Baby Corner

[Fandango 1,439]

Congratulations again Lisa. I didn't mean to rain on your parade

TY! and you didn't, don't worry! Your experience did sound horrible, and every one of us makes our opinions formed from our own experiences. I would be upset if I were you because it sounds like you had a horrible time of things. I can't believe the kept you on your back the whole time...during my labor, they wanted me up, down, shifting, etc...they said the worst thing would be for me to lay prone the whole time. I would have probably gone insane if I had to do so.

Anyways, it's all good, and I think this is a very interesting conversation...I'm not offended at all, so if peeps wanna continue the convo, it's fine with me.

[Anna C. 4]

I never said all obgyns are bad, I found a good one in Denver after all! But it is more than fair to point out that there are very many bad ones, and in my current hometown, it is extremely hard to get a birth without saying hey doc do what you want I will comply! I was simply pointing out that finding a good birth attendant, whether obgyn, CNM or CPM is not easy in all parts of the country and asking questions is healthy. My SIL in the SFO Bay Area has a super easy time finding practioners who are not intervention pushy at all. Try that in Cheyenne, good luck. And as Eveline, I'm upset for things that were done to me in labor for no good reason, albeit Evi's experience was much worse. I don't know anyone who would be happy with bad care or unnecessary treatment. My 2nd cousin who I just met after long, long years two days ago just had a very bad experience too - just that doctors waited too long to all the shots for a section that truly was needed, which put her through 2 days of labor without epidurals or any pain meds. That's pretty sucky too - the bad treatment can come from both sides.

@ Lisa and Kelly: They wouldn't let me move during pushing - I wanted to be upright, squatting, it was in my birth plan, yet the nurse roughly pushed me down and would not let me be upright. A mom in labor is hardly able to resist such treatment, I seriously was exhausted enough as it is, but completely defenseless. The pushing stage could have been cut down if I could have pushed the way I felt was right, instead I was held hostage on my back for 2.5 hours. Not so great! I'm happy to see that other hospitals actually encourage moving and changing positions.

Edited September 12, 2010 by Anna C.

[anya-D 8]

I had the labor for 38 hrs (26 without epi) and I thought that was bad OMG 50s hrs!!!! I almost got the c-section too becasue I got a fever and they were worried but my midwife tried to give me as much time as I needed and finally Sam came out by himself (20 mins push.. that's a blessing from such a long labor) I was ready for a c section becasue I was exhaused. I'm so glad I had my midwife but it would've been fine if I were to go for C too. Sam came out with a bruse on his head a size of a galf ball becasue he was in my cervix for so long.. it went away nicely though I only had 2nd degree from a 9 lbs baby I think that's not too bad

Anyway, on a lighter note... Anybody have any thought on thumb vs pasi? If you are on pasi side, how to introduce pasi to a baby who's sucking his thumb? and how to stop him from sucking his thumb when he's older?

Thanks

Anya

[Fandango 1,439]

@ Lisa and Kelly: They wouldn't let me move during pushing - I wanted to be upright, squatting, it was in my birth plan, yet the nurse roughly pushed me down and would not let me be upright. A mom in labor is hardly able to resist such treatment, I seriously was exhausted enough as it is, but completely defenseless. The pushing stage could have been cut down if I could have pushed the way I felt was right, instead I was held hostage on my back for 2.5 hours. Not so great! I'm happy to see that other hospitals actually encourage moving and changing positions.

I wasn't dilated, so I wasn't even pushing at that point. I thought that's what Eveline meant, like pre-push but in labor. I can't speak for my hospital as to what they would have done if it was push time. I can't imagine the pain of being in labor and not being able to change positions

[Mommy2ZaidnSalma 11]

I pushed on both sides and my back, they wanted me to squat but I was just toooo tired to hold my own body weight.

Anya, I would try the paci. The paci can be taken away when you feel like making your baby kick the habit, fingers cant. Zaid never would take a paci and still sucks his fingers at 2.5 years old. Its comforting for him so I dont mind too much however, his little fingers are so blistered and chapped all the time and itch and bleed in the winter. Not to mention his finger nails on those 2 fingers are paper thin.

