Is being 'hard headed' a RUB chick trait ?

[Inna & Brian 11]

I think some of this stuff, especially what VV is talking about, aren't RUB traits but individual ones. Choose someone who prioritizes family, the future, etc... you won't run into these problems. Choose someone who prioritizes themselves and instant gratification... well, that's what you get.

I agree with this. I'm not much of a believer in RUB women are this or that. First and foremost they are individuals. Second they are product of their families and third they are impacted by their culture. So yes RUB women tend to dress nicer than Americans, have very sexy accents and a few other superficial traits.

But RUB women are not all sex acrobats, great housekeepers, devoted mothers or like old men. That is just marketing by the dating sites. Nor are RUB women financially desperate, money grubbers looking for a green card.

Look for a woman who shares your values, is compatible and your best friend. Then pray you don't overlook the red flags.

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

What she needed was dielectric grease. It is silicone. All of the car part stores carry them. I have a bottle in my trunk I bought a few weeks back to put on all of my seals but I've been too lazy to do so

I didn't even think of that. I'm going to get some tomorrow. Thanks for the heads up.

I think some of this stuff, especially what VV is talking about, aren't RUB traits but individual ones. Choose someone who prioritizes family, the future, etc... you won't run into these problems. Choose someone who prioritizes themselves and instant gratification... well, that's what you get.

Agreed. Even though a people might have similarities ...language, customs, food, etc.. everyone has a separate individuality. Meeting that someone right is always like rolling dice, and unless someone is a mind reader it's never a sure thing. But there are clue's, hints, whatever to look for before taking that big leap. It's a gamble, that's for sure.

I was raised in the Northeast. We put mink oil on our boots and car seals. I don't know if it was good or not but the doors never stuck

I have a jar of it. Iv'e used Mink oil since I was a kid...baseball gloves, boots, belts, even my wallet. If there's a better product for weather proofing leather not to mention conditioning Iv'e yet to see it. That stuff rocks...Iv'e just never used it on anything other than leather before.

I agree with this. I'm not much of a believer in RUB women are this or that. First and foremost they are individuals. Second they are product of their families and third they are impacted by their culture. So yes RUB women tend to dress nicer than Americans, have very sexy accents and a few other superficial traits.

But RUB women are not all sex acrobats, great housekeepers, devoted mothers or like old men. That is just marketing by the dating sites. Nor are RUB women financially desperate, money grubbers looking for a green card.

Look for a woman who shares your values, is compatible and your best friend. Then pray you don't overlook the red flags.

[TBoneTX 43,059]

Iv'e heard stories about Latin chicks

I get the feeling that most of them are individuals. They can have tempers. Mrs. T-B. informs me that, of the 5 sibling sisters, her temper is probably 4th-worst. Ergothuswithforthly, I got lucky, si man.

The one universal rule (in two parts) of dealing with Latinas is:

1.a. Do not YELL at them, no man; and

1.b. Do not CRITICIZE them, no man.

The first is obvious enough, si man. The next can be described by example: Say that the wife has oversalted your food. Rather than say "You put too much salt on my food," say "Next time, I'd prefer it with less salt."

On the other side is that Latinas tend to come from "machista" cultures, where the men can be as irresponsible and unfaithful as they want, but the women had better not even GLANCE at another guy, or the accusations of cheating come flying -- sometimes accompanied by punishment or physical violence. That's not the only restrictive double standard. The chicks HATE that. Ergothuswithforthly, the universal recommendation is to treat your Latina with consideration and respect, and she'll repay it a thousandfold and be yours for life, si man.

Just don't ever ask her to say "sheet," "beach," or "peace," no man!

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

I think some of this stuff, especially what VV is talking about, aren't RUB traits but individual ones. Choose someone who prioritizes family, the future, etc... you won't run into these problems. Choose someone who prioritizes themselves and instant gratification... well, that's what you get.

Good advice. Seek someone with your same ideas about life and family and be strong enough to pass on the HOT ones that do not. Making compromises with yourself because she has a great @ss will make you happy for a couple weeks.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

I get the feeling that most of them are individuals. They can have tempers. Mrs. T-B. informs me that, of the 5 sibling sisters, her temper is probably 4th-worst. Ergothuswithforthly, I got lucky, si man.

The one universal rule (in two parts) of dealing with Latinas is:

1.a. Do not YELL at them, no man; and

1.b. Do not CRITICIZE them, no man.

The first is obvious enough, si man. The next can be described by example: Say that the wife has oversalted your food. Rather than say "You put too much salt on my food," say "Next time, I'd prefer it with less salt."

On the other side is that Latinas tend to come from "machista" cultures, where the men can be as irresponsible and unfaithful as they want, but the women had better not even GLANCE at another guy, or the accusations of cheating come flying -- sometimes accompanied by punishment or physical violence. That's not the only restrictive double standard. The chicks HATE that. Ergothuswithforthly, the universal recommendation is to treat your Latina with consideration and respect, and she'll repay it a thousandfold and be yours for life, si man.

