-sigh- Here We Go - Divorce, Scam, Legal Woes - HELP!

[happyblessedme 12]

sorry to hear this and we will pray for you&your children. others can learn from ur story. not sure why people act the way they do. maybe its culture shock that other people come here&all of a sudden they want it all. I had a friend at some point from the same country that once she saw her friends buying homes all of a sudden the mobile home she shared with her American husband was not good enough. She was talking about vawa&at the same time I did not know until now what vawa was. its almost like this: demand things from him cars, houses, credit cards and force him into debt and when he says no falsely accuse him&file a vawa claim. Hopefully you and your family can heal from this.

There are a lot if not all filipinas who are social climber.Once they meet new friends who are socialite or thave this and that.. she will also want the same.

It is sad but it is really true. I have seen so many filipinas here in GA who are so feeling,,as in very pretentious and social climber.We call it in our dialect "FEELING" as in Feeling RICH and Butiful even the ugly ones.

I still believe in the upbringing of one's self. I been here for almost 5 yrs. now.. I have a goo job working at a hospital..but i am still the same.People from my country would even tease me that i am already here in America and why am i stil the same?? Some filipinas once here already wants to act like an american liberated woman,,even to the point of pretending to be somebody else they're not.

Some think that u shud think and act like u are in america and by going to clubs, getting wasted some are proud of that showing their photos on fb in the clubs.

It is really sad but it is the reality..like i said NOT all but seen so many here.

[-cK- 0]

Yes, she has adjusted status--but it had to go through the court rather than the USCIS due to her deportation proceedings.

Currently, she is awaiting to remove conditions from her conditional status.

I have not reported her to ICE, and I have not pressed charged because my attorney told me specifically NOT to, because it would appear to be retaliation and make me lose my case--although, it feels like I am losing anyway.

If our wise citizens of VJ feel I should pursue that in spite of his advice, I most certainly will.

Thank you for your prayers, Sara.

I am certainly hoping for some solid advice for sure.

Maybe someone else can report her to ICE

[jonnybc 0]

I'm so sorry... while reading your story, i am really mad with your ex wife and to think she is a Filipina, i never thought and i couldn't believed that a filipina can be as bad as her. You picked the wrong Filipina woman. I don't know what to say but i wish and i hope you can get over soon.

[andie_dan 0]

Wow, I cant really believe that there's a Filipina with a behavior like this because I'm also a Filipina. I'm so sorry to hear about your story. You and your children will always be in our prayer. Just keep on praying because our God is always there for us.

[prep.mac 7]

I am sorry, Singed, that you got this type of woman, a shame to my race. However, this is not cultural, this is personal. She has twisted values and priorities. The most that hurt me is the part about the kids. They are innocent...were. We can replace spouses but not our children, own flesh and blood ho did not make the decision for us who to marry next. I pray they would lead a better life ahead with you.

You have made some bad decisions along the way in that relationship. You had a say when it started. You have a say to end it- divorce her and don't sign her ROC.Go to ICE as suggested by more knowledgeable memebers here.Justice must be served.I may not have heard her side of the story but when you said she has harmed your kids..that's just unacceptable. If couples hurt each other, the kids don't have to be.

May you have learned BIG this time and I will keep you and your kids in my prayers.

[griffin 7]

My prayers and thoughts. I just hated that fact that she is a filipina what a shame! anyways, move on and be strong for you and your kids.

[TBoneTX 43,517]

Agreed: Everyone, PLEASE avoid quoting the entire original post in your replies.

OP: As stated by others:

1. File a report with Child Protective Services immediately.

2. Take their written report to your police station.

3. Take their written report(s) to ICE, in person, as Darnell recommended. Also -- and this wasn't suggested previously, that I saw -- report to ICE (with back-up in writing, if you have it) that the attorneys (and judge?) are influencing you to commit immigration fraud by suggesting (ordering?) your filing and paying for the ROC. You can bet your remaining dollars that you'll shoot to the top of the priority list -- first ICE's, and by extension the attorneys' and court's -- when you do this. To end the charade and much of your pain, you must do this.

Performing the actions above should take care of your attorney problems.

Remember that the Federal government has unlimited time and resources to make our lives miserable. You have the rare opportunity to turn this to your advantage. Do the above immediately, and stand back and watch how quickly and completely matters swing in your favor.

[Mochamich 7]

First and far most HIRE a different lawyer who will be working in your and the kids best interest.

Second as someone suggest. stop reading her FB page.

Third, seek the advise of a finance planner, who can help you to get out of some of these finance straits.

Fourth stop believing in that Tampos BS, you have been played.

Fifth, put one foot in front of the other and move forward, there is some sun light at the end of all of this darkness. Just believe it, and the light will start to appear.

Good luck moving forward.

I agree 100%. This lawyer sounds like he's looking to draw out this process milk you for all you've got. He is not looking out for your best interest. Don't give up. Get new counsel, get your fiances in order with a planner, and prepare for a fight.

best of luck

[KayDeeCee 4,892]

Agreed: Everyone, PLEASE avoid quoting the entire original post in your replies.

OP: As stated by others:

1. File a report with Child Protective Services immediately.

2. Take their written report to your police station.

3. Take their written report(s) to ICE, in person, as Darnell recommended. Also -- and this wasn't suggested previously, that I saw -- report to ICE (with back-up in writing, if you have it) that the attorneys (and judge?) are influencing you to commit immigration fraud by suggesting (ordering?) your filing and paying for the ROC. You can bet your remaining dollars that you'll shoot to the top of the priority list -- first ICE's, and by extension the attorneys' and court's -- when you do this. To end the charade and much of your pain, you must do this.

