Jerry Springer Interview

[Staashi 371]

Palilover, I'm sorry that this happened to you. If you choose to pursue this with your husband good for you...this would feel like such a betrayal though, especially hearing it from a CO at the US Embassy - I probably would have been there like huh?

my thoughts to you is to seek a little advice from Diadromous Mermaid aka Diaddie...she has oodles of legal experience and she might be able to give you some insight as to how this might play out with the USE and CIS.

I'm glad that the USE seems to have given you some hope that they will approve his visa if you submit the right documents, but, if I was you, I would read a thread by Omoba, whose husband was denied by CO in Sierra Leone, because his birthdate and maybe name - something trivial (can't recall completely) were incorrect on the application - they went through two interviews and were still denied. Look up her topics and you can read all about it.

I will say that this can be very, very difficult for the two of you. Committing fraud on an application, even though you didn't do it knowingly, is a major case for denial. This all goes back to that idea of "how well do you know your fiance/spouse". To the CIS, shame about one's past is not a justifiable reason to not disclose. Furthermore, he will be required in the future to put ex-spouses and all children on all USCIS documents, so to start out this way is not good.

I hope that you all can work through this. It is very big of you to forgive him, but I'm not so sure that the USE will see fit to accept this type of behavior from someone who is petioning to come to US.

One other thing, I know that you were upset by what the CO told you about your rights as an American...but remember this, they did that for your own protection, because other women have been in your situation and weren't as lucky. They just wanted to let you know that they were concerned for your safety and welfare, and that they would handle any situation that you might encounter. Furthermore, you're lucky that you weren't arrested while you were there. Because battery, even if it is your husband and under such terrible circumstances is still punishable...so you might have really been in a situation where you would totally need the USE to get you out of jail.

[DARUMA07 25]

I can understand why you are upset, but why the violence toward your husband?? That is not good in any relationship, no matter who the aggressor is..........

no kidding.

and it's depressing that yours is the only response so far to even acknowledge this. would that be the case if gender were reversed here-if a man found out his wife had been divorced another time and had 3 more kids than originally thought, would anyone still be supportive of the guy if he'd smacked his wife in the face a couple times on the street after he found out?

i hope not, ugh.

Yeah I do agree thre is a double standard. And for the record, I didnt hit him in the face, no way, I'm not that bad!! Well, ironically I am not even violent at all and I never like to even argue with him. But THIS DAY.........

I got lucky I hope. I do believe that my husband acted in ignorance and he got caught up in what he thought was a white lie at the time and it escalated and he did not know how to back out of it. For that, I forgive him because after the interview, he showed proof that he still was genuine.

At least now my husband knows that while I love him with every bit of my heart......don't try to pull a fast one on me like that in the future and expect no backlash. Hopefully we will have no further issues with this in the future.

I wasn't trying to be judgemental in my response.... I was wondering if I or another male would have posted here that we hit our wife, there would have been an outcry and rightfully so. I see this on VJ at times about abuse toward a woman and I agree with all of the responses and advice given to the woman being abused. No one, either female or male deserves to be hit or abused in any way. No one should ever condone that kind of behavior.

Anyway, I sincerely hope you both get these visa problems worked out so you two can be together. Good Luck to you!!

[chiquita 0]

wow what a story.

my best guess is that getting a visa could go either way. at this point retaining an attorney wont help much.

the bottom line is he did lie and the correct info is not on the petition. all you can do is follow up with what the consulate is asking of you and wait for their decision. if your case is returned to USCIS, that is when you will need to consider hiring an attorney who can help you.

i see no need to comment on anything else except the facts as you have stated them regarding the chances of getting a visa.

chi

[LRA 0]

Sorry to read about that. I hope you guys get everything straightened out soon.

[palilover 1]

thanks all for your responses and support. Tonight is a night of I dont know what to describe. Once again, my body just feels like every bone is broken and bleeding. I tried to watch fireworks tonight...I dont know what the occasion is in my town but I went because I heard booms. But no, I was not excited as usaul to see fireworks. I remembered my last night in Amman with habibi......and even though the fireworks here are better than Amman, they still suck cuz habibi is not here with me to see them like he should have been:( After all this, I need a beer in the worst way now.....but I cannot drink cuz I got to get up and work another 12 hour shift tomorrow.