I cooked thanksgiving for dinner, most satisfying meal this pregnancy, however, I feel SUPER dehydrated from the food....better go chug some more water lol

[chnst 6]

Evi: you are not stepping on toes at all, omg it sounds like you had a vaginal birth and then a c/section in one day. If you push for that long regardless if you give birth or not, there will probably a lot of bruising and exhaustion than if you had went straight to the OR. I really understand how you are upset about this. I dont think that the blood pressure qualifies as pre-eclampsia. That sucks. I had some crazy experiences too, but now that I have finally found a doctor that I trust, I wouldn't question her judgement whether I need certain interventions or not. It may seem crazy and traumatizing and unreal to shift from the delivery room to the OR but in the end I'd rather trust someone who has the experience and the education.

Sara: wow I totally forgot about this, but I remember when they were sitting on my belly to push out Ben, I had the same feeling, I couldn't breathe and all I could do was turn my head to one side and vomit. I thought I was going to die. It felt like hours to me but it was probably just a minute and he was born. I really forgot that part until you brought it up.

Anya: whether paci or thumb is up to you. Either one can turn into a bad habit. Ben is a paci baby (he still is) and both paci and thumb can be very unhygienic (the paci always gets dropped or drags in the dirt and the thumb, well who's kids' hands are always clean?). I also think its equally hard to wean. We tried to get Ben to give the Binkie to the "baby squirrels" during the day but after a while he refused. And since we stopped using the "Binky chain" he wakes up at night and looks all over the bed for it. The big con with the thumb is that some children do it very long and it may affect their teeth growth.

If I can give you some advice- let him suck on either a pacifier or the thumb but make sure that it will not be the only soothing thing he has- introduce a soft blanket or a stuffed animal soon, every time he goes to sleep or every time you hold him. Having that other "lovie" may get him less focused on the sucking habit.

[Jenn! 918]

Adam took to the paci and still pretty much relies on it to sleep. I don't have any advice for switching from thumb to paci since Adam used the paci from a few weeks old. I had an argument with my mother about it because she was all like, "pacifiers are for lazy parents". Ok, mom, whatever. I'd personally rather see him with a paci than sucking his fingers, but I don't have some sort of moral objection either way, lol.

As for the whole labor and intervention issue. One thing I read that stuck with me is that any sort of intervention sharply increases the likelihood of future interventions. I was induced at 39 weeks, before my body was ready, I think. They induced me because he was 10 lbs on the u/s and I had slightly elevated blood pressure and really swollen feet. But to this day I don't believe the induction was necessary. And I was in a very reputable hospital - I remember on the tour them quoting a high induction rate and it gave me pause, but I dismissed it (next time I'll know better). They pushed really hard for me to have a c-section because of his size (which was 2 lbs off btw) and really laid the "your baby could die" guilt trip on pretty thick. I'm still resentful of that, but it helped that one of the doctors who was really trying to persuade me came in to "apologize" after he was born.

Because of the induction, I had to spend most of my labor on my back because I was hooked up to the monitor. They did allow me to get up a bit, but from what I remember, I just wanted to lie down because I barely had any time between contractions and I couldn't stand through them. After about 6 hours of labor I asked for the epidural (another intervention) and that stopped my contractions. So then they gave me pitocin (intervention #3?) to kick start me again. I pushed for 3 hours (on my back, but again I don't remember having the energy for any other position - I was on O2 for the last hour or so) and they told me his heart rate had dropped and I could either get an episiotomy and possibly a vacuum, if necessary, or else they would have to take me in for the c-section. I went with the episiotomy and was able to avoid the vacuum.

I do believe that had I not been induced that I would have been able to avoid the epidural and maybe the episiotomy. I think the epidural made the initial breastfeeding attempts more difficult.

