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My husband have become this control freak since I received by EAD.... I have a five months old baby so that's making it hard for me to just pack-up and go back to my home country but that's what I feel like doing. On friday I received my SSN so I went ahead on applied for a few job online. So he is upset that I did not wait until he get home to do the applications. So now he have taking away my birth certificate, SSN, EAD and my son's birth certificate.... My interview date is the month.... What can I do been that I do really have any status?

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I'm sorry, this sounds like a horror movie.. I am sure someone will have advice soon to help from the visa perspective.. But psychologically, just know there are people here that care.. I wish I had advice.. But any advice cannot know what the future holds.. Hang in there.. To me it sounds like your husband wants to be The Important One in your life, and he feels threatened that you are ready to branch out.. Again, I'm sorry.. We all have different ideas of what a marriage should look like.. I hope you 2 will find time to talk, and maybe even let him bear some of the responsibility he so much desires.. Hopefully, he will want your help if he senses his alternative is to carry the full burden alone..


I don't always get my posts deleted on V.J., but when I do it's a good indication I was right and they couldn't handle it !!!

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*** Thread moved from "AOS from WS&T Visas" main forum to the Effects of Major Changes forum, where similar situations are often discussed. ***


06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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My husband have become this control freak since I received by EAD.... I have a five months old baby so that's making it hard for me to just pack-up and go back to my home country but that's what I feel like doing. On friday I received my SSN so I went ahead on applied for a few job online. So he is upset that I did not wait until he get home to do the applications. So now he have taking away my birth certificate, SSN, EAD and my son's birth certificate.... My interview date is the month.... What can I do been that I do really have any status?

Hi,

You can only get status through him.

It's illegal for him to take your birth certificate, SSN card, and EAD card. Those are your personal property, and he has no legal basis to take them. It's called theft for him to keep them.

Go talk to an attorney. He is trying to control you and keep you dependent on him. Classic abuse pattern.

Best of luck

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Hi,

You can only get status through him.

It's illegal for him to take your birth certificate, SSN card, and EAD card. Those are your personal property, and he has no legal basis to take them. It's called theft for him to keep them.

Go talk to an attorney. He is trying to control you and keep you dependent on him. Classic abuse pattern.

Best of luck

My main concern is about the custody of my son...... If I leave I don't want to go without him

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OP pause...was he jealous B4 the marriage? ...maybe thought it was love & cute ..Nope

The child will not (*well is not suppose to get a JA PP without him) hew rules

To remove the child from the country would be a criminal act without his approval

I applaud the fact you want to keep him in the childs life.

Don't you have an older family member or Minister that can talk to him about his

jealousy and insecurities? after all you just had a baby, however ladies should

be beware of men who tries to separate them from families & friends ,and

insist on micr-management its not healthy., everyone needs some space

Can you still communicate with him on a reasonable level? Taking your docs away

is oppressive & illegal, if the day comes for interview & you are not there because he

cause you not to, I say report the matter to the police, so that record can be in your

favor, you obviously have a bonafied marriage...Pray .. Allow him to feel like the

man he should be but never allow him to abuse you any ways....wishing you the best.

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Unless the baby has a Jamaican passport?

No. It doesn't matter if the U.S. citizen child residing in the U.S. has a foreign passport.

Removing the child from his home without the father's permission or a court order by the mother would be a crime. The crime is parental kidnapping. When one parent takes a child without the other parent's permission, it's a crime.

Edited by aaron2020

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OP pause...was he jealous B4 the marriage? ...maybe thought it was love & cute ..Nope

The child will not (*well is not suppose to get a JA PP without him) hew rules

To remove the child from the country would be a criminal act without his approval

I applaud the fact you want to keep him in the childs life.

Don't you have an older family member or Minister that can talk to him about his

jealousy and insecurities? after all you just had a baby, however ladies should

be beware of men who tries to separate them from families & friends ,and

insist on micr-management its not healthy., everyone needs some space

Can you still communicate with him on a reasonable level? Taking your docs away

is oppressive & illegal, if the day comes for interview & you are not there because he

cause you not to, I say report the matter to the police, so that record can be in your

favor, you obviously have a bonafied marriage...Pray .. Allow him to feel like the

man he should be but never allow him to abuse you any ways....wishing you the best.

He didn't show any sign of jealousy or insecurities but he cheated sixteen days after I had my baby and I found out so that why he's acting like that

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