Fiance wants to be OFW.... opinions please

[TShayne 12]

On 12/26/2020 at 12:28 PM, jameyj said:

My fiance now wants to work overseas somewhere like Dubai or Qatar (she has a sister there).  I have been against the idea because as I hear, such arrangements are normally for two years which throws several monkey wrenches into our plans to be together potentially. 

With our NOA2 was Nov. 13. however, and given the backlog at embassies, like Manila where they appear to be 9-10 months behind (and growing) (probably won't see nay real processing util vaccines are widespread and COVID cases are down, it seems unlikely we would get an interview date until 2022.

If so, a two year OFW commitment could probably be completed without too much disruption to the marital plans. Also, I'm starting to feel like she could really learn some things from such an experience that she needs to, both good and bad. 

 

Relevant thoughts, opinions, experiences are welcome.

My wife was working in Kuwait when we met. At that point she had 10 months left in her contract. Her first employer provided no food for her. Her second employer was abusive. So after 4 months she was on her third employer. The basically bought her. Took her passport and she had to serve 2 years with them. They seemed to be an ok couple, but her days were 630am to 10pm or later. One day off a month and in dollars she made 318 dollars a month. I tried to buy out her contract so she can go home and we could plan out our wedding. But no agreement was reached. So, It was also a long wait for her return. But the fact she did not have her passport, she could not leave. So had to wait that out also. Once she returned home to the Philippines, we eventually got married in 2018. The question was brought up what to do while waiting. After discussing to prevent any more problems, I told her to stay home and i would give her what she would have made overseas. I would choose wisely, cuz with uncertainty you could get a letter that your interview is within two months. If she can’t leave a foreign country, then it’s all for not. My wife had her interview in December and just arrived here. It’s a long process but don’t allow her to go too far cuz at some point things will move again and you need her there to be ready.

[Cyberfx1024 7,980]

52 minutes ago, TShayne said:

My wife was working in Kuwait when we met. At that point she had 10 months left in her contract. Her first employer provided no food for her. Her second employer was abusive. So after 4 months she was on her third employer. The basically bought her. Took her passport and she had to serve 2 years with them. They seemed to be an ok couple, but her days were 630am to 10pm or later. One day off a month and in dollars she made 318 dollars a month. I tried to buy out her contract so she can go home and we could plan out our wedding. But no agreement was reached. So, It was also a long wait for her return. But the fact she did not have her passport, she could not leave. So had to wait that out also. Once she returned home to the Philippines, we eventually got married in 2018. The question was brought up what to do while waiting. After discussing to prevent any more problems, I told her to stay home and i would give her what she would have made overseas. I would choose wisely, cuz with uncertainty you could get a letter that your interview is within two months. If she can’t leave a foreign country, then it’s all for not. My wife had her interview in December and just arrived here. It’s a long process but don’t allow her to go too far cuz at some point things will move again and you need her there to be ready.

My asawa was lucky because she worked for a Danish/Faroe Island couple for almost 5 years. They loved her and she loved them very much, by the time she left she was earning almost $900 a month. But my wife's situation was the exception not the rule. She had a batchmate whose situation was like you described not to mention she was always accused of stealing from them, even though she wasn't allowed outside of the house

[Chancy 6,250]

On 12/27/2020 at 4:32 AM, jameyj said:

Those other negative possibilities are pretty bad and I don't want her anywhere near such things...... sometimes people want to try things out for the adventure, no matter what.

 

I agree with what others have said that this is not a good time to work overseas given the COVID situation and the stage you're at in the K1 process.  But if she insists on going and is able to find legal placement through an accredited agency, you can send a case transfer request to the embassy in her work country.  She must have a valid work permit and employers who will accommodate her days off to attend to her visa processing appointments.  Regardless, I think signing up for a 2-year contract would not be prudent given the timing and I hope you can convince her not to do so.

 

Edited December 28, 2020 by Chancy
typo

[Allovertheworld 355]

I wish I could bring a domestic helper to the USA, and only pay them $318 per month, wow that's like a slave or indentured servant

 

No wonder they didn't want to let her out of her contract.

[jskibo 588]

She will also need an employer willing to give her passport back for the interview. I would imagine an employer being quite uncooperative with that as once she has control and the visa in the passport they lose control. 
 

agree with the other posts about she does not get a vote in giving up her passport.  I have covered most of the Middle East as a defense contractor for two decades. Other than myself (as I’m US based) and my field reps that have to travel, all my mechs have had to give up their passport. For US guys it’s pretty easy to get it back for home leave or other reasons but for other third country nationals not as much. 
 

it became problematic in UAE a couple years ago as guys who were short on time would take out large loans from local banks (oddly some banks were very generous with pushing signature loans with zero collateral) and skip out a few months later.   

[jameyj 73]

Lots of good point and comments here so I appreciate the opinions. 