I didn't want a c-section because of the recovery, but recovering from the episiotomy and tearing was no picnic either. I will admit though that I did really want to have the experience of a vaginal birth. I think it goes without saying though that every mother ultimately wants a healthy baby no matter how it comes out. I don't think it's about getting a medal for having a vaginal birth, though I hear that thrown around a lot. Can't one be proud of their birthing experience, whatever it was, without being accused of that? I've never heard anyone tell a mom that had a c-section that they don't get a medal for having a more difficult recovery while having to care for a newborn.

I healed up just fine down there, but an intact hooha was not a concern in the slightest.

[Eveline 9]

I've never heard anyone tell a mom that had a c-section that they don't get a medal for having a more difficult recovery while having to care for a newborn.

I have never either. I did however once have a mom tell me "Oh then you took the easy way out". That was however, without her knowing the circumstances. She didnt know the story that lead to the c/s eventually.

Paci vs. Thumb. Adam was my paci kid..he LOVED it and he had it in his mouth so much that the dentist told us he was developing an overbite. It could definetely be seen even by me. We did several attempts to take it away from him, limited it to bedtime or cartime. That worked well and he got totally off of it a few weeks after his 2nd birthday. He'd still take a paci if he had one though.

Allie on the other hand took a paci until she was about eight weeks old. The paci refusal and MeiTai refusal went hand in hand at that age. After that she kept spitting the paci out and started searching for her thumb. It's been the thumb ever since. She only uses it when she's really really tired though. She never uses it when she's in stress situations or so, just to sleep.

[tnh9479 1]

I won't even chime in on the c-section stuff because I had no choice. I was told it was 50/50 with twins whether I could deliver vaginally. Well...Zak was breech and Hana was transverse. They had been that way for more than 10 weeks!!!! I consider it a blessing to have had the c/s at almost 37 weeks and not 28.5 weeks. They had me sign all the surgery consents when they put me in the hospital then. Luckily, I had a peri who believed A LOT in bed rest and giving it a try. He helped me get my two to a point where they didn't require the NICU, even though mom was falling apart (I survived from 28.5 weeks with mild pre-E. They only delivered me when my blood platelets finally dropped to a point where they were not happy.)

As for the paci/thumb issue, Zak has always been our high needs baby. OMG...it took forever to get him to sleep when he was a newborn. We tried swings, sounds, pacis, and me sleeping with him in the recliner. It took until about 8 weeks before he would sleep well. He would use a paci sometimes, but it wasn't alot. When he found his thumb, his world changed. He is a big thumbsucker. But honestly, I prefer it over a paci. I got sick of trying to find them, sterilize them, etc. Zak in the past month has become inseperable from his "MiMi" -- his blankie. He just needs lots of comforting and I am not going to deny him either. Hana never liked pacis at all, but sucks two of her fingers when she is tired. She has seen Zak with his blankie so it has become a thing this past week that she needs hers as well.

[Staashi 371]

well, I've done both C-section and vaginal delivery and I can say, being in labor for 55 hours and then having a huge baby pulled out with forceps was no picnic. I thought the recovery from both of them was difficult.

I've said this before and I'll say it again, its not that I am naive to the idea that some docs really do push unnecessary surgeries. however, until just a few decades ago, throughout history the number one far and away cause of death for women was complications in childbirth. Its just false to think nature knows best and all that 'you wont grow a baby thats too big for your body' etc. I know personally that a hundred years ago I would have died in childbirth with either or both of my kids. Sometimes medical intervention really is 100% called for, and I am grateful for it.

This is still one of the greatest causes of death for women to this day in 3rd world countries. One of the worst places is Haiti, where out of 100,000 live births, 670 Haitian women died of pregnancy-related causes in 2006. In the United States, that number was 11.

Haiti’s maternal mortality ratio is more than five times the Latin American and Caribbean average. It is higher than any South Asian or Middle Eastern country except Afghanistan and Nepal. The worst rates are in West and Central Africa, where an average 1,110 women die per 100,000 live births.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29706995/

I'm not saying a c-section is the be all end all way to give birth - no, no, no. But it does save lives...if it was able to be performed safely and sanitarily in many 3rd world countries, so many women wouldn't lose their lives to childbirth.

