K1 VISA WIFE LEFT BEFORE AOS

[6060842s 1]

Hello,

I am writing broken hearted as my wife of 4 months left for her home country 2 days ago without warning and claiming abuse. I am devastated and deeply hurt. I am not a newbie as I created this profile to avoid any more hurt and embarrassment.

Here is my story.

My wife was disappointed with my house, it's condition and the town I live in when she arrived. It is in town, but a rural retirement community. Narrow streets, no sidewalks, poorly lit at night. No stores near by. She wanted to walk alone but I told her it was not safe to do so. Rarely do you see people walking or riding bicycles and you NEVER see women alone. She refused to go with my sister-in-law anywhere who volunteered her days off to help her. My children (3) did not have a lot to say to her and she took it personally. They are teens and don't even talk to me!

To make the story short, problems I did not solve with my ex-wife bothered her, we have 3 children we were taking care of and she resented any contact. The children got tired of her DEMANDING they speak to her and started not coming over. This bothered me as their biological mother did nothing but encourage it. My wife did not even want her to pick them up at my mothers' house. She did not want to go to my mothers' house any more.

She began to complain about the smallest things that eventually led to arguments and verbal fights. She told me that she did not like my children and would not look after them. She said they were lazy and my daughter was a pig. This was coming from someone who got up an hour after they did. She would not even open the door when they were dropped off or even get up. She would then complain to her friends and daughter. They began encouraging her to come home. She was extremely jealous of my ex-wife and even thought there as something going on between us. When there are children involved, (one entering university) you HAVE to communicate.

To make this story short, she left 2 days ago claiming I abused her. She called a womans shelter and they took her to the airport and she went back to her country. I don't know where she got the ticket from either. She said she was afraid of me and that I was starving her with and did not have food in the house. She said I ran around the house with a gun and was afraid of me. She said I called her bad names and that I pounded my fists on the table. The only thing that as true was I called her a lazy fat A$$ and she did not like hearing the truth. I told her I was sorry over and over but like everything else, it was not good enough for her. This woman actually GAINED weight while she was here so I don't know where the starvation and lack of food came from. She complained there was no toilet because the water was turned off due to a leaking pipe in the yard. It took 3 days to fix and was an inconvenience, but it was not a permanent problem.

The bottom line was, she got here and America for her was not what she expected. She did not adjust at all and never felt like she fit in. Also, I am not wealthy. I work 6 sometimes 7 days a week for small money and money is tight. She expected all new furnishings and could not wait. I even paid for her house and utilities while she was here. She had no concept of earning and spending money. She wanted a rich man and only got me.

I could go on and on, but I have said enough. I did my best for her and it ws never enough. Nothing warranted involving a womans shelter involvement and all the false accusations. She took the marriage license to divorce me claiming one of the children took it. I am wondering if she is doing this to get some kind of benefit from me... At least I ill not pay for her house and utilities any more.

I am just venting my hurt and frustration, but would appreciate any kind words and advice.

Thanks

[TBoneTX 43,058]

This woman actually GAINED weight while she was here [...] She complained there was no toilet because the water was turned off due to a leaking pipe in the yard. [...]

The bottom line was, she got here and America for her was not what she expected. She did not adjust at all and never felt like she fit in. Also, I am not wealthy. I work 6 sometimes 7 days a week for small money and money is tight. She expected all new furnishings and could not wait. I even paid for her house and utilities while she was here. She had no concept of earning and spending money. She wanted a rich man and only got me.

If your side of the story is accurate, then good riddance. One presumes that you didn't file for AOS or AP before she left; if true, then she can't return, because the K-1 visa is a single-use document.

Divorce her, and look forward rather than back, si man. And do a hell of a better job picking your next partner,

[6060842s 1]

We did not file for AOS or AP. The papers are filled out and were to be mailed last week, but she claimed the marriage certificate was missing. The more I look into the situation, the more I realize she was interested in someone else ith more money.

[TBoneTX 43,058]

We did not file for AOS or AP. The papers are filled out and were to be mailed last week, but she claimed the marriage certificate was missing. The more I look into the situation, the more I realize she was interested in someone else ith more money.

