ceremony Scheduled

Day 75 - 11/05/15 - Received Oath Ceremony appointment notice (dated 11/04/15 for appointment on 11/17/15)

Day 87 - 11/17/15 - Oath Ceremony - US CITIZEN

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