Shoot Em Straight

I think you are making an assumption that anyone who is engaged or married to a moslem , are also moslem. Although I know when Ramadan falls for my husband, I didn't know about October Eid until he was here with me. I also spent 5 years in Saudi Arabia in my youth and had many moslem friends and still didn't know. It's the same as my husband not knowing when Christmas falls or Easter. Now that he lives here and goes through the celebration with me he knows as well.

I myself after visiting my husband in the US got Married (and it was not planned) it does happen,but that was after visiting each other quit a bit, and second time i visited him we decided to get Married in the last weeks of my almost 3 month visit because we were already Engaged and that`s also when we found out he would have to convert to Islam if we wanted to get Married in Morocco,I myself i`m not a Muslim so it would be a big lie,so we decided to do it in the US ,but i`m home now doing it the right way filing the I130 so i can live with my Husband again .
Izzy

Nice Idea B.
Well my husband had a little difficult time with the boredom in the very begining. We live in a very suburban area and it is always quiet. Too quiet. He was accustom to walking out to the pace of people on the streets, being with his friends, family, and by his ocean immediatly.
Straight off the slaouia truck... it is a difficult to find a job.
Get footed.....
And accomplish the things you both wish to do right away.
Though we were both happy we were together finally and loved each others company, I wished he could have had a few Moroccan/Arabic speaking folks around here to meet. Still looking.
He missed his food. His missed his FAMILY! He missed the ways he was accustom to. The music. The language.
All these things I could not provide.
We went places locally, visiting different cities around So Cal. This was fun to show him all the things here we take for granted yet are very new and different to fresh eyes. But the travel to here and there was not everyday reality.
At times there were some words of him wanting to go back....then he did.
He had not been in the U.S. a year yet.
I certainly did not want him here unhappy.
Practicality, told me it was way to early to visit but now looking back it was P E R F E C T. After about 2 weeks he was ready to come HOME.
He missed us so much and I assume, saw that though his family n home were familiar to him and still very important, he no longer had the same priorties there.
That was back in Oct 2013.
Now we are in a better state of growth. He is taking advanced level ESL classes in the local college. And will persue his GED. After this...something in the computer field would be up his alley.
Up by 6 45 am. and on the sprinter train by 7 27. Home by 4, simiar to a work schedule which is healthy for a person.
I see a depth of improvement/appreciation with his English and interests of furthering his education... that was not ever planned on when we would talk about him finally being here.
WE assumed he should start working immediatly, to get him acclimated to life here???
But GOD had other plans, and this is where we are at with him.
He does his thing, FISHING, all day on his days off from school. He cooks his tajine when he wants to taste Morocco. And we got a IPTV box that connects off the internet broadcasting Arabic, Turkish, Iranian, Kirdish, Russian, Europrean and of course the main Moroccan channels. BTW if you dont already have this...your husband would love it!!! only 30 a month after you purchase the box. Multiple FUTBOL channels too. but that is for me.
He and my daughter get along very well. She sees a peaceful male figure in the house now. The past expriences were not this way. We all 3 are close and have nice laughs at home. He loves loves my mother and her cooking. She adores his curtious and gentlemanly ways.
I do try to stay in touch with the other ladies that struggled with me on VJ through the wait and maybe one day they will invite my husband and I to there hometown to visit...hint. That would be interesting and I am game.
There are realistic ups and downs like in every Marriage(MENA or not)....he just has a sexier accent than some.
I remain grateful for us being together and not having a horrible story to share.
Now if he will just make that appointment at the DMV.....

Not to make light of the women who have been having terrible experiences with spouses from Morocco. I was curious to hear from others who married men/women from Morocco who have good experiences to share.
Specifically those people who have gone past the removal of conditions/ and or citizenship and are still happily married!
There must be some of you out there willing to chime in and give some positive feedback so that all men from Morocco aren't labeled as men not to be trusted.

being Muslim does not equal AP. Being from a high fraud country makes the chances of AP higher, no matter the religion.

Minus the totally small, irrelevant detail that this woman knew something was up, and took action immediately, as opposed to staying married to the guy for SEVEN YEARS. No one here is defending your ex husband. No one knows him. You brought this whole mess here to talk about, and that's what people have done. In discussing what you've shared, some people have raised other possibilities to explain various behaviors, or what may have happened. That's the thing about marriages in MENA, they're extremely diverse, complicated, and all kinds of things play into why they work or not. But you've done nothing but try to pigeonhole this diverse experience, shared by lots and lots of people here, into whatever defense mechanisms and 'universal truths' about MENA people and marriages your brain has concocted. Punctuated with some feeble explanation about the sociology of MENA people's sex lives and whatnot that borders on being straight up racist. Not everyone here is down with that, regardless of what some Iranians randomly share with you.

