Usc wife told husband to pack out from the house while husband still ve 2yrs green card at hand

[loveoneanother 0]

Good morning to all my vj family, first of all I want to thank each of every one you guys for all your posts and comments

where I was reading all your immigration experience and difficulties from, I thank God for giving me 2yrs green card for my

journey to start in the state...

This is the problem I ve been having with my usc spouse and I will like anybody that have the experience on how I will treat

this bad moment and move on with my life.

Earlier this year my usc spouse was asking me to raise sum of 5,000 dollars for her that she want to use it for something important,

while she know that husband don't even have social security number, she told me to see if I can borrow money from anybody from my country

living in the state, I told her that I don't used to ask people to give me money and I like to hide myself, my usc spouse's mother is a rich

woman, I told her to go and borrow money from her mother, I knew she will not go or her mother to give her money either, Her mother knows that

she is a drug addicted, my wife uses all the money I manage to raise from people for our rent and bills for drugs, one day I went to my friend

house to visit him while before I left I told my usc spouse that I want to go visit my friend, My wife guessed the time she think I may stay in

my friend's house and she text me on the phone and told me to borrow morning 2000 dollars from that my friend and I text her back why, she replied

me that what do I mean by why, I replied her back that what do she mean by 2000 dollars, she text me that I should come carry my property out of the

that she is packing all my ###### in a gabbage bag, I text her why but she never respond again, in the night around 11 pm the same day, I was in the public

bus coming home becos I never have ssn or driver license to drive, I got a call from her mother that my wife dropped all my stuff in the front of her house,

I mean in the street in her mother's place, I went down from the bus to connect my self to another bus going to her mother, I reached to her mother's house

all my stuff was in the gabbage bag and some of my cloth was outside the bag in the street, even my home theater set and flat screen tv, my laptops and other

things, I went inside to ask her mother to see if she will allow me to keep this in her basement, her mother respond fast that I should be bring them inside

then I never knew that my mother in-law is the one that told my wife to push me, after I finished bringing them inside, it was around 1:20 am, I started talking

her mother that this action her daughter acted is strange to me, I told her mother that where I came in Africa that woman doesn't marry a man no matter what

what condition, I was trying to tell my mother -in law some culture in my country and her mother was saying a different thing then I knew that she was part of

the deal, I ve two blood married cousin living in the same city with, her mother ask me if I ve call my cousin or my mother people in Africa this action, I told

her no, she said I should not tell them, after I went inside the bathroom and called my two cousin sister and let them know what their brother is going through

actually one of the cousin brought me to this country before I met my wife, immediately I called them, one my cousin is at work and other one at home, the one

at home told me that she is coming over to my mother-in law house in a few moment, I told her not to come that my mother in-law will be mad at me, my cousin

reply back she is my cousin that she ve to come so we were dragging it , she said she is the one that invited me to this country and anything that happen to me

she will be responsible when people in Africa ask, immediately I felt that blood relationship, I said aunty do whatever you want to do in a moment she arrived

but she never ask me or my mother-in law any question, she started crying, I started crying too, for over past 25 yrs back I never cried, after the crying my

called outside and told me to hang in my mother in-law's house then she left, I slept there that night, the next day the second cousin came there from her

working place, she came in immediately and ask my mother-in law what brought about this her daughter action, my mother in-law to her there are side of the story

to hear, I told my cousin to tell my mother in-law to arrange a meeting wit five of us, but my mother-in law declined, becos there she knew I will bring up the

the drugs her daughter used to in the house, I left with that my cousin that morning but my property is still in mother's house, five days later I moved back to

my wife house, she started telling me stuff that her mother told to push me out, I kept quite but I gently let my cousins to know.

My wife was doing all sort bad thing in the house, smoking weeds and cigarette in the living and bed room, I told her to be going to the porsh to do that not

inside the house, she always tells that she is the one marrying me sofer america is concern, everyday in the middle of night she will start smoking weed on the

bed while we were sleeping, sometimes after smoking that she will put on the music very loud by 2, 3 am becoas she don't what she is doing then

I used my phone to video her several times when she is molding and smoking the weed in the house, I started videoing her becos I told her I will call police for her and she said that she will denied it, so when she start smoking or rapping the weed, I usually pretend that I am reading news in my phone facing her but she never knewthat she is beind videoded, I had alot video when she was rapping and smoking the weed in the house,