Performing the actions above should take care of your attorney problems.

Remember that the Federal government has unlimited time and resources to make our lives miserable. You have the rare opportunity to turn this to your advantage. Do the above immediately, and stand back and watch how quickly and completely matters swing in your favor.

Oh, this is good. I didn't even think of of all that. I just wondered why she had not filed ROC yet, that her green card must have expired already. Also, how could a court order him to file for and pay for her ROC? It made no sense to me. Of course awarding him to pay $500 a month based on the I-864 to someone that makes double the 125% level made no sense to me either.

OP> Get started on all this first thing Monday morning. You need to stop getting 'walked all over' and begin doing some 'boot stomping' of your own.

[kennym 275]

Agreed: Everyone, PLEASE avoid quoting the entire original post in your replies.

OP: As stated by others:

1. File a report with Child Protective Services immediately.

2. Take their written report to your police station.

3. Take their written report(s) to ICE, in person, as Darnell recommended. Also -- and this wasn't suggested previously, that I saw -- report to ICE (with back-up in writing, if you have it) that the attorneys (and judge?) are influencing you to commit immigration fraud by suggesting (ordering?) your filing and paying for the ROC. You can bet your remaining dollars that you'll shoot to the top of the priority list -- first ICE's, and by extension the attorneys' and court's -- when you do this. To end the charade and much of your pain, you must do this.

Performing the actions above should take care of your attorney problems.

Remember that the Federal government has unlimited time and resources to make our lives miserable. You have the rare opportunity to turn this to your advantage. Do the above immediately, and stand back and watch how quickly and completely matters swing in your favor.

As Always, another Texan with excellent advise...

[TBoneTX 43,517]

As Always, another Texan with excellent advise...

, si man. We might all greatly enjoy the OP's report after he tries it all.

[SuperDuper! 230]

As Always, another Texan with excellent advise...

The TBone always has the common sense response w/ NO bs like so many. No DB VJ weird replies from him, TG.

May the OP find legal response, peace and protection for himself and his minor children.

Edited July 24, 2011 by Boing!

[HotPinay-KoolKano 10]

As Always, another Texan with excellent advise...

my ex works for cps... don't be so quick to rush into that, once you get them involved, they gonna be up in your business for the next 3-5 yrs. The fact that you stood by and allowed it to happen may not bode well.

I have a question for you.... during your courtship & prior to her arrival in the states, were there any, "red flags" that you ignored? Good luck & God bless, you will be okay...

Edited July 24, 2011 by Leo&Rea

[Singed 12]

I just got home after some traveling, and was wonderfully surprised by the amazing responses here.

Both encouragment and advice from everyone, and I appreciate every response.

Tomorrow I will get more time to make a thorough reply to some of the questions and concerns many of you expressed.

Overall, the most asked question I have seen so far I will go ahead and answer.

For clarification, the children did not tell me about the abuse until after they found out my divorce was final. I sat them down and discussed what had taken place, and that it was not their faults, etc. Well, once they realized she was gone permanently, they opened up and started telling me the horrors they had gone through. When I told my attorney, he stated it would seem like retaliation since I would be turning her in after the divorce hearing.

Either way, getting Child Protective Servicves is risky business--I know full well how they engulfed my sister's life some years ago and are still monitoring her.

Personally, though, I have nothing to hide. I think having them involved would be a good safeguarding for my children, and perhaps they could direct me to some beneficial counseling to help me recognize these traps in advance. I definitely plan on investing in the books one poster recommended as well.

I am going forward with the advice of reaching out to ICE and CPS this week, and I am going to give you wonderful VJ family members updates as we go along, and may God help us win this battle ahead.

My only dilemma is the cost involved with hiring a new attorney. I have already spent my money on the current one, so firing him and hiring a new one would be an expense I'm not sure I can conjure. Any advice on how to hire one of these attorney sharks with limited resources?

Some have suggested representing myself, and I am wondering if that is a feasible and good idea? I hear some judges look down on it. I am sure I have the mental capacity to pull it off with proper guidance, but still seems risky.

Anyhow, I promise to answer many of you soon as I have some extra time tomorrow. Thank you SO much for all of these amazing responses.

Edited July 25, 2011 by Singed

[rika60607 215]

Do not flatter yourself, you do not have the mental capacity to represent yourself. Filing paperwork in a simple case is one thing, going through a hostile divorce is another deal entirely.

If you think that your current attorney may be conspiring with the other side - in the long run you'd be making more damage to yourself by keeping him than if you spent more money on a new attorney.

Some lawyers agree to work certain cases pro bono, but I am not sure how you convince them that this should apply to you.

My only dilemma is the cost involved with hiring a new attorney. I have already spent my money on the current one, so firing him and hiring a new one would be an expense I'm not sure I can conjure. Any advice on how to hire one of these attorney sharks with limited resources?

Some have suggested representing myself, and I am wondering if that is a feasible and good idea? I hear some judges look down on it. I am sure I have the mental capacity to pull it off with proper guidance, but still seems risky.

Anyhow, I promise to answer many of you soon as I have some extra time tomorrow. Thank you SO much for all of these amazing responses.