TJandJR

So happy for you!!! We're going into our fifth year (apart) too and I know what you mean about feeling like an old married couple thanks to immigrations. Best wishes for a long happy life together.

Hi all. Can someone provide me with a legitimate working phone number to the marriage registry in ikoyi? I googled it and got several but they're wrong. My fian'ce is going to register us prior to my arrival and I want to know if he's going to need any documents from me to take with him. And what documents he needs for himself, and how much money he needs at time of registry. Thank you.

And whatever he does don't let anyone know he is married to an American. If he is wearing a ring in fact I would tell him not to wear it. He needs to be safe safe. Nigerian or otherwise its just not a safe place up there.

Some things just aren't worth the risk. I would rather make less and be safe than make more and risk my life and that of my families. Just saying.

Be wise and protect yourselves.You are already at wits end I am sure and your nerves are frayed and to add the constant daily worry and risk of safety in the mix, well God bless you both.

Oh, we aren't married yet. No ring. It's a lil confusing. I don't even know how to update my timeline to reflect which visa we are pursuing. We had our K1 interview and were not approved. We have plans to marry in Nigeria as soon as we can save the money to fly me there and for the wedding and all it entails. Then we will file for the CR1/IR or whatever its called. The spousal visa. (My mind is overloaded right now and I can't remember the proper name of the visa, sorry). I will not go to northern Nigeria for any reason. Thank you for your advice and yes my nerves are frayed. But this is where faith and prayer come in. Afterall, the job posistion IS all we've been praying for except for the locale. God bless you and your pursuits as well.

It just seems like an unnecessary risk considering you guys are in the process.

It's a pretty dangerous place no doubt, just counsel him to be safe and to not take any unnecessary risks. No clubbing, social activities, etc unless required for his job.

Good luck folks.

Thank you Gowan. He said he was going straight to work and straight home when he gets there. He's traveling this weekend I do believe. . He was once in Sokoto for several months and that's how he stayed safe. He won't have time for clubbing... 12 hour days 6 days a week. Whew!

And congrats on lil Gowan!! I'm excited for the both of you...or should I say the three of you.

Why switch job since his looking at migrating....... my friend resigned from his job when he was tranfered from Lagos to the North, Kano and co are like a time bomb and can go off at any time T.

Because jobs are scarce...even for people with degrees. The company he works for now pays poorly and is also not doing very well. He has to work to survive. I'm not going to support him. I'm not able to. And it always looks better to the embassy if we are both employed. Resign? Jobless? Do you know how long many people here have been waiting for their husband's to get approved??? It's a long process. How would he survive? But thank you for taking time to share your input. I appreciate it.

Hello,

I read your post to my husband who is sitting here next to me because he had recently spent a couple weeks in that area. He said from Zaria to Kano...Kaduna , Jos, Bauchi to Maiduguri (hope I spelled all these correct) it is nothing but "dead zone" in his words. He said he's even surprised of someone leaving Lagos to go to Kano for a job opportunity because he said the area is so dry. He said personally he would not feel safe at all ...at all....in any of those areas. Any chance you could meet up in Abuja instead? It's a 5 1/2 hour drive from Kano as opposed to 13 hours to Lagos. I also priced hotels there back in April and although still ridiculously expensive, they seem to be a little cheaper than Lagos.

Anywhere where the majority religion changes in Nigeria is not a place for a non Nigerian to be. Both sides seem to take great joy in settling the score at the cost of innocents. As to his job letting him off. If he is leaving for the US just a little later ( think positive ) the job is really not all that important. Yes it will be a pain to travel back and forth. Is there any way for a proxy to register the wedding for him or could it be done remotely by transferring it from the local one to Lagos ?

That's a great suggestion. I hadn't thought of that. Neither one of us is familiar with the registery and it's rules but we'll definitely find out if we can do it that way. I know his cousin will be more than happy to do that for us if it's possible. Thanks.

Anewday...I appreciate your concern. However I have been in this relationship almost 4 years. And even though I may not have elaborated all the details to you , he has elaborated all the details to me. I have been with him through a previous job change and we discuss the pros and cons and risks and pray and make a decision together as a couple. The current job is not a very good job but better than the last. The new job offer is what we have been praying for... An advanced position with a better company and better pay (although it's still a far cry from what I consider good pay here). I've seen the progression of this job offer from the very first meeting. We are just saddened it is up north. We were initially scared for him to take it and he's angry the prayer for a job like this has been answered but with risks. I said if we believe it is an answer then we must also believe you will be protected. And I'm just wondering (because I'm not from there) how safe it is even for Nigerian citizens. And I'm venting because it delays our plans....and we all know how long this journey is to begin with. Especially after we went the k1 route and are about to embark on the spousal visa. We have saved and had a target date... Now delays.

So, naysayer, please don't assume to know my relationship better than I do, or suggest this is some complicated ploy to get out of our upcoming marriage or a plan to extort money from me or whatever eye opening thing you are eager to suggest. Again, just cause I didn't expound on all the details doesn't mean he hasn't. Frankly, every little detail wasn't anybody's business and didn't need to be told. I'm sorry but I'm just so sick of people quick to imply thetes funny business afoot, or theres a scam going on. Especially since being engaged to a Nigerian I've heard it all. From people that don't know a thing about us. So... Theres not more to this Kano story than I know.... There's more to this Kano story than YOU know and how dare you insult my fiances integrity. Thanks for letting me vent.