I am getting more pessimistic about this...not agaisnt my husband but about the visa thing. And yes it does make me pessimistic towards my husband too because he caused it yep yep. And he knows it yep yep. But he is starting to show optimism.....but he has not seen bad news like me on immigration because he does not fully understand what he did. He is going to aramex the papers to consulate tomorrow and now he is saying "my brain telsl me teh consulate will accept my paperwork" I laughed when I heard him say this. I was like what brain, your brain is the one that got us into this mess to begin with!!! Maybe he's just trying to cheer me up cuz he hates it that I've been upset since the interview because he thinks it is enough that he's upset over it to.....well....blah....."it's your visa but I can cry if I want to, cry if I want to cry if I want to...you would cry too if it happened to you"....

I hate weekends cuz I can do nothing but worry.....but at least I do not feel like eating and I think that is making me more tired which is a good thing. If I sleep, I dont think (and hopefully I wont have bad dreams)

oh yeah and anotehr thing if his paperwork is sent back to USCIS hellhole, what is a lawyer going to do at that point?? I would think he could do more at the consulate level than if it gets sent back down....

[palilover 1]

and if it is sent back to USCIS, is that going to be the 221G issue that I hear about?

[S and S 12]

I really feel so bad for you. It really must have been a huge shock when you realized he lied to you about such an important thing. You haven't had much time to react and work it out in your head. Then, of course, you love him and miss him so it is like waring emotions. I really wish the best for you. Maybe this was a test for you two. I don't know, but I will keep you in my prayers.

[ak3 0]

Trust is the most important thing in a marriage. I dont know how you can trust him after what he did. I dont think there is any excuse for that in any culture. Criminals get put in jail for things they dont do as well as for ones they do, do. I think I would go on a rampage if that was something my husband did ---I hope your husband starts making it up to you and that he understands how much damage he caused u.

[Ta Ta 1]

I am sorry for what you had to go through.

Try to stay calm until he goes back and the embassy will review the documents. If they will approve the visa in this case I would say they are very lenient.

If he is denied then insist that you see the chief consul to review the decision right there, if he won't overturn it ask for a waiver form for misrepresentation. At that point go to the immigrate2us site and study what is involved in processing the waiver and hardship letter.

Hire the best attorney to guide you through it.

It is expensive and very time consuming to prepare the waiver and can take 6-9 months more or less to find out if it is approved. From what you have said he should definitely qualify for a waiver for misrepresentation if denied.

Best wishes

[palilover 1]

Trust is the most important thing in a marriage. I dont know how you can trust him after what he did. I dont think there is any excuse for that in any culture. Criminals get put in jail for things they dont do as well as for ones they do, do. I think I would go on a rampage if that was something my husband did ---I hope your husband starts making it up to you and that he understands how much damage he caused u.

yeah read the remainder of my original post. He tried the best he could while I was there. The reality is though I do have high expectations of him but they wont be able to be met til we get the visa solved. Either he is alloed to come here and he stands up and gets a job to help out like he should and whatever....which as you can see from my OP taht is what he wanted to do from the beginning but I said no way you're on a visitor's visa and thats how we ended up in green card visa immigration hell:(

The next thing is he is fianlly open to moving to another country and looking for work there and I will follow him if this does not work out here. He wants to be with me no mater where we are. The problem is he's not in an educated field such as medicial or IT or anything. So him getting a job anywhere and getting sponsored is giong to be hard I'm thinking:(

[*JG* 2]

I am so sorry.

I don't condone violence of any kind; but I can't say I wouldn't have done the same.

I hope you make the descions that are right for you. I wish you only the best.

[palilover 1]

I am sorry for what you had to go through.

Try to stay calm until he goes back and the embassy will review the documents. If they will approve the visa in this case I would say they are very lenient.

If he is denied then insist that you see the chief consul to review the decision right there, if he won't overturn it ask for a waiver form for misrepresentation. At that point go to the immigrate2us site and study what is involved in processing the waiver and hardship letter.

Hire the best attorney to guide you through it.

It is expensive and very time consuming to prepare the waiver and can take 6-9 months more or less to find out if it is approved. From what you have said he should definitely qualify for a waiver for misrepresentation if denied.

Best wishes

Thanks for that!! Wow 6-9 months???? And is it going to stay at the consulate this whole time then?

I've decided what I may do is call the consulate directly this wek after they have had time to receive the paperwork. I will request to speak to teh consular officer directly whom I spoke to before. I am going to tell him basically my side of the story and how we ended kup in the immigration process. The bottom lilne is I am just as unhappy with tehm accusing my husband of using me for a green card as my husband is. I want them to KNOW that and know the correct story. As for the misrepresentation, now that I've gotten my husband side of the story...and like I said, I know he is capable of making such a foolish decision.....I am going to explain this to the CO. Since they said they would leave it up to my decision of whetehr I wanted to continue and they'd continue processing...we will see what that givs us.