Just don't ever ask her to say "sheet," "beach," or "peace," no man!

More great advice. Alla says "Treat me as you wife, your daughter and your lover but do not mix them"

[LvivLovers 39]

I'm pretty lucky. My wife normally has a very soft, quiet, calm demeanor...very womanly. Almost never upset.

That said, when she DOES get upset...look out! She is completely replaced by her evil twin. First, her voice intensifies. Then it raises in pitch about 2 octaves. Finally, it takes on this ultra-whiny characteristic that cuts straight to the bone (think angry Sarah Palin up a couple of octaves). She's not actually capable of yelling, but it's still pretty loud.

As to money...no complaints there. Very frugal and very quick with finances. I can talk to her about interest rates, mortgages, taxes, and all sorts of financial concepts and she always gets it right away. She gets why I've bought gold, silver, guns/ammo, food, etc.

Also a very good driver...I was hugely surprised by how quickly she picked it up. No worries at all.

She's also pretty competent about everything and generally fearless...a real go-getter too!

I don't feel like she's the typical RUB...she's more of a unique individual. Definitely lucked out on her.

[visaveteran1 33]

Well then I must be the prize of a lifetime or just lucky. As far as worlds opening up when they are citizens...which worlds? What can they do as citizens they cannot do as permanent residents? Vote? Alla speaks four languages and has 3 masters degrees, what worlds will be opened by citizenship for her? She already has established very impressive credit, owns her own new car even has a fairly successful business, actually VERY successful but only fairly good paying. If she were in a bigger city with more Russian speaking people I am sure she would do even better. She could dump me today and do fine even if she never became a citizen.

Her main motivation for citizenship is so we can go places together and travel without her having to get visas for every country. But for that, I doubt she would bother with citizenship.

Do people break up because they devote themselves to each other? I do not think so. But I can honestly say my wife is exactly what I married, she has not changed a bit in her behavior, nothing was hidden that I can tell.

Does she ever get angry? Yes. She got PO'd today because I cleaned her clock in the standing position in shooting.

My estranged wife talked to a lawyer and his advise was simple...get your citizenship. That is the way to avoid immigration problems or accusations of immigration fraud or other misconduct.

There is a world of difference in being an immigrant "allowed" to live here (subject to the vagaries of immigration laws and other issues which might send them back home) and being a citizen of the USA with all the benefits afforded a citizen. But to cut to the chase, it's a USA passport that allows them access to most of the free world without a hassle. With mobility comes opportunities, like meeting men for marriage. The pool of possible mates expands greatly. And now they are "Americans." Plus, they retain their Russian passport as well. This gives them the freedom to live where they want for as long as they want. No more coming back to the US every 5 months and 29 days.

But these are all reality-based benefits. There are psychological and social benefits...like how others in the society view you. If you want to find a new husband, job, buy a home, it sounds far better to say I'm a citizen than I'm an immigrant. And the treat of being deported ends...so they can tell hubby or ex hubby to stuff it without fear.

In order to get to citizenship quickly, one has to play nice to the spouse to get it in 3 years. Otherwise, it takes 5 years and the spouse or ex spouse could still cause trouble in that regard, especially around "character" issues. Once they have citizenship, they can tell anyone to go fly a kite...especially hubby or ex hubby.

I'm no expert on what happens after the 10-year green card expires...but it would be interesting to know. But I think most LRs get their citizenship before the 10 years are up...or they go back to the motherland.

[visaveteran1 33]

I think some of this stuff, especially what VV is talking about, aren't RUB traits but individual ones. Choose someone who prioritizes family, the future, etc... you won't run into these problems. Choose someone who prioritizes themselves and instant gratification... well, that's what you get.

I did say "any woman" in my comments, so I agree with you to some extent. But I think the magnitude of the effects from the "dark traits" is greater with foreign women...especially ones without great English skills to help soften problems with full discourse. And there are socio-econmic and locale differences within Russia that come into play. My wife grew up in a one-room shack with an outhouse in coolest Siberia. She did not go to a university in Moscow or other big city. She plays the accordion very professionally, but that's the extent of her "refinement." So, if I want to generalize by "type" I'd need to speak about village Russian women or Siberian Russian women...and the one's who lived when there was a USSR.

Choosing a good mate is, of course, critical...but you don't always know what your getting until it's too late. The sexual and honeymoon phase can shield reality for quite awhile...plus the "new puppy" syndrome makes for an interesting period of tolerance and relationship exploration. But all too soon it gets old picking up puppy's #######.

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

The one universal rule (in two parts) of dealing with Latinas is:

1.a. Do not YELL at them, no man; and

1.b. Do not CRITICIZE them, no man.

Same applies to Filipinas. If you yell or start criticizing, then their brain says, "He is mad at me", and the defensive mechanisms kick in. Luckily, an hour or two later she asks, "Are you still mad at me?" If you reply, "No, I am not mad at you," the incident is generally forgotten with a hug and a kiss.

