Woooooo!

[Mr. Big Dog 10,747]

i bet this is quite a popular poster in prison

Meet Mr. Prisonmouth.

[Ric Flair 0]

Fireworks shoot off in all directions, illuminating the packed house in Houston, Texas. The crowd goes into a frenzy as the camera pans over to Jim Ross and the King at the announcing table.

Jim Ross: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Houston, Texas! This crowd is absolutly electric! You can feel the swell of energy in here and it's like nothing I've experienced before. All that excitement might be due to our main event tonight featuring the Nature Boy, Ric Flair in a 4 on 1 handicap match against Mr. Big Dog, charlesandnessa, ionescu and evdogg.

The suspense has been building for days as Ric Flair has taken unprovoked abuse on his thread with accusations of being a loser, g@y prison s*x, and male oral servitude. Well, ladies and gentlemen, quite frankly that was too much to take and Ric Flair challenged them all! In an unfortunate twist of fate for Flair, Vince McMahon stepped in and proclaimed it a handicap match. When Flair challenged them all he wasn't expecting to take them on all at once!

King: Yeah, JR - that's not fair to Flair. Ric has been styling and profiling for years, and I mean years! He has a few wrinkles too many to think he can take on and defeat 4 challengers at the same time! Vince McMahon may have got his wish tonight. This might be the end of Ric Flair's career!

Jim Ross: I've watched Ric Flair throughout the years and I can say this may be his toughest challenge. Ric has seen it all and done it all, but this is just too much. That Vince McMahon is one sorry S.O.B.

Stay tuned, the match is next!

[Ban Hammer 12,842]

The suspense has been building for days as Ric Flair has taken unprovoked abuse on his thread with accusations of being a loser, g@y prison s*x, and male oral servitude.

Ric has seen it all and done it all

i bet he has

[Mr. Big Dog 10,747]

The suspense has been building for days as Ric Flair has taken unprovoked abuse on his thread with accusations of being a loser, g@y prison s*x, and male oral servitude.

Ric has seen it all and done it all

i bet he has

No doubt.

[Ric Flair 0]

As the program resumes, the camera turns it focus to the middle of the ring, where Ric Flair is waiting. Ric is standing firm with a resolute and serious look on his face. Having discarded his usual grand entrance into the ring, Ric had decided to walk that aisle during the commercial break. He is all business tonight. As he walked to the ring, the crowd began to notice and in quite a surprising turn, they booed him like he has never booed before. The level of hatred in Houston, Texas for Ric Flair was unlike anything any wrestler had ever experienced. Ric Flair's mind was elsewhere, walking slowly down that aisle he had walked so many times before. A sense of nostalgia filled Flair, recalling great moments of the past where he defeated the likes of Ricky "the Dragon" Steamboat, Harley Race and Dusty Rhodes. So many years.....so many battles.......the scars, the broken bones, the lost time. As he approached the ring he thought to himself......It was all worth every d@mn minute of it. This was going to be Ric Flair's defining moment. He didn't know if he could win but he knew what he could do.....style, profile and leave it all in the ring. Yes indeed, the Nature Boy Ric Flair was focused. He looked over at JR and King and gave them a slow nod.

The moment was quickly interrupted when a song played that many had not heard in a long time. It was Girls, Girls, Girls by Motley Crue. Certainly an odd song choice. At the top of ramp emerged a group all dressed in the same outfit......leather pants and tight black leather shirts, each sporting a pair of mirror black sunglasses. The four of them began to walk to ringside in unison, single file - apparently led by Mr. Big Dog. The crowd reach a level of volume that would rival any crowd in the history of sports. Houston was undoubtably behind the challengers.

Sensing their sudden popularity, the 4 of them broke formation and began doing air guitar, scissor kicking in the air, holding up their hand displaying the index finger and pinky figer while extending the thumb and headbanging all the way to the ring.

Jim Ross: The challengers are coming to the ring to quite a warm reception. I must admit I'm a little shocked by that.

King: This is the strangest thing I've ever seen JR! And speaking of strange - what's with those outfits?

Ric Flair departs the ring as the challengers approach, unwilling to give them any early advantage. The challengers climb into the ring and ask for a microphone. Mr. Big Dog grabs the mic and holds up his fist to the adoring crowd.

Mr. Big Dog: "Yesssss! We're back!" The crowd goes wild again and Mr. Big Dog points over to Ric Flair. ionescu and charlesandnessa are smirking, while erica is hiding behind them giving Flair dirty looks and yelling "g@y"!

Mr. Big Dog: "Ric.......Flair. Don't think we haven't been waiting oh so long for this. We've been training. Boys - line up." Instantly all four dart into formation standing side by side with arms outstretched...palms down.

Mr. Big Dog: "And release!" In unison, all 4 begin doing squat thrusts, but not any type of squat thrust. They bend down, extending the knees very quickly, staying as straight as they could. As they sat back up, the pace was much different, much slower and they swung their butts out as far as they could and slithered back up to position. They repeated this 10 times, yelling "Release" every time they squatted back down.

King: JR, I feel like I'm watching the Full Monty but I hope this has a different ending.