She take my stuff outside the house for several times, I later convince her for our interview which God made his name, I got my 2yrs green card, but the next two weeks she was smoking the weed very wild in the whole house and I told her to take it but she was trying shout on me that she is in charge of everything. she

never knew that I got my 2yrs green card becos I used my po box for my mailing address for my immigration stuff, she told me to give her the keys, and I should

pack all my things and leave her house, I left the house last month and I don't want to go back there again, I was telling some of my friends how will I remove

the conditional green in 2014 without her, some are telling me to use lawyer by then with those video and file for waiver as abuse if she didn't divorce me by

then WHILE other friend were telling to go back and beg my wife to let in again so that she will file for the removal of the conditional green card with me in

2014, the told me those video where she was smoking weed will not help me as prove of abuse during that time, that immigration may deny me for the 10 yrs green card by 2014 with without my wife filing it together with me..Two of my cousin's husband told me not to divorce but I should keep all those video that is a prove

of abuse when filing alone, that I will tell them I was having issue with weed she was smoking in the house and sent me out..

MY QUESTION IS, I am not living her anymore so what will happen if she divorce me before 2014 or if we are still married till 2014 but not living together..

Am I going to have a problem when I want to remove the conditional green card with lawyer by 2014?

Are the going to approve my case with that prove of abuse? Thanks

[BigDaddy28 228]

Good morning to all my vj family, first of all I want to thank each of every one you guys for all your posts and comments

where I was reading all your immigration experience and difficulties from, I thank God for giving me 2yrs green card for my

journey to start in the state...

This is the problem I ve been having with my usc spouse and I will like anybody that have the experience on how I will treat

this bad moment and move on with my life.

Earlier this year my usc spouse was asking me to raise sum of 5,000 dollars for her that she want to use it for something important,

while she know that husband don't even have social security number, she told me to see if I can borrow money from anybody from my country

living in the state, I told her that I don't used to ask people to give me money and I like to hide myself, my usc spouse's mother is a rich

woman, I told her to go and borrow money from her mother, I knew she will not go or her mother to give her money either, Her mother knows that

she is a drug addicted, my wife uses all the money I manage to raise from people for our rent and bills for drugs, one day I went to my friend

house to visit him while before I left I told my usc spouse that I want to go visit my friend, My wife guessed the time she think I may stay in

my friend's house and she text me on the phone and told me to borrow morning 2000 dollars from that my friend and I text her back why, she replied

me that what do I mean by why, I replied her back that what do she mean by 2000 dollars, she text me that I should come carry my property out of the

that she is packing all my ###### in a gabbage bag, I text her why but she never respond again, in the night around 11 pm the same day, I was in the public

bus coming home becos I never have ssn or driver license to drive, I got a call from her mother that my wife dropped all my stuff in the front of her house,

I mean in the street in her mother's place, I went down from the bus to connect my self to another bus going to her mother, I reached to her mother's house

all my stuff was in the gabbage bag and some of my cloth was outside the bag in the street, even my home theater set and flat screen tv, my laptops and other

things, I went inside to ask her mother to see if she will allow me to keep this in her basement, her mother respond fast that I should be bring them inside

then I never knew that my mother in-law is the one that told my wife to push me, after I finished bringing them inside, it was around 1:20 am, I started talking

her mother that this action her daughter acted is strange to me, I told her mother that where I came in Africa that woman doesn't marry a man no matter what

what condition, I was trying to tell my mother -in law some culture in my country and her mother was saying a different thing then I knew that she was part of

the deal, I ve two blood married cousin living in the same city with, her mother ask me if I ve call my cousin or my mother people in Africa this action, I told

her no, she said I should not tell them, after I went inside the bathroom and called my two cousin sister and let them know what their brother is going through

actually one of the cousin brought me to this country before I met my wife, immediately I called them, one my cousin is at work and other one at home, the one

at home told me that she is coming over to my mother-in law house in a few moment, I told her not to come that my mother in-law will be mad at me, my cousin

reply back she is my cousin that she ve to come so we were dragging it , she said she is the one that invited me to this country and anything that happen to me

she will be responsible when people in Africa ask, immediately I felt that blood relationship, I said aunty do whatever you want to do in a moment she arrived

but she never ask me or my mother-in law any question, she started crying, I started crying too, for over past 25 yrs back I never cried, after the crying my

called outside and told me to hang in my mother in-law's house then she left, I slept there that night, the next day the second cousin came there from her

working place, she came in immediately and ask my mother-in law what brought about this her daughter action, my mother in-law to her there are side of the story

to hear, I told my cousin to tell my mother in-law to arrange a meeting wit five of us, but my mother-in law declined, becos there she knew I will bring up the

the drugs her daughter used to in the house, I left with that my cousin that morning but my property is still in mother's house, five days later I moved back to

my wife house, she started telling me stuff that her mother told to push me out, I kept quite but I gently let my cousins to know.

