Treating Foreign Women Like a Commodity

[aaydrian 479]

I think it's funny when they do it.

[SAT 9,609]

hey may be these foreign spouses wanna be treated like commodities and chattel....

[GandD 5,966]

some folk have no other medium for 'getting their views known', alas.

YES! This site has been quite helpful to me. In fact, its pretty much given me the confidence to do the next steps of our journey without a lawyer which is a big thing for my pocket book. Lets try to answer questions (or don't if offended) the best we can.

Oh #######, did I just make my view known? Rats.....

[Darnell 8,478]

hu hu ! See? there are many different views.

Just cause you not commodityzed (sp?) yer bundling companion using the written word is no reason to not seek solace here at visajourney.com

There be many views here, aye?

We've been reminded several times on here by some posters that us CABA (Canadian/American/British/Australian) women are 1980s Dodge minivans, whilst their wives are hot sports cars. Vroom vroom!

My wife resembles a Lotus Elise Mark IV. Sorry for yer plight, that other label must take some getting used to..

[elmcitymaven 9,711]

Actually, I am neither Autobot nor Decepticon. I resemble most a human woman, but I am actually Diabolika, She-Beast of the North. Bask in my radiance!*

*I've been hanging out with my BF too much while he plays the WoWs.

[Darnell 8,478]

Oh Goodness. Golly. Gee, even*.

I feel thankful I missed that generation by a few.

Who 'rolled' yer character for you, and was the name chosen by his krewe, another committee, or from random whilst at a comic book store?

*Radiance is best displayed when the skin is oiled. Just saying. A nice application of oil goes a LONG way for the basking bits.

Edited January 23, 2013 by Darnell

[elmcitymaven 9,711]

Oh Goodness. Golly. Gee, even*.

I feel thankful I missed that generation by a few.

Who 'rolled' yer character for you, and was the name chosen by his krewe, another committee, or from random whilst at a comic book store?

*Radiance is best displayed when the skin is oiled. Just saying. A nice application of oil goes a LONG way for the basking bits.

I have no idea what any of that means, but it's creepy. Ew.

[Darnell 8,478]

Really? Must be a generational thing.. . drats.

[Love's JAA 100]

Oh Goodness. Golly. Gee, even*.

I feel thankful I missed that generation by a few.

Who 'rolled' yer character for you, and was the name chosen by his krewe, another committee, or from random whilst at a comic book store?

*Radiance is best displayed when the skin is oiled. Just saying. A nice application of oil goes a LONG way for the basking bits.

Are you still hanging out in your parents' basement playing D&D?

[Khal_Drogo 50]

Oh, I'm familiar with this all too well. People find out my wife is Bulgarian and they immediately jump to "mail-order bride?" I've been asked by some people why I didn't just go for an American woman since, "it's more convenient."

Most of them who say that I just like looking at and going, "How's that third marriage and three kids at age 24 working out for you?"

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

Oh, I'm familiar with this all too well. People find out my wife is Bulgarian and they immediately jump to "mail-order bride?" I've been asked by some people why I didn't just go for an American woman since, "it's more convenient."

Most of them who say that I just like looking at and going, "How's that third marriage and three kids at age 24 working out for you?"

It is unfortunate that people say that but I think it is because of the other Americans who treat their foreign spouses like something they picked up at Walmart...

*cough* Second marriage at 25, but only one kid (I would have had 5 by now if I could have).

[Dr. Obvious 49]

I think it's funny when they do it.

I do too. The number 1 reason is that a lot of these men have a fundamental misunderstanding/ignorance of their spouse's culture and it comes back to bite them hard, primarily in the bank account. I've been here off and on for nearly 9 years and have seen the complaints and divorces because of these cultural issues time and again. They *think* they know what they are getting when they marry a Thai or Filipina or Russian woman, but the reality is often completely different.

We've been reminded several times on here by some posters that us CABA (Canadian/American/British/Australian) women are 1980s Dodge minivans, whilst their wives are hot sports cars. Vroom vroom!

All in the eye of the beholder, I guess. Check out all the foreign men who married us 1980 Dodge Minivans. ####### is their problem???!

[Caryh 5,206]

I do too. The number 1 reason is that a lot of these men have a fundamental misunderstanding/ignorance of their spouse's culture and it comes back to bite them hard, primarily in the bank account. I've been here off and on for nearly 9 years and have seen the complaints and divorces because of these cultural issues time and again. They *think* they know what they are getting when they marry a Thai or Filipina or Russian woman, but the reality is often completely different.

