Nonchalante

Adding GreenEyeZ to CSC
California Service Center (12 applicants)

VJName............Date of I-751....NOA1 Date.....Biometrics.......Approved...
RSTAMARIA2013.......07/03/13.......07/05/13.......08/02/13........--/--/--...
CUTIE BEAR..........07/08/13.......07/09/13.......08/05/13........--/--/--...
NONCHALANTE.........07/09/13.......07/10/13.......08/05/13........--/--/--...
SWAP................07/09/13.......07/11/13.......08/07/13........--/--/--...
DEBZ................07/10/13.......07/12/13.......08/01/13........--/--/--...
CANADIANA013........07/15/13.......07/17/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
KEVDS93.............07/15/13.......07/17/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
I_LOVE_MY_HUBBY.....07/20/13.......07/22/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
STACIE2DAY..........07/22/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...(Divorce waiver)
VAMOIA..............07/24/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
LB & PC.............07/24/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
GREENEYEZ...........07/25/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...

Vermont Service Center (22 applicants)

VJName............Date of I-751....NOA1 Date.....Biometrics.......Approved...
SMATHENA............07/01/13.......07/02/13.......08/06/13........--/--/--...
KLS2010.............07/01/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...(Divorce waiver)
CLAYTLIN............07/05/13.......07/09/13.......08/12/13........--/--/--...
USUXCIS.............07/05/13.......07/09/13.......08/13/13........--/--/--...
NWANYIOMA...........07/08/13.......07/12/13.......08/14/13........--/--/--...
LVRIESLING..........07/08/13.......07/12/13.......08/14/13........--/--/--...
JANINE&SCOTT........07/09/13.......07/12/13.......08/15/13........--/--/--...
BRKLNY..............07/09/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
CANADIA_NYC.........07/10/13.......07/12/13.......08/09/13........--/--/--...
TLJOHNSON...........07/11/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
JOROSSR.............07/11/13.......07/15/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
TEXAS-GAL...........07/16/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
THREEOCEANS.........07/16/13.......07/19/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
SMURFS..............07/17/13.......07/22/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
WELSHBUTTERCUP......07/17/13.......07/19/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
FAITHINGOD..........07/18/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
ZAHIDANTARA.........07/19/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
LIDIA & JB..........07/20/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
IVANTULIER..........07/20/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
CJPITT..............07/22/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
AUDRYNICOLLE........07/23/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
LINNEY..............07/23/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...

IMPORTANT!

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Date of I-751 = The Date you sent your application
NOA Date = The Receipt Date on your original NOA letter
Biometrics = The Date of your biometrics appointment
Approved = The Date your case was approved

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Adding ivantulier to VSC & LB&PC to CSC
California Service Center (11 applicants)

VJName............Date of I-751....NOA1 Date.....Biometrics.......Approved...
RSTAMARIA2013.......07/03/13.......07/05/13.......08/02/13........--/--/--...
CUTIE BEAR..........07/08/13.......07/09/13.......08/05/13........--/--/--...
NONCHALANTE.........07/09/13.......07/10/13.......08/05/13........--/--/--...
SWAP................07/09/13.......07/11/13.......08/07/13........--/--/--...
DEBZ................07/10/13.......07/12/13.......08/01/13........--/--/--...
CANADIANA013........07/15/13.......07/17/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
KEVDS93.............07/15/13.......07/17/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
STACIE2DAY..........07/22/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...(Divorce waiver)
LINNEY..............07/23/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
VAMOIA..............07/24/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
LB & PC.............07/24/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...

Vermont Service Center (20 applicants)

VJName............Date of I-751....NOA1 Date.....Biometrics.......Approved...
SMATHENA............07/01/13.......07/02/13.......08/06/13........--/--/--...
KLS2010.............07/01/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...(Divorce waiver)
CLAYTLIN............07/05/13.......07/09/13.......08/12/13........--/--/--...
USUXCIS.............07/05/13.......07/09/13.......08/13/13........--/--/--...
NWANYIOMA...........07/08/13.......07/12/13.......08/14/13........--/--/--...
LVRIESLING..........07/08/13.......07/12/13.......08/14/13........--/--/--...
JANINE&SCOTT........07/09/13.......07/12/13.......08/15/13........--/--/--...
BRKLNY..............07/09/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
CANADIA_NYC.........07/10/13.......07/12/13.......08/09/13........--/--/--...
TLJOHNSON...........07/11/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
JOROSSR.............07/11/13.......07/15/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
TEXAS-GAL...........07/16/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
SMURFS..............07/17/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
WELSHBUTTERCUP......07/17/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
FAITHINGOD..........07/18/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
ZAHIDANTARA.........07/19/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
LIDIA & JB..........07/20/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
IVANTULIER..........07/20/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
CJPITT..............07/22/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...
AUDRYNICOLLE........07/23/13.......07/--/13.......--/--/13........--/--/--...

IMPORTANT!