After the 10th release they formed a circle, curving their torso so that the left shoulder faced in, and after a count of three they did a 4 way high five with their right hand. Quite pleased with themselves, they gave each other hugs, laughed and did another air guitar gesture. Again, the crowd roared. Ionescu grabbed the mic, again directing the attention at Ric Flair.

ionescu: "Take a look at what's going to end your career, Ric." With a glance and a nod to the other three, the tight black t-shirts came ripping off.

ionescu: Oh yeah, I'm manly. I totally am sooooo friggin manly.

charlesandnessa: Yeah, me too. All about the manhood right here. Studly muffin is what I'm called. What's in that muffin I hear? Oh yeah, it's stud.

Mr. Big Dog: "Look at my manly muscles!" he said in a faux deep tone. "But you, Ric Flair are g@y. Oh yeah, super g@y." erica lay back, his? eyes caught Ric Flair's for a second and he dared not move. He remembered the last time he got in the ring with Flair. It was utter humiliation. It took him days to come up with a new word.

Mr. Big Dog: "Flair you are totally g@y. Check this out". Mr. Big Dog pointed up the aisle and a large picture of Flair shone on the jumbo tron of Flair with arms outstretched, saying his patented Woooooo!. The image flashed and 2 words appeared on the screen. It said Prison Mouth. The crowd erupted in laughter. Mr. Big Dog, erica, ionescu and charlesandnessa gave a wink to each other and charlesandnessa said:

charlesandnessa: Quick you guys, another 4-5!. This apparently referred to the high five the four of them performed earlier. With great relish, the four engaged in another 4-5 and the crowd loved it. The challengers had the will of Houston, Texas in their hands. In that moment, Flair grabbed the mic.

Ric Flair: "Is this a kissing contest or a wrestling match?" Outraged, Mr. Big Dog, charlesandnessa, and ionescu chase after Flair. erica stays behind the corner, trembling with fear, but as long as he? has other people on his? side he feels somewhat secure and more brave.

Jim Ross: Well, it's finally started and look at Flair go!

Ric Flair was in the ring swinging wildly. He knew that this could be the last match and he was going to give it everything he had. charleasandnessa was first to receive a chop. The sound echoed and the crowd was silent. charlesandnessa fell to his knees and tears welled up in his eyes. Ionescu jumped on Flair's back when he wasn't looking, which was always a favorite tactic of ionescu.

Flair, having suspected such a weak move, flipped ionescu over his head and down to the mat and delivered a knee drop to the head. Mr. Big Dog launched himself off the top rope for a clothesline, but Flair dodged and Mr. Big Dog hit the mat hard. Flair let out a Wooooooo! and the crowd booed furiously.

Ionescu got up, groggy and Flair delivered another deadly chop. All of the hot air in ionescu's body immediately left him.

King: "Ric Flair is holding his own, this is amazing!" Indeed this was an amazing display. Ric Flair, a true legend in his 50's, had cleared the ring with the much younger challengers. It was a display of sheer guts and courage VJ has rarely seen. Flair indeed takes on all comers. But this would not last. After ten minutes of beatdowns, the strategy of the 4 was becoming clear - since individually they could not take on Ric Flair, it was best if they all ganged up on him and gradually wore him down. Some would call that cowardly and few would disagree.

Cowardly or not, it appeared to be working. Flair was losing his energy and the much younger foes began to take advantage. Flair began to falter and the advantage had shifted. Mr. Big Dog, ionescu, and charlesandnessa began to punch Flair in unison.

Mr. Big Dog: Your chops are g@y Flair!

ionescu: You're so g@y that you are in prison getting g@y man-sex. That's so gross. You're g@y!

charlesandnessa: You're so g@y that everything you say is g@y and it turns g@y things even more g@y. Take that Flair!

erica, now seeing that the attack was on and Flair was losing strength, decided to join in the fight. This is the most common form of attack for someone with no attacking ability. This was his? one moment. Ric Flair was down and erica was going to kick him. A blow was delivered and Ric bent over in pain. erica kicked again and then said that Ric was a stupid loser and never should have beaten him up for talking trash to Flair. It was so wrong of Ric to defend himself that he demanded Flair do something else with his time.

The beatings and ridicule continued. A gash was opened over the head of Flair and blood was all over the ring. Ric could barely keep consiousness. Several times, Mr. Big Dog rolled Flair over to pin him but lifted Flair up before the referee could hit 3. This was all about unprovoked punishment tonight and the crowd was loving it.

To the millions of Flair fans across the country.....all seemed lost.

JR: King, this is disgusting! How much more can Ric Flair take? These guys seem to follow Flair everywhere he goes trying to deliver cheap shot after cheap shot!

King: I think Flair country might have a funeral to attend to tonight. I've never seen Ric take this much punishment.

Just when all hope seemed punched away, Ric Flair gathered the last of his energy....channelling on the victories and glory days of old. If he was going, he was going out with a chop! Mr. Big Dog approached, as cocky as ever. He often acted this way to cover up his own insecurity. About what, it was not known, until.....