Darnell our k1 was denied.

Dwheels not so easy peesy if you're on a budget as tight as ours. Now we have to save money for him to travel back to register, travel back to marry, and for a hotel for a few days. Which is going to delay our plans. If his new job will let him off work twice. But what I really want to know is will HE be safe in Kano?? . (i already know that I shouldn't go there). Thanks again.

I have stayed with him in his apartment in Lagos. But he's moving to Kano, he's not going to have an apartment there anymore.

I have stayed with him in his apartment in Lagos. But he's moving to Kano, he's not going to have an apartment there anymore.

I don't know your financial situation or if he controls your money so I just want to say many counties have shelters for abused women and their children. You might want to look into it in case you need it in the future. Perhaps keep the phone numbers and addresses in your purse. Also there are free hotlines available to call and talk to someone about your situation. You could look them up. Don't let him beat down your self esteem. I hope the best for you.

I received an e-mail alert from the Department of State warning: about travel to Nigeria especially certain states in Nigeria. I'm really saddened by this because my fiance is taking a job in Kono and that was one of the states it warns US citizens to avoid. We're trying to get married in the spring. I guess now we'll have the expense of him traveling to Lagos and us staying in a hotel instead of his Lagos apartment as originally planned. It seems like our wedding plans are getting further and further away and I'm getting depressed. I know that after the wedding we still have a long wait after we file. Anyway, did anyone else get one of these emails I'm signed up for it and I was just curious. I'm also worried for his safety. Anyone here from Kono?

Sorry.... I mean Kano

You have to go to one of the two listed in the packet they send you from the embassy.

Same thing happened to us in Lagos. I just emailed them and explained that short and sweet. They replied and said it was ok. I suggest you do the same. Put your LG case number in the subject line. Include new of beneficiary and us citizen. Best wishes.

Suppose to say *names not *new

I hope everyone can enjoy this holiday season with the people you love and care for. And for those of us still separated, I know it can be a difficult time. I just want to encourage all of us to keep believing and keep hanging in there. I wish everyone everwhere whatever your beliefs peace and love.

Met April 2010. Filed Nov 2012 = 2 year and 7 months. Interview Sep 2013. Denied. "failed to prove bonafide relationship"

I'm sorry. I know exactly how you feel. Lagos is crazy and blind. They make me so angry. Stay in it to win it and best wishes.

Go with God's blessings. Have faith. Best wishes. Looking forward to seeing your post that says praise God, we're approved!

Totally agree. It would make sense to work together. But that would be too sensible for them.

Just curious, when you got the same letter did your case status say card/document production?

Very glad your story has a ended with joy. Best wishes.

yes I know but I got some kind of notice after the denial that other people haven't gotten (some have, some haven't) that suggested our case might be in review. So we've just been curious and watching the developments. Meanwhile we are planning our wedding to file as spouses. But I did some searching here on VJ and there actually have been some k1's reaffirmed in 2012. So I guess it does happen sometimes even if its rare.

Its okay. That's why I was afraid to get excited. But regardless of anything they do now we are still proceeding forward with our plan B. So to find out that they are just playing with our emotions again doesn't surprise me. Thanks for giving it to me straight.

Hi all. I've got an interesting update on our K1 that was sent back for review (or not). I know some of you were keeping an eye on this. I didn't know whether to add it to the thread already started on it or update here. Sorry if I did it wrong. Well today I got an email from USCIS that said there was an update on my case status. It said that they attempted to deliver something to me and it was returned to them by the post office as "undeliverable" and they would keep it for so many days to give me a chance to call USCIS. So I called on my break. It was a miracle but within just 5 minutes I had dialed and was actually talking to someone. He said he could not give out the address in which they had sent it and did not know why it was returned but he could have it resent and have me give him the address it is suppose to be going to. Which I did, of course. I asked him if he knew what it was that they sent. I asked if they were returning my file or requesting additional evidence. He said he did not know what it was they mailed me except it was some sort of document or notice but he was almost certain it was not a request for evidence. He said it was very very possible it was a reaffirmation! He said I should see it as something positive. He told me TWICE that it was possibly a reaffirmation and something positive. He also said it takes 15 to 30 days to remail. I want to be excited but I'm scared to be excited. I'm going to have a talk with my mail carrier too. I've received mail from USCIS before. So what do you think? Opinions or thoughts?

I talked to tier 2 st uscis. Finally!

Am typing fast...on way to work. Excuse typos.

Oxley them know usually k1s expire and are not reviewed or reaffirmed by csc. So why the email? He said they were going to review it and either agree with their original decision or reaffirm. I asked won't it probably expire before the review is done. He said not necessarily and that technically it expired Aug 8. I said yeah but our interview was Sep. He asked if the co gave any indication why it was denied and I said no. He said I need to wait until I hear from them concerning the review.

I will.

But am proceeding with my plans to vist again soon for more face time and marrying and filing again. Now I need to find out why nvc has me in ready status.