* Make sure that your VJ Text Editor setting is set to Rich Text Editor.
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* Please DO NOT change the font, font size, add colors, stuff like that.
* Please PREVIEW before posting to make sure it is properly formatted.
* Please check that you have not deleted anyones NAME & DATA.

Date of I-751 = The Date you sent your application
NOA Date = The Receipt Date on your original NOA letter
Biometrics = The Date of your biometrics appointment
Approved = The Date your case was approved

* Please Capitalize your VJ Name when adding it to the list.
* When you're on this list, please come back to update your information accordingly.
* If you cannot add your information yourself, please ask another VJ member to help you do so.

One check!

Really?
The way you FIRST told the story, your husband was there when everything happened.
Stop using ugly language with people just because you can't keep your story straight.

I do not think it is relevant if he is a member. In fact, I think, it would be useful for him to read this as it may change his prospective and change his behavior and may still save his marriage. Nobody is slamming him. Just merely stating facts and making relevant conclusions. I think this is a time for him to become a man. This is part of getting married: becoming a responsible human being.

I may be a little harsh, but I would like to advice the following:
1) I would like to say I am really sorry that it happened to you and I think this is awful
2) Never live with anyone but your husband! No relatives.
3) Finally, at least judging from what you said: it will not work., The fact that he cannot support his family outside of the house, that he made you live with his parents, and more importantly, the fact that he was not defending you from your in-laws from the very beginning is a VERY BAD SIGN. I know this type of guys: weak, unmanly, children forever, take abuse from their families and everyone else, do not defend their wives and loved ones. These type of guys will never be able to be MEN in the family, will never support or defend their family. The worst part: they never change. The fact that he started defending you ONLY after conversation with you only proves my point. I am sorry that it happened to you but unless you are OK with this and you like this type of guys, RUN AWAY. I know this is bad to give relationship advices but this is true. I am sorry...

Action speaks louder than words that's for sure, especially in a long term relationship. But to establish a relationship, some mutual understanding should be shown, mostly by words, especially when there are two differenct cultures involved. Then, once that is established, saying I love you every 5 minutes, once a day or none at all should depend on their relationship.
I do like to hear my husband say he loves me once in a while, or else it'll feel like being with a roommate with benefit

Good that she does show effection. should be nothing to worry about but to hear ' I love you' once in a while is good for a relationship, especially with different culture where you cant really 'read' the gesture coz of the difference.
One thing to consider, Thais are very much 'service minded' so that should not be confuse with 'love'. I would pour beer/water/offer food to person I just 'know' and they would think I care, but I just did coz that's what I do, gave wrong impression to many though

Pay an attorney to review the contract with only you where you can ask any questions that you want. After that make an informed decision.

Congrats and good luck for both of you

Phil, I really hope you listen to some of the advice in this thread with regard to your future. I'm so happy that you did finally get her out of your life, but really, you need to back off the serious relationships for a while. Please don't rush into anything at all with this ex/re-girlfriend, or anyone else for that matter. You said it yourself, she wasn't good enough for you before and had to be fixed before you would date her again, and even though you said she's done a lot of work towards fixing herself, it says a lot that you continually are attracted to women that need some kind of fixing.
You need to examine if you are now settling for what you before considered damaged goods. When you have been in a bad relationship, a previous not great one will seem a lot better in comparison. Don't drop your standards, and while I feel they're pretty high, if you accept now what you wouldn't accept before, you'll find yourself unhappy once the relief wears off and you no longer need the comfort of an exgirlfriend. They're good for a rebound, but not for long term.
Also, stay away from women from other countries, at least for a good long while. You may find yourself once again making excuses for them based on being from a different culture, when they really just aren't a good match.

This is totally nuts. Completely. I cannot understand why an adult male needs to drag a third person, and another female to boot, into this mess to hide behind. You ought to be ashamed of yourself.
All unnecessary. All you had to do was change the blessed tickets and send her to a hotel. Or go to one yourself.
Take a very close look at your 're' girlfriend. If she agreed to this she's mad.

Why would she do that?
Change the tickets, tell her the date they will be leaving and if she doesn't go, she is out on the streets...her choice.

At this point I think, providing her with a return ticket home is courtesy from your side. If she refuses and starts her overstay, well, good luck to her. She is not your responsibility at this point, basically you could throw her out and that's it.
I know you won't just throw her and the daughter out but IMO it's time for some tough talk from your side so she gets that you are serious with sending her back. Basically, tell her she can do it the easy way or she can have it the hard way, her choice.
If you already have a returnticket booked and you just need to change the date, wouldn't the airline already have the information needed? If it's the returnticket to the ticket she arrived on, that really shouldn't be an issue.
Good luck.

