SO CALLED RED FLAGS Im worried about

[forgottenlady 2]

Gosh, welcome to immigration...it's a world of it's own and yes, still a bit sexist...

The woman being 27 or 30 or even 10 years older than the man is a HUGE red flag for a LOT of countires. When it comes to immigration.

oh Sorry guys I AM THE FIANCEE, I am from Philippines so basically? it isnt an issue?

[Darnell 8,478]

still isn't an issue, as older uscitizen male with younger fils lass IS THE NORM at the IV Unit in Manila.

It's a societal norm there.

[forgottenlady 2]

It is not an issue of whether the CO wouldn't really know exactly how you two feel towards each other or not. It's about the material evidence you present or provide to support your case that will 'speak' for your case.

Regarding "can you guys help me see the real picture of our love story?" -- I don't think it matters as to how anyone see your "love story". Not sure if you need any approval from anyone to see your real love story besides both of your immediate families and friends. That said, I see some positives with your story relating to having met some of the conditions for filing an I-129F petition.

First, per your story above, you two have met prior to filing any petition which will fulfill that one big requirement - meeting within the last two years prior to filing the fiance/e petition.

Secondly, I personally do not see the age difference as a drawback. 27yrs is a big enough an age gab but definitely it's not unheard of and an outlier. I have known couples who are 25, 30 and even 40 years older than their partners. It's how you two feels towards each other that is the most important thing. Of course a CO have every right under the law to ask a or two question about your age, but it's how you handle the question(s) that will do the trick.

I would say, spend your time gathering much info from the time that you two spent together. Take lots of photos, keep receipts of shopping, boarding/travel passes, iteneraries, receipts of gifts to each other, stamps of your passports etc etc. If you don't much evidence for your last meeting, I would suggest you plan another trip to meet prior to filing the petition. That would give you guys another opportunity to gather more info.

Again, it's the body of evidence you present about your "real love story" to the USCIS/CO is what matters not how anyone in a forum sees it. Good luck!

ETA: this is the link to the guide - http://www.visajourney.com/content/k1guide

Hi Boggy1974

Thanks a lot I dont know why I am feeling down at some point of this journey. Unfortunately, I don't think we can spend more time together before my interview, I am scheduled on the 2oth. However I guess all of the pictures we got since day 1 would definitely show how the LOVE grows each day of his vacation here. It was a short trip that end up to be the most special event of my life.

I appreciate your insights, I guess what I am trying to to is to create a rebuttal "the best rebuttal" that I can tell them if they wont be convinced with all the papers and answers I will provide.

I have heard a lot of scary stories who I believe should have been approved but get denied. I hate my self that I am wasting my time thinking about awful things of this journey. It is exhausting.

Maybe its a form of "defense mechanism" that I am getting ready for whatever possible result. Because it will definitely break our hearts.

I wish you guys all the best. I am trying to be positive and I will let my heart speak with the CO. I guess with that. He/she would feel how I love my fiance.

Best,

still isn't an issue, as older uscitizen male with younger fils lass IS THE NORM at the IV Unit in Manila.

It's a societal norm there.

Oh thanks Darnell. Yes I think so. maybe Im just being too harsh on myself. Thanks for your response

[Darnell 8,478]

No one is teasing you for being in love with a grandpa, so that's a plus.

Relax, a bit, aye?

[forgottenlady 2]

No one is teasing you for being in love with a grandpa, so that's a plus.

Relax, a bit, aye?

you calling my fiance a grandpa?

[Darnell 8,478]

nope, not me !

[duraaraa 203]

Try making a timeline of the relationship. Try to put how your feelings changed or grew over the timeline. Get your fiance to contribute. I did that and I feel a lot better about my chances, because I can see how anyone who looks at it would understand the relationship.

[Boggy1974 124]

Hi Boggy1974

Thanks a lot I dont know why I am feeling down at some point of this journey. Unfortunately, I don't think we can spend more time together before my interview, I am scheduled on the 2oth. However I guess all of the pictures we got since day 1 would definitely show how the LOVE grows each day of his vacation here. It was a short trip that end up to be the most special event of my life.

I appreciate your insights, I guess what I am trying to to is to create a rebuttal "the best rebuttal" that I can tell them if they wont be convinced with all the papers and answers I will provide.

I have heard a lot of scary stories who I believe should have been approved but get denied. I hate my self that I am wasting my time thinking about awful things of this journey. It is exhausting.

Maybe its a form of "defense mechanism" that I am getting ready for whatever possible result. Because it will definitely break our hearts.

I wish you guys all the best. I am trying to be positive and I will let my heart speak with the CO. I guess with that. He/she would feel how I love my fiance.

Best,

Oh thanks Darnell. Yes I think so. maybe Im just being too harsh on myself. Thanks for your response

forgottenlady,

I'm glad your spirits are up now. Be positive and lets hope the good evidence you've presented will suffice to put you through.

Good luck! And keep us posted.

Edited February 2, 2013 by Boggy1974

[Cathi 5,621]

come study at MENA, aye?

darnell I am 21 years older than my husband and it wasn't even mentioned at the interview. My husband is from a high fraud MENA country

Edited February 2, 2013 by mimolicious

[MedRoni 161]

come study at MENA, aye?

EXACTLY!

darnell I am 21 years older than my husband and it wasn't even mentioned at the interview. My husband is from a high fraud MENA country

I am 7 years older than my husband and it was in fact brought up in his interview... also MENA country.

