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Kyleb

future spouse question

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I have a question that concerns me. I am seeing a woman from Columbia and she has 2 children by separate fathers. She is a super sweet woman and is very honest with me. She has never been married before. We have been seeing each other for almost 2 years now. I want to marry this woman but one of my friends brought up a very interesting question. My friend told me his best friend married a woman from Columbia that has a daughter. When they go engaged and filed for a fiancé visa she had to get a paper signed from the ex boyfriend for permission I guess for her to leave the country with their daughter. The boyfriend had nothing to do with the daughter but I guess this is the normal process? Anyways when she met with her ex boyfriend to get this paper signed he said he would sign it but he would need $5000 US dollars to do so. Is this common and has anyone ever been through this? Thank you 

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Unless the mother has sole legal custody of a child you or your spouse are going to have to deal with the father(s).


March 2, 2018  Married In Hong Kong

April 30, 2018  Mary moves from the Philippines to Mexico, Husband has MX Permanent Residency

June 13, 2018 Mary receives Mexican Residency Card

June 15, 2018  I-130 DCF Appointment in Juarez  -  June 18, 2018  Approval E-Mail

August 2, 2018 Case Complete At Consulate

September 25, 2018 Interview in CDJ and Approved!

October 7, 2018 In the USA

October 27, 2018 Green Card received 

October 29, 2018 Applied for Social Security Card - November 5, 2018 Social Security Card received

November 6th, 2018 State ID Card Received, Applied for Global Entry - Feb 8,2019 Approved.

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Posted (edited)
22 minutes ago, Kyleb said:

Anyways when she met with her ex boyfriend to get this paper signed he said he would sign it but he would need $5000 US dollars to do so.

He needs a pen. The $5,000 is for personal use.

 

You will either need the father's permission or a court order for the child to immigrate (Edit: or sole custody, depending on local laws). Local laws apply (i.e. in Philippines a child born out of wedlock is the sole custody of the mother).

Edited by geowrian

Timelines:

Spoiler

AOS (I-485 + I-131 + I-765):

9/25/17: sent forms to Chicago

9/27/17: received by USCIS

10/4/17: NOA1 electronic notification received

10/10/17: NOA1 hard copy received. Social Security card being issued in married name (3rd attempt!)

10/14/17: Biometrics appointment notice received

10/25/17: Biometrics

1/2/18: EAD + AP approved (no website update)

1/5/18: EAD + AP mailed

1/8/18: EAD + AP approval notice hardcopies received

1/10/18: EAD + AP received

9/5/18: Interview scheduled notice

10/17/18: Interview

10/24/18: Green card produced notice

10/25/18: Formal approval

10/31/18: Green card received

 

K-1:

Spoiler

I-129F

12/1/17: sent

12/14/17: NOA1 hard copy received

3/10/17: RFE (IMB verification)

3/22/17: RFE response received

3/24/17: Approved!

3/30/17: NOA2 hard copy received

 

NVC

4/6/2017: Received

4/12/2017: Sent to Riyadh embassy

4/16/2017: Case received at Riyadh embassy

4/21/2017: Request case transfer to Manila, approved 4/24/2017

 

K-1

5/1/2017: Case received by Manila (1 week embassy transfer??? Lucky~)

7/13/2017: Interview: APPROVED!!!

7/19/2017: Visa in hand

8/15/2017: POE

 

 

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Moved from What Visa Do I Need - Family Based Immigration forum to Mexico, Latin & South America regional forum.


Our journey:

Spoiler

September 2007: Met online via social networking site (MySpace); began exchanging messages.
March 26, 2009: We become a couple!
September 10, 2009: Arrived for first meeting in-person!
June 17, 2010: Arrived for second in-person meeting and start of travel together to other areas of China!
June 21, 2010: Engaged!!!
September 1, 2010: Switched course from K1 to CR-1
December 8, 2010: Wedding date set; it will be on February 18, 2011!
February 9, 2011: Depart for China
February 11, 2011: Registered for marriage in Wuhan, officially married!!!
February 18, 2011: Wedding ceremony in Shiyan!!!
April 22, 2011: Mailed I-130 to Chicago
April 28, 2011: Received NOA1 via text/email, file routed to CSC (priority date April 25th)
April 29, 2011: Updated
May 3, 2011: Received NOA1 hardcopy in mail
July 26, 2011: Received NOA2 via text/email!!!
July 30, 2011: Received NOA2 hardcopy in mail
August 8, 2011: NVC received file
September 1, 2011: NVC case number assigned
September 2, 2011: AOS invoice received, OPTIN email for EP sent
September 7, 2011: Paid AOS bill (payment portal showed PAID on September 9, 2011)
September 8, 2011: OPTIN email accepted, GZO number assigned
September 10, 2011: Emailed AOS package
September 12, 2011: IV bill invoiced
September 13, 2011: Paid IV bill (payment portal showed PAID on September 14, 2011)
September 14, 2011: Emailed IV package
October 3, 2011: Emailed checklist response (checklist generated due to typo on Form DS-230)
October 6, 2011: Case complete at NVC
November 10, 2011: Interview - APPROVED!!!
December 7, 2011: POE - Sea-Tac Airport

September 17, 2013: Mailed I-751 to CSC

September 23, 2013: Received NOA1 in mail (receipt date September 19th)

October 16, 2013: Biometrics Appointment

January 28, 2014: Production of new Green Card ordered

February 3, 2014: New Green Card received; done with USCIS until fall of 2023*

 

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Cost of doing business.