My wife was doing all sort bad thing in the house, smoking weeds and cigarette in the living and bed room, I told her to be going to the porsh to do that not

inside the house, she always tells that she is the one marrying me sofer america is concern, everyday in the middle of night she will start smoking weed on the

bed while we were sleeping, sometimes after smoking that she will put on the music very loud by 2, 3 am becoas she don't what she is doing then

I used my phone to video her several times when she is molding and smoking the weed in the house, I started videoing her becos I told her I will call police for her and she said that she will denied it, so when she start smoking or rapping the weed, I usually pretend that I am reading news in my phone facing her but she never knewthat she is beind videoded, I had alot video when she was rapping and smoking the weed in the house,

She take my stuff outside the house for several times, I later convince her for our interview which God made his name, I got my 2yrs green card, but the next two weeks she was smoking the weed very wild in the whole house and I told her to take it but she was trying shout on me that she is in charge of everything. she

never knew that I got my 2yrs green card becos I used my po box for my mailing address for my immigration stuff, she told me to give her the keys, and I should

pack all my things and leave her house, I left the house last month and I don't want to go back there again, I was telling some of my friends how will I remove

the conditional green in 2014 without her, some are telling me to use lawyer by then with those video and file for waiver as abuse if she didn't divorce me by

then WHILE other friend were telling to go back and beg my wife to let in again so that she will file for the removal of the conditional green card with me in

2014, the told me those video where she was smoking weed will not help me as prove of abuse during that time, that immigration may deny me for the 10 yrs green card by 2014 with without my wife filing it together with me..Two of my cousin's husband told me not to divorce but I should keep all those video that is a prove

of abuse when filing alone, that I will tell them I was having issue with weed she was smoking in the house and sent me out..

MY QUESTION IS, I am not living her anymore so what will happen if she divorce me before 2014 or if we are still married till 2014 but not living together..

Am I going to have a problem when I want to remove the conditional green card with lawyer by 2014?

Are the going to approve my case with that prove of abuse? Thanks

To be honest with you, your case is really complicated. I would tell you go and ask an immigration lawyer about what you are going to have to do. I mean that is clearly abuse and the videos are prooves of that. However the lawyer will tell you what to do in order to show you got married with good intentions but your wife was abusing you. If it's possible keep some billes that they were in both of your names ( electricity, water, lease...) anything that has both of your names. Your lawyer will tell you if it's better to divorce which I am sure he will say yes do it, or he will tell you little bit more. Good luck. If It was me I wouldve been gone the first day. She can't do nothing to you because she is a drug addict. And if you call the police and tell them that she smokes weed and they do tests on her, that will be another proof on her.

[LIFE'SJOURNEY 970]

THERE IS NOTHING COMPLICATED about your case, get a divorce and move on. File for removal of condition after attaining your divorce. There maybe issues since you'll never con-mingle funds but document the behavior of the spouse.

[bobsoni12 0]

Hello my friend my heart goes for you I can understand your feeling coz I was in abusive relationship too. Remember one thing god is still there and good people are still left on our planet. As for your case the best thing will be to contact a good immigration lawer who have experience dealing with i751 waivers, in mean time collect as many proof you have that show ur commingling and you enter marriage on good faith , also try to get lot of notaries letter from friends and family ( specially if someone from your wife's family could testify) also you should see marriage councillor , so you can tell immig that you tried best to save ur marriage, go for counseling with or without your wife. Over the years I have reads people experiences and all these statement were been shared. But I am not any lawyer so make sure to see some good lawyer and get your social security no ASAP

[Treva 3]

Whether you get a divorce or not, please do not move back in with her.

You can still get a 10-year green card, but you may need to have a lawyer to help you. Do you have any US citizen friends that can bear witness, if needed, to these problems that are her fault? Maybe you can get something documented to show you were trying to help her and trying to save the marriage like paying for her drug counseling. It will look so good on you, and if she does not go, everything will look like her fault. Do not pay her thousands of dollars, especially not borrowing from your friends. But you can pay some of the bills even if you are not living there because that is your wife so it will look good on you. For example, pay the electric bill for her every month - don't give her the cash, instead you pay directly to the electric company so you have proof. I'm so sorry this happened to you, but it seems your life will be better living apart from her. I hope you don't have kids together.