Okay, so I am a teacher, and I teach a course on World Religions. Sadly, I am constantly battling the ignorant stereotypes of my students about Islam. As I listen to my students make conclusions that all Muslims are terrorists, I have come to loathe stereotypes in all its forms. My student's conclusions are based on limited information - but to them, their feeling are very real and very valid. They base their stereotypes on what they have heard from others & what they have seen on TV. All they need to do is make connections between Islam and 9/11, and its nearly impossible to convince them otherwise. But they are wrong. And it is my passion as a teacher to broaden their horizons, and clear their minds of ignorance. I start by putting a stop to the sweeping, ignorant stereotypes.
So I apologize if it seems harsh Rosesarered, but I find your comments and stereotypes of Moroccans painfully ignorant. Yes I know you are not stereotyping Islam. But your attempt to stereotype all Moroccan men has a similar effect. You are perpetuating uneducated stereotypes about other cultures. And I do in fact find that, in and of itself, offensive and ignorant. Who are you to make authoritative statements about Moroccan men, just because you used poor judgement when you chose a husband?
It seems that you base your claims on your personal marriage. And yet we have no way of knowing the real reason your marriage ended. You might have been selfish, cold, or stubborn. Who knows? But we do know that you have absolved yourself of ANY responsibility by laying the claim that it was a scam, and that all Moroccan men are most likely scammers. You also make these ignorant claims based on your personal observations of the people who come to this website - As if that is some sort of conclusive study or set of statistics. And yet you have no idea what percentage of people involved in International Moroccan marriages actually come to this website. So your conclusions are totally skewed.
You might feel you are doing good to "warn others" about big bad Moroccan Scamming men. But its a shame you choose to "help others" by stereotyping other human beings, as opposed to, for example, taking personal responsibility for your choice. And although I really do respect the fact that you feel you are trying to help others. Stereotypes never accomplish anything beyond spreading ignorance and hate.

Why why WHY do you continue to think every single new immigrant is part of some scam? Seriously you need to stop! It was her decision to stop the marriage, not him. He gave up everything he knows to come here, and the OP never said a word about any type of abuse on either side. To the OP: you met him once for 8 days, even you said it was like a vacation. Did you think real life was going to be a vacation? The poor guy gave up everything he knows and loves to come here, I'm sure a lot of it is culture shock, being in different surroundings. You have no financial responsibility for him, and he has no legal basis to stay. You say you aren't stupid, but tell me what's smart about bringing someone you met for 8 days to live with you and your small daughters? There needs to be better guidelines for issuing k1 visas, there should be a minimum amount of face to face time required before K1 visas are issued. Casablanca consulate has no rhyme or reason, they deny married couples who have been together years, yet they seem to give out k1 visas like tic tacs.

Well, this is a fun thread! I thought I'd just toss in that as you're reading the I-864 and thinking over the responsibility of bringing someone over, you may need to consider that it trumps your "prenup" idea.

Im sorry to read this

There is information at the bottom of the page on how to report fraud. Do not expect any feed back after you file the report . They may do nothing. Unlike others I am all for reporting non law abiding people as we don't need any more people here that have no respect for the laws.

kayak.com compares a lot of the sites listed above (although you may still need to double-check a few that won't show up through Kayak).

Tired my best to not be stinky & fatigued looking...from the travel, and laboriously pushed my 3 large bags out to the main area of the airport and did not see him.
Tried not to look too lost because there was plenty of "help" just waiting. Walked up and down the airport pushing my cart...wondering why I did not have his cell phone at hand and for a moment realizing I was in a new country, no dirhams and what the heck did I get into. It passed.
Was eyeing a person at the cafe using a laptop (Oh, how fast I could call him through yahoo phone out!) when I turned and spotted an official at the airport.
Flagged him down and asked if there was another arrival area?
He was so so so helpful Welcoming me to Morocco, almost father like letting me know he is there to help and we will find my party.
He sat me down and went to ????
Few minutes later, on my left I seen my future husband quickly walking past my area searching the crowds. He had run from another area to here. I watched him a little more, noted he is tall and loved the way he was looking for something important to him.
Then called his name.
Later he said he will always remember the feeling hearing me say his name at this moment.
It was not the dreamy way one would want to finally meet, hahaha but it is OUR memory.
I am glad you asked and hope you will have a wonderful time in your meeting.

