Please advice, for VAWA

[amerikaask 2]

Hi, I have a question for you. Frankly, I'd like to take your comments or predictions. I have been living in America for 3.5 years on a student visa and I still have a legal student visa.  I'm studying computer engineering at a school and I'm 22 years old. I met an American woman in September 2017 and applied for a marriage on Valentine's day on February 14, and then I got married after couple days. At first, the marriage didn't go badly, then marriage was a very bad situation for me. 

My wife's mother was a drug addict and my wife never loved her family. My wife was adopted by a family when she was 15, and then her step-parents threw my wife out when my wife 18. My wife's father is dead ( 10 years ago ). My wife rarely talks to her step-and-step family also own mom family. I don't want to write too much, I just want to give you important details. My wife is only 20 years old and she is a student and American.

 

1-) We spent time together for almost 4.5 months before we got married, and my wife wanted to marry me and she offered me a marriage.  From the first day we met, my wife has always said that she is alone at night, she needs a man who can't sleep comfortably, maybe at least 1000 times.

2-) We were small arguing two or three times before we got married, but my wife always apologized to me after argue.  My wife used to say that she was very lonely and was sometimes very angry because she was afraid of loneliness.  My wife said she was very sensitive because she was alone and afraid to lose me, so that's why she was arguing with me. I was trying to empathize and forgive my wife.  I mean, I believed her because his father died, her mother was a drug addict, her stepmother threw my wife out, and he's not very good with his brothers and sisters. 

3) After marriage, me and my wife lived together in a two-bedroom house with a roommate. 

4-) My wife was very irritable or sensitive at times, and she was very docile at times. After a month of marriage, my wife's mood was changing all the time. After a discussion on March 21, my wife hit my chest very hard and I had to go to the Emergency room the next day. ( I have all hospital document )

5-) We made peace again, but in this period I started to learn important information about my wife. My wife and I were always texting during the day because my wife and I were forbidden to have a telephone conversation at work. My wife apologized to me, she said;  didn't know why she hit me, and she was tried to commit suicide a few times before me. Also she even crashed her old car. Because my wife hit her car on the wall. So she tried to commit suicide. After a long conversation, my wife promised me she'd go to a psychologist, and then we got back together. Believe me, I was so scared that day.

6-) My wife went to visit her old house by April 15th because she used to live in her old house with her brother and roommate. She said to me ' i'm with my brother' And I wanted to video talk my wife that night but she seemed to be lying all the time. Then my wife confessed to meeting me with her ex-boyfriend. She didn't come my home that night, and we had argue again. ( My wife confessed to me through the message and I still have the messages. )

7-)  I wanted to divorce my wife ( around May) , but my wife didn't want to divorce me. A week later, my wife came to the house where we lived together. I told her not to come and bother me. My wife said she brought me her ex-boyfriend and that her ex-boyfriend was a very dangerous ( ex has criminal history ) man, and she had to talk to me. I was so scared that day and I called my best friend. I went home with my best friend and my wife came home alone. My wife was angry and she seemed to have had a drink or weed. I told her I wanted to get divorced several times when I was with my friend.  ( I have all text messages  from my wife about she is ex and criminal history )

8-) My wife was always swearing at home. My wife was swearing at my family and friends. I told my wife I'd call the 911 if you didn't leave the house, and my wife took the knife on the table and tried to attack me. My wife squeezed my throat and could have killed me with a knife.  I and my friend recorded the video, so when my wife attacked me i recorded the video and called the 911 twice. My friend took my wife out and my wife ran away when she saw the cops coming.  

9-) After attack my wife sent me and and my friend a text and apologized many times.  She said she'd get a divorce if I didn't complain. The police department took copies of the attack videos ( 3 videos total 2 min ) and text messages and officer said I could get protection if I wanted to.  After 1 week my wife asked me to annulment the marriage with she is step mom. She didn't ask me to get a normal divorce, and she just said she'd get a divorce if the marriage was annulment . My wife also told me that  annulment is better than a normal divorce. If I annulment the marriage, my wife would have no trouble, and she said she'd get divorced. Also my wife's step-mom asked only to annulment the marriage. Otherwise, they said they will find the best lawyers for deport me. 

10 -) My wife's stepmother has a very rich family and big connections. They forced me to cancel the marriage. And I got a lawyer. My wife and I applied for annulment. The court refused to accept our annulment. Because marriage annulment is very different from normal divorce. During the annulment, my wife and cousin called me and apologized. My wife said she's changed a lot she is self and she won't make mistakes again. My wife also said she was going to the psychologist. Also my wife was sent me pictures. In these pictures, my wife showed that she convert to my religion, that she had the same religion as me. Then my family come to America for help my marriage, and my wife's family and my family met, and we thought we could be together one more time. 