Then very good riddance indeed.

[6060842s 1]

Can she still get money from me if we are divorced?

[aaron2020 11,651]

Which is more important - your minor children or your wife? I could never be with someone who detested my young children. Adult children would be another story.

If she is after someone with more money, then let her go. She is FUBAR for leaving the US with out you filing for AOS. She has no status in the US. She cannot return. She cannot claim VAWA since she is no longer in any danger from you.

Get a divorce and find a woman who will actually accept and love your children. There are plenty of good women who will not disrespect you, your home, and your children.

You can file for divorce. Your state will require that you notify her. No way is the US going to give her a visa to come back to the US. She'll have to pay for her own US lawyer. Chances of her hiring a US lawyer are pretty slim if she is poor.

Can she still get money from me if we are divorced?

Only if the court orders you to pay her. With a short term marriage and your limited assets, she is likely to get nothing. How the heck is she going to pay for her US lawyer? No way is the US government allowing her back to litigate the divorce. She is screwed in court.

[6060842s 1]

It got my attention that she listed things that could be termed as abuse. Some womens' shelter came and got her and took her to the airport. I found out this information from a friend of hers in the US who helped her leave.

[aaron2020 11,651]

It got my attention that she listed things that could be termed as abuse. Some womens' shelter came and got her and took her to the airport. I found out this information from a friend of hers in the US who helped her leave.

So what at this point. She has no legal status in the US. She has left the US. She can't file for VAWA from outside the US without any status in the US.

The only problem she can create for you is screw your attempt to bring another foreign bride to the US. With an abuse allegation, you may not be able to bring a fiancee to the US in the future.

File for divorce and move on.

Edited July 5, 2012 by aaron2020

[6060842s 1]

It got my attention that she listed things that could be termed as abuse. Some womens' shelter came and got her and took her to the airport. I found out this information from a friend of hers in the US who helped her leave.

Also, that friend said she was going to divorce from her country. Is that possible and can she get money from me that way?

[6060842s 1]

So what at this point. She has no legal status in the US. She has left the US. She can't file for VAWA from outside the US without any status in the US.

The only problem she can create for you is screw your attempt to bring another foreign bride to the US. With an abuse allegation, you may not be able to bring a fiancee to the US in the future.

File for divorce and move on.

Yes. She did mention that "by the time I am finished with you, you will NEVER be able to bring another woman to the USA."

Edited July 5, 2012 by 6060842s

[kzielu 1,147]

Are you sure she actually left the country ?

[6060842s 1]

Hmmm... Something else to onder about. I am pretty sure she is gone.

[AmyWrites 593]

I hate to say this.... but you got off lucky. She just left the country, didn't try to use VAWA or anything against you. It could've been much worse. *hugs*

[Anh map 2,098]

It sounds like a relationship that just didn't work.

Divorce and move on. It hurts now. But it is survivable.

[RyRo 47]

the story sounded familiar to me as i read sometime last week about this wife who couldnt accept the USC's kids and wanted the husband to give the custody to the ex-wife or she will just go back home as she was also thinking that husband and ex-wife isnt through yet... either this is the same with the thread i got to read or not this is really a sad story. A lot of people think that US is the land of milk and honey and when they get there they sure think things will be convenient for them thus living a comfortable life, i wonder if you have talked to her about your financial situation and the kind of life you will be able to give her when she gets there or that she will be living with your kids and all these stuff because if the two of you did i think she would of had a clear view of what kind of life she is going to have ones she's there but if you didnt talk about it then there is a reason why she was disappointed with the kind of life she had when she got there because there are expectations set ahead that the life in the US will be full of comfort.

My other half and I always talk about this, we are very open when it comes to this so by the time we will be living together we would adjust together with the situation especially with the current economic state of the US. Since we plan to get married all cards should be laid and be open to each other.

I am sorry of how your marriage turn out, hopefully you will find the woman who will value you for you and will love you for you and not for what you can do for them or what you can provide them with. If she really loves you she would love the people you love esp your kids and accept what you can provide her with. Move on and be happy again. God has a better plan for you and your kids