 

My fiance has a BS in IT but has only worked as a admin clerk in her home city of Zamboanga. Her job ended back in Feb 2020 dues to COVID and other circumstances. She has not worked since and I have been supporting her and family. She hasnt really tried getting a job either. She says she want to do office work. I don't think she'd like to be a domestic helper ( and I would Strongly discourage it) and would quickly realize like what a hard job that is even without experiencing unlawful abuses. I already send her more money monthly than she would make as some OFW. 

 

Ultimately, after she is in the US with me, I can easily get her a job at my company in a number of different roles, where even $15-16/hour, she would make more than she ever has before, without the hardships she might endure as an OFW. Part of it is she needs more to occupy her idle time I think but no reason she can't get a job in the mall as a salesperson or even looking for a clerical job somewhere. I am not comfortable with the whole passport thing and life being controlled by a employer who may or may not allow time off for an embassy interview. 

 

I think the best solution is for her to find something locally or even in Manila, get some work experience and keep herself busy. She'll still be close to family/friends, safer and around what she knows........

 

Now with that, what's the best way to get my sweet finance to use common sense? 🙄

[Chancy 6,250]

47 minutes ago, jameyj said:

My fiance has a BS in IT but has only worked as a admin clerk in her home city of Zamboanga.

 

With a degree in IT and admin work experience, she could also try for WFH jobs or freelance work.  I googled "remote jobs Philippines" recently and there seems to be lots of recent job listings, including for data entry specialists or virtual assistants which your fiancee could be qualified for.  Does she have an ok laptop/desktop and stable internet connection at home?

 

[jameyj 73]

1 hour ago, Chancy said:

 

With a degree in IT and admin work experience, she could also try for WFH jobs or freelance work.  I googled "remote jobs Philippines" recently and there seems to be lots of recent job listings, including for data entry specialists or virtual assistants which your fiancee could be qualified for.  Does she have an ok laptop/desktop and stable internet connection at home?

 

She has a decent laptop. Internet is wireless of course and quality can vary, depending on day and times. I'm not sure her household is conducive to a good work environment but she might be able to go to friends place that is quieter and more reliable service. That would be almost list going to an office. 

[Adventine 3,226]

She sounds bored, more than anything else. And with a bachelor's degree in IT, she can certainly do much better with an online job than domestic help.

Edited December 28, 2020 by Adventine

[Adventine 3,226]

^Let me clarify, as I realized my post could come off the wrong way (can't edit my post any more for some reason).

 

Given the fiancée's qualifications (a bachelor's degree), the reality of working in the Middle East, and the need to be available to travel to Manila for the eventual interview, it doesn't seem like an appropriate choice to become an OFW, whether she becomes a domestic helper or takes some other job. 

 

Since OP mentioned the plan is to eventually get her a job at his current company, is there an available role right now, that can be done remotely?

 

 

[aratamorne 165]

My wife is from ZC as well.  They have been on a pretty strict lockdown.  Every time my wife's family thinks they will be easing restrictions, they get new cases.  It is only recently that they started making trips to KCC and such, and then only the young adults, no kids or elderly.  She has probably been bored out of her mind.

 

If she doesn't like Manila, she can also consider Cebu.  A friend of my wife is working there taking help desk calls at a call center.  I also know several people that do work from home IT stuff.  Internet in ZC is reliable, she could get Globe at Home.  That is what my wife and I used and what her family still uses to talk together with Facebook.  

[Allovertheworld 355]

16 hours ago, jameyj said:

 

Now with that, what's the best way to get my sweet finance to use common sense? 🙄

That is a very common problem 

They have what I call Philippines Mentality,  in which they want to listen to others people who have listened or heard something via the grapevine or read online and believe it is truth.

 

I have noticed they have a defeatist  attitude as in "I can't find a job my area" and don't really try or take some type of work way below their skill set and get paid peanuts.

 

Best way to get her to use common sense it once she gets to the USA you can start trying to teach her the American way of working and how we don't take lip from anyone, she has been conditioned to : never talk back to any one who is authority, like an employer, security guard, or someone wearing a uniform.   Here in the USA if your working and your supervisor pops off or act superior then there is a good chance he may get a fist in face and good beat down.  Philippines don't understand that.

 

You will have to teach her common sense once she is her and you can fully explain things to her, and she will actually see what you are saying comes to truth and after a while she will start getting common sense.

[Allovertheworld 355]

11 hours ago, aratamorne said:

If she doesn't like Manila, she can also consider Cebu.  A friend of my wife is working there taking help desk calls at a call center.  

How much does she make after expense per month?

 

What I have found after paying for transportation via Jeepeny/trike and paying for lunch/food each day there daily pay rate is almost nothing. If you add housing they may almost be in a breakeven unless they are living at home.  Bed spacers are probably close to 5000 peso for just meager place to live.

 

If you not making at least 15,000 peso after expenses it may be more than likely not worth working, since you could easily furnish that much while waiting for them get over here.