[Fandango 1,439]

omG how funny, I had no idea what you all were talking about re: 'paci'...it was only now that it dawned on me.

God help my child

[JVKn'CVO 11]

Congrats again Lisa! love the little guy's pictures, he's so cute!

About your question...not sure I can help much, I didn't have a lot of gas, but I guess my advice is give it some time...you know, it's bound to pass

@Vi: yum dulce de leche!

Not sure if you have a latin market close by. I have two and they are called Fiesta and phoenicia's. An easy recipe for home made dulce de leche is: get a can of leche condensada (preferebly "la lechera"), take out the label and put it whole (not opened) on a pan of boling water for 1 hour, flipping it after 30 minutes. When you open the can, you'll have some yummy dulce de leche

Well I've said it before and I'll say it again. I think my c/s was so horrible is because I went through that long labor, pushed for 5 hrs and then ended in the OR. What upsets me is that noone made me change positions to turn an OP baby the other way around so Adam's head could engage better. Standing up the day after was terrible with two people holding me up and my husband washing the blood off of me. I couldn't even sit up by myself. I called the nurse a few times a day just to hand me my child to change diapers or nurse etc (while my husband was at home taking care of stuff).

I guess a planned c/s is not as exhausting as long labor with a c/s but I'd do vaginal birth anytime.

Eveline,

if it makes you feel any better, I went through the same thing with a midwife. so the same thing may have happened to you changing positions, squatting, pulling on the rope, midwife trying to move the cervix behind the baby's head, you name it. But it sucks, I know

You know, a lot of csection moms wonder what would have happened if they had tried a more "natural" birth. I wonder what would have happened if I have had more medical assistance.

I'd love to hear about VBAC experiences, you know...in case I ever dare go down that road

Saludos,

Caro

[Eveline 9]

Staashi: There's no doubt in my mind that c/s save babies lives as well as mothers' lives. BUT I'm not a fan of the often senseless induction-distress-c/s circle that is happening every too often. There's a reason that the c/s in the us is at 32% (when it SHOULD be somewhere between 5% - 10%. They aren't all emergencies.

[Staashi 371]

Staashi: There's no doubt in my mind that c/s save babies lives as well as mothers' lives. BUT I'm not a fan of the often senseless induction-distress-c/s circle that is happening every too often. There's a reason that the c/s in the us is at 32% (when it SHOULD be somewhere between 5% - 10%. They aren't all emergencies.

The induction/distess/c-section cycle is now more prevalent in the US because of the obesity factor. Many obese women suffer from obesity related illnesses: diabetes, HBP, heart issues, etc, which are all the more exacerbated by pregnancy. Because of the risk of having a dying placenta, doctors would rather go the route of 38-39 week induction to see if a baby can be born naturally. Most times though, it doesn't happen that way and the baby is born via c-section.

Now, for some totally healthy chick who has no issues, I do not agree at all with a c-section or induction when her body or baby are showing no signs of distress.

[Staashi 371]

Staashi: There's no doubt in my mind that c/s save babies lives as well as mothers' lives. BUT I'm not a fan of the often senseless induction-distress-c/s circle that is happening every too often. There's a reason that the c/s in the us is at 32% (when it SHOULD be somewhere between 5% - 10%. They aren't all emergencies.

The induction/distess/c-section cycle is now more prevalent in the US because of the obesity factor. Many obese women suffer from obesity related illnesses: diabetes, HBP, heart issues, etc, which are all the more exacerbated by pregnancy. Because of the risk of having a dying placenta, doctors would rather go the route of 38-39 week induction to see if a baby can be born naturally. Most times though, it doesn't happen that way and the baby is born via c-section.

Now, for some totally healthy chick who has no issues, I do not agree at all with a c-section or induction when her body or baby are showing no signs of distress.