“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

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If the fathers' names are not on the birth certificates, they can't do anything to prevent the child leaving.  If they are on the paperwork, you can either get their signature (at their price), go to court and get a court order, or follow the process to serve notice about the child, and if they never respond, you take the evidence that the father could not be located to court.

 

If a father is on the paperwork and they father is NOT supporting the child, go pay a Colombian lawyer to serve notice to that father that they now have to start paying child support.  You'll probably be amazed how quickly they sign the permission to leave the country.

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My understanding is that failure to cooperate with a Colombian court order for child support can result in jail time.  Colombian jails are not known for their luxury.  I'm not saying its a quick process, but if the deadbeat knows there is a Gringo with gringo money (whatever that is in reality, its irrelevant - perception is reality) they know that the lawyers can make their lives hell.

First thing is to make sure the father signed on each birth certificate.  IF they didn't, you just show up to the airport with the birth certificate that has no father's name, they'll scrutinize the ####### out of it, and then send you on your way.

If they are on the birth certificate, and they continue not to cooperate, it can be a long drawn out process, especially depending on where the father lives.  However, if the father is a deadbeat, and even if he starts out asking for $5,000, remember that everything is negotiable.  He wants money more than he wants the child.  He doesn't want to be bothered by a gringo.  Just make sure you phrase everything so it doesn't seem threatening.  Nobody faces a threat like a Colombian.

Tell him "I understand that getting the signature will take some of your time and effort, and I'll pay you for your work..."  Now its a negotiation for his work, not for the child.

If he just won't budge, get a lawyer and let the lawyer play hardball. 

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My understanding is that there are Fathers, plural.

 

So the principle is the same but the situations for each may be different.

 

 


“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

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4 hours ago, Co2EEUU said:

just show up to the airport with the birth certificate that has no father's name, they'll scrutinize the ####### out of it, and then send you on your way.

That's assuming the US will issue the visa without any document granting permission or a court order. The CO is almost certainly going to ask about the father before issuing the visa.


Timelines:

Spoiler

AOS (I-485 + I-131 + I-765):

9/25/17: sent forms to Chicago

9/27/17: received by USCIS

10/4/17: NOA1 electronic notification received

10/10/17: NOA1 hard copy received. Social Security card being issued in married name (3rd attempt!)

10/14/17: Biometrics appointment notice received

10/25/17: Biometrics

1/2/18: EAD + AP approved (no website update)

1/5/18: EAD + AP mailed

1/8/18: EAD + AP approval notice hardcopies received

1/10/18: EAD + AP received

9/5/18: Interview scheduled notice

10/17/18: Interview

10/24/18: Green card produced notice

10/25/18: Formal approval

10/31/18: Green card received

 

K-1:

Spoiler

I-129F

12/1/17: sent

12/14/17: NOA1 hard copy received

3/10/17: RFE (IMB verification)

3/22/17: RFE response received

3/24/17: Approved!

3/30/17: NOA2 hard copy received

 

NVC

4/6/2017: Received

4/12/2017: Sent to Riyadh embassy

4/16/2017: Case received at Riyadh embassy

4/21/2017: Request case transfer to Manila, approved 4/24/2017

 

K-1

5/1/2017: Case received by Manila (1 week embassy transfer??? Lucky~)

7/13/2017: Interview: APPROVED!!!

7/19/2017: Visa in hand

8/15/2017: POE

 

 

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Agree, not something they will ignore.


“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

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59 minutes ago, geowrian said:

That's assuming the US will issue the visa without any document granting permission or a court order. The CO is almost certainly going to ask about the father before issuing the visa.

It may sound odd, but the U.S. has no interest in whether the father gives authorization for a child to leave.  The Visa is for ENTRY to the U.S., not EXIT from the country of origin.  The only time this would come up is if the child later petitions for a father for a visa, and the father was not listed. 

What could happen is the visa is issued and then the child cannot leave the country.  However, if that happened, then you could always look into crossing into a third country first where it isn't as well supervised (there are border crossings into Ecuador, for instance) and then leave from Ecuador to the U.S.

There is nothing in the Visa issuance process where a Colombian parent has to give permission to issue the visa.  The Colombian parents have nothing to do with the U.S. Embassy's jurisdiction.

 

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