SAME SEX COUPLE LIVING IN IZMIR AGE DIFFERENCE IS BIG

[fmonda 0]

My spouse and I met almost a year ago, I am living and working in Izmir Turkey and we have been living together since we met . He is a student at the university I teach at . We have a big age difference 38 years . he is 19 I am 57 we are very happy together. We would like to relocate back home to the states for gay life is very limited for us , As you can see at gay pride in Istanbul they disrupted the gay pride rally shooting water canons at people attending for they didn't want rally in Taksim square. Anyway we know we would be happier back home , we love each other and we have no problem with our age, He is very mature and acts older than me sometimes i seem more immature than him at times haha. We had to travel to Cape Town South Africa which allows' same sex marriage and he didnt need visa to go there, but his family does not know he is gay and cant know. We are happy and want to live our life together back in my home country, we havent done anything yet , just wondering should we get a lawyer or try on our own, We are very happy and he never wanted to go to the states I felt our life would be better in the states as a gay couple . Should we get a lawyer, I already wrote to one and he said age difference could be a problem but our relationship is legitimate.We spent last Christmas together and I met his family but they dont know about us being gay only we are friends from university. We cant come out here. I know about CR1 visa do i need a lawyer or should i file, age should not be a factor for love , yes we do love each other , he has changed my life and I cherish him and look forward to getting older with him. I know I am judged by many but my family and close friends love him and see the genuine relationship we have , we dont focus on our age.We want to build a happy life for us but its not viable here even though I love Izmir and beautiful city on the Agean Sea. Our marriage is hidden as is our sexuality as well so we cant be ourselves , we want to be able to have a life together as long as it can be for.

[Elprofe 0]

Congratulations on finding love.

Ii also met my future husband abroad, a year and a half ago, we have a 20 years age difference, and his fiancé visa was approved 3 weeks ago. You do not need a lawyer. You just have to follow all the instructions you will find in this website to prepare your k-1 visa application.

Your relationship is real, you will be able to prove that, you will be given a k-1 visa. If you are ready, move on, the process is long.

Good luck

[kamw 93]

They are already married- k1 no longer applicable.

I believe you have to follow the IR-1 /CR-1 Spouse Visa track:

http://www.visajourney.com/wiki/index.php/EZGuideSpouse

[Ryan H 3,812]

OP, familiarize yourself with the required forms and instructions that accompany them and decide what your comfort level is in filling them out. If you are comfortable completing them yourself, then a lawyer probably won't be necessary. On the flip side, if you feel too overwhelmed and uncomfortable, then legal or professional assistance may be for you.

Ultimately, the decision can only be made by you.

[fmonda 0]

so am glad t here they cant dicriminate on age, we are a real relationship and love na d care , concern and hope for a good future, I hope it goes well we document alot on facebook about us , we live together and have joint account .only we must be discreet at times for we cant let all know of this, his family doesnt know anything, and we choose to leave that way. We are very happy together, thanks for responses

[Anh map 2,098]

The burden of proof is on the beneficiary to show that this is a bona fide relationship and not just for immigration purposes. That is where the age difference can be an issue.

That being said you two should put together the strongest evidence that you can showing the development of your relationship. Comingling of finances is one of the more common items. Evidence of travel together, Any life insurance that you have should show your spouse as beneficiary. Your US tax return should be filed as married. Copies of wedding announcements, etc. should be included as well.

Be prepared for the potential of deeply personal questions at the interview. This is possible for any couple. If you two claim you have been living together for XX amount of time then you ought to be able to answer. No need for sordid details. But just answer honestly.

[Rachel23 9]

Don't worry and be happy.

My husband is 32 years older than me, he is 55 ans I am 23 We love each other so much and I am more mature than him lol just same like u guys. He comes over each 3 months, we have lot of pictures together, we rent a house together where I live now, he knows my family his family came from Mexico to Dom Rep for our wedding, we got lot of facebook, whatsapp, skype and phone conversations and lot of stuff. We got Marry August last year and my interview at the embassy is in 2 weeks. We met on Dominican Cupid we talked to each other for 8 months he couldn't come by then but we were very close to each other saw each other every night on skype, talked all day on skype and phone calls so he asked me to get marry and we did. He came 3 days before our wedding and we stayed at my parents home. He is an amazing man, he has been divorce and have three kids two of them older than me.

We know our interview will be little hard but we have lot of evidence to show so we are no scared. My husband is coming one day before the interview so we will go together. BTW we did everything by ourselves.

We are not a gay couple but we have big different age too. My husband looks very young, he is a very healthy man, work out and eat healthy.

Edited July 3, 2015 by Rachel23

[Rachel23 9]

Does your husband originally from your country? Have you already got your CR-1 visa? Age difference is not much of the problem, but it does bring a red-flag at the time of interview which opens to scrutinze a case by officer more carefully. Of course, no officer will ever say that why this and that couples were scrutinzed more in depth, but age difference is behind all this most of the time. Besides, OP is in a same-sex relationship which is not tradition one (hetro-sexual relationships) because most people still are not used to this kinda of relationship...which is why OP hasn't told about his relationship to his spouse's family or anyone else unlike you who I'm sure must have flaunted your relationship with pride to the whole world....Each case is different and its decided based on its merit.