I didn't think 7 was so bad!!

Either way, best of luck to the OP!!

Edited February 2, 2013 by MedRoni

[StephAnn2012 50]

Forgottenlady - I'm wondering if you had a question behind the question. May I ask how long you have known your fiancee? How often do you speak with him? The reason I ask is that the feelings we all develop for a man or woman are very emotional and chemical at first. We are in love with the idea of being in love and things sound so promising that we put on rose colored glasses. Why am I saying all of this? Because I want to be honest with you about what to expect. Give yourself the opportunity to interview your relationship as if you were the Embassy Interviewer. Get with your fiancee and have him ask you the toughest question he can come up with about your true feelings about him, the age difference, religion, sex, money, the man's responsibility versus the woman's responsibility concerning house work, jobs, earning money, children and so on and so forth.

If you tackle these big issues during your courtship, having long, heartfelt discussions about whether you will have children or not, whether you will work outside the home or not, you will discover much more about him and he will discover much more about you. As you tackle these subjects with honest discussions, you will eliminate the fears that you have about what they will ask, because not only will you be prepared for almost any question, but you will have a clear understanding of his feelings on each of these subject.

Too often, couples just get on skype and are giddy and silly with each other and talk about nothing of real importance, because they "are in love" and things will just work themselves out.

I'm sensing that your real question was that you want to know how to be reassured that you are making the right decision and only you can answer that by going through these important discussions. The results of those will be mixed as with any couple and will require compromise by you and him.

I bet you guys make an amazing couple, just be sure that you have both eyes open and are not only prepared for the interview, but prepared for the radical change of leaving home, moving in with this man and spending the rest of his life as his wife.

I hope this post didn't sound harsh, I just had a feeling about some of the emotions behind your questions.

Good luck to you both!

[dekedwin 52]

Age is really only a perception in many ways. I know there are realities. A woman has a biological clock that is ticking. The man might have certain deteriorations relative to the aging process. I this these things vary greatly from individual to individual. My mother's first cousin was greatly criticized for marrying a woman who was young enough that she could have been his daughter, and the same situation was true with my brother-in-law. But, some people take care of themselves and even though they are older in chronalogical years, they are young in body and heart. Some people have the misfortune to be older earlier, and other people seem to be able to be young forever until they die. I would be considered to be an older person, but I am healthy, take not medications for anything, and feel young, agile, and healthy. I am younger than some people in their 20s and 30s, but I am past my mid 60s!

Some cultures do frown on older women with younger men. As I understand the culture of the Philippines does not frown on younger women marrying older men. So, if you fall in love, find the perfect person for you, go for it! I was told that the older man and the younger woman would be well accepted in the Philippines, but be prepared for some discrimination when you return to your Western country with your younger bride. But, I would say that, "Who cares!" You and your younger brided do not have to answer to, love, or live with any of those people leveling the criticism. So, it might be considered a red flag in the minds of some, but it is only your business and your marriage partner's business, and everyone else can be invited to bug off! So, I will agree with those who said to just have all your proof together, be prepared to defend yourself, and be positive!

[lufthgiled 6]

My fiance and I have 18 years age gap (he is also a Filipino)

and I don't see any problem with that

as long as you TRULY REALLY LOVE each other

cheer up! heads up!

c'mmon your in the Philippines!

[Miss_September 1]

Fiancée has relatives or friends in the U.S. who seem to be taking too large a role in match-making - He was introduced by my uncle who is his close friend at work.

Couple hasn’t spent enough time together in person- When he came here, we were only friends, or has the so-called Mutual understanding then I realized I am starting to love him each day of his short vacation in May, We were introduced sometime in April, First week. So we've been talking on Skype right before he decided to travel half way across the world just to meet me.

Very large age difference between the couple- he is 27 years older than me to be exact, I didn't know til I realized I am so in love with this man. It didn't bother me at all since he looks so charming and looks good to me.First time I saw him, I liked him and realized why not give me a chance to know him more

Can you guys help me see the real picture of our love story? I know its real, but of course the CO wouldn't really know how exactly how it feels. I am bothered with all this stuffs I saw on other internet websites where it says the three things I listed above are RED FLAGS?

I have seen some who got same story and got approved. but of course I also know that it is a case to case basis.

THANKS

It would not be a problem as long you are honest to your self and to your fiance.I have a friend who is married now to an American and they have 20 years age gap yet they never had a problem with her K1 visa. The process was even fast. What is important is that you have all of the requirements. Good luck!

Edited February 2, 2013 by Miss_September

[forgottenlady 2]

Thanks a lot for all your inputs. I really appreciate it.

@STEPHANN2012 You are right.....I want to interview myself and the relationship itself

We talk everyday...but I must admit that there are still thinhs that we havent talked about.

I think te idea of creating timeline is great. Ill do it on weekend.

To everyone,thanks. I dont mean to create a debate here as I know there shouldnt be.

I trully believe that what matters most is that you love each other...and everything will follow.

In a diversified world like this, its pretty normal to get perception that arent acceptable.

AGE DOEST DETERMINE THE LEVEL OF MAN'S MATURITY.

Some people think I am way too young......or the other way around which is him being older.

We have matched intellectually and emotionally which I guess has a greater weigh than the physical "biological structure of mankind.