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TJandJR

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Posts posted by TJandJR

  1. Very interesting article! It's a shame there are "parents and family" to "rent". No wonder everything is under suspicion. But I'm still unclear about how much money we need to have for the whole process, registry, oath, ceremony, marriage license. I know about the tips and negotiating prices but I need some idea of how much. And Glean we will do everything as proper as we know how to. Thanks.

  2. While I'm waiting to save the money to go back to Lagos to get married (thanks to our k1 denial) I thought of some questions. What are the fees that need to be paid for the filing and marriage ceremony and license and anything else that's required? I'm not talking about the visa fees. I'm asking about the cost of a Nigerian civil wedding.

    I can't tell you how upsetting it is to think I will have to leave and be separated from my husband and still have no guarantee our spousal visa will be approved. But I know a lot of you had to do it.

    Really, at this point I don't even know what I'm suppose to be doing about the k1. VJ family, should I be calling about it? Are they going to tell us why we were denied? And I mean specifically and not some stupid generic "failed to convince the stupid co of bonafide relationship blah blah'.

  3. LOL......the muttering sounds about tree killing remark is hilarious.

    I agree this is indeed so, not just for Nigeria but pretty much all countries.

    USCIS officers make a big sigh having to scan everything into the computer and CO's fuss because

    they have to deal with a mountain of papers.

    When I came with my well stacked evidence to see the CO during a visit while in AP she said to me " I don't have time to read

    all that. What makes you wake up one morning and start collecting all this evidence ?"

    Insinuating that I over compensated for some mysterious reason which kicked in her 007 mode.

    My answer was : " My lawyer advised me to do so and that it was needed."

    However....she also said : " I am not convinced of a bona fide relationship."

    I asked "what else do you want to convince you? "

    She said "I can't tell you that." Oh really ? You want something but can't tell me what.

    Emails, chats, phone logs, wedding rings engraved with our names shown in person with receipt,

    evidence of 3 (at that time) trips, affidavits, gazillion photos,

    loving caring communication and interaction, wedding garments receipt, blah blah blah.....you name it we had it.

    So it is a damned if you do and damned if you don't kind of contradicting mess that is different for

    each and every couple and up to them to pin point what the CO is looking for.

    Even if you really have a very good interactive interview with bright smiles and all and you feel you got this,

    they still want to see flowing evidence of consistent communication when apart.

    My decision is to front load the second time around so I can say : My evidence of bona fide did not get looked at.

    I am front loading it to make sure it will this time around.

    The decision on how much to submit is a decision that can make you go bonkers.

    Currently thinning it out because it looks like a master thesis on Mount Everest.

    How does one shrink a mountain to a sizable-just-right- mole hill !

    How does one please the un -pleasable ?

    Add to that stuff from a 4 year long relationship and you do end up with quite a bit versus a 6-12 months

    relationship. If you omit evidence from a 4 year relationship because it may be too much then they will

    say what happened during the gap ....did you not communicate during that gap because you omitted evidence.

    Lord have mercy !

    Thanks for posting that, with all the aggravation it still made me smile the way the CO presented it.

    I will include a note saying sorry for all the trees that were killed but .......long relationship, refusal, starting over

    and I thought I needed to front load because CO said she was not convinced with our evidence. LOL.

    Very well said. My sentiments also.

  4. His mother and father lived another state. His mom was caring for his dying father at the time. I was terrified of traveling so far because of all the traveler warnings our state dept had on their site. He wanted me to go but I kept telling him it was not safe for me. His sister is in the Nigerian military was not around at that time, his eldest brother lives in Austria with his Nigerian wife and kids. I talk to him about twice a month for 3 years. I have tried talking to his mom but she doesn't speak English and is shy and quickly gave the phone back to Julius. . The co did not ask why I had not met his mom or dad. He did ask questions about my family and Julius answered birthdays, who worked where, what they did on the job, all about my job, my hobbies, what we did while I was there (went to market, cooked together, watched movies, met friends, normal stuff) asked if he worked, what he did at work, if he ever applied for a visa before (no)... Co never looked at his face, never challenged any answer, never kept asking about the same thing, never indicated any problem. Julius was calm coz we knew we were a genuine couple. Did NOT meet and decide to get married right away. We had a slowly evolving normal relationship. So I don't know. But we are going to get married over there now.

  5. I contacted my senator and representative. But we are also planning on a Lagos wedding. Not counting so much on the senator's help. I will have to save money for the trip and I have a new employer but pretty sure I can take off work when the time arrives. We've been in this relationship 3 1/2 years and aren't giving up. I know some people will assume we didn't frontload or that our evidence was shakey or whatever but honestly sometimes I think a denial depends on the co you get. When they say they think the relationship isn't bonafide they should be made to back it up with more specifics. It's just too general. Unless this has happened to you, you may not understand.

  6. Yes but I also think it's dependent on the quality of the front load, not quantity.

    Our CO friend on NL stated that they are looking at one on one interview more than evidence which can be faked.

    TJ&R, how far?

    I'm sorry, how far what? I'm not understanding.
  7. Julius said the co didn't even ask thorough questions. He said he could hear the lady co and she asked very thorough question and he would have preferred het. He said she knew the types of questions to ask to know if a relationship is real. The man did not look at my fiance's face one time during the interview. He looked at his computer and typed through it all. When he told Julius his visa was denied and he was not convinced of a bonafide relationship, Julius asked, what else do you need to see? Perhaps I have it here. The co said you don't have anything I need. This interview is over and then he turned his back on Julius.