11- ) 1 month after ( October 2018 ) being with my wife again, my wife returned to her old personality and all time asked for money. Besides, she was always trying to make me sexually. Se called me gay if I didn't accept sexual intercourse. She was again swearing. She kept threatening. I wanted to get my wife out of the house again. As of October 2018, my wife came home again, unaware of me, and began to argue with me. My dad came home when she tried to slap me and we fired my wife from house. Then my wife threatened me with a message. My wife always told me I'm gonna deport u. Me and my dad went to the police department for the second time and asked them to call my wife. The police officer called my wife and my wife didn't call me again. Because if my wife calls me, the police will arrest her. Now I've found my best lawyer, and I want to start my case, but there's something I'd like to ask you.

 

Now ,

 

1- ) I have good connection with my wife's family. My wife's own mother and brothers, sisters, uncle and grand mom loves me and we have maybe more than 50 different pictures together . There are also photos of my wife and my family being together. My wife's own mother and I are constantly texting. And last month my wife's mother says her daughter is psychologically ill, and she needs to go to the doctor immediately.  And everyone in my wife's family says she is sick (bipolar or disorder ). I also have video recordings when my wife's family talking about my wife's ill.

2- ) My wife told me with the text message that she needs a doctor who is bipolar or a similar ill 2 or 3 times. ( when we texting on the phone ) My wife also sent me text message the details of the therapist center she went to. 

3-) I keep text messages close to 1000 pages with my wife and I keep them all. I also have my best friend with me when my wife is attacking me with a knife, and he recorded attack video. My wife had sex with someone else ( she text me ) , tried to commit suicide ( she texted me), and after the attack.  

I mean, I keep all the messages of my wife and her family. Because I was a driver, so we could just text. And my wife was always sending messages when she had problem or etc.

4- ) My roommate was at home when my wife punched me and  I went to the emergency room with my roommate.  My father has seen my wife's threats several times. My other close friends know my wife attacked. 

5-)  I'm coming to my question now. I have these documents.; 2 police reports , 911 records , medical report ( my chest xray ) , over 1000 pages text messages from my wife , instagram messages , my wife's moms messages . My friends witness. 

6) I have Joint bank account ( about 3 months statement) but my wife closed to account last month because of last attack.  Birthday letters , rental agreement under both names , birthday gifts. I don't have a car and my wife bought car after marriage under she is mom name ( i'm not sure ) so we don't have joint insurance. Also i have couple mail from Bank, insurance and court under my wife name showing my address . We don't have tax return because we been married only 9 months.  Besides, my wife and I had  more than to 250 different photos and my wife was using my debit card firs couple months. 

7-) I've been going to the psychologist for four months. I'm taking antidepressants, and I'm going to the therapist soon.

8-) My wife and I have gifts to each other. My wife and I have special cards ( she wrote for me for birthday etc ) for each other.  I also have the book my wife studying to learn my language. 

9-) There are text messages from my wife's family asking for money from me all the time.

 

There's a lot of things I can't remember for proof. I just want to stay in this country and graduate my college. Also I have never applied to the green card with my wife. I mean, we didn't apply during the marriage. Because I never trusted my wife.  

 

I have a good lawyer and I'm just scared something. I mean, I'm really in a bad mood. I can't think very well now. I'm going to be 23 and my blood pressure is always too high. My wife always threatens me , never helps me, and always wants money, and she's cheating on me with other men as if it wasn't enough. 3 times also physical violence. I'm sooo exhausted.

 

You know what my wife wants from me? She wanna get a contract because my wife wants me to have a kid from me. If we don't have kids, my wife won't sign the papers for divorce. When se ask this contract my divorce divorce lawyer witnessed it. Even my divorce lawyer is afraid of my wife. 

 

I just need information from you.

 

Thank you so much.

 

[CEE53147 559]

You had no right to keep her from her and your home without a court order directing that she not be there.

 

Since you state you only care about finishing your degree, as long as you have maintained your F1 visa status, there is no problem. A  VAWA determination is not necessary for you to attend school.

 

What you have posted here indicates that you want to remain long term on the basis of this marriage yet nothing has been started. I see problems in your story.

 

 

 

 

[Going through 5,671]

 

7 hours ago, amerikaask said:

Also I have never applied to the green card with my wife. I mean, we didn't apply during the marriage. Because I never trusted my wife.  

 

You married in Feb. 2018.  It's now November.  I don't understand what you mean by never filing the AOS because you didn't trust your wife when you got married?

 

7 hours ago, amerikaask said:

I just want to stay in this country and graduate my college.

VAWA has nothing to do with continuing your studies so long as your student visa is valid.

 

 

[amerikaask 2]

@Going through

Because 30 days after the marriage, my wife was physically assaulted. The second physical intervention was 2 months after the marriage. I mean, if I had applied to the green card, maybe I would have had more trouble with my wife. Finally, a friend of mine told me that I could find a good lawyer and apply for AOS with out my wife.

