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Filed: Other Country: Pakistan
Timeline
Posted

Hi guys ,With a very heavy heart and continuous tears I want to know what happens if your spouse wants to divorce or leave a person who came to the US on a k1 visa and got a temporary green card? What becomes of that immigrant spouse? Does he/she have to move back to the country they came from? or there is still a way to seek permanent residence here without the green card being temporary? I came to the US in Nov 2011 and got my temporary green card in September 2012. This gc will expire in September 2014. Me and my husband are having very difficult problems. After moving here I cam to find out that he is a heavy marijuana smoker, and painkiller abuser. He had told me that he had merely "tried" marijuana and will never do it again, before, I arrived here. So i Trusted him, however the real problem emerged with the financial situation we are in. Money is tight and he spends it all on getting high and does not refrain from physically and emotionally abusing me over it. He has choked me to the point where I started to feel that im passing out and pushing and shoving is very common. I never thought this could happen as he was the sweetest person i ever knew and I knew him since we were both 16 yrs old and got married at 25. At this point, I don't know what to do as he threatens to leave and divorce almost every day. and today as soon as i Got home from work he pushed me off the chair, started throwing stuff around and started cursing at me and telling me he will kill me. He asked to transfer his half of the rent that he paid at the beginning of the month into his account and that he will leave tomorrow and go to a nearby city where he has some family members. I've never asked for help on a public forum but I really dont know what to do? I recently got into a graduate program at the local university and i start classes in september. I don't want this bad relationship to ruin my whole life. I wanto to be able to atleast work, study and move on even if this relationship wont work. I need you guys to share if there are any options out othere for people like me to still continue their naturalization process. Thank you

Love Conquers All...

Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
Timeline
Posted (edited)

Kay beat me to the transfer. :)

Edited by TBoneTX

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Pakistan
Timeline
Posted

Hi guys ,With a very heavy heart and continuous tears I want to know what happens if your spouse wants to divorce or leave a person who came to the US on a k1 visa and got a temporary green card? What becomes of that immigrant spouse? Does he/she have to move back to the country they came from? or there is still a way to seek permanent residence here without the green card being temporary? I came to the US in Nov 2011 and got my temporary green card in September 2012. This gc will expire in September 2014. Me and my husband are having very difficult problems. After moving here I cam to find out that he is a heavy marijuana smoker, and painkiller abuser. He had told me that he had merely "tried" marijuana and will never do it again, before, I arrived here. So i Trusted him, however the real problem emerged with the financial situation we are in. Money is tight and he spends it all on getting high and does not refrain from physically and emotionally abusing me over it. He has choked me to the point where I started to feel that im passing out and pushing and shoving is very common. I never thought this could happen as he was the sweetest person i ever knew and I knew him since we were both 16 yrs old and got married at 25. At this point, I don't know what to do as he threatens to leave and divorce almost every day. and today as soon as i Got home from work he pushed me off the chair, started throwing stuff around and started cursing at me and telling me he will kill me. He asked to transfer his half of the rent that he paid at the beginning of the month into his account and that he will leave tomorrow and go to a nearby city where he has some family members. I've never asked for help on a public forum but I really dont know what to do? I recently got into a graduate program at the local university and i start classes in september. I don't want this bad relationship to ruin my whole life. I wanto to be able to atleast work, study and move on even if this relationship wont work. I need you guys to share if there are any options out othere for people like me to still continue their naturalization process. Thank you

salaam,

Yes you can move with the process on your own. First thing you need to do is get away from. He is a coward who doesn't have any control outside of his house so he just comes home and abuse you. Gather as much evidence as you can about his bad character as this will help you in your future process. People on this forum are very helpful & I am sure you will get all the step by step help you need. First thing is to get away from him, you don't need to be with him. while doing that, gather as much evidence as you can such as marijuana used, him abusing you physically, emotionally or with bad mouth. Be careful while doing all this.

Take Care

Posted

salaam,

Yes you can move with the process on your own. First thing you need to do is get away from. He is a coward who doesn't have any control outside of his house so he just comes home and abuse you. Gather as much evidence as you can about his bad character as this will help you in your future process. People on this forum are very helpful & I am sure you will get all the step by step help you need. First thing is to get away from him, you don't need to be with him. while doing that, gather as much evidence as you can such as marijuana used, him abusing you physically, emotionally or with bad mouth. Be careful while doing all this.