[loveoneanother 0]

@ Treva I thank you so much for the advice, No we don't have kid together

[loveoneanother 0]

@ Bobsoni12, I ve gotten my ss no for a long time but I mean that she was asking me to give her 5,000 dollars even those days I don't have ss no,..I have my ss no..Thank you for replying my post

[loveoneanother 0]

THERE IS NOTHING COMPLICATED about your case, get a divorce and move on. File for removal of condition after attaining your divorce. There maybe issues since you'll never con-mingle funds but document the behavior of the spouse.

I have some bill in our both name like we energy,dish Tv and copy of our lease with our marriage photos and family pictures..we don't have bank account together becos when we went to open account together the bank said she can't open account but I can open due to she was owing alot of banks, we can get a joint credit card becos her credit record is messed up and no joint insurance becos her insurance was from state ( Free insurance) so I don't need her insurance before of our interview due to immigration would ve see me as a public charge and result in denying my interview/case...Mind you she was collecting loans from here and there to by weed...Thank you for reading my post

[BigDaddy28 228]

I have some bill in our both name like we energy,dish Tv and copy of our lease with our marriage photos and family pictures..we don't have bank account together becos when we went to open account together the bank said she can't open account but I can open due to she was owing alot of banks, we can get a joint credit card becos her credit record is messed up and no joint insurance becos her insurance was from state ( Free insurance) so I don't need her insurance before of our interview due to immigration would ve see me as a public charge and result in denying my interview/case...Mind you she was collecting loans from here and there to by weed...Thank you for reading my post

I don't know if the bank can give you a letter stating that her credit is not good that is why they didn't approve joint account. Any ways get some affidavits from some friends if possible how she is abusing you if there is any that know about her. Take her to counseling that will show that you care about your marriage. If she doesn't quit, which I won't even wait for it go ahead and divorce her. Than go to a lawyer he will apply for a new green card with waiver right away. He will tell you what you need if any thing else is needed.

[Ryan H 3,812]

Moved from Removing Conditions on Residence Discussion to Effects of Major Family Changes on Immigration Benefits forum; topic is more germane to the latter forum.

[KazuriSana 324]

Something is fishy, somewhere.

You say you don't have an SSN or Driver's License... yet you indicate you have a Green Card. What prevents you from getting these two documents?

You say you are not working, that you raise money for rent and bills from other people... yet you are indicating that you have your own home theater, flat screen tee vee, laptops, et al.

... you must have a lot of gullible friends who are willing to throw away money month in and month out.

By the way, bro, the green card is a work permit, among other things. Go out and look for jobs, from McDonald's to construction to janitor to what-not... and stop sympathy-hunting.

[Sandra G. 5,051]

Well what you described is not mental abuse. Your wife is a drug addict and your married is not working anymore, that's all. You still can file I-751 based in bonafide marriage, divorce and move on.

Do not waste your time filing form I-751 based in mental abuse because the chance to have your case denied is HUGE. In order to have your form I-751 approved based in mental abuse you must prove EXTREME ABUSE against you, and you have to prove the abuse changed many things about your self esteem,your mental state, that because of the changes in your life due the abuse you are suffering depression,anxiety or pos traumatic disorder, you need to have a psychological evaluation stating that as well. You need to prove some of her behaviors such as controlling you, blaming, criticizing you, calling you names,emotionally degrading,humiliating,withholding approval etc.

Edited October 29, 2012 by sandranj

[Ban Hammer 13,403]

one post removed for personal insults, along with one quoting. one post returned below minus the quote and with a portion of the post removed for unwarranted speculation.

People post their life stories on here and expect to get nothing but sympathy. It's a horrible postion you are in OP but everybody is going to have their own opinion on your situation. As stated, you may NOT like what people have to say but you are the one who put yourself on the line with this post. No need to name call.

for all participating in this thread, cease the name calling and bickering and stay on topic.

[Alaska2012 462]

one post removed for personal insults, along with one quoting. one post returned below minus the quote and with a portion of the post removed for unwarranted speculation.

for all participating in this thread, cease the name calling and bickering and stay on topic.

Yes I can see my post was removed, but all I did was question the OP for name calling. I did not call anyone anything! Please read the posts more carefully before removing them.

[Ihavequestions 419]

Stop listening to your friends and family. Their advice is not helping you. Instead, find an attorney and plan to spend a lot of money convincing immigration that you came on a tourist visa, married a US citizen, after the green card arrived (to a post office box, no less) your marriage has fallen to pieces, but, lucky for you, you happen to have friends and family to support you as you pick up the pieces.

You are not being abused. Leave the situation and find an attorney to help you through the divorce and move on.