Did I write she was past? If it came off like this...I did not mean it to.
*In fact it was a side point* that we put the limit of childbearing age lower then in the MENA countries. My ex's mother started when she was 14 and only stopped when God willed it!!!!!
(Not with science telling us when we should stop..I am assuming that was where we got the limit after a certain age a woman should stop?????)
@Sivlerberry1331 I was in no way defending scrupulous young MENA men and what you described them doing and why. Nor would I ever liken anybody to the profit Mohammad PBUH.
Believe me...if I knew of what was contributed on here (about the fraud) ahead of my initial K1 Visa, I would never have had the wonderful waiting time I have like this evening for the spousal Visa.
Their age difference just popped into my head romantically...
Relax ladies
I just chose to share what was on my mind and assumed it was a nice thought.
Still do
And when I am pregnant, I will post this too.

Please dont get my humor wrong but this post should now be called
Think Really Hard Before Marrying Someone from MENA...Beauty for Ashes did.
Girlfriend, I am very sorry about your situation but I dont quite understand why you are quoting my entry and then not addressing things I wrote.
I addressed my entry to

Tany because she apologized for her opinion (she is going through personal H E ~double hockey sticks for her Mena man) and she is entitled to voicing her opinion
then to the fact that it was good advice from OP if we take it or not...
Mrs Basta!! Just to let her know I am reading with interest in her input

But I am confused with your quoting????
So this is my input....Sorry OP and thank you for the post. I took it to heart and will watch out!!!
And good luck Beauty for Ashes...you can help people on her with you massive experience.

Dont do that! It was your place, like each one of us here to have a right to voice your opinion. You have been and still are going through enough to have your own opinion.
And I agree with you that it is not just a MENA thing to deceive someone for a green card...but OP posted from her own experience and everyone should take heed just to read and learn.
Whether or not it applies to them exactly or not.
To the poster from Argentina...it is not right to assume women on here or that file for their partners are solely paying for the visa procedure, And no one has "knocked on my door" from America so that is why I found my love born else where.
It asserts the assumption we searched outside of the country because we cant find someone here???
Knowing how important looks are to men in America and more importantly for respect to my husband, I intentionally dont post my photos online but... I assure you if I had a door there would be more than knocking.
I like to think there is goodness in falling in love in unconventional ways. I did not choose him. I only prayed for happiness in life and God answered with this. I love my man and proudly he is a Moroccan.

If people want the father to be there for the birth, then practice safe sex until the immigrant is here with a green card.
There is a reason why the US rejects pregnancies as a reason to expedite. The choice to not practice safe sex does not constitute an emergency for the US to quickly reunite the couple.

So less complicated is what you want.A different opinion from yours is ignorant?
Adults can use condoms, the pill, etc. to prevent pregnancies. Adults should know that not using protection can result in pregnancies. When adults make the choice to engage in unprotected sex, they knowingly risk getting pregnant.
Accidents do happen. However, no one I know have ever accidentally had intercourse. Having sex is a choice with consequences.
Getting pregnant during the immigration process and then lamenting how the immigration process prevents the father from being there at birth is bupkis.

Having a child is a choice and most adults know how not to have a child at a time that is inappropriate. Because you choose to have a child while you are still separated is your decision and you could have waited if being together for the moment was really that important,. ( At least that is what adults should do )

And what happens to the beneficiaries who are denied in the end, beneficiaries who you say will have to return home, who's to say they will actually leave? Who is going to force them to go home? This is setting up a new way for people to stay illegally. And why only people from VWP countries? Not very fair to the couples from other parts of the world.

knowzit,
you and your wife will find this pinned link in the Canada Regional forum of interest to your IR-1 visa petition/application: http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/164618-proving-domicile-when-not-living-in-the-us/
The hardest part of the IR-1/CR-1 process for most Canadian/American couples resident in Canada is proving that the US spouse is domiciled in the US. She/he must submit evidence that proves their residency in the US or proves that they are in the process of re-establishing US residency. Often it means that the couple is separated while the US partner returns to the US and the Canadian partner waits until the visa is approved.
All marriages go through shaky times. If you are separated or know you are separating then it would be fraud to continue on the visa process knowing that you will not be married to your partner in the near future. If you have not decided to separate permanently, then you can continue with the process with the hopes that any differences you have will be resolved by the time the visa is granted.
One thing to remember - it is not easy living in the US as a newcomer. Even if you have a job and source of income right away, you will still find yourself very dependent on your American spouse who, as an American, is granted greater rights and opportunities than you as a non-American are. If your marriage is rocky and falls apart after you do move to the US, you may find that the new life you thought you would enjoy in the US is out of reach. If you think your marriage may not make it, then please consider that you are probably much better off staying in Canada.