Take Care

I know many people on drugs in the USA and treating or acting really bad to their family members. You must have already tried telling him to stop what he is doing..try to involve family from his side and yours if that doesnt works..call 911 next time he abuses you in any way..? have him arrest in detention for a while then you will have a choice of bringing him out as well ..then bail him out and give him RED and final warning to be on the right path if he still continues to abuse "life" you are free to leave him at any point ..i do know personally a similar case like yours..she tried the same thing as i am suggesting and the guy is lot better now..occasionally old drug symptoms does emerge but you can say 90% that guys is now recovered as after arrest they also mandatory prescribed drug classes to him. Wish you all the best ..and be strong

Filed: Other Country: Pakistan
Timeline
Posted

Thank you for your support guys.He says he is moving out today and says its the last i'll see of him. I have a couple of pictures when he tried to choke me and it left some bruise marks on my neck but i dont have any proper evidence of his marijuana use. How would one go about proving proof that he smokes marijuana? i dont know if he's coming back or not. In the past , he's walked out on me many times but would come back looking like a fool. but I'm not sure about this time as he has some family where he is going and they will encourage him to leave me. His medical records do show that he was referred to a psychologist and was taking mood stabilizing drug , resperidone, which he has stopped taking since a year ago. His doctor also did a drug test where it came out positive. But I dont have access to his medical records as they are through the VA. However, i still need to know what i have to do to file on my own. I dont have any police reports as I was always too scared to call the cops because many times he would threaten to kill me and then kill himself. This man is seriously sick. I have no friends and family who would help me or be there for support. I need someone to please help me get information on how i can file for "removal of conditions" on my own. thanks

Love Conquers All...

Posted

Read the I-751 instructions. There is tells you how to remove conditions on your own. You need to show proof of a bona fide marriage and that you entered the marriage in good faith but ended up getting divorced. His pot smoking doesn't matter for this.

AOS for my husband
8/17/10: INTERVIEW DAY (day 123) APPROVED!!

ROC:
5/23/12: Sent out package
2/06/13: APPROVED!

Posted (edited)

First of all, you do not have a temporary green card, you have a conditional green card. You have no need to prove abuse in order to Adjust Status and get a 10 year non-conditional green card. You just need to prove you entered the marriage in good faith. Get your records of the lease you're both on, mingling of finances, your names on bills together, even return addresses on mail showing you both were receiving mail at the same address.

When the divorce is final, or when its time to remove conditions, you file alone with the divorce waiver.

Edited by Caryh

K1 from the Philippines
Arrival : 2011-09-08
Married : 2011-10-15
AOS
Date Card Received : 2012-07-13
EAD
Date Card Received : 2012-02-04

Sent ROC : 4-1-2014
Noa1 : 4-2-2014
Bio Complete : 4-18-2014
Approved : 6-24-2014

N-400 sent 2-13-2016
Bio Complete 3-14-2016
Interview
Oath Taking

Filed: Timeline
Posted

I know many people on drugs in the USA and treating or acting really bad to their family members. You must have already tried telling him to stop what he is doing..try to involve family from his side and yours if that doesnt works..call 911 next time he abuses you in any way..? have him arrest in detention for a while then you will have a choice of bringing him out as well ..then bail him out and give him RED and final warning to be on the right path if he still continues to abuse "life" you are free to leave him at any point ..i do know personally a similar case like yours..she tried the same thing as i am suggesting and the guy is lot better now..occasionally old drug symptoms does emerge but you can say 90% that guys is now recovered as after arrest they also mandatory prescribed drug classes to him. Wish you all the best ..and be strong

There is a reason they give mandatory TRO in these cases. OP's Husband may becoem unhinger and take his violance to a higher level as opposed as seeing tio as a red car.

Advising the OP to use the legal system as a warning is unsound in my opinion.

OP, if you are in danger, call the Police, not to use as punishment but because you're in danger.

Then follow the system, press charges, file for divorce, etc

Worry about immigration last, things will fall into place and your safety and well being is paramount.

Just my opinon. Good luck.

Posted

There is a reason they give mandatory TRO in these cases. OP's Husband may becoem unhinger and take his violance to a higher level as opposed as seeing tio as a red car.

Advising the OP to use the legal system as a warning is unsound in my opinion.

OP, if you are in danger, call the Police, not to use as punishment but because you're in danger.

Then follow the system, press charges, file for divorce, etc

Worry about immigration last, things will fall into place and your safety and well being is paramount.

Just my opinon. Good luck.

things you explained relates not only to marijuana but also leads to seriuos drugs for sure..thing is its lot easier to leave him in this cruel situation he is and get on with your life...but may be God is challenging you to fix him ..in America there are many ways to fix em by law...now have em forcefully taken away by those drug or psychiatric institutions...occasionally visit him to observe changes..i bet he will littereally beg you to have get out but dont be simpathetic..its for his own betterment....after 6 months when he will return back or so then one other thing that will bring change to his life is love and devotion for his religion..is it Islam? where 5 times prayer a day can not only change lives but also do the cleaning process of inner humans..trust me..if you have decided to move on then you do have the right by law ..make your choice..May God be with you..