All in the eye of the beholder, I guess. Check out all the foreign men who married us 1980 Dodge Minivans. ####### is their problem???!

I knew my wife for 8 years before she came here. And yes she's from the Philippines, and I understand the culture very well. But it doesn't mean we don't have issues with it at times. Knowing and being able to deal with it are two different things sometimes. I can't imagine what it would of been like had I not at least been aware of it. But mostly I think its the regular learning to live as a married couple that has been where our disagreements have came up.

As to my previous marriage, of which there was only one, that bit me in the butt financially, but not as badly as my ex had hoped. For some reason she thought she was entitled to all the assets, I should get all the debts, and she thought she should get half my income as alimony for the rest of her life because we were dating while I went to school. I'm glad I live in a state that has very reasonable and non-biased spousal support laws. She still lied and hid some assets during the divorce, but I just wanted to get the dang thing done with. She had dragged it out long enough by not turning over documents that were needed. Funny thing, when she got a bf a few years later, she actually said she was sorry for some of the ####### she pulled, during and after the divorce. I can just assume she suddenly saw how another ex's games were not right. She still pulls some at times, but not as badly and much less often. When our common child hits 18 in a couple years, she'll have nothing to pull games with to.

As to Filipina's I've seen many that assume these are just submissive little housewives all ready to be the perfect spouse. I can say they generally may be non-confrontational, but they are hardly submissive. They may let the man take the lead, but they know perfectly well how to control the reins from behind to keep you on the path they want I wouldn't trade my wife for the world, but it has much more to do with the type of person she is, and how well we match up on our views and values. She will probably always have a few cultural quirks that I'll never really care for, but all the things that are right about us together, more than make up for them.

[aaydrian 479]

I do too. The number 1 reason is that a lot of these men have a fundamental misunderstanding/ignorance of their spouse's culture and it comes back to bite them hard, primarily in the bank account. I've been here off and on for nearly 9 years and have seen the complaints and divorces because of these cultural issues time and again. They *think* they know what they are getting when they marry a Thai or Filipina or Russian woman, but the reality is often completely different.

It's not that they don't understand the culture of FSU women or Asian women, they don't understand women and a lot of times lack intellect & or common sense. Look at this...

As to my previous marriage, of which there was only one, that bit me in the butt financially, but not as badly as my ex had hoped. For some reason she thought she was entitled to all the assets, I should get all the debts, and she thought she should get half my income as alimony for the rest of her life because we were dating while I went to school. I'm glad I live in a state that has very reasonable and non-biased spousal support laws. She still lied and hid some assets during the divorce, but I just wanted to get the dang thing done with. She had dragged it out long enough by not turning over documents that were needed. Funny thing, when she got a bf a few years later, she actually said she was sorry for some of the ####### she pulled, during and after the divorce. I can just assume she suddenly saw how another ex's games were not right. She still pulls some at times, but not as badly and much less often. When our common child hits 18 in a couple years, she'll have nothing to pull games with to.

...That didn't happen because the ex was American, it happened because the laws of America allow for the opportunity. What these sports car owners fail to get is whether their model is eastern European or Asian, once on American soil they will cause as much headaches as these Dodge minivans if they so choose. Yeah a Filipina in the Philippines will likely be the wife you think/society thinks she should be but put her in America where the rules to the game change & can be easily manipulated in her favour and these guys can end up being creamed on the playing field.

PS some of these sports cars are just carts with tricked out wheels, sorry.

Edited January 25, 2013 by aaydrian

[Dr. Obvious 49]

As to Filipina's I've seen many that assume these are just submissive little housewives all ready to be the perfect spouse. I can say they generally may be non-confrontational, but they are hardly submissive. They may let the man take the lead, but they know perfectly well how to control the reins from behind to keep you on the path they want

And those are exactly the kind of men being targeted by this thread. Men who are looking for a submissive, baby popping, barefoot housewife that they can easily manipulate and control. Not every man who marries a woman from Russia or the Far East is a knuckledragger by any means, but those countries undeniably attract the interest of that kind of man, bitter at Western women for whatever reason. Like I said, I've been here for years and know very well that the ultra-submissive stereotypes given to Eastern women very often are not true and I think the wailing disappointment that comes from men expecting a certain type of woman by virtue of her simply being non-Western is amusing.