Zoletta...pretty name.
Reads like you have been doing this for many years, a professional. And now you have found one.
I have not read much of what hardships you had from the past posts as you mentioned to OP purple23(?) or your history on here BUT
have you EVEN petitioned yet? ... please correct me if I am wrong...you have met face to face? Right?
All this study/advice seems to be a little premature. Come on back in 5-7 years and let us know your findings.
BTW curious to know...on your online International site are there women one can pen pal with to accumilate knowledge on Algerian cultures? Maybe this would be a better way to not run into scammers searching for a visa. oops DOMA.
One thing that you cant gloss over is your healthy young MENA male is most likely giving up ever conceiving children with you. This is a big sacrifice for most MENA men/families....
I do wish you luck with your relationship and hope we hear amazing news from you down the line.
Everyone deserves to be happy.
KAT * Rock on with your new man interest. I hope he is all you need and want.

I just want to mention just in case people may benefit from this is that to me, the worst possible scenario isn't really breaking up-- but rather breaking up and then having to deal with the I864 if the other person turned out to be a giant tool. So for those who haven't really read or understood the I-864, maybe take the time to do so now. Divorce does not negate it. It does not "time out." The beneficiary either works enough qualified quarters (minimum of 10 years iirc) or becomes a USC. Lots of discussion about heartbreak and such, but not a lot of discussion about how when you're in the midst of this, it could also turn out to be a financial disaster that affects you and your family's life for a long, long time.

I really don't think anyone is trying to change your mind. I've read the whole 7 pages over the last couple of days. I don't remember every post, but I didn't notice anyone degrading him either. I think most people were sincerely trying to offer their best advice. I'm going to do my best to offer mine without offending anyone.
The first few replies after your original post offer the most important advice for you at this stage. Slow down. Spend as much time together in person as you possibly can before you file.
Save everything: chat logs, emails, pictures, boarding passes, receipts...the list goes on and on. You can search these forums and find hundreds of threads discussing the evidence people send with their petitions and/or bring to the interview.
Before I answer that, I wanted to say that a denial is not supposed to be based on age difference alone, even though it seems people are denied for that reason often. So, again, take your time. Build a strong case. Don't let them find another reason.
Anyway I don't have numbers for you, but I've heard/read about plenty of approvals for MENA couples with similar age gaps. A few of those couples got through the process without a hiccup. Most of them, however, didn't have it so easy. Some of the couples faced a denial the first time around. Some of them waited two or three years or longer, and dealt with multiple denials. In the end though, they got what they were fighting for. If you search the MENA forum for denials, refusals, 221g's, age gaps, etc you'll find loads of information. I won't tell you it will be fast or easy, but I do think your chances are pretty good if age difference is the only issue.
Like the others have said, if by "happy endings" you mean the visa was issued, then there are plenty.
If you mean still together after citizenship and financial independence, there are some, but not too many. I think some of those ladies already shared their stories with you.
Personally, I don't know any. I've stayed in touch online or in person with some of the couples that went through the immigration process around the same time as I did. They are American women married to Algerians or Moroccans. I could probably remember more, but right now I can think of 12 couples. Of the twelve, five are still married and seven are divorced. In 5 of those couples the woman was ten or more years older. All five of the younger man/ older woman couples are now divorced. All of them say the age difference was not the reason for the divorce. Anyway, those are just the people I know, I'm not implying in any way that those numbers mean a damn thing.
Honestly, I do hope that this man is everything you think he is. I do believe that it's possible for a couple with your age difference to have a successful marriage.
Yes, most Algerian guys are great. They love their country. They don't want to leave their home. But here's the thing...there are tons of Algerian guys online looking for women to marry as a way out of Algeria. They look for Europeans, Americans, Canadians...wherever they think they will be happier, and find more opportunities. They tend to look for older, divorced women who they think will be more financially stable. More desperate for a man. Easier to fool. Most likely to come to Algeria and believe their silly love stories. These guys exist. And they do think like that. And they will tell you anything you want to hear. How on earth can you logically dismiss the possibility that this guy might be one of them? It makes no sense to me at all. You've got all of these little red flags waving at you. Please, don't ignore them. Investigate them first and then hopefully you can dismiss them. Just stop pretending they are not there. He could very well turn out to be everything you think he is, but what if he isn't? People keep telling you "eyes wide open", "blinders off"...and I agree with them. This is not the time to "follow your heart", you've got to let your brain do some of the work here. Be happy, be in love, but don't be a fool.