Filed: Other Country: Pakistan
Timeline
Posted

There is a reason they give mandatory TRO in these cases. OP's Husband may becoem unhinger and take his violance to a higher level as opposed as seeing tio as a red car.

Advising the OP to use the legal system as a warning is unsound in my opinion.

OP, if you are in danger, call the Police, not to use as punishment but because you're in danger.

Then follow the system, press charges, file for divorce, etc

Worry about immigration last, things will fall into place and your safety and well being is paramount.

Just my opinon. Good luck.

You are right. He reacts in a very extreme manner and today when i mentioned the police he twisted my wrist so hard and tried to force me to call them right at that moment. And he said they would never get him alive meaning that he would kill himself. I feel like i'd be in a much bigger mess if something like that happened. Its just so hard to let go of things you patiently waited years for. the idea of having the cops involved, though it might be important, is just so intimidating and sad. i'm just going through so many emotions. but thank you for your support.

Love Conquers All...

Filed: Other Country: Pakistan
Timeline
Posted

First of all, you do not have a temporary green card, you have a conditional green card. You have no need to prove abuse in order to Adjust Status and get a 10 year non-conditional green card. You just need to prove you entered the marriage in good faith. Get your records of the lease you're both on, mingling of finances, your names on bills together, even return addresses on mail showing you both were receiving mail at the same address.

When the divorce is final, or when its time to remove conditions, you file alone with the divorce waiver.

We definitely entered marriage in good faith. and I have the leases with our names, joint bank account, joint tax returns, bills on same address for electric and cable. I dont know if the divorce is going to be finalized by then. Because right now we will be living separate. But i'm relieved to know that i can file on my own.

Can anybody tell me what is VAWA i've seen people mention it in other threads but dont really get what it is besides something related to domestic abuse?

Love Conquers All...

Filed: Other Country: Pakistan
Timeline
Posted

things you explained relates not only to marijuana but also leads to seriuos drugs for sure..thing is its lot easier to leave him in this cruel situation he is and get on with your life...but may be God is challenging you to fix him ..in America there are many ways to fix em by law...now have em forcefully taken away by those drug or psychiatric institutions...occasionally visit him to observe changes..i bet he will littereally beg you to have get out but dont be simpathetic..its for his own betterment....after 6 months when he will return back or so then one other thing that will bring change to his life is love and devotion for his religion..is it Islam? where 5 times prayer a day can not only change lives but also do the cleaning process of inner humans..trust me..if you have decided to move on then you do have the right by law ..make your choice..May God be with you..

You are right. I have thought of it this way and went on being patient hoping he would change for a whole year and a half. (the abusive treatment started very early right after the marriage because he hid alot of things and it had been 2 years since i had last met him in person) so things changed fast for him. He reverted to islam while being in the Army something he choose on his own. We were not together at that time. but he has no interest in learning and practicing Islam he doesn't even go to the mosque or pray and fast. If i try to talk to him about it, thats another argument, "who are you to tell me what i have to do?" so i just let it be on his own terms. But yeah i wish he would seek God's help and mercy. Its just hard to suffer the abuse with someone who needs some kind of intervention and help. That is why I'm not immediately considering divorce, he just left for another city and if we are going to live separate then be it. Even though i dont have my hopes up because the place that he moved back to has all his pothead friends and trashy family members who abuse drugs themselves and will use him again as they have in the past. Please remember me in your prayers as I'm asking God to direct me in what choice I have to make. thank you

Love Conquers All...

Posted

You are right. He reacts in a very extreme manner and today when i mentioned the police he twisted my wrist so hard and tried to force me to call them right at that moment. And he said they would never get him alive meaning that he would kill himself. I feel like i'd be in a much bigger mess if something like that happened. Its just so hard to let go of things you patiently waited years for. the idea of having the cops involved, though it might be important, is just so intimidating and sad. i'm just going through so many emotions. but thank you for your support.

Why did you "mention" the police? It seems like you tried to use it as a threat. When you want to call the police, just call them, don't announce it or "test" the situation to see how he reacts. Newsflash: he won't like it. Just call the police when you feel in danger.

We definitely entered marriage in good faith. and I have the leases with our names, joint bank account, joint tax returns, bills on same address for electric and cable. I dont know if the divorce is going to be finalized by then. Because right now we will be living separate. But i'm relieved to know that i can file on my own.

Can anybody tell me what is VAWA i've seen people mention it in other threads but dont really get what it is besides something related to domestic abuse?

VAWA is for people who don't have Greencards already. You already have a greencard.

AOS for my husband
8/17/10: INTERVIEW DAY (day 123) APPROVED!!

ROC:
5/23/12: Sent out package
2/06/13: APPROVED!

 
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