And what will happen if the CO denies us? Will I get osmething in mail or only my husband? If it's only my husband, that should be very fun with his english him reading an entire denial letter covered in his tears:(

[Staashi 371]

I am sorry for what you had to go through.

Try to stay calm until he goes back and the embassy will review the documents. If they will approve the visa in this case I would say they are very lenient.

If he is denied then insist that you see the chief consul to review the decision right there, if he won't overturn it ask for a waiver form for misrepresentation. At that point go to the immigrate2us site and study what is involved in processing the waiver and hardship letter.

Hire the best attorney to guide you through it.

It is expensive and very time consuming to prepare the waiver and can take 6-9 months more or less to find out if it is approved. From what you have said he should definitely qualify for a waiver for misrepresentation if denied.

Best wishes

Thanks for that!! Wow 6-9 months???? And is it going to stay at the consulate this whole time then?

I've decided what I may do is call the consulate directly this wek after they have had time to receive the paperwork. I will request to speak to teh consular officer directly whom I spoke to before. I am going to tell him basically my side of the story and how we ended kup in the immigration process. The bottom lilne is I am just as unhappy with tehm accusing my husband of using me for a green card as my husband is. I want them to KNOW that and know the correct story. As for the misrepresentation, now that I've gotten my husband side of the story...and like I said, I know he is capable of making such a foolish decision.....I am going to explain this to the CO. Since they said they would leave it up to my decision of whetehr I wanted to continue and they'd continue processing...we will see what that givs us.

And what will happen if the CO denies us? Will I get osmething in mail or only my husband? If it's only my husband, that should be very fun with his english him reading an entire denial letter covered in his tears:(

I wouldn't tell the embassy what your idea was to have him stay...as that would have been illegal. I don't think you would want to bring that up to them as they will look at this with not a particularly good light. You do need to acknowledge that your husband lied to you implicitly...and I don't know how well the embassy is going to look at your case that your husband not only hid a second wife but three children as well and that they were the ones that had to tell you that fact. Furthermore, you can be pissed off that they're accusing your husband of using you for a greencard, and he can say that he is not...but, I will point out that what he didn't disclose to you is very severe...what would you have done if he had been approved and then three years later when you apply for removal of conditions, that they would tell you that he had another wife and three more kids - you'd probably have a heart attack. The embassy did their job...and as much as you might love him, misrepresentation is a pretty big offense.

[samira_07 1]

I am so sorry.

I don't condone violence of any kind; but I can't say I wouldn't have done the same.

I hope you make the descions that are right for you. I wish you only the best.

I too do not condone the violence, but man I can see how someone would loss it. I think you lost it in a nice way for me it might have been worse I am sorry that you had to go though this and I pray for the best outcome for you in this situation.

I am sorry for what you had to go through.

Try to stay calm until he goes back and the embassy will review the documents. If they will approve the visa in this case I would say they are very lenient.

If he is denied then insist that you see the chief consul to review the decision right there, if he won't overturn it ask for a waiver form for misrepresentation. At that point go to the immigrate2us site and study what is involved in processing the waiver and hardship letter.

Hire the best attorney to guide you through it.

It is expensive and very time consuming to prepare the waiver and can take 6-9 months more or less to find out if it is approved. From what you have said he should definitely qualify for a waiver for misrepresentation if denied.

Best wishes

Thanks for that!! Wow 6-9 months???? And is it going to stay at the consulate this whole time then?

I've decided what I may do is call the consulate directly this wek after they have had time to receive the paperwork. I will request to speak to teh consular officer directly whom I spoke to before. I am going to tell him basically my side of the story and how we ended kup in the immigration process. The bottom lilne is I am just as unhappy with tehm accusing my husband of using me for a green card as my husband is. I want them to KNOW that and know the correct story. As for the misrepresentation, now that I've gotten my husband side of the story...and like I said, I know he is capable of making such a foolish decision.....I am going to explain this to the CO. Since they said they would leave it up to my decision of whetehr I wanted to continue and they'd continue processing...we will see what that givs us.

And what will happen if the CO denies us? Will I get osmething in mail or only my husband? If it's only my husband, that should be very fun with his english him reading an entire denial letter covered in his tears:(

I am just amazed how the consulate has been so far, even to accept to continue with the case and say its left in your hands. I wonder if that is the standard or if the CO really wants to help in this situation or not. In either case good luck with the process.

[Dr. A ♥ O 203]

Thx 4 sharing ur story palilover.