I understand ur point. My husband is from Mexico but he lives in the United States e ia citizen. My interview is in two weeks so I have not a CR1 visa yet.

No matter how much they scrutinaze if they both have Evidence to prove the bona fide of their relation.

Being gay in this century is something so Normal and society have to accept it. Everybody has the right to be happy with whom they want to. If me a 23 years old woman is happy married with a 55 years old man and it is normal at least in my country why if being gay is so normal right now they can't have a different age too?.

Here thanks God we go out, walk, subway, beach, resorts and everything and nobody look at us or gossip. I imagine how hard it is for u guys, One day ur partner will have to talk to his family about his sexual orientation if they love him they will accept him as he is.

Edited July 3, 2015 by Rachel23

[Rachel23 9]

I'am not telling u guys this will be easy cuz even in my case we know it will not. But you should get ready for this process and for all the questions and evidence they will ask for.

[Not a Tailor 1,370]

I would submit a I-130 package, OP. You can do this without a lawyer--my wife and I (also same sex, though from a more safe country) did this and we had no troubles. Follow the guides on the site and read the forms over carefully. Collect up every bit of evidence you can to overcome the age difference. The age difference may not be a problem, but then again it depends upon the person interviewing, so best to be proactive. No one knows anything about who you will get interviewing you and certainly the people interviewing may not know much about gay culture--you are certainly not the only gay male married couple that I know with a big age difference and I personally don't see it as that unusual.

Make sure to put as much evidence in as you can with the initial filing and continue to collect it. When you get to NVC stage, I would send (even though they will not ask for this) a stack of additional evidence with your documents that will be requested at NVC stage. This is called side loading. The reason for this is that it is well known that often the person interviewing at embassy/consulate stage has already made their decision based upon the evidence they had BEFORE the interview. Then also take additional evidence to the interview itself.

Evidence can include (this is not a list of the only things that work, but is a list of things that may be helpful. You also do not need to have every single thing on the list):
Photos of you together--back these up, if possible, with receipts showing that both of you paid for things or other evidence you were in the same place such as bus tickets with both your names on, etc.
Affidavits from relatives or friends (does your family know about him? Are they excited to meet him? If so, see if someone will write a letter to this effect--Affidavits are not good evidence on their own, but as part of a body of evidence can help paint a positive picture)
Ticket stubs showing trips you have taken together.
Lease showing both names. (If this cannot be obtained, see if you can, for example, get a statement from his bank and a statement from your bank that shows both of you have a shared home address)
Shared bank accounts, phone accounts, anything else. (Obviously these may not have been possible for you in your area, just do your best. Any membership to a club you might have together, etc)
Receipts from dinners out.
Birthday cards, congratulations cards, etc regarding weddings or anything else that might have both your names on it, any kind of personal correspondence for both of you.

Just do your best to support things and keep evidence of any vacations or anything you take.

Make sure that you will have enough assets in America or a guaranteed paycheque in America that will allow you to meet 125% of the poverty line for two people. If not, you will need to find a cosponsor--someone living in America with either permanent residency or citizenship who makes enough to sponsor 125% of their household plus your husband.

Don't lie about anything, whatever you do. Don't be tempted to imply that his family knows when they don't. There was another user awhile back that ended up in big trouble (possibly rejected, I don't know, I didn't see the story through to the end) because they thought their father had agreed to their same sex union--he even wrote an affidavit--but when the consulate called the father to check on the affidavit's validity, the father denied having written it. It was a mess.

Make sure that his spoken English is very clear if you are not fluent in his language or if you cannot prove 100% that you are fluent in his language. This may be a big point in your favour at interview stage and you have probably close to a year before he will interview to make sure that his English is very good. Consulates and embassies have been known to have very large questions about communication, even with couples who have used technology to make things work, if there is not proof of a shared language of fluency.

Also, when it does come to interview stage, travel with him to the interview even if he cannot take you into the embassy/consulate with him (some embassies expect the petitioner--that's you--to attend the interview, others don't have space, but ALL look favourably upon the petitioner waiting around outside to offer support to the spouse) and try to have evidence of this. A good piece of evidence is often considered to be handing him your passport to take in and show the consular officer interviewing him. Check in with your country/region's boards to see if your consulate/embassy allows the petitioner to come in with him.

You can very easily overcome the age difference with a small amount of work and some preparedness. Make sure to read reviews from your consulate/embassy. There's always some uncertainty with same sex because there are so few of us, but it is getting normalized and you can definitely do this on your own. Just take your time preparing your packages and be prepared to show evidence.

[Rachel23 9]

That's so kind from you saying I look older than hubby jejeje. Two persons have said that this week to meet lol.

Talk to ur girl it is more easy her to move with u than you going back to ur country. In our case my husband says if visa is denied he will sell everything and we will both move to Mexico, all his family lives in Mexico he is all alone in the US. I want to have a baby girl soon so I just want all of this passed to set up our lives together.

OP I wish you the best luck. Hope u guy find the way to make it work

[fmonda 0]

thanks everyone for all the info thanks we sent out our packet last week :-), for spouse visa is one year taxes enough