And then it happened.......Mr. Big Dog picked up Flair by his now crimson hair and said: "Goodbye prison mouth". As he swung, Flair ducked, turned around and delivered a chop with such a fury and thunder that Mr. Big Dog lost the last part of his name. It seemed Flair had chopped the fakeness right out of him and his entire crew.

Jim Ross: Wow, King - now that was a chop! Mr. Big is staggering backward. He looks different! What's going on?

King: Look at charlesandnessa, ionescu and erica too! They're all changing!

Something strange happened that day......Ric Flair chopped and the disguise went away. Their real identities were revealed. Mr. Big Dog lost the last part of his name and it was clear.

This group of four wasn't what everyone thought! They were the g@yest band of all time - Mr. Big! The disguises came off, and ionescu turned into the bass player, charlesandnessa turned into the lead guitar player, the erica the drummer. Mr Big himself was of course lead vocals!

King: Holy ####### JR, I thought they were gone for good. All we can do is hope they don't start singing!

But it was too late, the crowd roared even louder. Everything is big in Texas so they love Mr. Big. Texas was officially the g@yest place on Earth and they loved it.

Mr. Big, ionescu, erica, and charlesandnessa gathered in a circle, almost in a daze. Their identity revealed, they did what came most naturally.

Still in a circle formation, they dropped their drawers, extended their right hand and grabbed the member of the person next to them with their index finger and thumb and started stroking. The irony of their name became quite clear.

King: Look JR - 4 jerks in a circle. I guess that's why they call it a circle jerk. They moved along in a circle and an audible voice was heard. It was Mr. Big, he was looking at Flair as the group of four moved in a circle. He began singing:

Mr. Big: I'm the one that wants to be with you. Deep inside I hope you feel it too.

erica: Feel it toooo ooooh oooooh.

Mr. Big: Waited at a line in space mountain.....just to be the next to be with you

ionescu: Just to be the next....to......be......with.......you

charlesandnessa: Ooooooohhhhhhh

Now it was all clear. This whole incident about the g@y jokes was really a plea to get onto Space Mountain.

Flair rose to his feet, offered his hand to Mr. Big. A look of sheer joy entered Mr. Big's heart. ionescu, erica and charlesandnessa got so excited that they shot their load and had what appeared to be a seizure on the mat. As Mr. Big went to take Flair's hand, he pulled it back, fixed his hair and kicked Mr. Big in the balls.

Mr. Big doubled over and Ric Flair climbed the top rope and delivered a move that nobody has seen him perform before because it never worked - an atomic knee drop.

Mr. Big was knocked out and Flair went in for the cover.

1.......2..........3

Winner of the match and still champion of the world and VJ - Ric Flair!!!!!!

As the bell rang, and the crappy song died out, the crowd came too as if under a trance. That stupid song had been stuck in their head for years. They looked over at Flair and let out a roar of appreciation. Texas was turned un-g@y by the only force alive possible to accomplish such a feat.....a source of.....nature. Nature Boy Ric Flair! The crowd erupted with a standing ovation, tears in their eyes. They had witnessed an epic, monumental beating the size of which only Texas could appreciate.

Wooooooooo!

[smoke20 0]

gotta give it up for ric. he puts a lot of effort into his post.

[almaty 19]

i agree..ric could be a writer...

[smoke20 0]

wow... that was longer than some books i read..

and no, i am not ric flair, as i have respect for my illinois brother gary, and never believe in insuting anyone behind a fake avatar or alias..

i must admit, i did think it was you almaty till this:

3 User(s) are reading this topic (0 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)

3 Members: smoke20, almaty, Ric Flair

[Ban Hammer 12,842]

wow... that was longer than some books i read..

and no, i am not ric flair, as i have respect for my illinois brother gary, and never believe in insuting anyone behind a fake avatar or alias..

i must admit, i did think it was you almaty till this:

3 User(s) are reading this topic (0 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)

3 Members: smoke20, almaty, Ric Flair

not a big deal, just have two different browser programs on your computer

[eric&gen 0]

Ric gay flair will aways be part of the village people community. lol sing it rich ymca ymca ymca ymca I knowI am gay flair.

wooooooooo

[almaty 19]

wow... that was longer than some books i read..

and no, i am not ric flair, as i have respect for my illinois brother gary, and never believe in insuting anyone behind a fake avatar or alias..

i must admit, i did think it was you almaty till this:

3 User(s) are reading this topic (0 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)

3 Members: smoke20, almaty, Ric Flair

brother smoke, i am usually upfront with the points..and try to be fair..ric picks on too many people i have respect for on this site

[GaryC 7]

I trust brother Dean. If he says he isn't Flair then I believe him.

[Mr. Big Dog 10,747]

I trust brother Dean. If he says he isn't Flair then I believe him.

word

[one...two...tree 2,762]

I trust brother Dean. If he says he isn't Flair then I believe him.

Ric Flair is actually more than one person...the writing styles are different. I believe that mawilson and Number 6 are the dynamic writing duo between the false persona.

Neither of them are around in the Flair threads...

[monnik 0]

gotta give it up for ric. he puts a lot of effort into his post.

Yes- and I enjoyed reading it!