 

So i just need little advice. That’s why i’m here

[Going through 5,671]

6 minutes ago, amerikaask said:

@Going through

Because 30 days after the marriage, my wife was physically assaulted. The second physical intervention was 2 months after the marriage. I mean, if I had applied to the green card, maybe I would have had more trouble with my wife. Finally, a friend of mine told me that I could find a good lawyer and apply for AOS with out my wife.

 

So i just need little advice. That’s why i’m here

Ok, gotcha.

 

What is your marital status now?  Legally separated, legally divorced, living elsewhere, etc.?

Also, what State are you living in?  Divorces can still happen even if the spouse won't sign the paperwork, in many instances.

Since you said your divorce lawyer was present when she mentioned blackmail---what did he say to her?

Edited November 17, 2018 by Going through

[amerikaask 2]

@Going through

I filed a divorce  20 days ago. Our divorce process is going on right now. But my wife still sends me a message and says she wants to be together.  I'm planning to change the state because I'm scared where I am. I live in Massachusetts.

[Going through 5,671]

If you have evidence of entering the marriage with bonafide intent, as well as evidence of the physical assaults that happened and evidence of you seeing the psychologist/therapist (who would provide an evaluation) that's a good place to start with a VAWA.

Edited November 17, 2018 by Going through

[Going through 5,671]

1 minute ago, amerikaask said:

@Going through

I filed a divorce  20 days ago. Our divorce process is going on right now. But my wife still sends me a message and says she wants to be together.  I'm planning to change the state because I'm scared where I am. I live in Massachusetts.

I would suggest not replying back to her in any way.  Since you have no children together, and presumably you both have lawyers there's no reason for any direct contact between the two of you.  

 

Not contacting her also saves you from some mental/emotional exhaustion.  It's good that you'e filed for divorce.

[amerikaask 2]

@Going through

I found the best law firm in the state I'm in.  They examined my case, and they're not a lawyer who accepts everyone's case. In fact, my lawyer has served well in ( big position ) UCSIS for years before. Helping my case they agreed.

It's been 14 months with my wife, and all the texts we've sent each other from first day. 

1- Only messages will show how crazy my wife is. I've transferred these messages to PDF and it's more than 1500 pages.

2- Police reports and attack videos are best real evidence. Instagram and Facebook messages are still keept. 

3- My wife doesn't want to divorce from me and she still want me to have a child. My wife told my lawyer that she didn't want to divorce me if I didn't have a child with my wife. 

4- The video clearly shows my wife attacked with a knife. It's also a witness on attack day, and I have that day text messages between my wife and me for proof attack video. 

 

[amerikaask 2]

@CEE53147

First of all, I loved my wife and complaining about her would be a bad stain in her life. If I wanted an arrest warrant for her, my wife want to be a nurse in the future, and this arrest could interfere with her life.

Second of all, can you think more smart? Why do you think hundreds of thousands of people apply for green card every year?  Or why there are 20,000 people waiting to hear from VAWA. 

I had a marriage. And I've been subjected to physical and psychological pressure many times. And there's 100% evidence of what I'm saying. Do you think the whole problem is that I wanna apply for VAWA?

Edited November 17, 2018 by amerikaask
username

[Boiler 45,654]

Sounds like the very last person who you would want as your nurse.

[geowrian 22,337]

14 hours ago, amerikaask said:

You know what my wife wants from me? She wanna get a contract because my wife wants me to have a kid from me. If we don't have kids, my wife won't sign the papers for divorce.

She doesn't have to sign anything. You can divorce without her signing anything.

5 hours ago, amerikaask said:

Second of all, can you think more smart?

...

[Boiler 45,654]

36 minutes ago, geowrian said:

She doesn't have to sign anything. You can divorce without her signing anything.

...

Odd that a lawyer never mentioned that?

[Going through 5,671]

On 11/17/2018 at 7:32 AM, amerikaask said:

3- My wife doesn't want to divorce from me and she still want me to have a child. My wife told my lawyer that she didn't want to divorce me if I didn't have a child with my wife. 

 

On 11/16/2018 at 10:16 PM, amerikaask said:

She wanna get a contract because my wife wants me to have a kid from me. If we don't have kids, my wife won't sign the papers for divorce. When se ask this contract my divorce divorce lawyer witnessed it.

 

For the second time, I'm going to ask what your divorce lawyer said in response to her when she brought up IN FRONT OF YOUR LAWYER that she plans on blackmailing you?

[amerikaask 2]

5 minutes ago, Going through said:

 

 

For the second time, I'm going to ask what your divorce lawyer said in response to her when she brought up IN FRONT OF YOUR LAWYER that she plans on blackmailing you?

My lawyer was shocked. My lawyer gave me an hour to talk to my wife and told my wife that if she doesn't calm down, we'd use our legal rights.  My wife and I talked again outside, and we got a new appointment from the lawyer.  After couple days my wife called my lawyer and left a voice mail.  My wife swears and insults to my divorce lawyer by voice message. My lawyer would have decided to arrest her, but my wife agreed to divorce and signed the papers.