I am sorry but I think you are making excuses. If you really wanted her evaluated, you could have easily turned it around and told her she can either go see a doc or pack her stuff and get the heck out of your house and out of your life.
If you did anything like that, you never mentioned it on here.
Fact is, that whenever someone mentioned a professional evaluation, you came back with something else and at the peak of the discussion, when people were about to just throw in the towel on the topic, you came back with how awesome she is responding to the way you are dealing with her and her attitude, well, BPD symptoms, whatever you wanna call it.
Then your ex-girlfriend comes into play again and out of a sudden your fiancee does a 180 again to the worse and that's it for you.
Sorry, but I am throwing the BS flag!

i doubd you love her. you like her and feel attracted to her sexualy but thats far from love. i scold my fiance without reason whem im annoyed, i reject him when im in a bad mood, if i dont wanna have sex i tell him NO! and he quits. but he never got suspicious on me, he always understood me, and always made things better, he knows the visa process and soon the moving to america has a very big impact on my nerves. my advice: send her back, not because she seems to use u, but because you two dont love eachother

Your employer applied for a visa for you, therefore you need to focus on finding one first.

I cannot believe this thread is still going on...

Wow Phil, you've got yourself in a whole lot of trouble. I think you have terrible judgement, and are not ready for a relationship, with someone healthy or otherwise. Why would you bring someone over from another country to spend your life with if you hadn't already known that they were someone you wanted to marry? Most couples on here already have the wedding date planned when they get off the plane. Yes, you have 90 days to figure it out, and in this case, thank god! Now you just have to figure out how to get her out of the house!
As to the Borderline Personality Disorder, I find it disturbing that you are diagnosing her with this based on this single life changing event. It's possible she has it, or it's just possible that she is just after marriage for other reasons. You don't seem to be able to decide that yourself either, saying that she just wants security for her and her daughter, and now for VAWA. It's even possible that she loved you, and came to be with you only to find herself in a situation different than she had expected and hoped for. I'd love to hear her side of the story, and wonder what diagnoses she could give to you?
This is the diagnostic criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder by the way:
I'm not sure she fits even 3 of these, though it's possible that she was like this before this current situation. If not, she would not be diagnosed with this disorder.
So, let's just say that she doesn't meet the criteria for diagnosis. Let's just say she's a Russian woman who moved her daughter to the US to make a better life for her with her new husband as her father. Or not, let's just say she's a Russian woman who used an American to bring her daughter to the US. The first scenario is out of the question now anyway, even if it was once true for her. The second scenario, if you don't play your part in it, then you're of the hook for it. What's left for you to do is to figure out how to get her out of your home.
Simple solution?
Rent a hotel room and move her and her daughter into it. Pay it till the end of the 90 days. What happens after that is not your concern.
Advice for the future? Don't look to get married, you'll be looking over your shoulder for a while and trying to analyze any future potential mate. You're not a doctor and can't be expected to get it right, so you're probably going to get it wrong, a lot. Might let some good ones slip by that way... Just find someone who you like, and have fun.

I would not even buy a pair of $29.95 jeans without trying them on first. Naturally, when somebody proposes to marry somebody else without ever having even seen them in person, that can't be taken seriously, not even by a Government agency. Marriage is a big step in life; for many it's the biggest decision in their lifetime. When traveling to a store before buying a bicycle to make sure it fits, it's reasonable to travel to the prospective husband or wife at least once before investing time and money on an immigrant petition, if it's a genuine relationship, which is what USCIS is looking for.

People can bang their heads into walls, trying to turn sow's ears into silk purses. If the foundation isn't there, or even molecules thereof, trying to manufacture something is a hurtful waste of time and effort.
It speaks volumes that the OP is psychoanalyzing the woman he purportedly loves, and is assigning psychiatric conditions to her in a public forum.

Phil,
if you two do not get along and you are not happy with each other... Is it important who's fault it is and who might have what sickness and what the reasons are? I did not get impression that you were madly in love with each other ever...
Don't get married. Buy her tickets to get home and make sure you restore everything for her back to pre-Phil days as much as you can. That would be a kind and reasonable thing to do.
Why would you want to get married and continue to hurt each other??? If you don't fit together, then you don't fit together.

Your husband is being a dumbazz.

I would not start accusing people of anything without proof, contact your credit card company as soon as possible, i thought that most had 24/7 service for misuse and lost cards. just get proof first.

The problems now are a direct consequence of what happened before. No relationship ever had a chance to develop. The red flags were whirring in hurricane-force winds very early, and it's no surprise that the situation continues.The last statement in bold type above (from the OP) is the crux of the mistake. She was conflicted or unsure or simply not READY, and the OP was the same, and that was the non-foundation for the state of this non-relationship.
Neither was ready for such a commitment. There was no foundation for a relationship, and unsurprisingly there's no relationship now. There's not a hint of "love" on either side, and in fact they're not even friends. The kindest, most honorable thing to do would be to send her and the daughter back home right away, as highest priority.
If I were to offer advice to the OP after the foreigners have returned home, I'd recommend that he re-examine his motives, motivations, and sense of haste as it applies to entering any relationship, before he enters another.