  8. I am so sorry. Been there, done that, know how you feel.

    Try to keep it at the embassy a.s.a.p. before they return it and request a second interview via your senator. Very slim chance but worth a try and

    some have been successful at it for another interview. If granted be there.

    Try to find out every little detail of what the CO may not have liked....breathe it, live it, ponder it, get in their head.

    Contact them and see if you can get a response.

    Go over what communication evidence you submitted and how much.

    Marry and file a CR1.

    Life sucks sometimes. Tomorrow will be better http://static-forums.visajourney.com//public/style_emoticons/

    I have searched how to contact Missouri senator. Do I just email him? What do I tell them and how to a get a second interview?

    default/rose.gif

  9. thats so sad, i had my interview yesterday and it went well, am assuming your fiance sat on the same row as i did holding a DHL envelop or a black laptop bag becos we were only 4 K1 applicants at the time and i'm assuming he encountered the difficult CO, who drilled me with about 15 questions without breathing time, interview was done over the phone, he looked at my counternance the whole time to see if i will be get tensed and then he chipped in a question to know if i would agree that my fiance and i did any sort of marriage whether traditional or so, and asked me why not get married in Nigeria?

    Please Be calm and take Mr Gowon's advice to get married and file your I130 its not up to them to determine your happiness in Life.

    Success!

    Yes. That was him. I told him another couple was approved yesterday and he thought he may have been sitting next to you. He was not questioned twice about anything. He said there was no indication by the co that anything was wrong.

  10. Interview was today and I got the news of the denial as I was on my way to work. I haven't even had a proper chance to break down and let my emotions out. This is what I can remember about it before I went numb. He was asked the usual questions...

    who petitioned for you? (me)

    Where does she work and what does she do? he answered correctly.

    has she been married before? yes and he gave the name of my ex and why we divorced

    does she have children? yes. gave names and ages.

    have you met her family? only on the phone and has talked to everyone including my mom many times.

    where did she stay when she visited? I stayed with him at his apartment for over a month.

    has she met your family? yes. his cousin and best friends (photos of all of us) and has talked to his mom on the phone and talks on a regular basis with his eldest brother in Austria over the phone for over 2 years. He approves of us.

    Do you work? he answered yes and told him he's a chemical engineer and where he works.

    I cant remember all the questions but my fiancé said the whole time of the interview the CO kept smiling and nodding his head yes. Then the CO went into a room and came out and handed him his passport back and said denied and gave him that ####### about "bonafide relationship" and said they would be contacting me. My fiancé read me that form that many other people have posted on here about the denial. My fiancé said he asked the CO if there was anything else he needed to see because perhaps he had it in all the evidence he took with him but the CO said "this interview is over".

    Julius and I have been in a relationship since April of 2010. We didn't even file for a K1 until well into our relationship Nov 2012. We are crushed. Im just going to copy past this same post into the review because I don't feel like retyping. Having a broken heart will do that to ya.

  11. I have seen that question in the interview reviews also. I think the answer "that it's a requirement of the k1" is a very good answer. I never thought of that answer lol it's a good one. We've discussed what our answer to that will be. It's a stupid question, but it really has been asked. So has the question why are you marrying an american, why not find a Nigerian wife? Stupid question. No one "plans" to fall in love. It just happens.

  12. Our police clearance was also 5000 and 30 min wait to receive it. But some folks have paid double that amount. And my fiance said Canadians paid less. Maybe the vaccines you need affect the price too. But I agree Gowan, nothing is a fixed price there and that's just the way it is and I'm sure you know that too. It's ashame. But I understand the reasons that create that situation. Don't agree... but understand.

  13. I did mine last month at Children's practice Ikeja, I paid 12k at zenith bank did all my test then paid 8500 there for my vaccination which the doctor gave me copy of my vaccination record that I'll use it in US. And my result I collected it within 2days

    I did mine last month at Children's practice Ikeja, I paid 12k at zenith bank did all my test then paid 8500 there for my vaccination which the doctor gave me copy of my vaccination record that I'll use it in US. And my result I collected it within 2days[/quote

    Yes, 12,000 for the exam and 19,000 for the shots he required. If it was too much, oh well, we got lucky on the police clearance do I guess it all evens out.

  14. I told him to ask for a copy of the DS2035. Seems like I read that somewhere that he needs it in the states for something. But they told him that they don't do that. Anyone know about this? Also... They said to come Thursday to pick up the results. I thought the exam took two days. This is his first day. And for those about to go for the exam, he said there are two doctors and the ones going into one of those rooms are paying 20,000 - 26,000 naira and the ones called into the other room are paying about 31,000 naira. He paid 31,000 and needed shots. Just some info for others who may want to know. But I do want to know about the DS2035 if anyone knows.

  15. I assume your case was complete in August. I am curious if you are asking about the interview because you are waiting for them to schedule it, or if you know you have to go online and schedule it yourself. If I am misunderstanding your question I apologize. Just trying to help.

  16. I can hardly believe this and I don't know why we are just now noticing it, but the passport number is wrong on the appointment confirmation letter. The last passport number is suppose to be a 5 and it has two 5's. I went back and logged in to the visa appointment site to see how it was typed there and I must have typed it wrong because it has two 5's also. I know I must have checked and rechecked it when I did it because that's how I am, and I don't know how I made such a big mistake! headbonk.gif It won't let me update or correct it. I wrote LagosIV and asked if there is any way to get a corrected confirmation letter. What do y'all think will happen? I'm really nervous about it. crying.gif

    Also, about the police clearance, I can't find in the instructions if you take passport photos. I know you take the letter and your passport and a pocketful of money. Anything else?

    Thanks.

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