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

Alla is the same but has about 8 credit cards. One VISA card and several store cards, PLUS two debit cards. The stores give her 10% additional discount. She goes there when they are having a 40% off sale, buys something and gets another 10% off. Then comes home and pays it off.

I think that's called the Senior discount.

[visaveteran1 33]

I get the feeling that most of them are individuals. They can have tempers. Mrs. T-B. informs me that, of the 5 sibling sisters, her temper is probably 4th-worst. Ergothuswithforthly, I got lucky, si man.

The one universal rule (in two parts) of dealing with Latinas is:

1.a. Do not YELL at them, no man; and

1.b. Do not CRITICIZE them, no man.

The first is obvious enough, si man. The next can be described by example: Say that the wife has oversalted your food. Rather than say "You put too much salt on my food," say "Next time, I'd prefer it with less salt."

On the other side is that Latinas tend to come from "machista" cultures, where the men can be as irresponsible and unfaithful as they want, but the women had better not even GLANCE at another guy, or the accusations of cheating come flying -- sometimes accompanied by punishment or physical violence. That's not the only restrictive double standard. The chicks HATE that. Ergothuswithforthly, the universal recommendation is to treat your Latina with consideration and respect, and she'll repay it a thousandfold and be yours for life, si man.

Just don't ever ask her to say "sheet," "beach," or "peace," no man!

Talking about "Latinas" is a bigger leap into the abyss of judgment because Mexico is very different than Brazil. Argentina is very European, but Peru is very primitive. What I know of your wife's homeland is once a year they throw water balloons at each other...mucho wet. Pop, bang, splash...si my wet shirt man!

[visaveteran1 33]

Man VV, I don't feel so bad now about the wife screwing up her car over and over after reading a few of your post on here.

Glad I could help you with some perspective and measuring relative misery. You seem to have a much younger wife than me. Maybe we are discussing apples and oranges...but both mixed with some nuts and fruitcake.

Good luck with the Alaskan lifestyle and the wife.

[visaveteran1 33]

I agree with this. I'm not much of a believer in RUB women are this or that. First and foremost they are individuals. Second they are product of their families and third they are impacted by their culture. So yes RUB women tend to dress nicer than Americans, have very sexy accents and a few other superficial traits.

But RUB women are not all sex acrobats, great housekeepers, devoted mothers or like old men. That is just marketing by the dating sites. Nor are RUB women financially desperate, money grubbers looking for a green card.

Look for a woman who shares your values, is compatible and your best friend. Then pray you don't overlook the red flags.

One comment about "individuals." The lingering effects of communism and totalitarianism, which devalued or attempted to eliminate individuality, had to have a profound effect on the society. This was a society of suspicion and fear. Brother would turn in brother to the KGB to please the Party demands. Even with the "new Russia" the younger Russians still had parents from the USSR era. Things good and bad get passed down from parent to child. Russians, as a whole class of people are different, IMO, to people of the western free world. How can it be any other way?

We are married to women from our once greatest enemy...and almost came to nuclear war with. I lived through the Cuban missile crisis. We all hated the Russians. This is the irony of the American/Russian marriage phenomena. We move from hate to attempted love. Results? Mixed.

[TBoneTX 43,059]

Talking about "Latinas" is a bigger leap into the abyss of judgment because Mexico is very different than Brazil.

Oh, absolutely, si man. For example, boyfriends/husbands in Peru, Ecuador, Colombia, & regions of Mexico tend to be machos (exhibiting "machista" behavior as originally explained), while Cubanos and Chilenos generally exhibit less of this.

Argentina is very European, but Peru is very primitive.

Most of the other South Americans whom I've met think that Argentinian Spanish dialect is the funniest, because it sounds like Italian, pizza-i man. On our overnight foray into northern Peru (story posted long ago in other forum), we were fed BURRO meat, gag man.

What I know of your wife's homeland is once a year they throw water balloons at each other...mucho wet. Pop, bang, splash...

I must query Mrs. T-B. about this; if she has mentioned it, I wasn't paying attention, no man.

si my wet shirt man!

Some of those Ecuadorian babes would be of great interest in a wet Si-shirt contest, si man!

"Treat me as your wife, your daughter and your lover but do not mix them"

This must be the reason for my 100% imaginary harem of six blondes, sigh man...

[TBoneTX 43,059]

Same applies to Filipinas. If you yell or start criticizing, then their brain says, "He is mad at me", and the defensive mechanisms kick in.

Tragically (truly so), so many indigenous Ecuatorianas put up with this stuff (plus the infidelity, irresponsibility, failure to lift a finger to help around the house, etc.) because that's all that they KNOW to do because it's been their culture for so long. The stress comes because some of the modern marriageable-aged women are more aware and advanced than the men of their generation are -- dueling expectations, sigh man.

Luckily, an hour or two later she asks, "Are you still mad at me?" If you reply, "No, I am not mad at you," the incident is generally forgotten with a hug and a kiss.

The most beautiful thing on Earth is a woman with a smile on her face, see man.